Alpha Kaden’s torture part two... "No!" I weakly cry out. By this time, my pants are already off. He roughly penetrates me with his fingers, causing me immense pain as he moves rapidly and violently. "Sean was right, you are tight, so beautiful," he says as he adds more fingers, while I scream. My screams must have become loud enough that he covers my mouth with his hand. He removes his hands from inside me and proceeds to remove his trousers, still holding me down so I can't escape. I see his genitals, and my eyes widen. I don't want this. I want death, but not this kind of pain before I die. I wanted to leave this world with my dignity intact, the only thing I've been able to keep all these years. "Please, Williams," I beg as tears stream down my face. Just as I feel his genitals at the entrance, the door suddenly opens, falling to the ground, and an angry, half-transformed wolf emerges, throwing William away from me. "How dare you?" Alpha Kaden growls, shaking violently. "Sh
A beginning I had not hoped for . . . The ride felt incredibly slow and lengthy, and I wondered how far the Blood-sun pack actually was. The Blood-sun pack was the pack of the north, respected and feared for their numbers and strength. I had never been to any other pack apart from my home pack since the day I was born, and I never imagined I would. Even though there was a possibility of my mate belonging to another pack, I had always imagined I would be mated to a pack warrior if it had not been for William being my mate. I had hoped my pack warrior mate would choose to stay with me. Selfish, I know, but I was young and did not want to imagine a life away from my pack and my loved ones. Well... how life has changed. In fact, I was living without my pack. The loved ones I had once feared to depart from were the first to depart from me. I was slowly taking another step in the journey of my life. It was a new beginning, though not the beginning I had hoped for. I had to see it thro
The Change . . . James led me to a room in the pack house, and when we entered, he kindly took the time to explain everything I needed to know about my stay there. He excused himself gently, but I couldn't help but notice the look of pity on his face as he closed the bedroom door. The sound of the door closing was the final blow, and the tears I had been holding back for so long finally descended. I collapsed on the floor of the room, hugging myself as I cried, not caring if anyone heard me as they passed by my door. Sleep eluded me, no matter how many times I tried to force myself into it. The bed was comfortable, even soft. The room itself was simple and welcoming. None of these factors were the cause of my sleeplessness. I was restless and anxious. My wolf was stirring inside of me, eager to come out, but I was afraid. I feared the pain that would accompany the transformation. It would be like the first time all over again. How was I going to deal with this? My father had b
The Silence part one . . . Nothingness has several definitions, one, "it was the state or condition of being nothing; nonexistence"· Two, "it is the absence of consciousness or life"· Three, "it is complete insignificance or worthlessness". I have seen and felt all three all at once since the past three years but there was another definition that I have not yet felt, nothingness as an egoless state of being in which one fully realizes one's own small part in the cosmos. "I had yet to discover the purpose of my entire existence in this world. Or maybe I had. Was my purpose in this world to suffer? To mourn and never be happy? Then I was truly nothing. The beeping sound ringing in my ears brought me back to the light. I carefully opened my eyes to get accustomed to the intensity of light in the room. I could hear voices around me, but I was yet to discern which belonged to whom. "What is wrong with her?" This was Kaden's voice. I was surprised that his voice sounded worried. Was
The Silence part two ... "Louisiana!" Kaden boomed in his Alpha's tone, but his voice did nothing to me. Maybe I had indeed gone mad. If Hannah wasn't going to help me, I would find another way. There are millions of ways to die, aren't there? Maybe Kaden would be willing to help me, since he hated me so much. I released Hannah's coat and focused my attention on Kaden. "You don't want me, you hate me. Do it! Kill me! Spare me from this pain!" I cried. Kaden stared at me, dumbfounded. "Hannah, leave!" Kaden ordered. "But Alpha—" Hannah hesitated, but Kaden cut her off. "Now!" he yelled, and Hannah scurried out of the room. Then there were just the two of us. "Please, Alpha, please," I cried in desperation. "I can't," he said in a surprisingly calm voice. "Why? I am your torture, a reminder of your pain. I am the daughter of the man who killed your mate, your pup. I do not deserve mercy. Kill me!" "I can't," he responded again. I was disappointed. Why wouldn't he free me? Di
. Life in the Pack part one . . . I have had time to think while I lay on the hospital bed. It was wrong to wish for death. I may hate my situation, but I still have time, and nothing lasts forever. As hard as it might be, I will make a life in the pack—a quiet life. Here, I might never be respected or loved, but I am not in a cage, and I can be happy by myself. I just have to make sure my wolf does not die. It will be her and me against the world. Kaden has not returned to my room since that day, but there are two bulky wolves mounted at the door, making sure I don't harm myself. I have never actually harmed myself, despite the torture I faced in my former pack. This time, the possibility of truly losing my wolf shook me. I don't need a doctor to tell me that I need therapy, but how am I going to get it when I am still trapped in this pack? Werewolf mental health is not exactly treated as a thing in my world. Werewolves are naturally unpredictable, feral, and quick to anger, ex
Life in the pack part two... "It is the only way, Alpha," Hannah said, as if pleading on my behalf. Was my life really worth saving to her? Or was it her nature and her career field that made her this way? Anytime now, Kaden would reject the idea, and he would say no. I closed my eyes, waiting for the word to come out. I waited a few seconds, but the words I had expected never came. Instead, its opposite did. "Yes, I will do it," he sounded, and it was like I was suddenly drenched with water. My eyes shot open immediately. "What?" I was deeply confused. Why was he doing this? "How soon do we get this done?" Kaden asked Hannah. "Soonest, Alpha. The full moon is in two days, and the shift would come naturally. You both must have been marked and mated before that time if we are going to save her wolf and her life," Hannah answered. "We will get it done tonight," Kaden announced, like it was the simplest thing to say in the world. Does my word not even matter in this? It is my ow
Deity Forbids . . . I hadn't realized I had fallen asleep until there was a knock on the door of the room. I rose up, realizing that I was still naked and it was morning. How had I slept for so long? I wrapped the linens around my body, but not without noticing the bloodstain on the sheets, the proof of my lost virtue. I carefully hid it as I watched Kaden enter the room. He closed the door and stood by it, staring at me. "I'm sorry," he apologized. I felt the guilt seep through the bond for a moment before it faded away. He was locking me out of his mind, and I couldn't even think of peeking into his mind in the first place. I nodded in acknowledgment of his apology. The deed was already done, and there was no need to cry over spilled milk. I had done enough crying last night. As a matter of fact, I had done a lot of crying since I arrived at this pack. I got up from the bed, ignoring the fact that his gaze was still fixed on me, making sure that the linens were wrapped around