A.N *Trigger warning- suicidal thoughts ahead. Meg Our alpha is my mate! I know it to be true just as the life growing inside me. I honestly do not think it is wishful thinking on my part as Blue puts it. But why don’t I feel this fierceness that everyone talks about? I just feel- disgust- for him- for me... Jax had asked me if I felt any type of joy at the sight of the alpha. My answer was no. “Hmm, well Juliet, had he really been your mate you would know because when you do the –er- stuff,” he made a motion of a circle with one hand and stuck his index finger from his other hand inside the centre. The understood sign for s*x. “You would feel the fulfilment. Like my mother said when the mate-bond was filled, for her and my father, nothing made sense and yet everything did. She would have given her life in a heartbeat for him- above all else. Even me. And my father for her.” His tone had gone quiet. “And when she lost my father, she almost died too. Do you feel that way?” I had
Alpha Soren’s POV- finally eh... Logan was seething inside me and even though I had shut him off, he was so strong that I could still feel his edging. Cursing silently that I wish I could do it permanently. I could have felt his maniac trembling as if he was about to go over the edge and if he did, that then all shit’s gonna break loose. My wolf had nearly zero chill but it’s normal for my status as alpha. Before I was alpha, I did worry that he was too playful. My heart is burdened.I insulted my mate and sent her away quickly because I could not hold Logan back for much longer. But I am fuming myself and a little over an hour later, when he calls me a festering putrid pile of cow dung, I sent for Beth who was already downstairs.While we waited for her arrival, I gave him a lesson on the importance of cows and their waste to which he responded with more hateful and spiteful words. Both of us talking over each other, shouting inside my head, so loudly, that I gave myself a headache
Alpha Soren When would this night end?Logan is pacing. Growling low and snarling. His body's tension is pissing me off. Ears flattened and eyes narrow and focused. Now and then his ears perk up.It was for the betterment of the pack, I tell him and his hackles raised.Gosh, I've had quite a few nights similar to this when Meg plagues my mind and I couldn't get sleep. They were rather long nights and sometimes my hands didn't work so I called in Beth and she eased me, but it only worked sometimes. Tonight it had not.I, as an alpha, an omega cannot be my mate. She would weaken the pack... My Luna is supposed to compliment me and our bond would make me stronger. This is how packs become strong. A weak wolf is a liability, and I cannot have that in my pack for it is the pack that would suffer. An omega carries no strengths. Logan, now thinks she is perfect for us but what does he know? He works on instinct and his instinct will not save the pack- he is primal. Kill everything in his
Alpha SorenLogan whines inside my head and I gritted my teeth, ignoring him. Moving my hand faster over my stiffness, I frown deeply a stifled moan through my clenched teeth as I replay what she feels like inside my mind. Her softness. Her folds- the little whimpers she makes. The warm water from the shower sprinkles over me and I wonder what taking Meg in here would feel like. With her face flattened against the tiled wall, one of her hands stretching out behind her, to my back, her long nails- she doesn’t have long nails, okay, her regular short nails- geez her hands then on my wet skin, a sign of encouragement as I pounded into her from behind. Her soft wet buttocks...I groan. My forehead presses against the wet tiles as my hand movements quicken. Ah- yes. Sweet release. I collapsed against the wet tiles and spilt my juices out, tears flowing down my eyes. Logan turns his head, shaking it. He thinks he is too full of class to stoop so low as to please
Several Years LaterMeg “Mummy, can I ask you something? I promise it’s crucial.” Ah, another new word she discovered today. I smiled proudly. The four-year-old girl, with shiny coppery eyes- so much like her father's, looks up at me as we step onto the massive stoned pathway, to our house, where we live an everyday normal human mundane life. I encourage her probing, as I never had anyone to ask my million questions to, growing up. I vowed my child would never have a life like mine where just a stare alone could shut up the thoughts inside your head. I’d only just collected her from Marion, today’s scheduled parent for our kindergarten pickup and drop-offs. Mondays are my day, which was yesterday. “Kenzie, you can ask me anything, baby,” I assure her as we climb up the three steps and onto our porch. Our house is built very sleepy suburb-like. It is the dream home of every new couple who wishes to raise their kids in a happy safe environment. Clean air and amusement parks within
Meg Most of my life- I dare say, I have been unhappy. I felt sort of numb and misplaced somewhat until Jax pulled me out of the frigid, cold waters, of the Mount White Stone River. The first thought that came to me was the little one in my tummy. Womb- I'd learnt this word when I joined the maternal clinical afterwards. I’d also learnt that you didn’t check babies by months while you carried them but by weeks. Forty weeks is each approximate calculation for the due date- which could go either way. But we aren’t talking about my pre-natal time, are we? The doctors told me that jumping into the water was nothing to fret over because I survived. His joke did not make me laugh as he had intended. Then he went on to adjust his glasses, telling me that a scarily large number of mothers go through a depression stage; either pre- or post-pregnancy when I had made a scene in the emergency ward about checking to see if my baby was still alive. He hadn’t known what I mean. I’d meant my trans
