BenThis time, when I woke up, I knew exactly where I was. And it was perfect.Mila still lay on my chest, her hair splayed over my shoulder and my arm as if we hadn’t moved all night. I was sure we had stayed like this, glued to each other, and it was fine by me. After the night we’d had last night, I wanted to be stuck to her for the foreseeable future.I closed my eyes and listened to her rhythmic breathing. Nothing was stopping us from being together, now. Everyone knew, and even though not everyone was happy about it, I could be here without worrying that someone was going to catch us. We could be together in public without hiding things or talking in some kind of code about what we really felt.It was a wonderful feeling after we had been sneaking around.My mind jumped to Jerrod, and I frowned, sadness creeping in. He hadn’t been at the dinner last night. It was only proof that he was really upset about what had happened. What if we never managed to fix it?Again, I thought abo
Ben“Not yet,” David said. “I’m working on it.”“Work harder,” I said. “I want to take care of this.”David assured me that he was doing what he could before we ended the call. I took a deep breath before heading back to the table where Mila waited for me. I was suddenly panicked about my safety. They had killed two people over this, already. But I didn’t want Mila to know that something was wrong. I forced my face to be neutral, and when I returned to the table and sat down, I smiled at Mila.“What was that?” she asked.“Just a business call,” I said.“Is everything okay?”I nodded. “Nothing serious.” I sounded a lot more relaxed about it than I felt, and I had managed that lie without difficulty. Point for me. Or was it, if I was lying to her? I was doing that a lot, lately to the people in my life. But I wasn’t going to tell her what it was about. She didn’t need to know the danger I was in, and I didn’t want her to be in any danger, at all. I didn’t want her involved.This was my
MilaSince I had seen Ben on Monday, I had been so busy at the hospital I’d barely had time to breathe, let alone fantasize about the night we’d had together. I’d settled for warmth spreading through my body when I flashed on an image of his naked body, or the way he’d touched me, or the way he’d looked at me.It had been enough to get me through.I had been upset with him for suggesting we throw it all away when he’d told me he considered moving back to New York. But it seemed like that was a thing of the past. Ben and I were better than ever, and I couldn’t be happier.“You were right,” I said to Skylar at dinner after my shift that night. “I just had to give him time to sort his shit out.” I had told her about the family dinner and how amazing everything had been. I had told her about my night with Ben afterward.“See, you should listen to me more often,” Skylar said with a wink.I laughed, but the laughter drained away, quickly.“What’s wrong?”“It was just a rough day at work.”“
MilaLosing your best friend and your sister over something like that seemed a bit drastic, though. But that was Jerrod to a tee. He was dramatic in the best sense of the word.My phone rang.“It’s Ben,” I said.“So? Answer it,” Skylar said.I held the phone to my ear. “I was hoping I would hear from you, soon,” I said with a smile.“Can I see you tonight?” Ben asked. He sounded stressed.“Yeah, sure. Is everything okay?”“Yeah, I just want to talk. Can I come over?”I glanced at Skylar. She was frowning.“I’m with Skylar at the moment, but I can meet you somewhere soon.”“Okay, I’ll meet you at your place.”He ended the call without much of a goodbye, and I put down my phone on the table.“What was that all about?” Skylar asked.“I have no idea. He sounds very serious. I’m so sorry to cut this short, but I need to go.”“Don’t be sorry, I understand,” Skylar said.I asked to have the rest of my food to-go, and Skylar and I settled the bill, each paying half. I hugged her when we left
Ben“Are you sure you have everything?” my mom asked on Thursday morning, standing in the doorway to my room. “Have you checked the bathroom?”I nodded. My mom was just looking out for me so I didn’t tell her that I knew what it was like to move from one place to another and make sure I was leaving nothing behind. God knows I had done more than enough of that in the past seven years.“Okay, sweetheart.” She walked toward me and gave me a hug. It was unexpected, and I stiffened before I relaxed and wrapped my arms around her.“I’m sorry I’m leaving again so soon,” I said.“Don’t be,” my mom said, shaking her head. “If anyone understands, it’s me. Your father left you that company. I realize that it’s the only thing you have left of him, and it’s your choice to fill his shoes.”“You don’t think I’m being an idiot?”“Of course, not. You’re doing a noble thing by honoring your father and Dean.” She sat down on the makeshift bed, and I sat down next to her.“Every time I’m here, I feel li
Ben“I’m going to honest with you,” he said. “I don’t give a shit what you want. I don’t care about fixing things between us. I’m not the one that fucked it up.”“Come on, I’m trying here,” I said.Jerrod shook his head and picked up another glass. “No, you’re trying to get a clear conscience before you run back to your fancy life. Tell me, is Mila coming with you?”I shook my head. “No, she’s staying.”Jerrod frowned, pausing with the glass in his hands. “So you’re just ditching her?”I groaned. “I can’t do anything right in your eyes, can I? First, you’re mad that I’m with her. Now, you’re mad that I’m not?”“No, I’m mad that you’re being a dick. First to me, and now to my sister. She cares about you. I’m sure you know that. She wouldn’t risk her relationship with me if she didn’t give a shit. But now you’re leaving again, and she has to sit back here wondering what the hell she did wrong. You’re a real asshole, Ben.”There was nothing I could say to that. It was more complicated th
MilaI should have worked on Friday, but I took a personal day instead. The board had taken one look at me and granted me the time off.I was exhausted. It wasn’t just lack of sleep or because I was overworked. My soul was tired.So much had happened on my last shift and I wasn’t able to cope with it very well. I was emotionally drained.The mother of three passing away, although she was nothing to me, had really knocked me hard. I couldn’t let go of it, and I found that I cried myself to sleep about it sometimes.It didn’t help that my tears were already so close to the surface, thanks to Ben and what he’d done to me. It was his fault that everything else was suddenly impossible to deal with. I was always so strong, I could handle whatever came my way. Sure, sometimes it was hard. But that didn’t mean that I couldn’t do it.Now, I felt like I was on the verge of breaking completely.I had managed to get through work yesterday, but it had taken a toll on me. I had mulled over what Ben
MilaMy phone rang. I let it roll over to voicemail. I knew it wouldn’t be Ben.When it stopped ringing and started right up again, I knew who it was. Skylar was the only person that knew that she had to keep trying when I wasn’t okay. And she knew how broken I was.After Ben had left on Wednesday, I had called her, crying about what he’d done to me.“I thought you were avoiding calls,” she said when I answered. “Get dressed and come over. You need to get out of the house.”“How did you know I wasn’t dressed?”“Because you’re miserable. You’re probably in your towels.”Skylar knew me too well.“I don’t think I’m going to come over, today,” I said. I wasn’t in the mood.“I’m not asking, I’m telling. Come on, you have to do something.”I sighed and agreed. Skylar was right, and if anyone could mobilize me, it was my best friend. At least I still had her.I changed into jeans and a t-shirt, ballerina flats and pulled my hair into a ponytail because it had dried like shit after all.When