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30. I DON'T LOVE HIM
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2023-12-05 21:22:48Related chapters
A TWENTY SOMETHING 31. I AM YOURS TOO
HANA Michael suggested a hundred things we could do together, like the mall which I don’t find attractive at all, or the restaurant where I don’t want to spend more money or the church where the god whom I don’t believe exists. I wanted to spend more time with him, but given the circumstances, it felt highly inappropriate. He is here to deal with his father’s death. I do not want to stop him for me. All my thoughts started to drift back to Bash. He will be gone for five days. “Are you alright?” Michael asked me, he held my hand as we walked to my apartment. I nod my head. “You still feel like a little girl who used to hold my hand for every party because she was afraid, she would get lost in the crowd.” I smiled. “I have grown up now. But I am still lost. I have been lost for a while now.” “It’s okay. We all take time to find ourselves.” He hugged me one last time, gave me his card and shared all the social media IDs before he le
Last Updated : 2023-12-06A TWENTY SOMETHING 32. DEAR XAVIER
HANA I walked into Bash's study room to find him standing at the window, with a leather-bound book in his hand, a sad smile on his lips, a glint in his eyes and his knuckles white as though he was holding with everything he got. "Hey," I whispered to let him know that I was there. He turned his head, his expression immediately changed and his eyes brightened. That made me smile. The earnest happiness when he sees me is everything I never knew I needed. "Come in," He says, nodding his head to his side. He kept the book beside the monitor on his table. I have seen him hold it before but cannot remember where or when. "You good?" He asks me, kissing me on my forehead. I nod my head, fixing his tie. "When will you come back?" If he was not watching me, then I would have pouted. Honestly, to not feel him against me or see him smile at me for the next five days feels scary. Oh, no. I am falling hard for him. "I will try to be here
Last Updated : 2023-12-09A TWENTY SOMETHING 33. SURPRISE
HANA There are so many things I concluded after reading Rose's letter. 1- Bash is not Xavier's biological father. 2- His biological father is a monster. 3- There was someone named Cillian and Sebastian who helped Rose escape from wherever she was. Perhaps they named these two cousins after them. 4- Xavier is a wonderful human being. 5- His wife killed herself. Now I wondered what Bash thought of me every time he looked at me. Does he see his mother? Because I made that decision before to end my life. But I will worry about that later. I need to see Bash now. The first thing I did was to book a flight for the next day. I slept at Bash's home that night and he was so happy I did that. I counted every second until it was morning. I looked at the mirror and practised smiling. It's nothing new to me. I had to put up an act if I had to get to Bash. Then I called Shalini. "I need a dress," I tell her. "What's the occasion?" She asked me. "It's surpr
Last Updated : 2023-12-10A TWENTY SOMETHING 34. HELLO, FIANCE
HANA I woke up to the scent of leather, pressed against my cheek. The events of the morning ran in my mind at a glimpse. I quickly sat up, feeling disoriented. Bash was nowhere to be found. I pulled my phone out and saw Bash's text. I am stepping out. Call me when you are awake. I rubbed my temples cursing myself for falling asleep like that. I don't sleep much. Not sure when I started dozing off at random places. I called Bash, walking out. He hasn't lifted the phone. Before I tried again, I went to the girl from earlier. "Hey, I am sorry about earlier. I was in a hurry. I didn't [know what am I thinking." I tried to explain. She smiled. "It's alright, Miss. Levine. I should've known who you are." "How would you know? I don't even know who I am?" She chuckled at my words, "I have seen so many women with Mr. Merrick, and none are like you. That was supposed to make me happy but it felt like a twist of the knife inside my gut. Of course
Last Updated : 2023-12-12A TWENTY SOMETHING 35. BETWEEN THEM
HANA There is something I always do whenever I feel uncomfortable around people, analyse their personality and height so that I can plan my escape. Surely, Cillian is not paying attention to his south so I could kick, maybe twist his arm but he is too big for me. If he captured my hands, it would be hard. So I analyzed how I could bring him down to his knees if he tried to do anything to me. So far, nothing. He took a step forward, and I tried to stand my ground but it was too difficult because he was reeked of alcohol. It makes me want to throw up everything I eat for lunch. It's the middle of the day for goddam sake. He took another step forward, caging me between him and the wall. An evil smirk spread over his lips. I didn't feel threatened when Bash did the same. Cillian's large hand came around my neck. He gave it a light squeeze. His thumb grazed over my lips. Just a touch I am going back to the days of my middle school. "Stop," I begged, squeezing my eyes
Last Updated : 2023-12-15A TWENTY SOMETHING 36. LOVING HIM
HANA "Are you talking about the guy you tied in your basement?" I mocked. But my insides dreaded that it would be true. What if it is true? "You know that's not what I mean," He tells me. I nod my head, "Yeah. You are right. I don't know what you mean. I don't know so much about it. But you seem to know everything about me." "We will talk about it," He says, slipping his hand in mine and giving it a light squeeze. He took me to the hotel where he was staying. The first thing I did was to sit in the shower. As the water cascaded over me, the reality of my life slowly started to sink in. This was bound to happen. How do I think that we could be fine? Of course, I will run into Cillian. I heard a knock on the door, "You alright?" Bash questioned from the other side. I got up reluctantly and tied a towel around my body before I walked out. Bash removed his suit and the waistcoat. He was removing his shirt when I walked out. The room has a modern
