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45. The One Where I Repent
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2022-10-18 19:29:08Related chapters
Always is not Forever 46. The One Where I Have a Flashback
"Alina, sit." Meena Auntie pointed to the chair. "Everyone is coming.""You made my favorite?" I asked, grinning and for a while forgetting what had happened in my room an hour ago.She nodded, tapping my cheek and grinned back. "Rishi said me to make your special."The smile left my face. She noticed it, and before she could ask further, Misha entered the dining room, ruffled my hair and sat opposite to me."Di, sit next to me," I pleaded.She wouldn't touch me."I love this seat," she said. "Don't irritate me.""Please, I will sit next to you." Dropping from my seat, I walked to her sit and settled next to her. "I love sitting next to you."She laughed, nodded and started filling her plate. I pointed at the stuff I wanted on my plate and she helped me placing each of them.Soon, mom and masi came, sitting opposite to us.A hand rested on my thigh, slipping inside the skirt.Gulping, I skidded my gaze to look at the side and all the things of an hour ago came back. He didn't care to t
Last Updated : 2022-10-19Always is not Forever 47. The One Where I am Comforted
A relief look dawned on his face. "I will make up for it as soon I get better. Just don't trouble yourself anymore. Let the car go to hell. You're the most important person in my life." I gasped. "Come here." He caught my hand, pushing me forward to his face. "It has been three months since we're living together. I would've never asked you in the first place if you weren't important. I love my space too much like you do, but with you, it doesn't seem like interrupted, it feels complete."He tucked my hair behind my ear. "Tell me what's troubling you.""Kabir—""I love when you say my name." He hummed, smiling. "Switch on the AC. It's too warm here. Open the windows too. It's suffocating." Nodding, I stood up, turned on the AC, walked to the window and opened them, let the coolness of the plants waft inside the room. "Now tell what's troubling you."Without facing him, I caressed the one of the plants' petal and confessed, "I got replies from two publishers.""That's amazing.""Rejectio
Last Updated : 2022-10-20Always is not Forever 48. The One Where I Teach Him
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ] "Stop staring at her," I scowled at the sight of Kabir whose eyes were pinned to the girl sitting opposite to us.Who knew he would be like this? The anger in me was rising, not just because of his stare but how cheap it looked like. For past ten minutes, his eyes were glued to her and I hadn't noticed until she shifted uncomfortably.He broke his stare, shifted it to mine and said nothing."What are you doing?" I hissed. "We're in the airport and you're ogling at her. What has happened to you?"The Kabir I knew wasn't known for such behavior. I had never seen him pinning a girl with such a stare and to make them feel uncomfortable. What had gotten into him? Was this because I wouldn't let him touch me much? Was he thinking of having fun with someone else and then come to me, confessing the love he had for me?My anger increased and I hit his head with my book."Bookworm," He chuckled. "I wasn't staring at her.""You surely were. Look how uncomfortable she i
Last Updated : 2022-10-21Always is not Forever 49. The One Where I Shock My Dad
"Where is papa?" I asked Meena Auntie, passing both of my bags to one of the helpers.She turned, smiled and hugged me tightly. "Welcome back. Good thing you called this time.""Papa had said he would come, but he sent a driver," I complained. "I came with Kabir."I couldn't handle sitting with a stranger without preparing my mind for it. Whenever I would take a cab, I would be hitting in my mind to control yourself and don't get anxiety. Unexpected situations wore me down.Kabir had seen the distress on my face and suggested he would drop me home. I had insisted him to come inside but he was sleepy and wanted to go home. Reluctantly, I had nodded and bid him bye."He had work." I nodded tightly. Of course, he and his work. Breaking her grip on me, I stared at the floor. "Alina, your new room is ready.""Is it?"She nodded, smiling. "Your dad wanted to show you himself, but since he had work, he had to go. It was really important. He had said he would be back soon."I bit my lower lip,
Last Updated : 2022-11-06Always is not Forever 50. The One Where I Get It
