LanceThe afternoon sunlight provided such bright filament strips into the crevices of the blinds and for a long moment, I have no clear apprehension of moving out of the bed and actually doing something. It’s still my day off at the café and I still have plenty of time to just slack off and be the lazy person that I want to be. I feel like I have no energy and that I just want to lay in bed all afternoon before going to my singing gigs. I just stared blankly at the strips of light that’s been trying to bring its brightness into this darker room that I am currently in.At first I was just lying motionless; my eyes were fully transfixed at the cheap chandelier that hung lazily on the ceiling and then back to the blinds. There’s really nothing going on inside my head for a while until a memory suddenly popped up out of nowhere. The tangy memories of my old life back when I still in high school just flashed before my eyes and it was like glass shards stabbing me in the chest. I didn’t wa
LanceCoffee shops are one of the best places to hang out and have a good conversation with someone but if there's one thing that I hated about coffee shops, that is it's where all of the long and poisonous tentacles of several networking companies thrive. It's where they spread their self-structured pathological lies in order to convince their victim into joining their company. A total scam. It became clear to me that I wasn’t set up for a blind date but I was set up for this bullshit of a scam.Networking companies are not bad totally and that’s only if you're at the upper line of the pyramid but if you're one down under, most likely the bottom of it, there's nothing bad like the spawning discrepancies and failures and lies at that. People are just investing their money for little to nothing in return.This was aggravating to me. Hitting the streets, my feet walked faster and faster asthough I was a galloping horse in a horse-racing. I didn’t want to look back even though I know th
Jayler"Here are your drinks.” I heard someone from behind and when I turn my head around, it was Lance holding a tray with our drinks in it. He gently transferred the drinks onto the table."Thank you." I muttered trying my best to have the best smile."Now that I've noticed it, why do you look so down all of a sudden?" Lance inquired his voice was clear but I didn’t even know he was talking to me.“That’s because he’s about to be expelled, something like that.” Kenneth spat and that’s the moment I realized Lance was actually talking to me. I kicked Kenneth’s feet under the table but he seemed unbothered by it. He just grabbed his Matcha and stabbed it with the straw.“What? Why?” Lance sounded shocked and I couldn’t even look at him in the eye because I know he’s a good guy and I’m just this messed up high school kid. I don’t personally know the guy and I’m ashamed that he has to know about my current situation.“It’s nothing really.” I tried brushing it off. Kenneth and his loose l
Jayler I stared at the address that Kenneth just sent me and it’s like they’re moving and glowing and just trying to lure me into going out. It’s still quite early and my dad’s not home tonight so it’s going to be a piece of cake to sneak out tonight. However, I’m still skeptical about this whole thing. I’m pretty much well aware that I have everything to lose here and this might just be the last resort that I have to do in order to not lose everything. I don’t want my parents to get horribly pissed at me. That’s for sure. I don’t really want my mom to be greatly disappointed in me. She’s been so strictly supportive for me and my older sister and although it’s getting annoying at times, it’s still worthy to note that she’s been doing her job as a mother almost like she’s born to do it. I don’t want anything that my dad would do to me and when I say anything I meant everything. My dad has some anger management issues and he’s just this dominant man that doesn’t want someone overpoweri
Chapter 17 - Jayler “Hey, stop right there!!!” A tall man with big muscles stopped me right before I could even reach the entrance of the backstage. The door was left wide open, nevertheless I couldn’t get a good look at whoever’s inside. “Uhm, sorry.” I trailed. “Backstage is off limits for customers.” The man followed up with his buffed up virile voice which sounded disturbingly terrifying. “I’m just looking for someone.” I muttered and deep down inside, I was already growing nervous and worried at the very same time. I guess I was feeling nervous mostly because this dude looks like he’s going to smash me just like a can of soda. The feeling of worry was just coming from the fact that I have no guarantee that I might see Lance tonight. The tall guy, which was probably a bouncer because he’s wearing a black shirt and he’s all made up of muscle, was just staring down at me with his arms crossed over his buffed chest. “Do you happen to know someone named Lance? Uhm, he’s a vocalist
Chapter 18 – Lance The world of being in a small band has been a dream of mine ever since I was in high school. And being the vocalist of August Thunder was by far the best thing that has ever happened to me. I say it’s the best thing that has ever happened because quite frankly, I’ve reached nothing more than that. Years have gone and passed and I’m still stuck here in this place where I was thrown into after what happened a few years prior. I really thought dropping out in college would make me a star and become this successful singer but apparently, I was just a naïve college guy back then. In spite of being in a small band like August Thunder, I felt like I’ve achieved my dream. However, I don’t necessarily feel like I’ve reached the success that I was envisioning several years ago, and even right now, I don’t see anything beyond this point. Yes, I’ve managed to reach my dream and that’s already a great feat in itself but that’s just one of the many dreams that I’ve dreamt of. I
