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85. The One Where I Remember Everything
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2023-02-28 03:28:41Related chapters
Always is not Forever 86. The One Where It's Too Much
"Alina, are you okay?" My therapist snapped her fingers in front of me. Reviving out of that day, I nodded and clutched my knees to the chest, rocking back and forth. "You dozed off there.""Why she did it?" I asked, staring into the distance. "She said she was like my mother. Which mother does that? Plan their own child rape?"It had been a week since I saw the blocked memories of mine, realized she knew it all the way and had helped him because of some money. It was always about money. Wasn't it? So my innocence was traded for money. My whole life was traded for money.It felt like I had been involved in prostitution.Which human do that to another? How could she see me like this every single day? She was worse than any person I had ever met. She was worse than him. At least, he showed his true colors. She stayed behind and let him do anything."Still traumatic?" She asked, and for the first time, I sensed pity in her voice."More than traumatic." I leaned my head on the back, stari
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 87. The One Where I Start Anew
***"Papa, I'm scared." Fiddling with my fingers, I peered at his neutral smile. "All of them are strangers."He unbuckled his seatbelt and twisted his body to see me. "And like you," he pointed out, grabbed the brown packet of Subway from my hands. "Do you want me to come?""What if I fall apart?" I stared down at my lap. "What if they thought I was lying? What if I'm not strong to face them?""Who says that?" Everyone. "Come on. I will take you. You're so scared." He chuckled."No!" I waved my hands at him to sit on his side of the car whilst I unbuckled my seat belt. "This is not my first day of school.""You hadn't cried on your first day of school." He laughed at my shocked behavior. "Everybody was crying but you were too happy. Your mom was confused. I was confused. You weren't scared of leaving us." He patted my cheek. "You were never scared. You cannot be scared now. I'm here. Your papa is here.""And he supports me?" I repeated.At least Kabir did one good thing. His leaving
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 88. The One Where I get a Brother
I woke up with a startle, panting stared around the room."Alina." Someone settled next to me. Settling my gaze, I saw Dhruv, frown on his face."Water." Nodding, he passed me the glass of water and I gulped it in one go and gave it back to him. "Where am I?""Your room," He answered. "You fainted in the burial ground. Are you okay?" His urgent voice was avoided by me as I recalled what I had seen in my sleep.Was it truth or a lie of my own imagination? Had I started imagining Meena Aunty too as I had imagined Kabir? Why was my mind too fucked up?Wait a second.I prefer you don't give her. Leave us alone, will you? Please, think about what I said.Just something. You're very strong, Alina. Sometimes I'm scared I won't be able to protect you.Do you feel safe in this house?When our college ends, you'll be back here with your mom, sister and—Like you said, there are too many demons here.He knew. Kabir knew. That was why he had been too rude to her. It wasn't a fragment of my imagin
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 89. The One Where I See Everything
[ K A B I R ' S P O V ]"This ring?" I nodded at the ring jeweler was pointing at. It was the perfect ring for my bookworm, delicate and yet screamed the innocence she held in her face. "It's expensive."I arched my brows to him, curled my lips into a smirk. "Did I ask about the price?" He shook his head and took the princess cut ring out with a solitaire in the middle. Her previous warnings came back on how to not buy an expensive ring. Stupid girl. How could I choose something less for her?I dropped another ring I had stolen from her box in the dressing room in the morning. She would kill me if she heard I entered her room for stealing."Make it to this size.""You're buying it?" The jeweler asked, frowning at me. "Can you even—""I think I can see it myself." Rolling my eyes, I settled back on the seat and checked my phone. Tomorrow was my birthday and I had to lie to her that I was going to Coaching rather than wasting my time in buying a ring for her.What a boyfriend.Tomorr
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 90. The One Where I Relive the Memories
[ K A B I R ' S P O V ]Something tickled the length of my arm. Confused by the actions, I swirled my head to look at a toe brushing my arm. Quirking my lips with a smile, I said, "Baby, what are you doing?""Nothing," I could feel the smile on her face but her face was hidden by the book.Ignoring her attempts on my arm, I paid attention to the show playing in front of me. But again, a tickle flickered in my arm."Alina, stop it," I said, leaning back into the sofa and shrugged her foot off me. "Read.""I am," She answered. "An amazing plot twist."Stretching my neck, I felt her toe rubbing on the curve of my neck. She was getting back to the restaurant thing I had done a week ago. Twisting my lips, I caught her foot in my hand."Kabir, stop it," She scolded. "Let me read.""And this is reading?" I pinned my gaze at her covered face. "You're seducing me.""Me and seduce?" Her melodious laugh filled our apartment and she pulled her book down to her eyes. With a naughty glint in he
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 91. The One Where I Meet The Devil