[ K A B I R ' S P O V ]"What?" I asked for the tenth time to Nisha, who was grinning at me. "Why are you acting stupid? Mom, Nisha pagal ho gyi hai!""Shut up!" She kicked my ankle. "Tell me.""I'm not telling you what I bought for you. End of discussion." I paid attention back to my home, leaned my back against the tree and replied to the early birthday wishes.Where was Alina?She hadn't messaged me since I dropped her at her house. Did she forget my birthday? But she couldn't. She remembered Nisha's birthday, then, of course, she would've remembered mine as well."Our birthday is in ten minutes. Tell!" She insisted. "I won't tell you what I bought.""You're such an annoying twin. Get out.""I'm not a fan of sharing my birthday with you." She scowled. "I will tell you what Alina bought for you.""No need." I rolled my eyes at her. "She's buying me nothing. I forbid her.""What?"Facing my annoying twin, I smirked, "If she shows drama for accepting my gifts, I would do the same. I
Last Updated : 2022-11-07Always is not Forever 51. The One Where I Am The Unwanted Daughter
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]Someone knocked on my door—my new room door. Stopping the brushing of my hair, I opened the door to find Misha staring nervously at me.Stepping back, I let her enter the room."Do you need something?" I asked her. "Shouldn't you be getting ready?""Alina." She caught my hand and made me sit on the bed. "Don't think bad, but I need a favor from you.""Okay," I drawled out at her strange behavior.She was supposed to get ready to meet her boyfriend's parents who were coming today to our house to ask for her hand.I was supposed to get ready too."Bijoy's parents are orthodox. Please don't think it's something I want, but can you cover your arms?" Automatically, my gaze fell on my hands or the white scars standing prominently in the bright light of the day. "Please, Bijoy is very important for me. His parents won't get ready for the marriage if they see my little sister is suicidal."Was suicidal."I talked with mama, she's ready to hide your past as well. Yo
Last Updated : 2022-11-08Always is not Forever 52. The One Where I Am Lost
"Bookworm." Kabir caught my hand, dragged me to the sofa and made me sit as he crunched in front of me."What happened?" I asked, confused by his behavior of making me stop reading. I had my exam tomorrow and I still had to revise the poems for the last time."You." He frowned. "You aren't talking much.""We've our exams, Kabir. How can I talk?""You talk too much, bookworm. Is something troubling you?""No," I chuckled at his worry. "Kabir, I'm fine. Truly fine and happy. It just studies. I promise." To remove his worry, I kissed his forehead, then his right cheek, then his left cheek, halted at his nose and grinned. "See? You worry too much. You distract me from studies. That's why I wasn't talking much.""Promise me one thing?""What?" I played with his hair, and my distraction had started the moment I touched his soft hair."If something troubles you, my bookworm will come to me." I rolled my eyes at his promise. He worried too much without any valid reason. "I will always listen t
Last Updated : 2022-11-09Always is not Forever 53. The One Where I Tell The Truth
We retreated out of my room, jogged downstairs and halted at the sight of her father sitting in the hall. His sharp gaze cut to me and I stumbled back a bit.He scared me.But he didn't bear the hard look, but a tired. "Is she okay?" He asked me."I don't know," I replied. "I was going to check on her.""You both remain with her," Mom told me and Nisha. "Inform when she wakes up. She needs to eat."I nodded, withdrew to my parent's room, but as soon as I was inside, I caught Nisha's hand and whispered, "Take care of her. I will be back.""You're snooping on them?""Obvio. I need to know why she was crying in the first place." Rolling my eyes, I gave the last stare to Alina and left the room to hide behind the wall and listen to their talks."What you did was wrong," Dad whispered yelled at her dad. "Who deny their daughter in front of others? No surprise she was crying."What the fuck?"She only told us. I thought it was stressing her. I was trying to help her.""Nice help," Mom snorte
Last Updated : 2022-11-10
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Always is not Forever 120. The One Where He Proposes
