Ika-anim na Kabanata - Ang Pagkunsulta

I dragged my tired and restless body to the bathroom and took care of my personal hygiene. After some time, I finally finished taking a bath. Buti pa sa pagligo ilang minute lang ang ginugugol ko hindi gaya kapag dumarating ang heat cycle ko. It took me six days to calm down from the heat, three days to open my eyes without flinching and getting dizzy, two days to recover from being lightheaded, and one day to finally get out of bed.

Wow, this is the most severe heat I’ve been through. Nagsimula lang talaga ito noong nagkita kaming muli ni Takeru. Akala ko tumalab na ang special inhabitor na tinurok ko sa katawan ko, hindi pala. My body seems to be rejecting the inhabitor since my mate is already around. Sa tingin ko kapag nagkita kaming muli ay hindi ko na kakayanin.

I need to go to my doctor.

Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko at nakita ko ang mga texts and calls from my friends and families. Napabuntong hininga na lang ako.

Thank goodness that Kenji, Daisuke, and Kasumi were with me at that time. Sila ang tumulong sa akin na maka-recover. They always monitor my heat, and I guess I tortured them too much.

An omega with an alpha but no one by his side when he was in heat is the worst. The body will crave and lust over his alpha and eventually lose its rationality. Sa tingin ko nawala ako sa katinuan nang mga oras na iyon.

My family knows about my situation. Alam nil ana bonded ako and alam din nila that something happened and we had to break the bond. I was almost beaten to death by my mother because of that.

Omega only has one chance to take a mate, and I lost mine.

Gusto nilang malaman kung sino ang nagbigay ng marka sa akin ngunit hindi ko sinabi sa kanila. I know they can investigate; that’s why I did my best to erase everything that will lead to Takeru. Hindi ko gusto na may gawin silang hindi maganda kay Takeru, kahit na alam ko na siya ang nag-break ng bond naming dalawa. Even though he was the one who rejected me as his mate.

Napahaplos naman ako ng dibdib ko dahil sa sakit na naramdaman ko. Huminga ako nang malalim dahil pakiramdam ko ay parang maiiyak na naman ako. Wala na akong lakas para umiyak pero ang mata ko parang hindi pa nauubusan ng luha na ilalabas. Every time I think about the fact that he was the one who broke the bond between us, that he was the one who rejected me, it feels like hell.

What do I do?

Wala sa wisyo naman akong napahawak sa likod ng leeg ko. The mark is eating up my body. I guess that's why I’m having a hard time passing my heat.

I called my doctor and told him that my heat has ended and I can finally walk. That I will visit him and consult him on something. After the call, I inform everyone that I am finally okay and that I will go to the hospital to consult my doctor.

Napangiwi naman ako nang makita ko ang caller ID at nabasa ko ang salitang ‘Mommy’. Parang gusto ko na naman umiyak.

"Brat!"

Napaupo naman ako dahil sa boses ni mommy. I never saw him for years. "Mom," I called him.

My mom is a male omega. He was pretty and gracious when he was in his early years, and a lot of alphas were lining up to be his mate. However, pity those who did not win his heart. He wants family with love, not family with benefits. I guess iyon ang personality na nakuha ko kay mommy.

I heard him sigh. "Child, are you okay?" I heard his concern. I smiled. "I heard you suffered from severe heat; is that true?"

"Um."

"Aoi," he called my name, and I almost choked. "I know you are suffering, and I know that you are still protecting him. But child, what are you going to do? It makes me feel crazy whenever I hear about you being in pain. Aoi, please, do something about it. You know how much harm it will give your body."

My eyes teared up. "Mom," I called him and took a deep breath to calm my voice. "I know how harmful it is, but still, I don’t want to. Mom, even if this is already broken, I still wanted to cherish it."

I did not hear anything from him but a sigh. I know that he knows what I am talking about. For an omega, having a mate is indeed a great thing. However, having a broken bond that came from love, even if it was already over from Omega’s point of view, we still want to cherish it.

"Alright," Mom said. I guess he was shaking his head. "Please take good care of your body well. I know that you will not be going to visit the house for a while, so we want you to take care of yourself. Don’t do anything reckless, okay?"

I nodded my head even though I knew that he couldn’t see it. "Yes, Mom. Thank you. Send regards to Dad, Brothers, and Sisters."

I heard my mom snort. "I don’t want to. If you want, tell us your address, and we’ll visit you."

