CARTER'S POV I am still not sure how I got here. I was deeply stuck in conflict. I did not plan on this. Hell! I didn't even know it was happening until it was already too late. But now, here I was, completely stuck in a web of feelings that I could not untangle. Everything, it was all because of her. I needed to do something about her and I needed to do whatever it was swiftly. My father was going to be so pleased if he found out that I could not complete this one small task. I could already see him smirking at me with that evil glint in his mischievous eyes. He would be so gay with glee that he was correct about me being useless, me picking the wrong girl and me developing feelings for her on the mission.However, the thing was that I could not even decide whether I wanted to keep my distance from her or get closer to her. A part of me wanted to run in the opposite direction the second that she would walk into the room. But then she would say something to me or look at me in the
ALVIRA’S pov It has been about a week since I had spoken to Carter. Somehow, we had both been busy to have any spare time for ourselves due to our busy schedules. He had a lot of work that he needed to tend to according to him and I, on the other hand, was stuck to my neck with loads and loads of homework and essays. The exams were fast approaching and I needed to get back on track and finish up my work before the deadlines were up if I was to make it in time for my exams. However, between my increasing school hours and his ever growing tight schedule, we had found a way to keep in touch. Carter would always wake me up with a morning text and I would respond whenever I got up from bed. During the day, we would randomly text each other, going back and forth between our schedules. It was not much but it was enough to keep him going. At night we would have short conversations where we spoke to each other about our day and I would find myself falling asleep. Carter had been very sup
ALVIRA’S POVOnce again, Clarissa falls asleep mid way into the movie. I let out a soft chuckle as I tidied up, listening to get soft snores. I quickly but quietly packed up the bowls of popcorn and arranged the sitting room while making sure I didn’t wake her up. She was a light sleeper and the slightest noise would wake her up. I busied myself with washing the dishes and cleaning up the mess we had left earlier on. Yep, Clarissa and I had a funny habit of leaving our kitchen mess up after we finished cooking or making a snack and would only go back to clean it up after we were done eating. I took out the trash and cleared out the cabinets, unconsciously cleaning up the whole kitchen and dining area. Deep down, I know it was all just a way to distract myself from the myriad of thoughts running through my head. ‘Rissa’s question kept ringing in my head and I struggled to find a suitable answer for it. To an extent, I knew I was comfortable with my relationship with Carter and the p
ALVIRA’S POV“No,” I said a little too forcefully. I didn't want him to think that I was not interested in that.“Good," he said with another smirk. "Now, I would like to take my girlfriend out to a nice place to eat and chill for a while. Come on.” He said, guiding me to the passenger side of the car and guiding me in. As usual, he buckled me in and closed the door before walking around to his side behind the wheel. “Um, where are we going tonight?” I asked. “We are going to one of the finest restaurants in the city and perhaps, in the whole of the country, and I know this because it’s mine.” He said, a smirk on his face as he drove with one hand on the steering and the other on my lap. A few months ago, I would normally be avoiding me and keeping to myself all through. I would even have a panic attack whenever he got so close to me, not to talk of when he would touch me. I found myself getting comfortable enough around him to allow certain touches from him like this one. It was
CARTER’S POVLife was good. Or at least, that is how it seemed to me. I was enjoying life with my girlfriend, and for once in a long time, I found myself looking forward to meeting her and just being around her. She was like an escape from the chaos that was my life. I found myself unconsciously looking over at the time until when I could go over to see her and just do mundane things like going for walks, playing on a swing, taking ice cream, watching the sunset and other random flimsy things that she would always come up with. I would never admit it to anyone else but I really enjoy our time together. I still can not categorically explain what it is that I feel for her but I know that I care about her more than my brain would dare to admit. She is there when I woke up, she stays with me while I go about my day, and she is there when I go back to bed. I do not know how we got to this stage but I found myself comparing every other lady I meet to her. I keep asking myself what was so
CARTER’S POVFuck! This was so not the way I had hoped this night would end. I was too conflicted and in a lot of pain and anger as I sat across Alvira in a very uncomfortable silence. She had withdrawn from me, and I could see how she would rather be anywhere else than sitting across from me now, and the thought gnawed at me. I know right now that I am being a dickhead by openly flirting with the skanky ass dressed waitress in front of Alvira. I could see how my actions are breaking her and doing so much damage to her self esteem but I just can't help it. I am in a very sour mood from the meeting with my father and the sight of her is doing the opposite of what I expected it to do to me. I came over to see her in the hopes that seeing her would be able to calm me down. But it just constantly reminds me of how badly I need to prove myself to my father that I was not a complete failure.A part of me needed to prove to the scumbag that I could do this. That I was worthy of being a s
