Mom offered me a ride home, which I reluctantly said no to. My face was red and puffy, aching from how much I had cried in her office. I needed time to think. Being trapped in a car with my Mom would only bring on the tears, and I didn't want any more of those. My body groaned and ached with fatigue, but I trudged home anyway.
It was a fifteen minute walk to my neighborhood, giving me too much time to think. The entire scene in the hallway replayed in my head a million times. I thought of every possible thing I could've said, everything I could've done differently.
Y'know how something happens to you and after it's done you think of everything you could have said? That was what I was going through. I could've pleaded, I could've simply stepped into his arms and used the mate bond against him. I didn't though, I didn't because I was weak. This fact was beginning to dawn on me, how I lacked true strength.
When I made it home, I ran inside and grabbed a notebook and a pen. As soon as I had entered the house, I was already leaving. I needed to see Micah one last time, just to say goodbye. I would miss Micah the most, miss the time we had spent together. Spending time with Micah was addicting. I could forget everything going on in my life with him. He had a carefree attitude that was addicting, one I had grown used to.
I was disappointed when I came to the bank of the river. I wasn't sure why I had expected him to be there. It was one in the afternoon on a Friday. Micah wouldn't be here at this time. Our visits became less frequent, but I looked forward to them regardless.
Instead of hanging around, I pulled out the notebook and pen. I figured if he wasn't here I'd leave him a note, letting him know I had left. The thought of Micah waiting around for me hurt, so I decided the truth was better than nothing.
Micah
I'm not sure if you'll ever see this but I really hope you do. I can't give you any excuses on why this happened, so I hope you'll understand. My Mom and I are leaving. We're moving somewhere else. I can't tell you why, but maybe someday I'll be able to. I just wanted to leave this so you know I'm safe. Thanks for being my first friend and giving me somewhere to forget my problems. Hopefully we'll meet again someday.
Raelynn
I sat the notebook on top of the flat rock Micah would always perch on. Hopefully the weather would be kind, and hopefully Micah would actually show up tomorrow.
I walked back to the house, realizing I only had an hour left to pack. I only grabbed the essentials, stuffing some clothes in a suitcase for Mom and I. I tucked some pictures of Dad into a box and stuffed it in the suitcase as well. Everything else was replaceable.
Once I was finished, I looked around the bedroom I had spent my entire life in. These four walls held me since I was a baby, keeping me safe at night. The chipped paint that had been replaced countless times held more memories than I could comprehend. I tried to think back to my childhood, wincing at the blank spots. The injury to my head had done it's damage, stealing away some of my coveted memories.
I found myself sitting in the living room, my eyes scanning the pictures on the walls. This was how Mom found me when she came into the house an hour and a half later. Her ponytail was falling, some of the long hairs sticking up on her head.
"Everything's set." Mom nodded, standing in the doorway with a strange look on her face. "I didn't tell them anything. They gave us the clear to leave."
"Good." I nodded, looking as lost as Mom did.
"Y'know--I never wanted to move here." Mom chuckled, "I hated this house, still do."
"You didn't?" I found myself asking despite the pain in my chest, "I always thought you loved this place."
"Oh no." Mom shook her head, "Dad loved this place. I couldn't bare to tell him I hated this damn house."
This was the first time Mom willingly talked about Dad. The same pain flashed in her eyes, but this time she seemed more at ease with it. Maybe this was a new start for the both of us.
"I think this will be good for us, Raelynn." Mom turned to me, a small glimmer of hope in her eyes. "I think we both need to leave our pasts behind."
"I would like that." My voice was small, unsure. I knew no matter how hard I tried, I would think about Atlas Andino until the day I died.
We left only twenty minutes later. Mom asked where I wanted to go, I told her I didn't care. The Alpha and Luna told us we could relocate to another pack, but could not live as rogues. I told Mom to pick whichever pack she wanted.
The car ride was silent, but I battled my tears the entire time. My mind flickered from Atlas to my Mom. She had given everything up for me, while he couldn't even give me a chance. Mom had given me the world, but Atlas couldn't even open up his heart. She was leaving her home behind, while Atlas was leaving me behind.
I continued fighting the tears until I fell asleep, my head resting against the cool glass of the car window.
I awoke to the sound of a car door shutting. My eyes snapped open and darted around. We were in a hotel parking lot, the hotel's neon sign blinking rapidly. Sands hotel, it was called. One of those hotels where the doors were outside and each room had it's own balcony.
"Where are we?" I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, pulling myself out of the car slowly.
Mom was pulling our suitcases from the car, slamming the trunk shut with a thud.
