I have never seen my husband like this. I have never seen him so broken. He has never allowed me to see him like that before, and I guess I could understand why. There was no need to hide behind a finger and say I was happy to see this side of him. No, this side of him was completely broken and still suffering, and I did not have what it takes to take it all away right now. I knew it. I think we both knew it. Maybe this was why he refused to show it to me for so long. I’m not sure where from, but it might be the maternal instincts that urge me to lean closer and kiss his forehead, cup his face and wipe away his hot tears. Tears continue to stream soundlessly as he stares up at me with round eyes, his face grimaced in a pained expression. “I am nothing but a weak man.” He whispers, his voice choked by his own emotions. “I am not fit to care for you or our -“ I immediately cover his lips with mine, stopping him from speaking any more nonsense. My hair falls like a curtain over his f
As I slowly start to come back to my senses, I realize that the silence I had been drowned in was not the exact same reality I woke up to. I hear the beeping of the heart monitor and the slight buzz of other medical equipment in the room.I can hear voices and even before I open my eyes, I am certain they are not in the same room as I was in. But they were right behind the door of my room, in the hallway. Screams and yells, barks and yelps, accusations and defenses that didn’t quite make sense right now. My eyes open slowly and I’m not shocked to find that I am in a hospital room. The light is dim and as I blik, trying to bring more focus in my eyes, a figure moves closer to me and waves a hand in front of my face.My eyes narrow slightly and I turn my head to the side. A dark haired man stands beside the bed. I can’t see features, but I don’t panic. Something told me I was safe. With a weak hand I reach up, to grab the shadowy figure and ask what happened, but I have no strength.Th
If God gives his strongest soldiers the mightiest fights, my God puts me in the middle of a raging war. I don’t even remember when was the last time I felt like I was being offered a break. When was the last time when I could breathe freely, at ease that things have settled in the best possible way for me?I can’t remember when was the last time I had a minute to fully feel at peace. I thought that finding my mate will bring me a piece of heaven in my life, but so far, everything was hell. Well, almost everything. I would be considered nothing but a liar and a sinner if I dared say I did not feel happiness by her side. She had brought a shining sun in my life, but it seemed that my God had taken it upon themselves to stifle the light of the sun and make it burn out too early.As My mate grows anxious and angry, I feel like I don’t know her anymore. It’s almost as if she was not the same person anymore. I recognize the pattern. The frenzy, the anger and fear she had displayed now,I’ve
A few days pass by in such a slow painful rhythm that I feel like I have been waiting for centuries. Madelaime refused to see me. The only person going in and out of her room was her doctor right now and maybe the nurse.After she woke up and found her mother waiting for her to wake up, she refused to see anyone else anymore. It was almost as if she had decided to self isolate and not allow anyone near her. I'm not sure what Mellisa told her, because the old vixen refused to talk to me too. She was avoiding me and she had made sure to make it clear that me and her had no more need to come in contact.What has she done to my mate, I wasn't sure. I was sure that Mrs. Kassimir knew very well what was going on. She was one of their kind, old as time and with extended knowledge on the matter. That's why I had insisted on her taking care of my mate. She must have seen at least a couple of cases similar to ours, right?I wasn't sure because she kept our talks shirt and professional. Beside t
I barely get to open my mouth when the flatlining sound of the heart monitor fills the hallway. Everything inside of me goes berserk and I turn on my heels, Demetri jumps out of his seat and we storm into the room, eyes wide, heart frenzied and ignoring my panicky thoughts. I stumble forward into the room and I find myself tackled by my mate, the very mate that didn't even want to look at me earlier. The way she jumps into my arms makes my heart almost stop beating. My knees weaken and for a brief moment I am not sure I can support her. That until the sound of the flat lining of the monitor is drowned by the uncontrolled sobbing of my mate. I somehow find all my strength again, my arms going under hers, supporting her as she leans all her weight into my arms.The nurses storm inside of the room as well and before I know it, the room is overcrowded and I feel like I am about to break completely. Maddelaine doesn't stop crying, while she mutters words I can't quite make out right now,
Silence fills the room in a heavy cloud that makes me feel a little uneasy. Killian is still kneeling by the couch, his hand on my belly. I feel odd. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because I know how much harm I have done to him, and how much pain he must have been through.I knew damn well I was nothing but a bitch for a whole entire month, while he had worked his ass off to finish remodeling this home for us. For me, for our babies, for us as a family. I knew all this and yet, I could not bring myself to genuinely apologize. It would not have been enough anyway, so why bother, right? Seeing him this patient, this calm in the middle of the storm, this gentle and genuinely entranced by the idea of being a father, made /her/ rethink quite a handful of things that were now a bit uncomfortable to think about./Trusting him could be a mistake…/ Trusting him could also be the besst thing we could do in this lifetime./His kind -/He can’t erase or delete from history what his kind has don
It’s been long enough for things to have settled, but they haven’t. I can still tell she is not very comfortable around me. And I am not sure if it was me or the pregnancy that made her feel the need to put distance between us.I had hoped that once home, we would spend more time together, but Madelaine still finds ways to put the wall right back up as soon as she realizes she has been lowering her guard. From the fact that we were not even sharing the same room anymore, to that of going the extra mile and having her mother come to visit often enough that I had the feeling she was living here now too.The amount of anger and frustration I felt was not something I could put into words. My mate chose to stay away from me on purpose. What did I do wrong?! I needed answers!While Madelaine was down for a nap, Mellisa was reading in the little study room that Madelaine transformed into a little nest, crowded with books and various art supplies. I knock on the door and enter before I am tol
I swallow back the lump that rises and block my throat as I watch her stroll around the room. Somehow, she still seems half asleep and not so very present. She stops in front of one of the bigger canvases and stares at it blankly. There’s a bunch of peonies painted in a rather messy and a huge mess of colors that makes it a bit painful to look at. She is at an arm's length, but if I take one step forward, she is close enough that I could pull her towards me. Something tells me I shouldn’t do that though. She seems so different from the woman I met last autumn, while still being the exact same. It was a strange contradiction I did not understand yet.“If you have a problem with me, you should not go around my back and aim for my mother.” She speaks in a low voice , her eyes cutting to me. Her face is stern, cold and adamant like a sword ready to cut. “Our problems should be kept private, don’t you think?” She adds and her flat voice makes me uneasy.My brows narrow and as she turns