CARTER’S POV I watched her squirm, the feeling both nauseating and satisfying. I knew that somewhere around, my father had someone watching us right now and I wanted, no need him to know that I was capable of being whatever I wanted to be. Alvira looked everywhere but at me. The sight was both a turn on and somewhat disturbing. I enjoyed the feeling of discomfort and admired how she tried to hide it and just get through with this dinner so she could go home. “Answer me, Alvira. Did the beautiful waitress make you feel small? Do you not feel pretty? Or just flat out make you feel completely invisible?” I asked. “N- no. She- she did not.” She whispered out, nervously rubbing the tip of her ears and looking around. Of course it was a lie. She would always do that whenever she was lying or uncomfortable about something. She would nervously weave her shaky hands through her hair, moving it haphazardly away from her ear and then rub at it while her eyes darted around. “Are y
ALVIRA’S POVWhy do I have to have the worst fate when it comes to love? I thought to myself as I sobbed in the confines of my room. To think I was so stupid to think that Carter and I would ever amount to anything. That he would care for me to the point of according to me the decency of respecting me in public. I think back to the dinner we just had. It was surprising how he had gone from sweet and caring to me to being a total douchebag. Even going as far as openly flirting with that ugly looking stupid bastard lady of a waitress. Okay, I may have over exaggerated this. She was pretty, had nice toned legs that were not too thick or too thin, with perky breasts, from what I saw when she flashed them at Carter. Her face looked clear and she had a level of confidence when she walked. It was like she knew people were paying attention to her. I groaned, turning over on my bed, my eyes finding the little starry lights I had placed on the ceiling. I sighed once again. I guess I was not
ALVIRA’S POVUgh, my head hurt so bad. It felt like a thousand trains had run through my head at the same time. I felt so paralyzed and weak. I tried to move my body but realized that it hurt to even think. I took a deep breath, willing myself to finally open my eyes. Why did my eyelids feel like they were made of lead? I tried to open them, the pain in my body excruciating. What happened? Why did it feel like I was being confined to a bed?My throat was so dry. It felt like someone had run a million sandpapers on it. I definitely did not like this feeling. My toes also felt numb and cold. I tried to wiggle them but felt the same disappointment as it did not work. You can do this, Alvira. Come on. I took another deep breath and slowly willed my eyelids to open, cracking them open slightly only to shut them back, groaning. Why was it so bright? I tried to raise my hands to block the light but I could not. “Hey! Oh thank goodness you are finally awake.” A voice said, very faintly.
ALVIRA’S POV“Hey, sweets.”I turned. It was the man of my dreams, his smile was still enough to make me weak in the knees. “Carter! Oh! How I have missed you.” I said, running over to his arms. “Where have you been? I have missed you.” I said into his chest. “Please do not ever leave me alone again. I can not endure that.” I pleaded, holding him tight. “Just take a look at how pathetic you look, you disgust me with your weakness and timidity.” I raised my head, horror coating my face as I stared at the face of the one man I had ever loved. His smile was gone, now replaced by a look of utter disdain. “Carter…” “Do not ‘Carter’ me. I have always known you to be a weak little thing and never having the balls to stand up for yourself. Of course, you would run over to this place just to hide. You have always been so pathetic and it is so appalling to watch you. I mean, have you no shame?” He sneered. “Carter, please. Just tell me what you want me to do and I promise to be that for y
ALVIRA’S POVThis place was quiet and calm, just how I liked it. For the first time ever, I was finally at rest. I could finally rest. With no barriers, nothing stopping me, no one to worry about me. I could finally take a break. I look around me and realize that once again, I am left alone. However, this time feels different. It feels somewhat peaceful. Like I can finally breathe. I find myself back in the park, just by the lake. The cool evening breeze hits my brain, and I take a deep inhale. This feels so good. It is all I have ever needed and at this moment, my only wish was that I could remain in this place forever. I watch as the breeze sets a small wave over the lake, the soft sound from them clashing against the shore mixed with the whistle of the leaves on the trees overlooking the lake.I take a seat on the bench by the shore, taking in another deep breath. This felt better than great. I took in another deep breath, I could get used to this. The sun was setting and I sat
