Ben“Not yet,” David said. “I’m working on it.”“Work harder,” I said. “I want to take care of this.”David assured me that he was doing what he could before we ended the call. I took a deep breath before heading back to the table where Mila waited for me. I was suddenly panicked about my safety. They had killed two people over this, already. But I didn’t want Mila to know that something was wrong. I forced my face to be neutral, and when I returned to the table and sat down, I smiled at Mila.“What was that?” she asked.“Just a business call,” I said.“Is everything okay?”I nodded. “Nothing serious.” I sounded a lot more relaxed about it than I felt, and I had managed that lie without difficulty. Point for me. Or was it, if I was lying to her? I was doing that a lot, lately to the people in my life. But I wasn’t going to tell her what it was about. She didn’t need to know the danger I was in, and I didn’t want her to be in any danger, at all. I didn’t want her involved.This was my
MilaSince I had seen Ben on Monday, I had been so busy at the hospital I’d barely had time to breathe, let alone fantasize about the night we’d had together. I’d settled for warmth spreading through my body when I flashed on an image of his naked body, or the way he’d touched me, or the way he’d looked at me.It had been enough to get me through.I had been upset with him for suggesting we throw it all away when he’d told me he considered moving back to New York. But it seemed like that was a thing of the past. Ben and I were better than ever, and I couldn’t be happier.“You were right,” I said to Skylar at dinner after my shift that night. “I just had to give him time to sort his shit out.” I had told her about the family dinner and how amazing everything had been. I had told her about my night with Ben afterward.“See, you should listen to me more often,” Skylar said with a wink.I laughed, but the laughter drained away, quickly.“What’s wrong?”“It was just a rough day at work.”“
MilaLosing your best friend and your sister over something like that seemed a bit drastic, though. But that was Jerrod to a tee. He was dramatic in the best sense of the word.My phone rang.“It’s Ben,” I said.“So? Answer it,” Skylar said.I held the phone to my ear. “I was hoping I would hear from you, soon,” I said with a smile.“Can I see you tonight?” Ben asked. He sounded stressed.“Yeah, sure. Is everything okay?”“Yeah, I just want to talk. Can I come over?”I glanced at Skylar. She was frowning.“I’m with Skylar at the moment, but I can meet you somewhere soon.”“Okay, I’ll meet you at your place.”He ended the call without much of a goodbye, and I put down my phone on the table.“What was that all about?” Skylar asked.“I have no idea. He sounds very serious. I’m so sorry to cut this short, but I need to go.”“Don’t be sorry, I understand,” Skylar said.I asked to have the rest of my food to-go, and Skylar and I settled the bill, each paying half. I hugged her when we left
Ben“Are you sure you have everything?” my mom asked on Thursday morning, standing in the doorway to my room. “Have you checked the bathroom?”I nodded. My mom was just looking out for me so I didn’t tell her that I knew what it was like to move from one place to another and make sure I was leaving nothing behind. God knows I had done more than enough of that in the past seven years.“Okay, sweetheart.” She walked toward me and gave me a hug. It was unexpected, and I stiffened before I relaxed and wrapped my arms around her.“I’m sorry I’m leaving again so soon,” I said.“Don’t be,” my mom said, shaking her head. “If anyone understands, it’s me. Your father left you that company. I realize that it’s the only thing you have left of him, and it’s your choice to fill his shoes.”“You don’t think I’m being an idiot?”“Of course, not. You’re doing a noble thing by honoring your father and Dean.” She sat down on the makeshift bed, and I sat down next to her.“Every time I’m here, I feel li
Ben“I’m going to honest with you,” he said. “I don’t give a shit what you want. I don’t care about fixing things between us. I’m not the one that fucked it up.”“Come on, I’m trying here,” I said.Jerrod shook his head and picked up another glass. “No, you’re trying to get a clear conscience before you run back to your fancy life. Tell me, is Mila coming with you?”I shook my head. “No, she’s staying.”Jerrod frowned, pausing with the glass in his hands. “So you’re just ditching her?”I groaned. “I can’t do anything right in your eyes, can I? First, you’re mad that I’m with her. Now, you’re mad that I’m not?”“No, I’m mad that you’re being a dick. First to me, and now to my sister. She cares about you. I’m sure you know that. She wouldn’t risk her relationship with me if she didn’t give a shit. But now you’re leaving again, and she has to sit back here wondering what the hell she did wrong. You’re a real asshole, Ben.”There was nothing I could say to that. It was more complicated th
MilaI should have worked on Friday, but I took a personal day instead. The board had taken one look at me and granted me the time off.I was exhausted. It wasn’t just lack of sleep or because I was overworked. My soul was tired.So much had happened on my last shift and I wasn’t able to cope with it very well. I was emotionally drained.The mother of three passing away, although she was nothing to me, had really knocked me hard. I couldn’t let go of it, and I found that I cried myself to sleep about it sometimes.It didn’t help that my tears were already so close to the surface, thanks to Ben and what he’d done to me. It was his fault that everything else was suddenly impossible to deal with. I was always so strong, I could handle whatever came my way. Sure, sometimes it was hard. But that didn’t mean that I couldn’t do it.Now, I felt like I was on the verge of breaking completely.I had managed to get through work yesterday, but it had taken a toll on me. I had mulled over what Ben