Alpha Soren To say I am in a bad mood is an understatement. My pack is weak. Not totally but weaker than how we used to be. Previously, we were known as one of the strongest packs, even though we weren't that massive in numbers. 9,273. Three funerals we’ve had already in the last month alone and today is the fourth. And in the past year; twenty-one. Someone is out to get us- or should I say- take us out. While I have my eyes on the newcomers, I cannot lay blame on them when I haven’t seen any movement by them that I would regard as suspicious. They seem to have adapted well into my pack. But looks can be deceiving, I know. Sterned face, I stare at the Mohagany casket- not coffin. I’ve been to so many funerals that I have learnt the difference between caskets and coffins. how about that? A casket usually implies a rectangular- four-sided container with a hinged lid, whereas coffins have six sides to them, wider at the shoulder part and tapers tinner to the feet area, with a remov
Alpha Soren “F*cking Christ!” I grumble when a sharp knock is heard on my door, almost deafening me. I know it’s most likely a regular knock but after a night of drinking...well you know the deal. It’s Will. He barges in, fresh looking considering how I feel at the moment and glares down at my foetal form on my bed. “This crap has got to stop, Soren. The pack is murmuring amongst themselves about their luna.” He got straight to the point. It’s too early in the morning for this... Logan is a bit groggy as well but at the mention of luna, he clears his mind. Of course, the pack is concerned about me. They might overthrow me if it were possible to form a rebellion or if anyone would challenge me for my alpha spot. An alpha without a luna at my age, twenty-eight, is almost unheard of. Sure, it happens but very rarely and most times it’s because the luna had died. In that scenario, it’s normal for an alpha to be without his moon mate and sometimes he would get a second chance
Megan’s POV Breathing out harshly, I stand at the window of the small office in Jax’s house, staring out at the woods that bordered the pack lands in the near distance. The morning sun filtered through the trees, casting long shadows on the ground, but I couldn’t focus on the beauty of it. My mind is elsewhere- on Soren, on Mackenzie, and on the pack that was slowly falling apart. On the three young boys that were plagued with fevers for the past two nights and what would happen to them after I left. Jax said it was normal for boys to get fevers that way but still I worried. The k*llings that were happening to the pack members and humans. The fact that Gail thought it was related to her own pack being slaughtered years back. But most importantly on Mackenzie and Soren. She needed her father and he, his daughter. Red is very stubborn and thinks Soren deserves nothing but my scorn and only softened because Soren being hurt meant her mate Logan being hurt as well. Will, had requested
Alpha Soren's POV I paced the length of my office, my steps heavy, the tension rolling off me in waves. I’d spent my life protecting this pack- giving it my soul and it cost me my woman and my child! My fists clenched at my sides, and I could feel the frustration coursing through my veins, tightening my chest. Logan was almost a ghost of his former self. He barely stirred today, a faint shadow where there used to be power. He was slipping away. Five days is how long I have not seen Megan. Red has somehow blocked Logan and he has not been the same since. Logan is tearing me apart from the inside. It’s been five days since I last saw her, and the bond- what little of it I could still feel, is nearly gone. Her doing, of course. She has that power over me, over us. The pain is relentless, a constant throb in my chest that makes it hard to breathe. Logan can’t reach Red, can’t feel her, and it’s driving him mad. He’d clawed at me, howling in my head, begging to break free and find her
Alpha Soren’s POV Her words hung in the air, colder than any wind that’s ever brushed over me. It could give the Arctic winds competition ‘I'll break your arm.’ The threat cut deeper than it should have. Meg's violet eyes, once soft and filled with something I didn’t deserve, were now hardened with the same venom she reserved for rogues. She wasn’t bluffing. I knew that, but it was the way she stood between me and him-like he was something worth protecting. It made my blood boil. I should’ve ripped his throat out the second he stood in my way. And as if sensing Logan’s desperation to break free and slice his claws across the delta’s neck, Will rushes everyone out, leaving Megan and I in privacy. Meg, standing there like I wasn’t even her Alpha anymore. The worst part was, maybe I wasn’t. She was different now. Stronger. Surer of herself than I’d ever seen her. And it made me realize just how much I had lost. She was everything any alpha would want and more too