ALVIRA’S POVI walked out.I did not stop. I just kept walking. My mind was numb. My eyes were empty from having cried all through and right now, there were no more tears left to cry. I just kept walking. I walked out of the penthouse, hearing the sound of giggles from the ladies but not caring to turn back to see what was going on. I had seen and heard enough. I walked into the elevator and just stared ahead of me, seeing nothing in front of me as I waited to get out. Soon, the doors opened and I walked out of the elevator, my legs on autopilot as they carried me out of the building. I vaguely heard the doorman greeting me as I walked by but I was numb to even fake a smile and respond to him. I walked past the security and out of the gate, my legs turning left and moving back the same direction I had come in. It was a gated estate so unless you had a car, you had to walk all the way to the gate. So I walked. I walked all the way down to the gate which was about eight miles but t
ALVIRA’S POVMy world was spinning. Nothing made sense to me. How was I supposed to take in the fact that my boyfriend had not really been my boyfriend, but instead, it was I who was the pawn he had used in this twisted game between him and his father?“So, everything, every single day was a lie. Every conversation, every time we hung out, every word you said to me, every single time I opened up to you, you mean to tell me that none of that, not even one, meant anything to you?” I asked. It was a surprise to me how steady my voice was when on the inside, I could feel myself dying. Every fiber of my being, every nerve ending, every single part of me was crumbling right now. I could not believe that this was happening right now. This had to be some sick joke. I ran a hand through my hair frantically pacing around the living room. Carter cackled, his laugh so evil and twisted. I paused in my steps and turned to look at him. He looked so different. Like he was possessed. This was defini
ALVIRA’S POV“C- Carter?”“What the hell are you doing here? Williams, who the hell let her in?” I could barely move my eyes. I could not believe my eyes. What was going on? How? When? Why? No, this has got to be a dream. Yes, that was the only way to explain this situation. I was dreaming. This was nothing but a bad dream and I was going to wake up any moment from now. I pinched myself over and over to try to wake up from the dream, the pain shooting up my leg telling me that this was not a dream but reality. “I don’t know sir, I did not hear the bell ring or anything so she must have let herself in. I only met her on my way up and I tried to stop her. I am very sorry sir.” I heard Williams mutter from behind me but I could barely move my head. My eyes were stuck on the view in front of me. How could he do this to me? To us? After everything we have been through. What did I do to deserve this? Tears welled up in my eyes, blurring my vision as I remained rooted in my spot. “How?
ALVIRA’S POVMorning came by rather quickly. I had barely gotten back home last night before I crashed on the sofa and blacked out, the exhaustion and stress of everything finally getting to me. Today was the day I had silently been dreading.Thankfully, Clarissa had been cleared for natural bed rest and had been removed from induced sleep. Thankfully also, she was recovering very well. At the rate that they were going, she would be home in about two weeks if she could go on with no more complications and honestly, I was already tired of all these complications. I really hoped that this time, she could finally come home.Now that the day had come, I was freaking out. It was like the little bubble I was hiding in had finally popped and it was now time to face the reality of my life. I grudgingly stood up, shooting a quick text to Rissa to let her know I was finally awake and explaining that I blacked out as soon as my head hit the sheets. I thought about the last fight Carter and I ha
ALVIRA’S POVI must say, it was definitely a good idea for me to just leave the house and take a walk down to the park and I am entirely grateful for having Clarissa in my life. I could not even begin to imagine what I would have done or what could have happened if I did not have her around to talk to at my lowest. I probably would have been deep in gallons of milk as well as endless amounts of candies and chocolate bars, drowning in my misery and sadness. It was still looming in my mind, the feeling of being left alone and the uncertainty of what was going to happen to our relationship. How had we gone from being a happy couple who enjoyed each other’s company and loved each other to being distant from one another and going for days without talking to the other? I walked down to the ice cream truck, the familiar view helping to ease my worries. There was a line at the truck and I stood at the very end of the line, taking in the scenery and just enjoying the view of the garden. I r
ALVIRA’S POV“What do you mean he just up and left?” Rissa queried from the other end of the line. Her voice sounded weak but it was obvious that she was pissed. “I don’t even know what to do about it. I just stood there, most certainly looking like a moron as I remained glued to the ground, watching him walk out the door. It happened in what felt like seconds and for the life of me, my mind could not comprehend what and how it happened?” I explained. I was on the floor, stressed, eating like a hundred types of chocolate and candy and drowning in cups of milk. It had been over a day since the incident with Carter and I was still lost as to how to go about it. I had tried to call the hospital to speak to Rissa about it but they had explained that she was on mandatory rest. I had sucked it up that day and kind of just gone through my evening in a daze, everything happening in a blur as I moved around the house, my mind in a far off land as my body maneuvered its way around the hous