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2024-10-29 19:42:56FALLON
It sucks that I’m assigned to patrol the night we get back. The bus doesn’t arrive back at the squad complex until dusk, so I basically have to hop off and report. I’m a little panicked when I get off the bus and see that the patrols are already grouping up- I don’t want to be late and keep them waiting.
I feel a little bit of relief when I see Vienna getting off of her bus because at least I won’t be the only one holding up our patrol. I head Vienna’s way and I’m intercepted by Connor, who offers to take our bags in to the barracks for us so we can head right over to our group. Such a nice guy.
Vienna and I hustle over to where Brock and Casey are standing, and I notice that Brock looks a little irritated for being kept waiting. Then again, the guy has never been very warm and fuzzy.
“Ready?” he asks as we approach, and Vienna and I both mumble in t
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FALLON News of the border breach spreads like wildfire through the squad complex the next morning. They never found the guy, but they’ve concluded that he was a rogue based upon his scent and the determination that he was traveling alone for the miles that they tracked him. That should be some consolation, but I’ve still got a sick feeling about the whole thing since I was the one that had the misfortune to stumble upon him. I can’t stew about it for long, though, because as soon as we get out onto the field for morning session, I see that the giant whiteboard is back. Rankings time. Only Gray and Theo are on the field today, standing in front of the whiteboard with their arms folded across their chests like bouncers at a club. Big, muscly, super hot bouncers… Not even Gray’s sexy physique can hold my attention, though- not when that whiteboard behind him is basically going to spell out my future. I’ve
Alpha Gray 24
FALLON As soon as I walk into the dining hall that evening, the smell of grilled chicken hits my nose and I start salivating. I worked up a hell of an appetite today training with Judd as my partner. I’m still glad I’m partnered with him, but fighting opposite him is way more challenging than sparring with Olly was. If my exhaustion and aching muscles are any indication, I’ve gotta step it up again if I want to hold my place in the rankings. I’m still on cloud nine about the rankings. My hard work is finally paying off and the alphas are actually recognizing what I can do, what I’ve worked so hard for. I didn’t train every weeknight for the past three years to get cut from training camp; I did it because I want to be on the squad more than anything. As I feel myself getting closer to making that dream a reality, nothing can bring me down. Except maybe Hannah. She’s been nasty in every interaction I’ve had with her toda
Alpha Gray 25
FALLON Gray’s words hit me like a ton of bricks, knocking all of the air out of me. He kicked me out?! My eyes swim with tears as I turn tail and run from the dining hall back to the barracks, overwhelmed by the enormous sense of loss I feel. The loss of my dream to make the squad, the loss of Gray. It’s too much. As soon as I reach the barracks, I can’t hold it back anymore and I burst into tears. I’m half blinded by them as I make my way to my bunk, stooping down to pull my suitcase out from underneath. My whole body hurts- it’s like the gut-wrenching pain of Gray’s words is manifesting physically. It feels like there’s an empty hole in my chest where my hope used to reside. My body is wracked with sobs as I unzip my suitcase, flinging it open. I stomp around to the little open closet at the end of the bunk, pull on a t-shirt and shorts, and start yanking my clothes off of the hangers and throwing th
Alpha Gray 26
GRAY I’ve been pacing in my room at the squad barracks since I left the dining hall. My wolf is still furious, on edge, ready to tear to the surface. I should go run. Jax took Hannah to the infirmary, but her arm was already starting to heal. She’ll be fine soon enough and won’t even have a scar to show for it. Me, on the other hand… I’m not sure if my wolf will ever forgive me for sending Fallon away. I haven’t forgotten the way that Hannah was glaring at Fallon on the practice field this morning. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was the one who instigated the fight. Still, that doesn’t excuse Fallon’s behavior. I can’t let her get away with something like that just because my wolf wants her. What kind of leader would I be if I let my personal relationships get in the way of pack safety? I decide to go for a run. Thoughts of Fallon must be seeping into my subconscious, because I swear I can smell her as I
Alpha Gray 27
GRAY “Well, what’s the word?” Theo asks as I approach him and the other guys in the arena the next morning. I asked them to meet me here a little early so we could discuss what happened last night and make sure they’re okay with reinstating Fallon. I have a feeling Brock’s going to push back, so I’m already bracing myself for the worst. “Good morning to you, too,” I grumble, settling my hands on my hips. My eyes are heavy from lack of sleep- I was tossing and turning all night, regretting how things ended with Fallon and dreading this conversation. “I assume you all know what I want to talk about,” I say, looking around at Jax, Brock, Reid, and Theo. Jax cracks a smile. “Yeah, we figured it was about what your girl did last night.” I sigh, staring at the ground and kicking at the dirt. “Yeah.” I wish the fight between Hannah and Fallon hadn’t happened, and I wish even more that it wasn’t over me. The wh