Chapter 19 – Lance Walking out of the stage, I was still feeling my heart beating at an abnormal pace, almost like I’m palpitating but in a weird pleasurable way. The feeling wasn’t entirely foreign but it’s worthy to point out that the last time I felt this kind of bizarre yet elating feeling was years and years ago. I don’t know if I should be smiling from ear to ear most especially after that whole set of sad songs that delivered a heart wrenching hook with an intensely cathartic bridge, but I was kind of doing exactly that—smiling. I don’t want to admit this or even acknowledge the feeling but I feel like I want to go back to that stage again and just sing another lugubrious song consisting of an intense chorus. And perhaps—this might just be a temporary feeling, a mood per se—yet I just want to see Jayler stare at me again with those innocent, almost irreproachable and yet curious eyes. I’m sure of this because his friend was also looking at me, along with all the other folks ar
Chapter Twenty - Lance “Everything’s okay, Jayler. Don’t be embarrassed just because we’re not that close and also, I’m not going to judge you. I guess, I’m going to say this is a good space for you tell whatever’s going on.” I felt like I have no other choice but to hear Jayler out. I tried encouraging him not to be shamed about this situation when he came all the way here to ask for some help for whatever shit is going on in his life. “Yeah, I’m just really figuring out how to say this.” Jayler nodded and then paused for a while. He was already turning red but I’m sure that’s coming from the alcohol. “Go on, man.” There’s still a band performing on stage and the music is reverberating throughout the room. Kenneth and I are the only people who could hear him and even then, I still have to heighten my hearing sense to hear him speak. “I’m about to get expelled.” Jayler confessed spitting the words with such conviction like it’s been stuck within him all this time. I can hear the in
The three of them left Bradey who was enjoying the company of beautiful girls grinding with him. He surrendered to his bed and pleaded for the mercy of sleep to come and rescue him butit won't just come. He began thinking about what he said a few hours earlier, at first it sounded funny and even more insane but it could possibly be the solution to his problem. Dating a man.He was always open to the idea even before he met Samantha, but he couln't just take the risk without properly thinking about it, plus he wasn't gay at all. Day by day, he is losing every singledrop of hope he had to the point that he is starting to become desperate. The thought of getting old alone was squeezing his spinal cord; he never wanted to be left alone in this world like her mother.Richard was sitting taciturnly in front of his computer monitor, tapping away the keyboard, and while sipping some of the Matcha he bought from where he worked, he did not turned hisfocus away fro
After the kiss everything went crazily awkward yet it felt like doubled heaven. However there had been no clear apprehension of moving from sleep to consciousness or if he did ever had the chance to sleep at all. At first he was just lying around eyes wide open firmly fixed above the idle ceiling. Usually things always do sink in as swift as a blink of an eye but now it actually took about less than twenty-four hours for him just to fully process and accept everything that happened. It's sure is real and it was wild, hungry, ardent, and awfully wrong in a way yet he wanted it all.He needed every second of it.Not that he was regretting it or something but it sure opened the closet to the realization of how sexually confused he is. Jasper and Kenneth kept on asking him about when will he ask somebody out, or when will he fuck somebody and as a response he was just telling them words of wisdom. It was obviously hilarious but, even if you consider how smart he is, he jus
Kenneth's increasing excitement almost gave a successful infection to Jasper and Jayler, as soon as the lazy tattooed bouncer let them in without even having some second thoughts or even laying an eye to verify their legality, they started moving with the funky beat playing within the background. Clearly, even a nine year old kid could tell, they seem to resonate sheen light of minority within them though, in the most teenager sense of thinking, they dressed themselves plausibly in accordance and tried to be as oblivious as possible. They were successful about it, no one noticed and even if someone actually noticed they wouldn't give a damn anyway. They were just having fun and having fun means breaking rules, or at least that's how teenagers believe it to be."Oh lord I’ve got to admit I missed this damn place” Kenneth whistled.“Are you fucking kidding me Kenneth?” Jasper blurted in response while giving him a disbelieving glare.“Well, yeah I was here yesterday and the day before t