Last Updated : 2023-12-16A TWENTY SOMETHING 37. GET OUT
HANA "You ran away from your marriage?" I could see Shalini's big brown eyes widen in apparent shock. She looked at her surroundings. Everyone is having their lunch, and no one is paying attention to us. She leaned closer, removing her ID card as though it was coming in her way. "Is that why you tried hard to get an on-site offer?" She asks me. I nodded my head and grabbed my water bottle. It's not what happened but it's Shalini's reaction that was making me feel like I was on adventure. "They didn't come after you?" I think about the question. They didn't come until Bash had cancelled Violet's wedding with Cillian. I don't know how to explain that. So I shook my head, saying no. "You did a very good job, you know that? You don't strike like a person who is going through a lot when people see you." I smiled at her words. "My friend, Ravali had married a guy her parents chose even though she wanted to go abroad for studies. That
Last Updated : 2023-12-18A TWENTY SOMETHING 38. ADULT TALKS
HANA | THEN I woke up to the shrill cry of my mom. I quickly ran down the stairs just to find her on the floor, her hand rested on her cheek while she stared up at my raging father in horror. "Get the hell out of my house then, bitch." He screamed at her and threw the bottle at her. It's a mess. I looked at the shattered pieces on the floor, and among them was my mother. My legs trembled when I walked to her. I just want to help. I slowly picked the shards before my mom got hurt more than she already was. "Go away," She says, still staring at the place where my dad stood before. "Mom, I just want to he..." "Get the hell away from here, Hana." She screamed at me, making me jump in fear. The first thing I did was to go to my sister's room. She was already awake when I opened her door. "Did Dad hit her again?" She asked me, her slender body quivering in fear. "No," I tell her. "Let's go back to bed. Do you want to hear a story about a boy with three
Last Updated : 2023-12-20
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A TWENTY SOMETHING 109. THE TIME OF WAR
BASH There's going to be a war and that's not the end of it. I am sure whatever breathtakingly stupid reason compelled Alessandro to kidnap Colton's daughter is going to cost all of us. When I looked at the girl who was hardly nineteen or twenty years old, sitting quietly in the corner of the room, feigning courage, all I could think was how familiar her eyes were, just like my bee's. "Why the hell did you bring her here?" I questioned Sandro. "We caught Romero. Her father tried to kidnap Mateo and failed miserably. It's a tit for tat." "Colton failed because I was there. I don't think it's a good time to play tit for tat." The girl in the corner sniffled, catching our attention. I walked to her slowly so that I wouldn't startle her. She shifted where she sat. "What's your name?" I asked her gently. "Luna." "Hana and Luna. Sisters indeed." Vincenzo commented for the first time. That's when the girl named Luna who was Hana's half sister
A TWENTY SOMETHING 108. NEVER NORMAL
HANA "I couldn't walk," I complained, sprawling across the bed. "You don't have to." Bash placed a chaste kiss on my cheeks before buttoning his shirt. After I asked him to marry me last night, Bash brought me straight home. We couldn't even make it past the front door before he was inside me, his thrusts urgent and intense. He took me on every flat surface. It felt like a sex marathon. I didn't know when I passed out after coming multiple times. When I opened my eyes again, he was inside me, his hands caressing my head. I was so satiated but when he looked at me with those intense green eyes, I begged him to take me again, my pussy hot and throbbing just for him, for my man, for my Bash. As a result, I can't even pee because my pussy feels like it's burning. Oh, God. It will hurt like a bitch for the next two days. But last night was incredible. That's all that matters. Watching him roll his sleeves, revealing the veins on his muscular hand made me hot and bo
A TWENTY SOMETHING 107. HOW I SEE YOU
HANA For Bash, to talk like an adults with me is him being inside me. I joke about it all the time, and I even got annoyed when he did that when we were discussing the most important decisions in our lives. But now, I missed that feeling of being filled up and conversing. I should have cherished them when they last. I shouldn't have avoided them before. Now the fear of losing that kind of bond gripped me. Now, he is sitting on the edge of the bed, his back to me when he asked me what happened in my old apartment. Now we are discussing like real adults when my body and heart craved what he attuned them to. I told him everything Jonathan disclosed to me. With every truth, his back stiffened and I fought the urge to reach out to him. A long whelming silence followed after I completed speaking. After what felt like an eternity, he got up and paced back and forth in the room. "So, Colton is your fucking biological father? He raped my mother, Hana. He abused her and drove her t
A TWENTY SOMETHING 106. BECAUSE OF WHO I AM
