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12. Bryanna
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Related chapters
Always 13. Bryanna
Detaching his lips, Nate says, “I waited all day to do that.”“Yeah?” My voice is hoarse from the kiss.He kisses me again as an answer.We do this for awhile, a long while, and I still could do it longer if not for the fact that we need to breathe. Drawing out, I inhale deeply before starting another round. Kissing him is officially my number one favorite activity to do right now.I can feel his lips twitch with his usual cocky smirk and taste the satisfaction in his tongue. He likes the way I reacted to his kiss. He likes it that I like his touch. “Nate,” I moan his name.He chuckles. “What do you want, Beautiful?” He asks on my lips.I want you. I want you so bad. I want you, like, yesterday. But, I couldn’t say that out loud. I recall one of Morwenna’s advice she deemed is the keys to a successful dating. ‘Push and pull, Bry. Know when to push and how to pull. The art of this push and pull is what will lure him. And remember, don’t show all your cards.’Well, it’s too late to hide
Always 14. Lincoln
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I roar. I fucking roar like a lion at the scene in front of me. My blood is boiling. My heart feels like it would bursts out of my fucking chest. I can’t even, fuck! Fucking fuck, fuck, fuck!I clench my fists so damn hard I’m sure it’ll bleed soon if they don’t fucking stop. They should have stopped, like five seconds ago. Or, my fisted hands won’t be the only thing bleeding ....That fucking asshole is shirtless, hovering above Bryanna while he fucking devours her like a starving mad man. His lips on hers, his hands, fuck, I don’t want to think about where his hand was, still is, but ...."Fuck!"My booming voice finally, fucking finally, stops them and prevents them from mauling each other any further. He looks up, as Bryanna turns her head so she can see me standing here fucking fuming. “Lincoln, what are you doing here?” she rasps, wide-eyed, scrambling to sit and fix her half ridden shirt.I look at her and catalogue her state: tousled hair, flushed
Always 15. Lincoln
So, some of you might say that I’m a fool. Others might think I’m crazy. You know what? I think of myself as both: I am a fool and I am crazy.I am a fool to be in love with a girl who not only didn’t know I love her, but also pretty much on the way of loving someone else. I am crazy to keep pining on her eventhough this feeling is most likely never to be reciprocated.In his song, Mokita said he needed to know that he didn’t fall in love alone this time. Well, whoever you are, tell him a good luck from me. Because, here, I already know that I’ve fallen in love alone, all this time.I knew it and I couldn’t stop.I knew why and I won't stop.That’s the thing about love.It didn’t have a switch. You love when you love. You can’t turn it on, or off, anytime you want. Or, in my case, when I discovered that there’d be no love between us, as she said to my face.Sad? Yes.Pathetic? Absolutely.But, what can I say? What can I do? Nothing.Beside ....“Wanna play truth or dare, Je?” I ask the
Always 16. Bryanna
To say last night was perfect is an understatement. To say it was ruined is another understatement. Because we’re talking about two different elements here, you know, two determining persons; Nate and Lincoln.Nate made it perfect because, hello, his kiss. And his presence. He made my heart flutters. He woke the butterflies in my belly and sent me flying high. Despite all, I have to lock Jerry in my room and I felt guilty about it. I still am.Meanwhile, Lincoln, well, his timing sucked like nothing else. Why did he have to arrive in the middle of the most amazing moment of my life? He made the situation freaking awkward for a while there. But ... if I have to admit something to myself, Jerry is in the best hand now. Lincoln took care of him as best as Adrian, if not better. You can say that they make co-parenting look so easy. Jerry is well-loved thanks to them.Ugh.After they left, Nate said he was no longer hungry so he ended up bringing the pizza home at my insistence. Soon, I was
Always 17. Bryanna