Rubbing my neck with the hand, I felt his presence on my back. "What is he doing here?"I turned to face him. "Kabir--""Alina, no." He cornered me, caging between his body by placing both of his hands on the counter table. "It's ten at the night.""He came. I couldn't say him to leave.""Or you could have said it's not ideal for him to come," He shot back, straining lines visible on his forehead. "You looked uncomfortable. Did he say something?"Nothing just confessed it to me and I had no idea why he thought he loved me when he knew nothing about me except the things I shared in the support group when he had no idea how needy I was, how I seek for attention."No," I whispered. "You got late.""Work." Pranit voice from the hall echoed in the kitchen and Kabir's eyes darkened. "I hate him. When I see him, I see how you said you loved him." But it was a lie. I was trying to hurt you, make you see how you leaving had impacted me. "I know you both have same past," He dragged a shaky brea
Always is not Forever 119. The One Where I Reject Him
"Come again?" Dr. Sha asked, her hands flying from right to left, hitting the ping pong ball with the red colored bat.Hitting with my bat, I tried to dodge her attempts to make me lose a point. "Why are we playing ping pong?""Don't you get bored staying in a room?""Kind of."But this wasn't what I had expected when she called for an outside meeting instead in her building's cabin. I had thought a café maybe, or someplace quiet but she had surprised by calling me to a club and assured nobody would come in this room."Your dad was ready to allow it.""His friend owns the club," I mumbled dryly, the sound of the hitting echoing in the four walls."And he loves you," She pointed out, smashing the ball and before I could hit, it flew from my side. "And you lost a point.""Funny," Grumbling, I walked to one of the corners, picked the ball and started the game again. The sweat had started forming on the forehead, my grip on the handle of the bat was losing, my wrists were aching. What was
Always is not Forever 118. The One Where I Face It At Last
Yawning, I closed my books and stretched my legs. Getting up from the bed, I walked out of the room to find something to eat. Switching on the lights, I found a note stuck to the refrigerator.Food is in the microwave. You were sleeping. Must be hard practice 😝 Ps. Heat and eat.Chuckling at her handmade emoji, I crumbled the note and threw it in the dustbin before opening the microwave and found the plate in it. She never forgot about me. Twitching my lips, I brought the plate out and grabbed a spoon.Cold food was better than hot food and she wouldn't understand that.She wouldn't understand why I had gone straight to the bed after coming back from college, she wouldn't understand how much it was killing to know that how deep secrets we both were holding.Before I could take a spoon, the kitchen walls were invaded by the screams.Alina.Dropping the spoon, I sprinted to her room, opened the gate and saw her struggling in her bed. She hadn't gotten any dreams since she had started s
Always is not Forever 117. The One Where He Knows
"I still think you shouldn't go," Kabir's voice brought me back to present.Shaking my head, I tried to remove the memory. It was before I had started imagining him as Rishi, it was before when we were happy and there used to nothing other than nightmares to trouble our relationship.Now we had to be careful. This careful was getting on my nerves."It's fine," I stated, changing the song on the stereo of the car."Here." He passed me his phone, connected it to the black aux cable. "Listen any you want."Taking his phone, I went through the songs, ignoring the EDMs he loved to hear and settled on something soft to not make him hyper."Now, Dhruv and you. You're traveling too much.""I'm not. He needs me. He's all alone, handling Ria." I curled on the seat. "She's too small. She needs to see people love her despite her father leaving for jobs. And Dhruv deserves a break.""I get you're worried. We all are." He dabbed his palm on the horn. "But look at yourself. You're squeezing your sch
Always is not Forever 116. The One Where I Miss
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]Gripping the pen tightly, I wrote down the explanation of the sonnet, completing the work that had been due last night. I blamed it on my over-worrying boyfriend who couldn't keep his mouth shut on why I was traveling this much. From past two months, I had been pacing back and forth between Bangalore and Delhi every weekend.He was getting angry.And I was getting pissed.Sighing, I placed the pen between the pages. Just two more lines, Alina and then you could go and shower to remove the aftermath of mediation and yoga."What you writing?" Hearing him, I levitated my head to stare at his face, but then, my gaze dropped to his chest.Where was his shirt? And why the hell wasn't I changing my gaze?Gulping, I paid attention to the white pages, overwritten by my hands. "Sonnet explanation. College work. You didn't go to GYM?""I'm taking a time off for a while," he answered, moving across the kitchen to grab a bowl for himself and picked the milk carton from m