"I didn't mean to wake you." Mom smiled softly, "I drove a solid ten hours, but I need some sleep."
"Don't worry about it." I nodded, "The car did no favors for my back."
The more I thought about Atlas, the sharper the pain got. When I pushed him from my mind, the pain faded. It left me feeling numb and detached. Was this the choice I was left with? Be in constant pain or feel numb to the world?
We clamored up the stairs and into our hotel room. There was nothing fancy about the room, but it had two beds and a working shower. I plopped down on one of the double beds and curled into a ball. Sleep was already beginning to take me.
"Did you want a shower?" Mom's gentle touch was on my shoulder, and I grumbled in response.
"No." I mumbled, "I'll shower in the morning."
Mom was silent as she crept away, and I faded happily into sleep.
We left the next morning. I showered and changed my clothes into something comfortable. She said we were going somewhere warm, knowing how much I hated the cold. The thought made me miss Texas. I would miss the lush forest with it's incredible wildlife and density. There was so much room to explore and run around.
We spent all day driving, only stopping for food and the occasional bathroom break. The monotony was getting overwhelming, my thoughts constantly going back to Atlas.
"Where are we going?" I frowned, glancing at my Mom's GPS before she turned it out of my view.
"No peeking." She scolded with a stern face, but her lips broke out into a smile. "It's going to be a surprise."
I wanted to tell her not to bother, that surprises didn't matter anymore. I couldn't say the words after seeing the excited look on her face.
We stopped at another hotel that night, repeating the same process as yesterday. We had driven much longer today, and Mom had let it slip that we only had four hours left to go.
I woke early that morning, ready to get the rest of the drive finished. I'd be the happiest girl in the world if I never had to go on a ten hour drive again in my life. I was tired of sitting in the car, watching the buildings pass as we zoomed down the highway. I'd assume we were somewhere in California, judging from the road signs.
My favorite part of the entire drive was going through the desert. Everything was so big and open out there. It made you feel insignificant when placed against something so vast. I found the desert strangely beautiful, Lila disagreed with me.
'It's just a big bowl of sand and rock.' Lila shook her head, 'Nothing pretty about it. Wanna know what's pretty? Forest's are pretty.'
I could tell we were nearing the end when Mom was practically jumping in her seat. Her eyes flickered excitedly to each building in town. The town was much bigger than our own, but the buildings also seemed older.
"Were here." Mom breathed, the start of a grin on her face.
I looked at her in confusion. Where was here?
"This is where I grew up." Mom breathed, her eyes dancing with excitement as we pulled up to the red light. "Welcome to the Night Walker pack."
The Night Walker pack was just another in a long list of packs through out the United States. The name sounded familiar, but I couldn't place my finger on where I had heard the name.
"I told you about my old pack, remember?" Mom grinned. "You had to have been seven or eight."
"I can't remember ever hearing you say those words." I chuckled humorlessly, rubbing my temple as a sharp pain zipped in my head.
"Must've forgotten." Mom frowned, "The best warriors come from the Night Walker pack. They send the warriors all over to help packs and fight rogues."
Mom sounded so excited, so wistful.
"I was one of their warriors once." Mom nodded proudly, a grin on her face as my eyes widened in surprise.
"You?" I was speechless, "A warrior?"
"I was." Mom grinned, "Not one of the best, but I was still a warrior. That's how I met your Dad."
Mom's voice trailed off, her eyes glazing over. It only lasted a split second, much shorter than the times it happened in the past.
"Sorry." Mom chuckled, her smile soft. "This place just has a lot of memories."
"And you wanted to come back?" I grimaced. Why would she want to be bombarded with those memories? Having been rejected, I understand why she'd want to forget.
"It wasn't all bad." Mom smiled softly, "I grew up here. My Mom and Dad lived right in the center of town. Dad owned a hardware shop just over there."
Mom pointed at one of the buildings. It looked like it had been remodeled into something else. Grandma and Grandpa died when I was young. I couldn't remember much about them, but I had heard plenty of stories.
Grandma and Grandpa were the best example of mates. Grandpa's family hated Grandma, but he never let that stop him. He took Grandma into his arms and promised her the world. His family disowned him, took away his inheritance but he didn't care. He stayed with Grandma through it all, and she with him. Their lives had ended peacefully, nearly at the same moment. That was the classic love story everyone wanted to hear. Guy meets girl, they fall in love, defy the odds, have a family, and die together peacefully.
