BASH The officer who sat before me was merely in his late twenties. He looked timid and sweat formed on his forehead. I haven't even started yet. "Adın ne? (What is your name?)" I asked him. "Baris," He replied. "Mr. Merrick," His superior interrupted me. I raised my hand to stop. "Do you understand English?" I asked Baris. He nodded his head. I nod my head, rolling my sleeves up to my elbow. "Do you have children?" I asked him. He trembled a little. "Please," He begged. I leaned closer, "Do I look like a person who could harm your kids, Baris?" He nodded his head. I raised my brow, and he shook his head immediately. "Let's say your daughter has been in a fire accident. Her wounds are still raw, and I went to her and talked about nothing but the burns. How you would react?" "I didn't get it." He answered, his face as pale as snow. "Of course, you don't. You wouldn't. I asked you a hyp
BASH(11 YEARS OLD) It happened so suddenly. One second, I was playing football with Luke, and the next second, I was chasing a faceless guy. It always happened to me. There are people and places I remember meeting but I never saw them in my life. I thought I had seen someone from my dreams. So, I followed him out of curiosity. I told my mom many times that I remembered the guns and the smell of cigars. But she said, I had never seen a gun in my real life, and insisted it was just my dream. I tried to draw them. But they became ugly scribbles. Turns out I don't have the skill to draw, and I didn't bother trying because my life was perfect. I didn't need to dwell on some random dreams until I saw a guy with a moustache that day. I followed him. But I lost in the middle of nowhere, and I was left alone without a phone or guard. Something about getting lost felt like a deja vu, as if I already experienced that. Suddenly, a truck came at me, and I was so sure that I was goi
HANA | THEN I saw Leo's car pulling up into our driveway, and that's when I first had my panic attack. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't focus on anything as my heartbeat quickened, my body trembled, and moved to the corner of my room. I heard him shout and ten minutes later, my mom stomped into my room. "Did you tell what happened to Micheal?" She asked me. Micheal did come yesterday to meet me. I remember how I flinched when he tried to touch my face. But he had been kindest to me ever since that incident. My mom sighed, sitting beside me. "It's okay. This will pass. We promised each other that we wouldn't tell what happened to anyone, right? It's for your own good." She tells me. "Never speak about this to anyone. Don't talk to Micheal." I believed her. I believed when she said she was doing everything for my good. I don't know how he made it happen, but Michael convinced my family to make me study abroad. I hated him for that. "It's for yo
HANA Michael suggested a hundred things we could do together, like the mall which I don’t find attractive at all, or the restaurant where I don’t want to spend more money or the church where the god whom I don’t believe exists. I wanted to spend more time with him, but given the circumstances, it felt highly inappropriate. He is here to deal with his father’s death. I do not want to stop him for me. All my thoughts started to drift back to Bash. He will be gone for five days. “Are you alright?” Michael asked me, he held my hand as we walked to my apartment. I nod my head. “You still feel like a little girl who used to hold my hand for every party because she was afraid, she would get lost in the crowd.” I smiled. “I have grown up now. But I am still lost. I have been lost for a while now.” “It’s okay. We all take time to find ourselves.” He hugged me one last time, gave me his card and shared all the social media IDs before he le
HANA I walked into Bash's study room to find him standing at the window, with a leather-bound book in his hand, a sad smile on his lips, a glint in his eyes and his knuckles white as though he was holding with everything he got. "Hey," I whispered to let him know that I was there. He turned his head, his expression immediately changed and his eyes brightened. That made me smile. The earnest happiness when he sees me is everything I never knew I needed. "Come in," He says, nodding his head to his side. He kept the book beside the monitor on his table. I have seen him hold it before but cannot remember where or when. "You good?" He asks me, kissing me on my forehead. I nod my head, fixing his tie. "When will you come back?" If he was not watching me, then I would have pouted. Honestly, to not feel him against me or see him smile at me for the next five days feels scary. Oh, no. I am falling hard for him. "I will try to be here
HANA There are so many things I concluded after reading Rose's letter. 1- Bash is not Xavier's biological father. 2- His biological father is a monster. 3- There was someone named Cillian and Sebastian who helped Rose escape from wherever she was. Perhaps they named these two cousins after them. 4- Xavier is a wonderful human being. 5- His wife killed herself. Now I wondered what Bash thought of me every time he looked at me. Does he see his mother? Because I made that decision before to end my life. But I will worry about that later. I need to see Bash now. The first thing I did was to book a flight for the next day. I slept at Bash's home that night and he was so happy I did that. I counted every second until it was morning. I looked at the mirror and practised smiling. It's nothing new to me. I had to put up an act if I had to get to Bash. Then I called Shalini. "I need a dress," I tell her. "What's the occasion?" She asked me. "It's surpr
HANA I woke up to the scent of leather, pressed against my cheek. The events of the morning ran in my mind at a glimpse. I quickly sat up, feeling disoriented. Bash was nowhere to be found. I pulled my phone out and saw Bash's text. I am stepping out. Call me when you are awake. I rubbed my temples cursing myself for falling asleep like that. I don't sleep much. Not sure when I started dozing off at random places. I called Bash, walking out. He hasn't lifted the phone. Before I tried again, I went to the girl from earlier. "Hey, I am sorry about earlier. I was in a hurry. I didn't [know what am I thinking." I tried to explain. She smiled. "It's alright, Miss. Levine. I should've known who you are." "How would you know? I don't even know who I am?" She chuckled at my words, "I have seen so many women with Mr. Merrick, and none are like you. That was supposed to make me happy but it felt like a twist of the knife inside my gut. Of course
HANA There is something I always do whenever I feel uncomfortable around people, analyse their personality and height so that I can plan my escape. Surely, Cillian is not paying attention to his south so I could kick, maybe twist his arm but he is too big for me. If he captured my hands, it would be hard. So I analyzed how I could bring him down to his knees if he tried to do anything to me. So far, nothing. He took a step forward, and I tried to stand my ground but it was too difficult because he was reeked of alcohol. It makes me want to throw up everything I eat for lunch. It's the middle of the day for goddam sake. He took another step forward, caging me between him and the wall. An evil smirk spread over his lips. I didn't feel threatened when Bash did the same. Cillian's large hand came around my neck. He gave it a light squeeze. His thumb grazed over my lips. Just a touch I am going back to the days of my middle school. "Stop," I begged, squeezing my eyes