Always is not Forever 115. The One Where Reality Is Out
***"You!" Shouting, I shut the door of her cabin. Jennifer looked up from the files. "In my cabin now."She raised her eyebrows in amusement and nodded. Who told her to tell lies to Alina? I got her teasing on me, I accepted it but feeding lies to her wasn't acceptable. I was an inch away from losing Alina again. Inch away to destroy all the progress we both had made after getting back together.Taking a deep breath, I entered my office and turned to face her. Yesterday, I had spent all my day to get new clothes before selling my old clothes and helping Alina with the packing.She was moving back with me. Good. I could see clearly how she was scared of me.Jennifer stepped in. "Now that's the Kabir I know. Angry and dominating one."Rolling my eyes, I nodded my head to the money placed on the table. "You're leaving India in next twenty-four hours. This is your pay. You're no longer my assistant.""I answer to your father, not to you." She crossed her arms over her chest. "He sent me.
Always is not Forever 114. The One Where The Past Begins
Staring ahead at the scene, I smiled and tapped my fingers on her arm. She turned with a smile and slipped her hand around my waist."I missed you.""You did?""Yup," She grinned. "Don't go again."Laughing lightly, I was about to reply when her figure disappeared from my arms and all I could see was the face of her house perched in front of me. What was I doing here? I was in our apartment, meeting her after a long time.A hand tugged on my shirt. Peering down, I stared at the girl."Kabir, save me." Confused by her statement, I wondered what she was talking about me. "Save me, Kabir," She cried, thumping her hand on my chest. "You promised you'll save me. Save me now."She took a run inside the house. Frowning a bit, I followed her inside, took the flight of stairs and entered the room I hadn't been into for past three years.Wasn't it burned? Wasn't it locked?My feet thumped on the old familiar room, looking for the small girl but, all I found was Alina standing at the corner, sta
Always is not Forever 113. The One Where We Solve
Presenting a smile, I stood up, took the clothes and strode to her bathroom. Shedding the rest of my clothes, I entered the shower and cleaned the disgusting things sticking to my body. When I checked for a shower gel and shampoo, I found the girly stuff and sighed. Looks like I would be smelling like her until the morning.As I was washing my hair, all the previous month we had spent together started biting my places. She was too distant from me. Her words seemed to be held and assessed carefully. Maybe moving in with me would change everything, maybe we would be different then, maybe we would back to our love life.But what about the insecurities? How would I solve them?"Kabir, are you done?" She knocked the door. "Was I too harsh? Is it not removing? Do you need my help?""Yes, it's not removing!" I shouted back, smirking. "Help me.""Tie a towel."Looking around the shower, I grabbed the towel from the upper shelve and tied it around my waist. "Done." My eyes remained glued to th
Always is not Forever 112. The One Where I Become A Joke
Alina's expression didn't change, her hands remained still at her side, her eyes narrowed at me."You're lying." Again, the same sentence. "She saw you without clothes.""I'm aware," I confessed. "Once she came in my penthouse. I was roaming in my briefs and she saw it." Seeing her expression, I added quickly, "I did yell at her for disturbing my privacy. I changed the code too. I didn't know she knew about it. She purchased the penthouse. I should've been aware.""But you kissed her." She clutched the arms of the chair tightly. And that was the reason I didn't want to tell her. "I can't stop imagining when you kissed her." She dragged a long, shaky breath before facing me, turmoil residing in her black eyes. "You wanted to forget me?" With reluctance, I nodded. "Was I that bad?""No, I just love you too much," I replied honestly. "Wouldn't you have done anything to forget me?""True." Standing on her toes, she trudged to my side, caught my face in her hands and inched it closer to he
