CHAPTER TWO

ESSENCE

My alarm dragged me out of a sleep I didn’t remember falling into. For a second, I forgot why my chest felt so heavy..... then I remembered.

I sat up slowly, stretching my arms until my shoulders popped. Yawning, I glanced at the clock. Almost five in the morning, because apparently, heartbreak wakes up early.

I was still surprised I’d made it home last night. After everything that had happened—the humiliation, the cold, and the fact that my family treated me like an afterthought—I’d driven home like a zombie on autopilot.

And I lived to tell the tale. Sort of.

It still hurt, thinking about last night. But sitting around feeling sorry for myself wasn’t going to get my family back. I was determined to fix it..... to fix me.

I climbed out of bed, splashed water on my face to clear the fog, and headed straight for the kitchen.

A while later, I had breakfast set up at the dining table. Toasted bread, eggs, sausage, fruit—served with the kind of love and hope only a woman trying desperately to hold her marriage together could manage.

Next was my hygiene.

I had a rule. I never left the house unless I felt fresh. So, I brushed my teeth, took a hot bath, and squeezed myself into gym clothes that screamed 'new year, new me,' even though it was mid-June.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been on the big side. Size twenty-two. It never used to bother me. In fact, I was once pretty damn confident.

But then Remi Vanguard arrived, and with her, the disgust started.

First, it was just Vesper. Alex’s sister had always been generous with her opinions about my weight. But now, even Alex… even my son, Asher… they could barely stand to be near me.

Like I was contagious.

There was a time I was happy with my body and comfortable in my skin. But now? I wanted to shed half my weight if that’s what it took to make Alex want me again.

I didn’t want to be perfect.

I just didn’t want to be invisible.

When I got to the gym, it was blissfully empty. Well, except for the night guard, who barely looked up from his phone.

Good.

I liked it that way.

After the disaster of my first gym day, when I tripped, fell face-first, and got laughed at by a group of people, I’d made it my mission to avoid witnesses at all costs.

I had workout videos on my phone, carefully curated from the least judgmental fitness YouTubers I could find. I queued one up, took a deep breath, and got started.

Twenty minutes later, I was running on the treadmill like my life depended on it.

Which, in a way, it did.

My heart was pounding so fast I was pretty sure it was about to send me a formal notice: “Dear Essence, we’re done.”

But I kept going.

'No pain, no gain.' That had become my personal slogan. Okay, fine, more like a desperate chant I clung to while imagining Remi’s perfect little waist.

I had almost stopped feeling my legs when I heard a deep male voice behind me.

“Are you trying to stay fit or commit suicide?”

The words startled me and I jumped. Which was a problem, because I was on a moving treadmill.

The next few seconds were a blur.

One second I was running, the next I lost my footing, and gravity did the rest. I pitched forward, bracing myself for a spectacular wipeout.

But it never came.

Instead, two strong arms caught me. Effortlessly. Like they did this every day before breakfast.

I opened my eyes slowly, fully prepared to find myself on the gym floor, kissing concrete.

Nope.

My face was about six inches away from a chest that looked like it had been sculpted by a team of ancient gods on a serious protein binge.

It was hard, solid and smelled stupidly good. Like expensive cologne and clean sweat. It wasn’t fair.Who the hell smelled this good at a gym?

That should be illegal.

I didn’t even smell that good after a shower.

His T-shirt clung to him like it was jealous of his skin, stretched over broad shoulders that probably had gym equipment named after them.

I dragged my eyes up, slowly and found myself staring at a jawline so sharp. He had a bit of scruff, just enough to say, 'I could shave, but why ruin perfection?'

And his eyes? A pair of green eyes. Not regular green. No, they were bright, sharp, and had this way of looking at me like he knew every dumb thought I was having. Thick, dark brows pulled together, either in concern or amusement. Maybe both.

His nose was straight, like it had been designed with a ruler, and his lips…

Don’t even get me started.

Full, smooth, a little pouty—but in a manly way that made no sense. The kind of mouth that probably gave orders in boardrooms and whispered trouble after hours.

And he was tall. Not just tall… tall. I’m talking “change the lightbulb without a ladder” tall. Six foot three, maybe four. Which meant I was eye level with his chest and…

“You okay?” His voice was low. Rough. Like he could read bedtime stories and you’d still need a cold shower afterward.

His hand was still on my waist, steady and warm, like he didn’t plan on letting go anytime soon.

I nodded like an idiot, because my brain had officially shut down. I was also still holding on to his bicep. In my defense, it was basically a rock with skin.

This is what happens when you’ve been told for years you’re undesirable. A hot guy shows up, and your brain melts like cheap ice cream in the sun.

I took a shaky breath. I could still hear Alex’s voice in my head. "Who else would bother with a fat cow like you?"

I needed to leave immediately, before I embarrassed myself any more than I already had.

“I… I… am… am… sorry,” I stammered as I straightened up and took a step back.

“I didn’t know someone else was here,” I added. “I’ll leave right away.”

I started walking. Fast. Like a woman trying to outrun her own mortification.

“Hey! Hold up,” he called after me. “Why leave? We can share.”

I froze, staring at the exit like it was the doorway to salvation.

Share?

With him?

I swallowed hard.

“I’m fine,” I said, taking another step.

“I get it,” he said. “You’re scared. You think I’m one of those guys who take advantage of beautiful women when no one’s watching.”

I stopped dead.

Beautiful?

Was it just me, or did this drop-dead stranger just insinuate that I was beautiful?

I turned before my brain could tell me not to.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

He smiled.

“I mean,” he said, taking two steps closer, “I’m not that guy. You were here first. If you leave, I’ll feel like a jerk.”

I barely registered anything after the word beautiful.

It echoed in my head like a song stuck on repeat.

No one had called me that in years. Not without a snort or an eye roll.

And for reasons I didn’t fully understand, I needed to know.

“Are you saying I’m beautiful?”

God. The stupidest question I had ever asked anyone.

Ever.

He chuckled. “What a weird question. Isn’t it obvious?”

I blinked.

No, it wasn’t obvious.

In fact, I was 99% sure he was either blind or messing with me. How could probably the hottest man on the planet think I am beautiful?”

He tilted his head, his gaze sharpening. “You seem surprised.”

He wasn’t teasing.

“Hasn’t anyone told you you’re beautiful before?”

No.

No, they hadn’t.

I said it inwardly but his next words made me wonder if he could read my mind.

“Alright then,” he said, “I’ll correct their mistake. You’re not just beautiful. You’re curvy, sexy, and....”

“Stop,” I said quickly, turning away before I did something stupid.....like believe him.

Or smile.

Or cry.

I needed to get out of here. I took a step, but I misjudged the angle.

And just like before, I tripped.

This time, I was sure I was going down, face-first.

But in the blink of an eye, he was there.

And once again, he caught me.