Napangiwi naman ako. "Mom, I know you have your ways to know my address, it does not require me to tell you about it."

I heard him laugh. "Brat, you really know how to talk back." I smiled. I missed him. "Alright, since you’re already back in our country, it does not matter if we know your address or not. At least we can see you whenever we want to."

Hindi naman na nagtagal pa ang usapan naming dalawa ni Mommy, kaya naman nag-ayos na ako at umalis papunta sa hospital.

My personal doctor is my friend’s friend. He was Rayle’s friend. Rayle personally suggests him since he is an expert in the field of omega and has done research about the omega's broken bond.

"Hello, Aoi," the doctor greeted me when I opened his office.

Napalingon ako sa paligid at ngumiti. "Nothing changes in your office aside from your position, I guess?"

Tumango naman siya at saka ako pinaupo sa upuan sa harap ng table niya. "Long time no see. Usually nag-uusap lang tayo through video call," nakangiti kong sabi.

"Long time no sees. How are you?" she asked in a concerned voice.

Akira Lim is a female omega. Despite being an omega, she strives to be a doctor, and now, every omega that needs a checkup is going directly to her. Iyon ang advantage ni Akira sa hospital na ito. There are only a few omega doctors, and if I guess it right, they can only be counted on the fingers of one hand.

After a few talks, we finally started to get into our business. Isa isa ko na sinabi sa kaniya ang mga nangyari at kaagad naman niya itong sinusulat. While I am explaining things to her, she jots them down. I think she’ll use it in her future research. My circumstances gave her a lot of information about a broken bond. Even though there are so many omegas with broken bonds, because of the law, those alphas without power couldn’t divorce or break up with an omega.

"Hmm…" Napatitig lang ako kay Akira dahil pakiramdam ko hindi maganda ang sasabihin niya. "Aoi, hindi mo ba talaga iko-consider ang gland removal surgery?" tanong niyang muli sa akin.

Ngumiti ako at umiling. "Kahit na ilang beses mo akong tanungin ay hinding hindi ko gagawin iyan. This…" Napahawak naman ako sa batok ko. "It's the only thing he left for me." Nakita ko naman ang concern sa mukha ni Akira. "You don’t have to feel responsible about it," sambit ko pa at alanganin na ngumiti. "Alam ko na hindi maganda ito sa katawan ko pero, Doc., wala talaga akong balak."

Napabuntong hininga si Akira. "Alam mo naman pal ana nakakasama sa katawan mo hindi mo pa rin kino-consider," nailing niyang sambit. "Aoi, what are you going to do? Since you came back to our country, the special inhabitor doesn’t work on you anymore," he said, thinking about something.

Napangiwi naman ako. "Can we just add some?" alanganin ko na tanong.

Napatigil naman si Akira sa sinabi ko at tumitig sa akin. I think I said something I shouldn’t have. His stares tell me that I look like an idiot in his eyes. "Ang dalawa ay nakakasama na sa katawan ng omega, let alone four. Now you want to add more?" taas kilay niyang sambit. Napasandal siya sa upuan niya at saka taimtim na nakatitig sa akin. "Aoi, do you have a death wish? Do you want to suffer before you die?"

Napatigil naman ako sa sinabi ni Akira. Ayokong mag-suffer muna bago mamatay, pero ayoko rin naman na alisin ang mark ni Takeru sa akin. Kahit ito lang ang matira sa akin, kahit wala nang iba pa.

"Doc., you know how much I value this broken bond, right?" He nodded his head. "Can you just give me another one? I’ll try if it works. If not, then I’ll talk to my boss."

Napabuntong hininga naman si Akira. "You know, Aoi, if you’re not part of the research, for sure the government will warn you. Thankfully, you are part of the research they started. Thus, this will sure be an advancement."

I just smiled and did not speak. Kahit na ayoko na sumali sa research nila, ito lang ang nag-iisang paraan para makakuha ako ng maraming inhabitor in a month to suppress my heat. A normal omega only has one special inhabitor allocated per month. Having more than one will only get a warning from the government.

"Aoi, may I see the mark?"

Tumango naman ako at tumalikod. Since we’re both omegas, it does not matter to me if she saw it. Also, she is a doctor.

"Oh my god!"

I flinched when she exclaimed. I looked at her worriedly. "Is there something wrong?" I asked. I saw the hesitation in her eyes. "Doc, you don’t have to lie to me."