Alpha Gray 28
FallonWednesday night rolls around and I’m assigned to patrol again. I worry that things will be a little awkward with Vienna since I took her out of the tournament this afternoon, but she doesn’t hold a grudge. She’s a fucking delight, as usual, which somehow makes my victory even more hollow.The tournament has been awesome so far. Everyone got their first match in over the past two afternoons, and the victors are moving on to the next round tomorrow. Davis wound up losing his matchup against Judd, but since there was an odd number of victors advancing, the alphas threw us all a curveball and chose one of the losers to move on, too. Davis got the wildcard vote from them, which he totally deserved- he put up a hell of a fight against Judd.Boyd’s advancing, too- he gave Connor a lot of shit for losing his matchup against Shay yesterday, but now he’s shaking in his boots a little because he&r
Alpha Gray 29
GRAY I almost take Brock’s head off when he fills me in on everything that happened last night. I was alerted that the rogue was back right after he was spotted, but he conveniently left out the part about Fallon being attacked. Probably because he knew I’d rage out, and I guess he thought that was better left to after we set a plan in motion to track down the rogue. We still haven’t found him, which makes matters even worse. That just means the threat’s still out there, lurking, and could reappear at any time. I’ve got my best guys out there trying to track him down, but so far, I haven’t heard anything. I’m on edge, ready to explode at any moment. We need to get this rogue situation handled, and we aren’t going to do that by sitting around and waiting for him to attack again. If we don’t wind up finding him today, we’ll need to regroup, get a new plan in motion. For that, we’ll need Fallon. A knock comes at m
Alpha Gray 30
FALLON It may have gotten off to a rough start, but now I swear I’m having the best goddamn week of my life. Yesterday’s little rendezvous with Gray was by far the hottest sexual experience I’ve ever had, even if it was interrupted before we could seal the deal. Now I know for sure that this thing isn’t over between us, despite what he said before. Yesterday proved that he wants me every bit as badly as I want him, and when I want something, I fucking go for it. No, this definitely isn’t over, and I’m eagerly awaiting the next time we’re alone. Having an alpha punch my v-card will be a pretty epic way to lose it. I was riding the high of my little tryst with Gray when I entered the arena to face off against Brennan yesterday, and my wolf absolutely destroyed his. The alphas didn’t even have to deliberate- I was the clear winner, which means I’ve moved on to the next stage of the tournament. They threw in another wildcard to ac
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Alpha Gray 55
FALLON It feels a little strange returning to the squad complex on Tuesday morning, like I’ve been away for weeks rather than days. So much has happened since I passed through the gate on Saturday afternoon, staring out the window from the backseat of Boyd’s dad’s SUV, turning over in my mind whether I’d have the courage to come back for the full moon run. I’m so fucking glad I did. I was being a total chicken, which isn’t like me at all. Then again, love makes you do some crazy, foolish things. Thank god my sister was there to make me realize how stupid I was being and talk me into coming back to face the music- I definitely owe her one. I’ll add it to the list of debts I owe Brooke for always coming through when I need her. Gray slides the Jeep into his usual spot outside the gate, throwing it in park and cutting the engine. He turns to me, dark eyes alight w
Alpha Gray 54
GRAY “They’re ready for you, Alpha,” Deke says, peering in the doorway of my bedroom at the packhouse expectantly, a grin spreading across his face. He’s looking forward to this almost as much as I am- the moment I finally get to tell my pack that I’ve found my mate. While Deke and I have done our best to hold our fractured pack together since I was forced to prematurely step up as their alpha, having a luna completes our pack in some sense, makes us more whole. The future of our pack is brighter than ever. I’m so fucking proud to introduce Fallon to the pack as my mate. She’s a perfect luna- so strong and brave, a force to be reckoned with. I couldn’t have designed a better she-wolf to lead the pack with me if I’d tried; she’s so much more than I could’ve ever imagined. I can tell she’s nervous- she’s changed her clothes twice since we returned to the packhouse, and she’s been fiddling with her hair in the mir
Alpha Gray 53
GRAY I wake the next morning from the best night’s sleep of my life. I spent hours alternating between fucking and making love to Fallon, coaxing moans from her pouty lips and watching her pant and writhe in pleasure. I’m still completely in awe of her, still in disbelief that she’s finally mine, forever. We’ve sealed the mate bond; nothing can separate us. I was so wrapped up in Fallon last night that I totally forgot about the full moon run, or the fact that my pack was probably wondering where the hell I went after it ended. My bedroom’s far enough away from the main area of the packhouse that I doubt anyone could’ve heard us- but then again, with the way Fallon was screaming, it’s anyone’s guess. There’s no concealing my contentedness when I enter the kitchen of the packhouse the next day. Deke’s cooking something in a pan on the stove and I stop in the doorway, leaning idly against it and clearing my throat to ann