Nope, no, no, no. Not gonna happen.“What do you mean? Why should I ask for that asshole forgiveness?” I bombard my brother with questions. I soooo do not understand his line of thinking. What did I do? When did I do him wrong?To Lincoln of all people?My brother is getting crazy.“Just do it, Bry. Ask him,” he replies—which doesn’t answer any of my questions—with no elaboration which confusing me and it makes my ire go higher. And I really don’t want to go off on him so soon after I asked for his forgiveness.But, I said I want to be better. I shouldn’t be angry right now. God, change is so. Damn. Difficult.“I wish I could, but it’s not my story to tell,” Adrian continues without knowing my internal turbulence. “Sometimes we hurt people without realizing we were hurting them.”What the hell is he talking about? Come on, Bry, you’re changing for the better, remember? Deep inhale, hold it. One, two, three. Let it go. Good. Feel yourself getting calmer. Feel your anger leaving with ev
Always 18. Bryanna
“I think Tom will propose,” she blurts out when we are sitting side to side on her bedroom floor to literally transfer those new things into her suitcases, tags and all be damned.“Wait, what?” I faux-gasp and then roll my eyes. Come on, it is like, duh! “Of course, he will. He’s insane if he won’t,” I tell my best friend ...... who is fishing for more assurance when she asks, “Really?”“Really, Mo,” I emphasize, still folding a Balenciaga shirt that had cost her an arm. “You’re gorgeous. You’re fun, you’re talented. You’re good at what you did. And most importantly, you’re the best friend a girl could ask for. He will be lucky to have you for the rest of his life.”Unluckily, for me, that sentence bring my thought to a certain conversation about a certain man that I wouldn’t think of in a certain way.Nu-uh. Tris was wrong. No way in hell I want to be with that giant grump.No. Fucking. Way.Morwenna lets out a happy sigh. I am back to the now again. “Thank you.” She gives me the tig
Always 19. Bryanna
But, that dramatic tendency is what I miss so much from her when she’s away. They flew on Sunday and it’s only Wednesday and I already miss her like crazy. We hadn’t had any texts or calls. I don’t want to intrude her because I know she is having the best time of her life now. I can’t help but be happy for her. She and Tom really made for each other. Like, Nate and ... me?I giggle. Sneaking a glance to the phone beside my arm on the desk, I am proudly admit that I’m waiting for Nate’s text. We’ve been texting all the time since last weekend. And the texts? Oh my, don’t ask. I don’t want my assistant find me blushing in my office.Wink, wink, wink!The sound of my phone’s vibration on the glass makes my heart beats faster. I couldn’t grab it soon enough. Nate : *I can’t keep your lips out of my head*Reading his message, the room’s temperature suddenly climbs up couple of degrees. Why does it feel really hot in here? Nate : *I wonder if mine can meet them again soon*Okay, my body’
Always 20. Nathan
Fuck, she's ....I struggle to find a word that will describe her because I don't want to sound too sentimental and risking it look like something it isn't. Because it is. Not a thing.I know, I know. I still have her lips locks with mine and I'm still groping every curve I can reach of her sinful body. But, that doesn't mean I owe her anything, right? Despite the texting, swapping saliva, and touching, we were just playing, accompanying each other. Nothing serious, really.I like her, sure. I like her beauty, man, who didn't? Just look at that big hazel pools of hers, shine with such innocence. Like the world hadn't sinked its poisonous talons on her and showed her what the real world was all about.Maybe that's true, considering her perfect upbringing. The true American princess.And, hadn't you see those curves? Wrapped in that dark red dress? Clinging to her body on the right places, the flare compliments her fucking perfect hips.Come fucking on, don't tell me you don't want a p
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Always 48. Bryanna