I wondered if they realized how unique that was. How many people truly get happy endings? My black and white vision was becoming melded, shades of grey forming in the cracks. Was an ending truly all happy? Or did the good mix with the bad and make it bittersweet?
I wasn't sure I believed in happy ending's anymore.
Mom drove through the center of town, turning into one of the residential neighborhoods. Every house nearly looked the same. Small and identical, ideal to fit the most amount of people in a small space."It's not as big as our old house." Mom grinned sheepishly, "But it's the best I could get on short notice. The landlord was friends with my Dad.""It's not a problem." I chuckled, my eyes tracing over the small square windows.My eyes were elsewhere. They were trailing over the porch's peeling blue paint. A low whine left Lila's lips as she recognized the similarities. That was one thing that needed to be changed.Mom parked on the curb by the house and popped open the trunk. Her arms were filled with bags as she wobbled down the sidewalk. I must've packed more than I thought. Her arms were overflowing with bags as she tried to carry everything at once. She could hardly see where she was going, nearly bumping into someone."Woah--" A man's voice c
Mom came into my room shortly after, letting me know everything with the school was in order. I would be officially starting school tomorrow, the thought frightening yet exciting.I laid in bed that night, picking my phone up to send Kris a text. I ran my fingers over the keyboard, struggling to figure out what to say. Alyssa and I never really texted. We hung out constantly, but rarely ever communicated over the phone.-Me 10:23p.m.'I'm all set for school tomorrow. What time does it start?'-Kris 10:29p.m.'Cool! Starts at 7, be at my house at 6:45'I had meant to send a response, but my eyes were fluttering warily. I fell asleep on top of the covers, my phone resting on my chest. The next morning, Mom peeked her head in the door waking me up in the process."What time is it?" I grumbled, squinting down at my phone."5:30." Mom responded, "Bet you're regretting not taking me up on my earlier offer. You could've been home
One Month LaterLiam and I had become the closest out of the entire bunch. Nicki and I had also grown extremely close. She loved that I had no sense of fashion, and allowed her to choose my outfits for me. She often paired me with cute skirts and tennis shoes, or the occasional dress but I didn't mind.In the month I had been here, I had grown more confident. I was now telling jokes with Kris and Dustin, or talking about guys with Nicki and Tyra. I'd often hang out with Liam, who wasn't nearly as grumpy as Dustin painted him out to be.No matter how hard I tried, Atlas was always on my mind. The first two weeks in town were horrible. I would awake in the middle of the night screaming, my insides burning with an invisible fire. Every nerve and cell in my body was screaming in pain. My Mom rushed into my bedroom without fail, soothing me with her words as best she could. After a few days, I finally got the truth from her. The truth broke my heart more than words ever
Six Months LaterI often thought back on the talk I had with Beta Ned. He was quite understanding about my situation, clearly seeing himself once in my position. While his words did nothing to lessen the pain, they helped me understand what to expect.I would never feel true happiness--not the way I would if my mate had accepted me. Atlas would always carry a piece of my soul within him, tethering himself to me. Even accepting his rejection would not remove that piece of my soul. Accepting rejection would only dull the mate-bond, making the pain fade as quickly as it had come. There was no taking back that piece of your soul. Once the Moon Goddess picked two mates, they would remain mates for life.Beta Ned asked why I had not fought for Atlas, why I had not tried something else instead of running away. I told him the truth--that I was weak and broke easily. He disagreed of course, but I already knew the truth. Beta Ned told me I might be better off accepting
Tyra and I shifted, darting into the woods behind Liam’s house. Lila was eager to stretch her legs, the two of us nearly bursting with anxiety. I was determined to keep away from the fight. We would provide help with evacuation, but fighting wasn’t in my skill set. I just needed to see my Mom, to make sure she was alright.Our paws thundered against the dry earth, twigs snapping under our feet. My chest burned with exhaustion, but I kept pushing forward. Somehow, I found the strength to continue running, even when my legs cried for mercy. Branches whipped across our fur, feeling like velvet across our thick skin.‘Over here.’ Tyra snapped through the mind link, darting out of the woods and behind one of the buildings in town.The two of us shifted, the warm air lapping against our exposed skin. I had never become comfortable with constant nudity, even after spending my life in a pack. My cheeks burned, but I tried to pay no mind.