The long and tiring day finally reeled to an end, Richard arrived at his unit at exactly eleven pm with the thought of Jayler actually staying in, and as usual like yesterday and the day before that,there was no sign of Jayler to be found. He was not fine with it, he doesn't understand why or how did something like this be happening to him but he felt like just being with him soothes allthe sores of a tiring day, but he has to be fine with it, and of course realizing the mere fact that his shift ends at 10 pm, Jayler probably had gone home, he has some parents and a sister toworry for his safety. He has a family, a sweet thing that he had once. And this is Friday night, and Friday nights were supposed to be the youngest of the young nights for him, and even if heis already at the early stages of getting real old to this crappy life, he and his friends still have the finest time to seek pleasure with their party people mindset. The clamorous thought of feeling
Friday came crashing down like a tremendous blazing fireball of blessing, aside from the mere fact that Fridays were always a blessing, it was the last day of Jayler's three day suspension andafter that he can finally return back to school. He woke up very much delighted with the idea that it was all over at last, and, just like the fresh and lustrous morning light, his smile was the brightest.He took the shower with such ease and pleasure while singing some part of a certain song, humming happily into its funky and perky beats and later on doing some awkward dance moves.He arrived thirty minutes earlier today at Richard's condo unit, appearing quite youthful and reinvigorated as ever. Purely for his own amusement, in the high spirits of this stirring and exciting day,Jayler had been trying to act accordingly, keeping himself pulled together, as he found how endearing Richard could be, who based on the sole evidence of his bachelor upbringing have sethi
It was past ten before Richard arrived at Fidelitea. This was the hour when he found Fidelitea most lovable; the shop was not yet the busiest, the smell of fresh teas making its way to invadehis nostrils never failed to relieve his accumulating anxiety, and he was so eager to kick start the bright day with his indefatigable enthusiasm bolstered by the good night sleep he mustered.Though, a thousand of trembling hearts were beating restlessly in close proximity within this heaving ancient mall, and many of them, after all, would be aching in agony but his heartache wasfar worse than theirs. Considering all of the things, whether all of the good or the bad, that happened in his past, he was impotently reduced into nothing but an incapacitated marionette madeout of fragile skins and broken bones with a deplorable heart from stitches of mismatched parts from varying textiles that were scraped out from the anguishing memories of all of his past lovers.Strang
"What the fuck is that?" He mumbled quietly, precisely questioning what was that that he just felt earlier. His heart was still fluttering like a butterfly until now. The stare was still like the oddestfive seconds of his entire life, it was as though a moment from a romance series where the lead actor accidentally stared at his leading actress and the time suddenly went into a slow phaseof motion happened to him. This was, as far as he knows, the very first time that something like that happened and it was undoubtedly unexplainable that made his heart tramble, jerk and flutter.He walked out of the shower room then went to dress himself. Hardly aware that he had moved, he found himself lying motionless back in his own bed in which he had spent the latter of thecold night, slowly and lazily scrolling down onto his social media accounts. Fortunately, thanks to several groups of fandom that follows him, the girl who posted their kissing photos receivedmyri
Denny was promptly fished out from the short film of bittersweet memories that he was virtually viewing in his mind by a loud ring coming from his cellphone. He came to his sense and tardilypicked up the call. It was Bradey."Hello?""Where are you?" asked Bradey."At home, why?" His voice was soft and broken."Why you sound like that?" Bradey asked inquisitively."I'm watching Korean drama" Denny lied, he doesn't want to but it appears that Bradey doesn't remember that today is Jesse's death anniversary."Oh, I didn't know you watch those stuffs" Bradey knew that Denny hated dramas and he was baffled that Denny is watching Korean dramas."Now you know, now can you please spit the reason why you called because I'm really busy crying about this sick drama" Another lie. Denny truly hated dramas, too much that without beingaware of it, he became one."Er, I just want to ask help from you""Proceed""I'm calling here fr
Jayler decided to stay outside of the guidance counselor's office. He was quivery and unsteady; he kept on moving around, back and forth, doing random things that he thought might keephis nervousness down. Anxiety was sending several swift arrows of thoughts inside his brain. Can Richard make a good bargain with the guidance counselor? Will he be successful? Will hebe convincing enough to act as his uncle? All of it was softly and slowly killing the very most of him and the longer he waits, the more queasy he gets. Slowly, he was losing the dull light ofhope he have and was already on the verge of detaching himself from present towards the future of what will probably happen to him. Finally, the squeaking sound of an opening door awakenedand pulled him back to his sense."How did it go?" The uneasy anticipation of a good answer forced him to run instantly in front of Richard."Shush" Richard shushed him, pulling him into the farthest corner of the b