"Why are you here?" I gritted out. "What you want?" Wrap your face in coldness, Kabir. Don't show anything to him."Kabir, long time no see," He leaned in his chair as if we were old acquaintance. "You're in my country. I should ask you the thing.""Do you want me to call securities and kick you out?" I buried my hands in the arms of my chair to not stand up and choke him to death.What a relish it would be to squeeze that life out of his mouth, hear him beg for his life like Alina begged him, see the dwindling breath, and glance at the cold skin.No nightmare.No pain."So eager." He wolfishly smiled. "I need some money.""And I'm not thinking of opening charity anytime soon. Get out." I paid attention to my work, eluding from the fact of his figure sitting in front of me.Kill him, Kabir.He ripped your bookworm apart in pieces you couldn't see. He ripped her away from you. He made her scared of you. He took away your everything from you.Show him the pain of what she was going thro
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 92. The One Where I am Alone
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]So he wasn't really coming back. Two weeks had passed away since I was in Bangalore, staying in my new apartment and forgetting I and Kabir used to live together. Two weeks since I had lost any hope for him when I didn't see him filling his admission form. Two weeks since I was waiting for him, but yet angry.What the hell was I doing? He must have moved on by now, got some American girl hanging to his arm. He must have even slept with her by now. Not every girl heckled his desires by saying no.He must have forgotten about me.Closing the book shut, I peered ahead as the professor continued with his lecture. Why was I even back to Bangalore? I could've stayed in Delhi, completed my graduation from there, but I hated Delhi. I would never go back to Delhi and make my stay in Bangalore. Dad would understand. He would see how Delhi held too many bitter memories with it.But did Bangalore held any good memories anymore? But I couldn't leave every city because of
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 93. The One Where I Torture
"I can't kill you. I'm not a killer." From the string of instruments placed beside me, I stared at the spiders. "You're scared of spiders. Alina told me unknowingly once." It was after her nightmare, I was trying to make her mood better and had suggested of one thing he was scared of. She had said spiders because whenever he used to see them, he screamed and we had laughed at his fear. Now I would really laugh. "You forgot she was your sister and she only talked to you. So, she must know you." Taking the jar, I opened the lid and poured all of the spiders above his head. He killed all my mercy the day he had given me the videos. He killed all the heart I had for people the day he threatened me with her name. Nobody touches my family and get past with it. His cries were a musical to my ears. "You don't touch my wife and think of getting away with it. I'm not a coward like her father. I don't believe in mercy. I love revenge." And I would get one hell of a revenge even if it couldn
Last Updated : 2023-02-28
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Always is not Forever 120. The One Where He Proposes
Rubbing my neck with the hand, I felt his presence on my back. "What is he doing here?"I turned to face him. "Kabir--""Alina, no." He cornered me, caging between his body by placing both of his hands on the counter table. "It's ten at the night.""He came. I couldn't say him to leave.""Or you could have said it's not ideal for him to come," He shot back, straining lines visible on his forehead. "You looked uncomfortable. Did he say something?"Nothing just confessed it to me and I had no idea why he thought he loved me when he knew nothing about me except the things I shared in the support group when he had no idea how needy I was, how I seek for attention."No," I whispered. "You got late.""Work." Pranit voice from the hall echoed in the kitchen and Kabir's eyes darkened. "I hate him. When I see him, I see how you said you loved him." But it was a lie. I was trying to hurt you, make you see how you leaving had impacted me. "I know you both have same past," He dragged a shaky brea
Always is not Forever 119. The One Where I Reject Him
"Come again?" Dr. Sha asked, her hands flying from right to left, hitting the ping pong ball with the red colored bat.Hitting with my bat, I tried to dodge her attempts to make me lose a point. "Why are we playing ping pong?""Don't you get bored staying in a room?""Kind of."But this wasn't what I had expected when she called for an outside meeting instead in her building's cabin. I had thought a café maybe, or someplace quiet but she had surprised by calling me to a club and assured nobody would come in this room."Your dad was ready to allow it.""His friend owns the club," I mumbled dryly, the sound of the hitting echoing in the four walls."And he loves you," She pointed out, smashing the ball and before I could hit, it flew from my side. "And you lost a point.""Funny," Grumbling, I walked to one of the corners, picked the ball and started the game again. The sweat had started forming on the forehead, my grip on the handle of the bat was losing, my wrists were aching. What was
Always is not Forever 118. The One Where I Face It At Last
Yawning, I closed my books and stretched my legs. Getting up from the bed, I walked out of the room to find something to eat. Switching on the lights, I found a note stuck to the refrigerator.Food is in the microwave. You were sleeping. Must be hard practice 😝 Ps. Heat and eat.Chuckling at her handmade emoji, I crumbled the note and threw it in the dustbin before opening the microwave and found the plate in it. She never forgot about me. Twitching my lips, I brought the plate out and grabbed a spoon.Cold food was better than hot food and she wouldn't understand that.She wouldn't understand why I had gone straight to the bed after coming back from college, she wouldn't understand how much it was killing to know that how deep secrets we both were holding.Before I could take a spoon, the kitchen walls were invaded by the screams.Alina.Dropping the spoon, I sprinted to her room, opened the gate and saw her struggling in her bed. She hadn't gotten any dreams since she had started s
Always is not Forever 117. The One Where He Knows