She sighed before she took her seat and closed her eyes. "The black spider-web like on your mark has reached your wing part of your back." She looked at me in the eyes. "Aoi, are you sure you're not going to have surgery?"

It reaches my wing joint?

I bit my lower lip. Now it's getting more and more serious. Still, I don’t want to.

I smiled. "No, I don’t want to. Can you prescribe me? Or do you have a special inhabitor here?"

Napahawak naman siya sa sintido niya at hinilot hilot niya ito. "Aoi, you are the very most stubborn patient I’ve ever encountered. You never listen to me."

"But that is the reason why you have a lot of data about broken bonds, right?"

She stiffened and looked at me in disbelief. Of course, sino bang nasa matinong katinuan na hahayaan na maging research, di ba?

"Fine," she said defeatedly. Yumuko siya nang kaunti at saka naman naglagay ng isang box. Sa table. "Mayroong limang syringe riyan. Once you encounter your heat, try to use four first. Kapag hindi gumana ay doon mo na gamin ang last one, okay? Also, stay away from that man." I tilted my head at mas lalo naman siyang napahilot sa sintido niya. "From your ex-mate. Stay away from him."

"I think that is impossible," I said straightforwardly.

Napatulala naman siya sa akin at kulang na nga lang ay malaglag ang panga niya sa sinabi ko. "What?" taas kilay na tanong niya. "Hindi ka lalayo sa lalaking iyon? Aoi, don’t you think you’re being unreasonable here? Ano pang kwenta ko o ng kahit na sinong doctor, kung hindi mo naman kami susundin?"

I slowly shook my head. "Hindi naman sa ayaw kitang sundin."

Mas lalo naman na kumunot ang noo niya. "Then what? Pinapalayo kita sa lalaking iyon pero hindi ka naman lalayo? Aoi, mahigpit pa ba ang turnilyo mo sa utak? Para kasing sobrang luwag na at kailangan nang higpitan. Kung gusto mo ako na ang maghihigpit."

Mahina naman akong natawa. "Hindi na kailangan," sambit ko at saka binigyan siya ng ngiti. "Akira, thank you for always tolerating this attitude of mine. Also, hindi dahil sa ayaw ko siyang layun. We are both now working on the same project. My company has signed a contract with his company, and now we’re collaborating for the success of that big project." Napayuko naman ako. "Even though I wanted to avoid him, I couldn't. I am the one who was responsible for everything in that said project, and that was handed to me specially from my boss."

"Damn, this is so—" instead of completing her sentence, she sighed heavily. "Fine. Contact me as soon as possible whenever you felt uncomfortable or weird, do you understand?"

I saluted. "Yes, Ma’am."

"D*amn you! Why are you acting like military personnel? We don’t even have a chance to enter the military," she said.

Natawa naman ako. "Right, omega is excepted from that," nailing kong sabi.

Since may iba pang pasyente si Akira ay kaagad naman akong nagpaalam na sa kaniya. The reason why she made me come before the patient is that she wanted to see my condition. Dahil nga part ako ng research ng government ay hands on siya sa akin. Isa pa, friend din siya ni Rayle. Si Rayle ay part ng circle ko na ang leader ay si Kenji.

Every omega should have a circle that will assist them whenever something happens to them. Nowadays, since the news broke about the slavery of an omega in country S and that there are a lot of omegas discriminated against in country J, the government gives the omega priority.

Nang nasa first floor na ako, nagpunta muna ako sa front desk para magtanong kung magkano ang gagastusin ko. Kahit naman isa ako sa government research team, ayoko pa rin na may utang ako. I mean, yung pera kasi na binibigay sa akin ng government as a payment sa mga data na binibigay ko sa kanila ay binibigay ko rin sa mga nanganailangan.

"Alright, Sir. Wait lang po," sabi ng nurse sa akin.

Tumango naman ako. Wala namang masama sa paghihintay.

"Aoi?"

I stiffened. Ito ang masama.

Napalingon naman ako at nakita ko si Takeru. Kaagad na hinanap ng mata ko kung sino ang kasama niya and I conclude that he is alone. Oh my god, what am I going to do? I just recovered from my heat, and even though I am already okay, seeing him after my heat will only make my situation worse. My body was telling me to jump into him, to be with him, to smell him, to make him mine again. However, I restrain myself.