I waited twenty minutes before exiting out the back door. Hopefully long enough for Tyra to get the kids out safely and far enough away. Each snarl and growl I heard set me farther on edge. Fear rooted me to the spot, begging me to stay. It would’ve been easier to stay. I couldn’t even bring myself to look out the window, to see what was going on. Six months ago, I would’ve never imagined doing what I did today.Rogue's ran rampant down the street, tackled and killed by our own warriors. Windows in the buildings closest to the fight were shattered, glistening glass laying in the road. Blood splattered gruesomely, running down the front of some of the now vacant buildings. I could only hope everyone had gotten away safely, or were hiding until this mess was over.It was a start—but I forced myself to go out the back door. I crept behind two empty shops, trampling weeds and walking through tall grass. I stumbled through patches o
When I was seven, I asked my Mom for a new bike. I wanted this bike more than anything, convinced it would solve all of my child-like problems. Bright pink with waves of gentle orange, bright streamers dangling from the handles, and a large wicker basket on the front. I had begged and pleaded, negotiated and screamed until I was blue in the face.Mom had already gotten me a bike two months ago, a present for my birthday. She couldn't understand why I needed another; what importance that bike held in my child-like mind. Another month had passed, my begging and pleading only growing worse. Her and Dad were often on the same page, agreeing over just about everything. My begging and pleading had cracked Dad's willpower. He asked Mom if we could get me the bike. Dad understood as he always did. He understood what that bike meant to me, understood my childish reasons behind wanting it in the first place.Mom was solid in her resolve, but suggested a s
Two days; that was how long I sat in the spare bedroom of Liam's house.Food tasted like ash in my mouth, mixing with my spit to create a disgusting cement texture. I felt itchy and uncomfortable in my own skin, but couldn't force myself to shift.The day after the fight, a large ceremony was held for all of the lives lost. I couldn't force myself from the bed, couldn't force myself to face what I had lost.The pain was overwhelming, and some cruel part of me hoped Alpha Atlas could feel every excruciating sting that pulsed under my skin. After the pain he had caused me for months, he deserved a little in return.Liam, Dustin, Kris, Nicki and Tyra all visited me that day. They didn't force me to go, nor did they pressure me into leaving the room. Kris was the only one who seemed to understand what I was feeling, as he too had lost his Mom many years ago.Liam's parents welcomed me into the
One Year Later “You could be over here with your true mate and not sweating your ass off, but no—violence prevails.” I sighed dramatically, grabbing a grape, and plopping it into my mouth. Atlas was easily a hundred feet away, his skin porcelain and shimmering with sweat. I eyed the thick muscles that spanned his shoulders and back, running down the length of his thick arms. “Well, I guess the view isn’t that bad.” “Speak for yourself, I love a little violence to start off my day. Nothing gets the blood pumping like political intrigue, vigorous training or a good old-fashioned fight.” Nicki grinned manically, leaning against the thick truck of the tree she sat in front of. Her chestnut hair had lightened from spending the year in Liam’s court, beneath the blistering sun and thick humidity. It now held golden undertones that matched her tanned skin. The dress she wore was bound at the shoulders with golden pins and reminded me of the Greek goddesses taught in
I pulled Nicki into my arms, my heart swelling with the strength of my best-friend. I said nothing because Nicki needed no reassurance. She could see the flame that burned within her as well as everyone else; Nicki never once doubted her place in the world, or her own importance. Even on my darkest days, when Atlas’s rejection sapped the happiness from even the smallest of things, the undying confidence Nicki had in herself and the people she loved fueled me. Once Dustin appeared and dragged her away, I was able to catch up with Liam and see how things were going—and to get some elaboration on the previously mentioned assassination attempt. Atlas had kept his snarling to a minimum when Liam pulled me in for a bear hug, even if his eyes were hardened shards of granite afterwards. “Really, it was awful. Not even a whole-hearted attempt.” Liam shook his head, disappointment for the unskilled assassin. His lips twitched into a smirk, and the teasing note in his v
Three Months LaterMy stomach was twisted with nerves and excitement as I stood beneath the magically crafted arch of waterlilies and cherry blossoms Tyra herself had created. Atlas was at my side, his arm looped through mine as I leaned against him for support.We were initially skeptical about the pure white flowers, but the delicate aroma they emitted was well worth it. Clusters of tulips, orchids, and peonies were strewn throughout the courtyard, which had been completely remodeled for the grand ball I had been planning for months now.With Atlas by my side, I stood atop a long staircase looking down at the arduous work of countless fae, myself included. It was easy to forget about the sprawling crowd down below, watching us with interested and eager eyes.From the decorations to the guest list, I had full reigns of this project. Of course, I had a near endless supply of assistants at my side, all of which were introduced to me by Alette and Adelina.