"I still think you shouldn't go," Kabir's voice brought me back to present.Shaking my head, I tried to remove the memory. It was before I had started imagining him as Rishi, it was before when we were happy and there used to nothing other than nightmares to trouble our relationship.Now we had to be careful. This careful was getting on my nerves."It's fine," I stated, changing the song on the stereo of the car."Here." He passed me his phone, connected it to the black aux cable. "Listen any you want."Taking his phone, I went through the songs, ignoring the EDMs he loved to hear and settled on something soft to not make him hyper."Now, Dhruv and you. You're traveling too much.""I'm not. He needs me. He's all alone, handling Ria." I curled on the seat. "She's too small. She needs to see people love her despite her father leaving for jobs. And Dhruv deserves a break.""I get you're worried. We all are." He dabbed his palm on the horn. "But look at yourself. You're squeezing your sch
Always is not Forever 116. The One Where I Miss
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]Gripping the pen tightly, I wrote down the explanation of the sonnet, completing the work that had been due last night. I blamed it on my over-worrying boyfriend who couldn't keep his mouth shut on why I was traveling this much. From past two months, I had been pacing back and forth between Bangalore and Delhi every weekend.He was getting angry.And I was getting pissed.Sighing, I placed the pen between the pages. Just two more lines, Alina and then you could go and shower to remove the aftermath of mediation and yoga."What you writing?" Hearing him, I levitated my head to stare at his face, but then, my gaze dropped to his chest.Where was his shirt? And why the hell wasn't I changing my gaze?Gulping, I paid attention to the white pages, overwritten by my hands. "Sonnet explanation. College work. You didn't go to GYM?""I'm taking a time off for a while," he answered, moving across the kitchen to grab a bowl for himself and picked the milk carton from m
Always is not Forever 115. The One Where Reality Is Out
***"You!" Shouting, I shut the door of her cabin. Jennifer looked up from the files. "In my cabin now."She raised her eyebrows in amusement and nodded. Who told her to tell lies to Alina? I got her teasing on me, I accepted it but feeding lies to her wasn't acceptable. I was an inch away from losing Alina again. Inch away to destroy all the progress we both had made after getting back together.Taking a deep breath, I entered my office and turned to face her. Yesterday, I had spent all my day to get new clothes before selling my old clothes and helping Alina with the packing.She was moving back with me. Good. I could see clearly how she was scared of me.Jennifer stepped in. "Now that's the Kabir I know. Angry and dominating one."Rolling my eyes, I nodded my head to the money placed on the table. "You're leaving India in next twenty-four hours. This is your pay. You're no longer my assistant.""I answer to your father, not to you." She crossed her arms over her chest. "He sent me.
Always is not Forever 114. The One Where The Past Begins
Staring ahead at the scene, I smiled and tapped my fingers on her arm. She turned with a smile and slipped her hand around my waist."I missed you.""You did?""Yup," She grinned. "Don't go again."Laughing lightly, I was about to reply when her figure disappeared from my arms and all I could see was the face of her house perched in front of me. What was I doing here? I was in our apartment, meeting her after a long time.A hand tugged on my shirt. Peering down, I stared at the girl."Kabir, save me." Confused by her statement, I wondered what she was talking about me. "Save me, Kabir," She cried, thumping her hand on my chest. "You promised you'll save me. Save me now."She took a run inside the house. Frowning a bit, I followed her inside, took the flight of stairs and entered the room I hadn't been into for past three years.Wasn't it burned? Wasn't it locked?My feet thumped on the old familiar room, looking for the small girl but, all I found was Alina standing at the corner, sta
Always is not Forever 113. The One Where We Solve
Presenting a smile, I stood up, took the clothes and strode to her bathroom. Shedding the rest of my clothes, I entered the shower and cleaned the disgusting things sticking to my body. When I checked for a shower gel and shampoo, I found the girly stuff and sighed. Looks like I would be smelling like her until the morning.As I was washing my hair, all the previous month we had spent together started biting my places. She was too distant from me. Her words seemed to be held and assessed carefully. Maybe moving in with me would change everything, maybe we would be different then, maybe we would back to our love life.But what about the insecurities? How would I solve them?"Kabir, are you done?" She knocked the door. "Was I too harsh? Is it not removing? Do you need my help?""Yes, it's not removing!" I shouted back, smirking. "Help me.""Tie a towel."Looking around the shower, I grabbed the towel from the upper shelve and tied it around my waist. "Done." My eyes remained glued to th
Always is not Forever 112. The One Where I Become A Joke
Alina's expression didn't change, her hands remained still at her side, her eyes narrowed at me."You're lying." Again, the same sentence. "She saw you without clothes.""I'm aware," I confessed. "Once she came in my penthouse. I was roaming in my briefs and she saw it." Seeing her expression, I added quickly, "I did yell at her for disturbing my privacy. I changed the code too. I didn't know she knew about it. She purchased the penthouse. I should've been aware.""But you kissed her." She clutched the arms of the chair tightly. And that was the reason I didn't want to tell her. "I can't stop imagining when you kissed her." She dragged a long, shaky breath before facing me, turmoil residing in her black eyes. "You wanted to forget me?" With reluctance, I nodded. "Was I that bad?""No, I just love you too much," I replied honestly. "Wouldn't you have done anything to forget me?""True." Standing on her toes, she trudged to my side, caught my face in her hands and inched it closer to he