What's happening to me?It is not until I hear the familiar voice of Nurse what's-her-name that my hard-beating heart slows down.Holy moly, Batman. I'm a mess."Oh, hey. You must be the baby daddy. Glad to see you," she greets with her cheery voice.Before I can turn on my back and swat that statements away to hell, Linc chimes in, "Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Lincoln."What in the actual hell? I sit up too fast and get myself a whiplash.Shit."Whoa, whoa, slow down, honey." The nurse suddenly stood beside me and holds me on the forearm. "Didn't think you'll be so excited to see me," she jests, trying to make it light.The giant prick snickers.I try to send a glare at him discreetly but fail miserably when Nurse—I glance at her tag—Laura eyes us back and forth. "Everything alright, honey?" she asks as she checks up on my vital."Yeah," I croak, "everything is fine.""I guess so." She writes something on the paper she brought with her. "And, please, lay low for a while, yeah? No inten
Always 47. Bryanna
What the hell is he doing here? Who do he think he is showing up in my room after ALL that he did? And, yeah, I really mean ALL OF IT.The nerve of this freaking prick."Sweetheart, is everything okay?"Dad's voice break through the fog of disdain that coated my brain, but, still, it takes a while for the question to truly register. I shift my eyes from the big, uninvited, and unwelcomed guy that now standing near my bed to my parents.And, it's not a surprise to see confusion painting their faces. Because of course they didn't know. And I don't want them to ever know about what had happened between me and the guy who they think of as their own son beside Adrian.Don't ask. I personally don't know why I'm still trying to keep this as a secret from them. Either I want to keep my name, or ....Don't. Don't go there.I shouldn't think like that way. I shouldn't think about it anymore.This is all his fault.But I can do nothing about it in front of mom and dad. "Yeah, yeah, Daddy. Everyth
Always 46. Lincoln
What the fuck did he just say?What. The. Fuck?"What the fuck, Linc? You're not listening?" protests Adrian.Yep, you see that right. The very best friend who had ghosted me for this past months is now drinking my liquor like it's fresh water and he's been stranded on the Sahara.I should have known when I saw his ass walking in from the door that he wasn't bearing any good news. I should have known when I saw him and he just waved his hand asking for a drink. I should have known.When the most stubborn prick on the planet shows up at your bar after punching your mug ugly, giving you silent treatment for months, you know something is wrong.And it really is. Terribly, fucking devastatingly wrong."Slow down, man. You want to knock yourself out or something?" I warn, reaching for the bottle he is gripping so hard like a lifeline.He swats my palm. Hard. Fuck, that hurts."Yeah, yeah. I wanna do that so baaad," he slurs. He then chuckles. "You realize how funny it was? I'm trying to kno
Always 45. Bryanna
I can't. I can't do this anymore.My body is so weak. There's nothing left to be released from my belly, but my throat don't get the memo and keeps on constricting. Dry heaving is sooo draining.With shaky legs, with the last strength I have in me, I drag my body out of the bathroom and reach for my phone on the bedside table.I can't do this alone.I can't if I want my baby safe.I can't if I want to safe me too.The call is still connecting.Come on, pick up. God, help me, God. Help. Please. Please. Please.She picks up on the third ring."Sweetie?" she asks, a little hesitant. Maybe she's questioning her own eyes. She doesn't believe I am calling her now. This is my fault. I did this to her. I stopped calling her months ago.God."Mama," I answer, as loud as I can. But, with the abused throat and the dehydration, I sound like a scratch on a sandpaper.Hearing this, her alarms picks up. "Sweetie, what's happening? Are you okay?" Panic colors her voice."No, Ma," I croak again."Oh my
Always 44. Bryanna
And suddenly out of nowhere Nate is everywhere.The internet is blowing with the news of this up and coming artist who will certainly make you lost your mind with his voice and his charm. They talked about his looks. His hypnotizing blue eyes, his lean but now muscular body. They talked about the aura he's giving out. They talked about his first single which successfully placed Nate on the chart, on people's attention. The other star starts to notice him too. They talked about that "mini tour" he did. They talked about his soon to be out first album. They talked about a real big all around the States tour after that. They talked about everything Nathaniel Moore. And they talked about all of his sexcapades. It seems like the rising star has already spread his wings in the women section. Then I see it. A photo of Nate kissing a woman in front of a building, a hotel to be exact. Bile rising in my throat. I'm gonna be sick. I run to the bathroom in my office and heaving to the toilet
