6

ISABELLE’S POV

I look towards the door. It is still locked. No one came to open this. I don’t know how much time has passed since I am locked in this room. I don’t understand why Lillian has locked me inside the room. I think the sun must have set by now because I have started to feel cold. The weather is changing and winter is in its initial stages so it is cold at night but days are usually normal.

I feel like as winter is approaching the coldness inside me is increasing. There is an unknown thing freezing me from inside. I am feeling like a trapped bird in a cage that has wings but is not allowed to fly. The bird who was once free in the blue skies is now trapped inside the hard walls of the cage. I think soon my wings will be clipped too if things continue to be like this.  

Is there any purpose in life? Is there any point in living a life like this, the life of a trapped bird? Life is not meant to be like this. It is us people who make it like this. Life should be meaningful and have a purpose. It should be filled with happiness, not with the fear of the king or the sadness of being trapped in a cage. Sometimes I wonder how my life would be if the king had not attacked my village.

Sometimes when I look around me, my heart fills with thoughts about my captivity here. My heart cries on my misery. Why did this happen to me? Out of all those women in the village, why did the king capture me? Why did the soldiers bring me here? Was it all written in my destiny or was it God’s doing?

All the other slaves in the harem say that I should be happy, I am lucky, I should feel blessed for being treated like this but I only see my bad luck in this. Why are their thoughts so different from mine? I despise the very idea of being a slave but they want me to feel blessed about it. I hate their thoughts.  

In my one year of being here, I have never seen anyone talking about leaving this palace. It seems like they are happy to be in the palace. They are happy to be under the cruel king. I have never heard anyone saying that they want to escape from the palace and their life was much better than being here. All women here are happy. They consider this palace as their home.

What I understand from their situation is that they are blinded by the beauty of these big walls of the palace. They are blinded by the benefits of being here. I remember some months ago, there was a slave who was thrown in the dungeon for two days by Lillian. Her fault was that she had broken an important vase while cleaning.

When she returned, I asked her if she wanted to leave the palace. If she wants then we can both try to escape together. I tried to be friends with her. After hearing me, her reaction was not what I expected. I thought she would agree to escape with me. She started laughing at me. Her laughter continued for around two minutes. I was shocked by her reaction. That day her words made me realize that every other slave in the palace is not like me. They are happy to be here. They all have lost their minds.

She said that I am stupid and because I want to leave this palace. She said that this palace is much better than her village. She thinks this palace is much better than her home but what I think is quite the opposite. In my eyes, the meadows and the farms are much better than the big walls of the palace. The air of freedom which was filled with the smell of hay and animals, which I used to inhale every day is much better than the air I breathe every day being a slave.

The small room which I used to share with my little Lily and which was filled with lots of useless things was much better than this room. The cheap clothes which I used to wear were much better than the expensive dresses I wear every day. Only God knows that I can do anything to have my previous life back.

Tears appear in my eyes when the face of my father, mother, and Lily appears in front of my eyes. Where will they be? Had they escaped the village or did the soldiers capture them? Are they even alive? What if they are dead? No, this is not possible. This cannot happen. God cannot be this cruel to me. He cannot do this with me.

Please, God, I beg you. Please let my parents and sister be alive because if they are alive then there will be the hope of meeting someday. There will be the hope of seeing them again. There will be the hope of living together again. I will never let this hope die. I will get my life back. I will escape from this palace and will look for my family. I will go back to my village. I will search for them in nearby areas but I will find them. We will all live happily together again. No one can break this hope within me. My life will again be filled with happiness.  

The sound of the door opening brings me out of my thoughts. I am sitting on my bed with my knees against my chest. I look towards the door and wipe my eyes. I don’t want Lillian to see me crying. I don’t want to see the smile on her face. Ivy comes inside my room. Oh, So Lillian has sent Ivy. Tears again fill my eyes when I see her. She is holding a large tray in her hand.

Upon seeing me crying, she rushes toward me and sits beside me.

“Don’t cry Belle. Everything will be fine”. She tries to console me but I face away from her. I don’t want to talk with her. I know she cannot help me. I don’t want her to be worried about me.

“Nothing will be fine. As long as I am here, nothing will ever be fine in my life. I am tired of this life. This palace has snatched my happiness”. I say to her while trying to stop my tears. I wipe my tears with the back of my hand.

“Don’t cry, Belle. You should stop thinking like this”. She says sadly. I ignore her last sentence. I don’t want to discuss my views about this palace with her. The thought of Lillian enters my mind. I don’t understand what problem she has with me.

“Why did Lillian lock me here? I had done nothing wrong. I did whatever she told me to do then why did she do this with me?”. I ask her sadly. Only I know what I felt being locked here. I was scared.

“She did not want you to roam in the harem. King has returned today and there were greater chances of escape because celebrations were going on that’s why she locked you here. She thought you would get a chance to escape and if you escaped then the king would have killed her”. Ivy tells me sadly.

Oh! So, to save her life she locked me here. A question enters my mind. I look towards Ivy.  

“Tell me one thing, Ivy. I want you to be honest. Don’t you want to escape from this palace? Don’t you feel trapped here? Don’t you want to return to your previous life where you were free?” I ask her. Her expression turned into shock. I look towards her eyes to see any hope but I find none. Her eyes are blank. A sad smile crept on her face and she looked toward me.

I am having an inner feeling that I will not like whatever she is going to say next. Her expression says everything.  

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