MilaMy phone rang. I let it roll over to voicemail. I knew it wouldn’t be Ben.When it stopped ringing and started right up again, I knew who it was. Skylar was the only person that knew that she had to keep trying when I wasn’t okay. And she knew how broken I was.After Ben had left on Wednesday, I had called her, crying about what he’d done to me.“I thought you were avoiding calls,” she said when I answered. “Get dressed and come over. You need to get out of the house.”“How did you know I wasn’t dressed?”“Because you’re miserable. You’re probably in your towels.”Skylar knew me too well.“I don’t think I’m going to come over, today,” I said. I wasn’t in the mood.“I’m not asking, I’m telling. Come on, you have to do something.”I sighed and agreed. Skylar was right, and if anyone could mobilize me, it was my best friend. At least I still had her.I changed into jeans and a t-shirt, ballerina flats and pulled my hair into a ponytail because it had dried like shit after all.When
BenThe moment I touched down in New York I was caught up in the fever of the city. I was thrown into the deep end at work, and I had to tread water all the time. I didn’t even have time to think about Mila and everyone else back home.And that was a good thing. I knew the moment I thought about Mila too long I would feel terrible for what I had done to her. And I would struggle with a broken heart because by hurting her, I had also hurt myself.On Saturday morning, I met with Ms. Houghton again. The realtor had been all too happy to hear from me. Even though I hadn’t taken the other place, she knew I had money judging by the houses she showed me, and if she sold one to me, it meant her paycheck was going to be a big one.“It’s a pity the other place was scooped up, after all,” she said to me after we made small talk. “It was a perfect fit for you. But not to worry, I have a few houses for you to look at.”I wasn’t in the mood to fuss. When we’d gone through the first house with Ms. H
BenI had sold the company as Jerrod had suggested. I had thought about it long and hard and decided it was what I wanted. I hadn’t wanted to be the CEO of the company in the first place. Not when my father had left it to me and not when Uncle Dean had, either. I had put in the work and found someone worthy of the company. I heard it was thriving, now.The money received for the company sale had been enough to pay Brantley, and I still had enough left to give Penny an amount. I felt Uncle Dean’s widow had deserved a bit of an allowance after everything she had been through because of my father.After Brantley and Penny, I had bought a large house in Portland for me, Mila and Landon, and I had put the rest away as an investment for the future. We had so much money we would never struggle, even if we both stopped working.Mila and I were both working because we loved what we did. Mila didn’t want to stop nursing after she had Landon, and I understood. She asked for fewer shifts so that
BenSeven Months LaterWhen I unlocked the door to the house I had bought six months ago, I was stepping over the threshold as a father. It was the first time, and I was very aware of it. A lump rose in my throat, but I swallowed it down.“Ready?” I asked Mila. She nodded and climbed out of the car. She moved comfortably. It was amazing how women bounced back from giving birth in no more than a day or two. It would have been different if she had had a C-section or something, but Mila had given birth naturally.She opened the car door and lifted the carrier out of its brace.“I’m coming,” I said, running to her. I took the carrier from her so she didn’t have to strain herself and put my arm around her as I carried little Landon in the other hand.Mila had given birth to a beautiful baby boy twenty-four hours ago. It had been a beautiful surprise. I would have been just as proud if it was a girl, but I was so happy it was a boy. Landon Atwood had a great ring to it.We walked together t
MilaAgain, he didn’t touch my pussy even though he came so close. Instead, he moved up my hip bones and kissed my stomach, my ribs, moving past my breasts to my shoulders and working his way down one arm. When he reached my fingers, he sucked them into his mouth and played with his tongue around them. It was a strange feeling, ticklish and such a turn on.Ben let go of my hand and moved across my chest, avoiding my breasts, moving over my shoulder and down my other arm. When he reached my fingers, I was just about losing my mind with lust. I wanted him inside me so badly, and he’d been teasing me by not touching any of the areas I so desperately wanted him to touch.When Ben pressed his fingers against my pussy, I jumped. I had wanted it so badly, now that I had it, it was like a jolt of electricity shooting into my body. Ben pressed his thumb against my clit and pushed two fingers into me. He moved his thumb while curling his fingers over my G-spot, and it didn’t take long at all be