Always 43. Bryanna
NowShe darts through the apartment and be in my room in a speed of light. "Tell me you listened to me," she demands as soon as she's here.I am leaning back against the head of the bed with pillows supporting my back and going through social media like nothing happened. I mean, nothing had happened if I consider what I did as nothing. Right?"Bry!" She snatches my phone away. "Hey!" I exclaim, sitting up. "I know you're upset but can you please not take it out on my phone?""Tell me you didn't do anything stupid," she insists. Her beautiful eyes penetrates me, searching for the truth from deep inside of me. She, like hundreds of times before, sees everything. "You did, didn't you?"Gotcha. But I keep my eyes on hers. "Why, Bry? Why? He's a jerk! You've been good these past months. You're better. You're happy again. Why?" I shrug. She's still waiting for my answer. She gets none of it. "That's it?" she gawks at my response. "I'm worrying myself sick about you and you just shrug
Always 42. Bryanna
Fuck. I'm pregnant. The last nine pregnancy tests on the sink said I am. The last one, the tenth out of ten I hurriedly bought this morning, now I'm holding in my trembling hand says the same.I'm fucking pregnant. How? Shit. I didn't just ask that. I know the how. I know the why. I know for sure the who. I just ... can't wrap my mind around it. Fuck. Shit.I touch my still flat stomach with shaking hands. I am pregnant. I have a baby in me. A baby is growing in my belly. What the fuck should I do? I really have to stop cussing. It's not good for the baby, is it? Fu—God! I'm having a baby? My feet feels weak. I totally should sit on this. Where do I sit? Here, on the bathroom floor? Oh, okay. I can't be thinking about all the germs in time like this. I really, really, really need to sit before my legs give out. Please, don't. I can't add falling into the things that will giving bad impact for the baby. Me freaking out right now is enough stress. I think. Right? RIGHT? O
Always 41. Bryanna
"Fuck, this is hard. Why is this so hard?" "Well, good morning to you too." I follow her into my apartment. It's only nine in Saturday morning. I should be sleeping, soundly, on my bed. Instead I'm waking up to this woman's hectic call telling me that she wants me to open the apartment door for her myself. She still have her key though. You need to know that. Get why I'm a tiny bit pissed at my best friend? My best friend who is all curled up on the couch now. And still whining. "Why, why, why?" I sit my sleepy butt on the coffee table. "What happened?" She whines some more. My brows slowly takes a hike to my forehead. Well, this is unusual. "Mo, what's going on?""There's nothing going on. Nothing happened," she chokes from behind her palms.Reaching out, I pull her hands with mine. Red rimming her wet eyes. Worry starts to color my face. "Then what is it?" She huffs, wipes her eyes, and sits up. Casting her gaze down on her lap, she explains, "I just got my period after a wee
Always 40. Bryanna
"I think I'm done." I wake up from the stupor I was in and put the milkshake back onto the table at last. Then I clean my hands with the napkin. Dump the dirty paper on my plate. At the very last, I paste the fakest smile on my face and direct it to Mo. She knows. She knows what I'm honestly asking of her. Get me out of here. She slaps the same fake smile as quick. However it is a little slanted, making her look like she's battling constipation right now. My smile morphs into something a bit more real. Only her. I internally shake my head. But, I still need to get out of this hell, like five seconds ago."Linc, can we get these boxed? I'm sorry, but suddenly I have this urge to eat at home where I can stretch my legs and watch some bad TV with my best friend. You know, enjoying the good life."What the heck? What is she talking about? Only her. Indeed, only MY best friend. "Okay." Lincoln's voice pictures his bewilderment perfectly. I still don't have the nerve to look at him.