HANA I used to think that this life could not break me more than it already has. I am wrong. I always am. It can become worse and worse. I didn’t expect my dad, I mean Jonathan to show up at my old apartment. When I looked at him, I didn’t see him. I saw that hand raise to slap, I heard the yelling, I saw the shards of glass on the floor, and I heard the fights between my parents. That’s all he has ever been to me, a trauma. “You are making a mistake, Hana.” That’s the first thing he said to me. It’s either I am a mistake or I am making a mistake, never a how are you? I can’t blame him though. He lost the investment because I ran away from the marriage. I sucked in a breath, carefully taking a step back. “What are you doing here? How did you get in?” An ugly smirk spread over his lips. “Your boyfriend isn’t that powerful, Hana. He cannot stop me. He cannot stop Colton.” My father is many things, but he never ever trembled before someone. He has too much pride to admit that
A TWENTY SOMETHING 105. SOMETHING AGAINST HER
BASH I had a text message from her an hour ago saying she was going to her apartment to pick up some things. I called her immediately. She picked after the third ring. “Bash, can I call you again? I am in the middle of something?” She immediately said, her voice was breathy. “Where are you? Are you alone?” She paused and lied, “Yes. I came to pick up some things. I will call you later.” Then she hung up on me, making me ball my fists. SHE LIED TO ME. My chest rose and fell in erratic bursts, each breath heavier than the last at what I’ve learned till now. My fists clenched and unclenched at my sides. I look at David for one last time before stomping out. “Nice,” Sandro commented from behind. “If there’s anyone who can do that she is the one.” With a sudden, fierce motion, I grabbed his collar, yanking him off balance and slamming him hard against the brick wall. “What the hell are you implying?” Sandro’s lips pulled into a twisted smile. “I wonder what makes you lose
A TWENTY SOMETHING 104. XAVIER'S SON
BASH “What do we have here?” I asked Sandro who was clearly amused with me for god knows what. “You do realise that this isn’t a corporate meeting, momma boy?” Marco commented with a smug face. They are all wearing black as if it’s s uniform. But they gave me the vibe of goons in movies who nods their head to whatever a stupid villain says. I’ve just arrived from a meeting with Mr. Sato whom these idiots couldn’t know. It’s a waste of time to explain anyway. “You do realise that I can buy your men with this suit right?” I commented back. Marco sneered. “You can’t buy anything with money.” “Says the guy who failed to protect a kid and who kills for the very same money.” Honestly, everything these guys do is to gain some extra money in illegitimate ways. Although that could be wrong for men like Elio, Sandro and Vincenzo. It’s not just money they want. They thrive on bloodshed, power and control which are useless without money in my opinion. Marco raised his voice
A TWENTY SOMETHING 103. PROMISE??
HANA Calling him clingy is an understatement. He wouldn’t let me out of our bed for a second. All the food was served in my room. It’s been 24 hours since I had gone downstairs. 24 hours of blissful sex, food, chatter, laughter, and sleep. For a second, I wished the time to stop here at this second. I hop out of the bed, stretching my hands. I didn’t notice where he came from. In one swift motion, he tossed me on the bed, with him above me. “You are not going anywhere.” He says, grinding his hardness against my pussy. Less than thirty minutes ago, he was inside me, chasing his orgasm. But my need for him started to grow with every passing second. Wetness pooled between my legs. I don’t have the panties on. My shirt rode up when he tossed me on the bed, leaving me exposed for his sweet torture. “I am sore...Oh my gosh...” I didn’t get to complete the sentence before before he slide inside me. My eyes rolled back, my lips parted with the fullness. “You
A TWENTY SOMETHING 102. THE FUTURE
BASH “We need you here.” “Hey, hi, Marco. Good morning. How are you?” I drawled, sitting on the couch in my living room. “That’s how humans converse nowadays. Oh, I forgot. You aren’t one of them.” “He he he. Very funny, Cillian. I would have laughed if it was a good joke.” “I wasn’t joking,” I told him as a matter of fact. I heard him sigh from the other end and muttered something under his breath. If it was any other person, he wouldn’t have let that go easily. “We need you here. We brought someone for questioning from the Matri,x, and I have no fucking clue why Sandro thinks it would be better if you were here. You are the Capo’s son after all.” He muttered something inaudible and I’m sure he took it as an insult to make me involved in his torture session. But, I got the underlying message. Sandro always wanted me to be involved in their so-called regular lives to prove a point – that I’m not capable of being their Capo. This is true, why be a capo when I can
A TWENTY SOMETHING 101. NOW WITHOUT YOU
HANA "What the ....oh my god! How did you find me again?" I looked at Seb who was glued to Bash's leg, and tried hard to climb over him. "He is coming out of nowhere. He either wants my leg to climb up or my thumb to suck. Did you see this?" Out of these two, Bash was more complaining. I shook my head laughing at him. He likes to think that he is not good with kids but I think he would make a great partner in crime with the said kids. "How about we come to an understanding? You make a sound before you attack my leg because I'm scared that I'll hurt you. He feels like a pillow." "He can't understand that, Bash," I told him as a matter of fact. "Oh, he understands everything just fine." "He is just seven months old." "Really?" He took out his phone and showed it to the junior. "You want it?" He asked our Seb and he eagerly threw his hands up to reach the phone. "See. He understands what he wants to understand." Shalini watched everything sil