MilaLate on Friday night, my phone rang. I was already sleeping, and it took me a while to find my phone on my nightstand.“Are you awake?” Ben asked.I smiled. “I am, now.”“Can I come over? I have great news.”I looked at the alarm clock next to my lamp. The red numbers said it was well after midnight.“Of course,” I said.Half an hour later, a cab pulled up and dropped Ben off in front of my apartment building. I had been looking out for him. I buzzed him up before he rang my apartment, and I smiled when he stumbled up the step to the front door. He had been drinking.When I opened the front door to him, he stepped forward and folded me against his body.“I missed you,” he said.I laughed. “It’s been two days.”“Two days too many,” Ben said. He smelled like beer and cigarette smoke.“Where were you?” I asked.“I was at the bar, having drinks with Jerrod.”I raised my eyebrows. It was good news. Unexpected, and good. I led Ben into my apartment and closed the door.“Get back in bed
BenI shook my head. “I won’t. I know I haven’t treated her right, but I thought I was doing the right thing. I’m sticking around, now. I’m not going anywhere. I’m madly in love with her. Mila is one of a kind.”Jerrod nodded. “She is. And I can see how you feel about her. I have no doubt that you care for her. It just pissed me off so much that I was the last to know.”“I get that,” I said. I really did feel bad for what we’d done. But there was only so many times I could say I was sorry. I knew that this time, Jerrod had accepted my apology.Jerrod nodded again. We both drank our beers, listening to the music and watching the crowds shuffle in. As the night dragged on, the bar filled up with patrons who were done with their work week and looking for a way to unwind.“It’s just all so unexpected,” Jerrod said after a while. “Your relationship with her when I still see her as a kid is one thing. But now she’s pregnant. Man.” He scrubbed his face with his hands. “I don’t know what to m
BenOn Friday I walked into the bar where Mila and I had gone with Jerrod and Skylar. We hadn’t been careful enough that night, and Jerrod had seen us together. That was when the trouble had all started between me and Jerrod, and I was hoping this was where it would all end.I had texted him, telling him I was going to be at the bar tonight. I wanted to talk to him, but I was tired of running after him when he wasn’t interested. I had asked him to come to meet me. He hadn’t replied. I had told him what time I was going to be there, and now that I was here, time would tell if Jerrod was going to show up to talk to me.My wristwatch told me it was eight o’clock. I would give him half an hour before I left again.Until now, everything had been about Jerrod. He had been the one who had been wronged. Mila and I had kept our relationship secret from him when it was already a no-no that his best friend and younger sister were dating. It had been wrong not to tell him and even worse that he h
Mila“I love you, too.”There was nothing else to say. Words couldn’t describe how we both felt at that moment.After I changed back into my clothes, we met Dr. Holt in her office again. She gave me a prescription for prenatal supplements and an eating plan with do’s and don’ts for the next seven months.“I’ll see you back here in about eight weeks,” Dr. Holt said. “Then we’ll find out what you’re having.”When Ben and I walked back to the car, I felt like I was walking on air. Everything felt different, now. I felt more ready to be a mother, to have this baby and to raise it, than I had before. Now that I had seen the baby, I knew that I wanted all of this.Did Ben feel the same?“You know, you still have time to back out of this,” I said to Ben. He stopped dead in his tracks and looked at me.“What makes you think I would want that?” he asked.I pulled up my shoulder. I couldn’t guarantee that this feeling of amazement was mutual. Ben took a step closer to me and kissed me long and
MilaOn Wednesday I had the day off again and had scheduled an ultrasound. Now that everyone knew about me being pregnant, it was time to meet the baby.Ben was with me. It made me less nervous, but only a little. It was crazy how tense I was about the appointment, even though everything was out in the open now. The idea that I was pregnant, that we were having a baby, was terrifying.It had all happened so fast. It had been mere weeks since Ben had come back to Portland for the first time and now we were starting a family together. There were nights when I was sleepless and in a fit of panic, wondering how the hell we were going to get through this. We had been a part of each other’s lives for years, but when it came down to knowing each other, we were practically strangers.When I was with Ben, like now, all my worries melted away. We were great together. He was so attentive now that I was pregnant, and since he had told me he was going to stay, our relationship was stronger than ev
BenI let go of Jerrod’s shirt. He stumbled back, his expression surprised. Maybe he had expected me to throw the first punch. He had been ready to fight me. But I wasn’t here for that. I hadn’t come to beat up my best friend. I had only come to set the record straight.“She’s a great person, Jerrod. You know that. She doesn’t deserve this shit.”I turned around and left the office. Jerrod stayed behind, gaping. I had never been one to back down from a fight. There had been enough fights in high school that had shown Jerrod that. But this wasn’t high school, and Jerrod was like a brother to me. If I ended up with Mila, he would be a brother-in-law, in fact.So, I wasn’t going to go there.Instead, I headed back home like a good boy to seethe in private.After I had taken the time to calm down, I phoned Mila.“How are you doing?” I asked.“Better,” she said, and I was relieved. “I came off my shift just now. I’m going to crawl into bed for a few hours.“Have you told your parents yet?”