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79. The One Where The Nightmares Are Back
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Always is not Forever 80. The One Where He Tries
Reviving out of that horrible night, I steered into the kitchen to get a glass of water and clear the confusion in my mind. Two more weeks and his birthday would be there and my nightmares were nowhere on stop. Two weeks more and I would tie myself in a relationship that wouldn't matter if I couldn't be truthful to him.Taking a seat in the kitchen, I clutched my head in my hands, cursing at the past for taking me out of one person who loved me too much and would despise me if it ever got out.Dragging a shaky breath, I went to my room and stared at the pink teddy bear of my height and smiled at the memory stored in it."Can I untie it now?" I whined at my stupid boyfriend. The black cloth tied around my eyes was irritating me, the smell of Mehandi in my hands was sickening me.Even after a week, the smell hadn't faded nor it was ready to be gone."Hush, baby!" He dragged me by the shoulders. "I have a birthday surprise for you.""You already gave me a birthday gift.""That black jacke
Always is not Forever 81. The One Where I Promise to Face It
A hand rested on my waist, but I shrug it off and paid attention to my book placed in front of me. Again his hand came to my shoulder, and I slipped it off with my hands. After a minute, his lips came to my cheek and I groaned irritatedly. "Alina—" "Will you stop touching me?!" I shouted at Kabir, turning my head. "I'm trying to study, will you let me?" "Why are you getting so worked up?" He scoffed, standing up from the couch. "It has been four months since we last kissed each other. You don't even let me touch you anymore," His sentence ended in pain. "You move away whenever I am near." Because I was scared of what it would do to our relationship. I was scared you would leave me alone and I would imagine you further as him. Even when I wasn't sleeping, I felt a flicker of him in you. I was just trying to protect both of us. "Kabir, I'm not free," I forced out. "My book is released. I'm busy with it. Then there is college and studies. My life doesn't revolve around just kissing
Always is not Forever 82. The One Where I Get Ready
Parting the lid of my laptop, I entered the password and met the screen before clicking on the facetime and talk to her. Tomorrow was the day when I would reveal everything to Kabir and then hear the proposal he had for me, hear if he even wanted to go through it anymore.Crossing my legs on the bed, I connected to her, and within minutes, Dr. Sha's face became visible to me."How's everything, Alina?" She asked."Confused." I twisted my lips to her answer. "Tomorrow is Kabir's birthday." She nodded. "He's going to propose me on his birthday."The calm look on her face slipped for a second before she maintained it again. "That's fast," She answered, a bit of frown visible on her forehead as I toyed with the edge of my top. "Marriage means—""I know," I cut her off. "But he's ready to wait.""Did you talk to him?" She asked."Talk what? Tell him he's my nightmare? That how his girlfriend is scared of him? Then no, I haven't told my boyfriend that I imagine him as Rishi now and that I'm
Always is not Forever 83. The One Where I Never Get The Chance
Leaving on our floor, I walked to our apartment, and instead of ringing the bell, I used the key and entered.Staring into the distance, I frowned at the darkness and pressed the buttons at my side. All I saw was the emptiness of the apartment we used to live in. That was his preparation."Kabir, this preparation sucks!" I shouted. "Too much. What happened?" Laughing, I searched for him on the terrace but all I found was emptiness. "Kabir, where are you?" Scared, I went inside again but he was nowhere to be found. Running to his room, I found it was empty.Where was he?"Kabir, this is a sick joke. Where are you?" I shouted, angered laying at the words I threw at him.Annoyed, I took my phone out to find missed calls from him. I forgot turning it to normal. Quickly, I called him and he answered it. "Bookworm.""Where are you? If you're going to propose me on phone, I will slap you. I dressed up."He chuckled. "Sit down on the sofa.""But—""Sit down." A fear coursed through my veins f
Always is not Forever 84. The One Where She Dies
"Kabir, what are you doing?" I stared at the polythene in his hand. "And what is that?""You stop cooking." He placed the polythene in the slab, strolled forward to stand next to the stove and turned it off. "We have a chef now." Peering at him with a sheepish smile, I placed the knife out of my sight and paid my attention to his whining face. "Come with me.""But I need to cook. It's a stress reliever. I just completed a hectic project and assignment, and laptop screen is making me sick," I tried to argue but one look from him shushed all my protests. "I will still cook. Get out of the kitchen."He regarded me for a couple of seconds before placing his hand on the knife. "You want to be a housewife?""No. Why?""Cooking." He nodded at the fried potatoes. "I don't mind but—""Shut up. Cooking is a necessity." Scoffing at his confused face, I took the knife from his hands and started cutting the tomatoes. "If I love cooking, it makes me a housewife?" He twisted his lips at the corner,
Always is not Forever 85. The One Where I Remember Everything
Not bothered by Dhruv's words, I latched the car door open and sprinted into the house. Five hours since he conveyed to me about the news of the death. Five hours since he didn't pick his phone again whilst I tried to swallow another piece of a tragedy of my life."Papa!" I shouted in the mansion. "Papa!"He came out of his room, frown resided in his face as he faced me. "Alina."Seeing him, I ran and hugged him tightly as if it would keep the nightmares at bay, stop the horrifying dreams knocking at my door, halt the bad news stringing one after another without caring the state of my heart.Why was everything happening at once?"Is it true?" My voice came muffled in his chest."Yes. Do you want to see her body? It's supposed to be burned by five.""She can't go to burial grounds," Mom's voice heckled our talks. "She's not married.""Bullshit," Dad cursed. "You know I don't believe in such stuff. Let's go?" Dad promoted. I nodded in his chest, withdrew back a little and had no tears l
Always is not Forever 86. The One Where It's Too Much
"Alina, are you okay?" My therapist snapped her fingers in front of me. Reviving out of that day, I nodded and clutched my knees to the chest, rocking back and forth. "You dozed off there.""Why she did it?" I asked, staring into the distance. "She said she was like my mother. Which mother does that? Plan their own child rape?"It had been a week since I saw the blocked memories of mine, realized she knew it all the way and had helped him because of some money. It was always about money. Wasn't it? So my innocence was traded for money. My whole life was traded for money.It felt like I had been involved in prostitution.Which human do that to another? How could she see me like this every single day? She was worse than any person I had ever met. She was worse than him. At least, he showed his true colors. She stayed behind and let him do anything."Still traumatic?" She asked, and for the first time, I sensed pity in her voice."More than traumatic." I leaned my head on the back, stari
Always is not Forever 87. The One Where I Start Anew
***"Papa, I'm scared." Fiddling with my fingers, I peered at his neutral smile. "All of them are strangers."He unbuckled his seatbelt and twisted his body to see me. "And like you," he pointed out, grabbed the brown packet of Subway from my hands. "Do you want me to come?""What if I fall apart?" I stared down at my lap. "What if they thought I was lying? What if I'm not strong to face them?""Who says that?" Everyone. "Come on. I will take you. You're so scared." He chuckled."No!" I waved my hands at him to sit on his side of the car whilst I unbuckled my seat belt. "This is not my first day of school.""You hadn't cried on your first day of school." He laughed at my shocked behavior. "Everybody was crying but you were too happy. Your mom was confused. I was confused. You weren't scared of leaving us." He patted my cheek. "You were never scared. You cannot be scared now. I'm here. Your papa is here.""And he supports me?" I repeated.At least Kabir did one good thing. His leaving
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