Micah and Liam could only stay for a few short days, each one packed full of planning and introductions. Micah and Finn were helping Atlas and Liam, teaching them the differences between High Lord and Alpha—though they technically were both. We hadn’t figured out a way back to the human realm, but there was plenty here to keep us busy; for now. Our first day in the castle, Alette confided in me that during the last moments of battle, she had flung a gust of ice and rage at Aralia, sending her flying into a portal. I followed Alette through the castle, while Adelina rejoiced over the fact that Melia was alive and well, along with her five sisters. “There’s no way she would have survived it. Not when it hit her square in the chest like that.” Alette insisted, her eyes welded forwards as we wandered the maze-like halls of the castle. She knew where she was going without a fault, while I had become lost an hour ago. “I assumed she would end up here, in th
Nicki and Dustin had taken charge, helping the newly turned Fae that came through the wall. Every five minutes another blinding flash of light would appear, leaving spots that danced in our vision and more fae in our wake.My attention momentarily flickered over to Atlas, who was speaking with a group of warriors, some of which had passed through days ago. Duke stood at his side, silent but always watching. A flash of midnight hair and clothing darker than the night sky appeared from the western corridor. Ambrose, High Lord of the Night Court’s slender form appeared from around the corner.Ambrose was the only one to have improved in looks after the battle we had all endured. He had been thin before, a testament to the damage his sister had done on his body and court. His face had filled out since the battle ended; his slim frame now etched in lean muscle. He approached Atlas and Duke, nodding at the various warriors who bowed in his midst.“Oh, don&
We formed a line, with each of us walking in pairs of four.Most who chose not to pass through lingered, watching with eyes that bordered on curiosity and fear. It was that flicker of curiosity that gave me hope, because sooner or later they might feel the call of this place.There was a part of me that trembled with excitement, almost desperate to return to the vibrant colors and scents, and the rush of magic within every gust of wind and drop of water. I wanted to learn the secrets of this realm and explore the hidden corners of the court under Atlas’s rule, mastering the wild magic that fluttered in my chest.Another part of me, the small part that would always remain mortal, mourned the memories, and ghosts I was leaving behind.At the very back of the line were the warriors. A sea of metal headpieces and colorful armor stood out as fae from every court gathered. Those who fought to the death days ago, now walked side-by-side.There had b
Surprise and indecision rippled across countless werewolves faces as the word spread, and they finally began to understand the decision that lie ahead. I never enjoyed public speaking. Having the attention of so many eyes burning into my skin was unsettling, but I wasn’t alone. Along with the steadying presence of Atlas beside me, I had friends who had stood by me through all of this. Each of us had taken turns speaking, sharing our story and what we had come to learn. I told the crowd what I had done, merging the two realms together, separating them with a wall of pure magic. It was the only choice I had, the only thing that would have saved them both. The very connection that brought our realms together would have destroyed us both. It was Atlas who revealed the truth of the past, that werewolves were not from the human realm. A very small few of us had come here a long time ago, forgoing immortality for this new world. The only thin
Something rippled behind Liam, towards the center of the charred circle of earth.The scent of rain filled my nose, marred only by the slightest hint of blood. The fae and werewolves must have been busy, identifying and burning the dead. My heart threatened to sink for the families who had lost loved ones in the battle, but I couldn’t let myself drown in the emotion, forever stuck in the past. I needed to press forward.The ground crunched beneath my feet, and I stopped when Liam placed a hand on my shoulder. I tilted my head, watching closely as the sun crested the trees, hitting the spot where we all stood.It looked like a thin film that spanned west and east, far into the sky where it vanished within the fiery light of the sun. I marveled at how it shimmered, the colors rippling like shaky water. When its color rippled like that, it was near impossible to see through. There seemed to be nothing on the other side, just the rest of the park.&ldqu
I woke Atlas as the sun began streaming through the curtains, turning his platinum hair silver. His eyelids were pale blue, the dark circles beneath an even deeper shade.He shifted in his sleep, eyebrows furrowing as he felt my guilt. He really was exhausted.I tried to pry at the thick arms that were wound around my torso, pinning me to his chest. His plush lips moved as he mumbled, letting out a satisfied hum as he tightened his hold.The voices coming from the first floor of the house were growing louder. Tyra and Dustin were talking, heading through the kitchen and towards the stairs that would lead to Atlas and me.I smirked and pinched his bicep, “Tyra and Dustin are seconds away from knocking on this bedroom door. Either I can get you up, or they can.”A surprised yelp escaped my mouth when he rolled in bed, never once loosening his grip on me. My legs dangled uselessly as he stood from the bed, holding me against his chest.