Get Some Air

Mila

I could have taken my break, of course. But it was difficult for me to carry on with life as usual when a man was fighting for his life and looking like he was going to lose. I couldn’t worry about the patient making it the one moment and have lunch in the cafeteria like nothing was wrong, the next. I would take my break when I could stomach the idea that sometimes we lost patients.

Before the kidnapping, I had struggled with the concept of losing a patient, but it wasn’t this bad. Now, I felt like throwing up, like I was going to break apart if this old man didn’t make it. I had always been strong in situations like this even though it had affected me badly. What had changed? Why was I so much more emotionally involved than before?

Maybe it was because I had been through a difficult time. When I had thought that my own death was around the corner. Maybe I wasn’t emotionally as alright as I thought I was. For the first time since the incident, I considered going to see someone ab