Alpha Gray 52
FALLON “I always knew it was you,” Gray murmurs in my ear as he carries me through the packhouse, up the stairs and down the hall. Warmth spreads in my chest as I plant a shower of kisses on his cheeks, his nose, his eyelashes, his forehead. I’m so in awe of him, of how it feels to be his, for him to be mine. My parents were right; there’s no way to put the mate bond into words. It’s complete and utter euphoria. Everything I’ve ever felt for Gray is multiplied tenfold; the emotions are so overpowering I don’t know whether I want to laugh or cry or scream or pass out. Scratch that- I know what I want. I want him to take me to his bed and fuck me senseless. Gray kicks the door of his bedroom closed behind us, carrying me over to the bed and tossing me down onto it. My body bounces with the springy softness of the mattress, then his body covers mine, his lips crushing down in another bruising kiss. He pushes himse
Alpha Gray 51
GRAYThey say if you love something, you should let it go. So I did. I set her free, and I don’t think she’s coming back.I still have no regrets.Those weeks I spent with Fallon were the first time I’ve felt alive- really alive- in a long time. For the past five years, I’ve been numb, frozen in my grief, pushing forward blindly and refusing to let anyone or anything in, refusing to really feel anything. Throwing myself into my duties as alpha and to the security squad to avoid any semblance of an actual personal life. Then Fallon came along and started chipping away at the dam, breaking it down and causing a flood.Even if she doesn’t come back, at least I had that glimpse at happiness for a moment. I now know for certain that there can be real joy in life on the other side of the pain I’ve been suffering since my family was ripped away from me. She’s both
Alpha Gray 50
GRAY “Will you shut the fuck up and focus?” Brock snaps, pounding his fist on the table. We’ve been shut in this stuffy conference room for the better part of an hour, combing through the details of every recruit’s last trial, agonizing over our final selections for the squad. The conversation about Bex started to go off the rails when Jax commented on her massive rack, then took a nosedive when Theo started in on what he’d do if he had the opportunity to take her home for a night. Brock, Reid and I are all used to their antics by now, but we’re stressed, we’re exhausted, and more than anything, we’re ready to get the hell out of this room. Now isn’t the time for the Jax and Theo roadshow. “Jeez, man, lighten up,” Theo grumbles, shooting Brock a sideways glance. Brock lets out an exasperated sigh, scrubbing a hand over his face. “I just want to get this over with.” “Me too,” Reid agrees. “Let’s
Alpha Gray 49
FALLON It might seem like overkill for my friends and I to sneak in extra training after the alphas work us so hard all day, but our nighttime sessions have quickly become my favorite ritual. As wolf shifters, we already have a strong drive to stick close with one another, be part of a pack, and the bonding that occurs when you spend an extended amount of time with the same people is no different. It’s like my friends and I have formed our own little pack within the pack, learning each other’s strengths and weaknesses, having one another’s backs. I feel a tinge of sadness when Boyd suggests we call it a night on Friday evening, the realization sinking in that this is our little group’s last after-hours session together. By this time tomorrow, we’ll know whether we’ve made the squad- and I’m so hopeful that we’ll all make it, together. It seems like the others must have similar sentiments, because we take a little longe
Alpha Gray 48
FALLON “Girl, you’re on fire!” Shay laughs, elbowing me. “About time you got that damn flag, for real this time!” We’re sitting at our usual table in the dining hall on Wednesday evening, still pumped about our war games win this afternoon. The alphas let us choose our own teams this time around, so naturally my friends and I fielded ourselves together. I got the flag fair and square and I even made it across the boundary without one of my own teammates taking me down- and the best part? Since we were all teamed together, we all get to share the victory. “What’s this about a flag?” Brooke asks, walking up behind me with a plate in hand. “I keep hearing something around the complex about how my sister’s a total badass.” She waggles her eyebrows, setting her plate on the table and kicking a leg over the bench, sliding in to take a seat beside me. I’ve totally turned it around since Monda
Alpha Gray 47
FALLON I feel like shit. I’ve been bottling everything up since Saturday night- I haven’t even gone to Brooke to talk things over. I don’t know why… maybe I’m embarrassed? I feel like a fool for getting involved with Gray. Hannah’s words still haunt me. As I jog onto the practice field on Monday morning, all of my muscles are achy, like the pain I’ve tried to bury deep in my soul is physically manifesting in my body. Then I see Gray standing out there with the other alphas and the sight of him cuts like a dagger straight to the heart. Even in his workout attire- gym shorts and a cutoff t-shirt- he’s an Adonis. His magnetic eyes immediately find mine. I dart my gaze away quickly, staring at the back of Davis’ neck instead as I follow him to the center of the practice field and take a spot beside him. I’m now close enough that I can smell Gray, my wolf stirring in response, but I can’t bring myself to look at him