Alpha SorenFinally, it’s 10 am and with it, the dreaded meeting. Beta and two gammas are outside with another person- possibly the lab tech. Taking two minutes outside the door to appreciate Meg's scent, I bask in it. It's been too long without her.I was barely holding it together when I walked into the room, finding Meg and the delta already waiting- the bipolar in me again. The tension was thick, almost suffocating. Logan growls. Megan looked as though she hadn’t slept either, with dark circles under her eyes. The delta was seated by her side, a silent but steady presence. The sight of him fuelled my anger, and I had to fight to keep my wolf in check. A torrent of emotion surges through me. “We need to talk,” Megan began, her voice strained. “About Mackenzie.” Huh, I figured Logan would have done the ‘run and tell’ his mate I knew already being as she convinced him to hold himself in check and to try to contain me as well. Red was powerful enough to separate my wolf from me in
Alpha SorenThe delta’s child tugged on my sleeve bringing me out of my shock mode and I asked her who told her that while I scanned the fighters behind her, a deep frown setting up house, on my forehead. The pack was full of malicious wolves and I will punish them. Mocking me as alpha is forbidden. And they were poking fun at me because of my luna playing house with another man’s baby. I knew it was only a matter of time before word got out but I was hoping Meg would have seen reason and forgiven me before that happened. Thus, coming home to take her place in my bed. “Nobody silly. I ask you.” She points to me with her tiny finger. “Mummy said my daddy is strong and brave. She say he special.” She was cute in the way she spoke missing out words- and she just saved the usual pack gossipers from a cruel whipping. Officially introducing myself to her, I lowered myself to converse better with her throwing her head back, showing she was tired of looking up. Plus, the loud breath she
Alpha SorenThe Moon Goddess must truly despise me. Why else would she punish me so? I was barely holding on, teetering on the edge of my sanity. It had been weeks since I last saw Meg. Weeks of torture that only the Moon Goddess herself could have devised. Logan was growing weaker with every passing day. The absence of his mate was like a slow, excruciating death. And I felt every bit of it. Even if I had hoped to gather the strength to reject Meg, to sever the bond that only brought pain- at my strongest, I was powerless when it came to Megan. Both my wolf and I would accept death rather than live without our mate. I was pacing my office- I should not and save my strength but I am restless and agitated. A knock on the door pulled me from my spiralling thoughts. “Come in,” I barked, not in the mood for interruptions, though anything was better than this maddening speculation. when Beta burst through the door, his face flushed with urgency. “Alpha, they’ve arrived,” Will said, his
Little MackenzieI like the park. It’s big, with lots of grass and trees, and I can run so fast! I can hear the birds singing in the trees and the wind whooshing past my ears when I run. Today, I'm playing with the other kids from the wolf pack. My shoes get all muddy, but Mummy says it’s okay because they’re just shoes. There’s this boy named Benjamin, and he’s kind of fun. He’s got a funny laugh that makes me giggle, and we run around and around until we fall into the grass, all out of breath. Beth, his mom, says I should be nice to him because we’re gonna be friends forever. I wonder if that means we’ll get married one day. Maybe. Mummy says she and Uncle Jax grew up together here, just like me and Benjamin. They were friends when they were small, and now they’re big and still friends. So, maybe I’ll marry Benjamin when we’re big, but only if he stops pulling my hair. Maybe I’ll just have him as my boyfriend. Gross. There’s a lot of people at the park today, grown-ups too. I l
JaxAfter getting a very tired Mackenzie inside and settled- poor child so confused by everything- we found ourselves alone, the weight of the impending confrontation pressing down on us. Meg stood by the only open window in the entire house- because it faced the forest and not the pack where someone could see it by chance- staring out at the dimly moonlit forest beyond, her shoulders tense with her unspoken worry. But I know her. Walking up behind her, I wrap my arms around her tiny waist, pulling her close. I kiss the nape of her neck and she sighs leaning back against my chest, letting go of a shaky breath, and relaxing against me, the tension slowly melting away as I hold her. “Jax,” she began, her voice barely above a whisper, “what if he doesn’t accept it? What if he tries to take her from me?” He can't. I love that little girl as if she were my own flesh and blood. It nearly breaks my heart to hear the fear in her tiny voice and to know this is what has been corroding her b
JaxIt’s been almost a month since we should have gone back to White Mountain Valley, but I kept pushing it off. Meg needed more time, and honestly, so did I. This wasn’t just about going back to the pack; it was about reintroducing Mackenzie to Soren- this time as his daughter. I knew it would be a bombshell, one that would change everything, and Meg wasn’t ready to face that on her own. She said she couldn’t do it without me, and I couldn’t leave her to handle it alone. Meg had been acting different these past few weeks. Clingy, maybe a little sad too. It was like she could feel the pull of the mate bond with Soren growing stronger as we got closer to the day we’d have to go back. I hated seeing her like this, torn between two men, and I hated even more that she thought I was trying to push her back to him. It wasn’t true, but the mate bond is a powerful thing, and it was eating at her, making her question everything. One night, just over a week ago, she broke down. We were sittin