FOUR YEARS AGOCassiel was parked in front of the pavement of our dormitory building, waiting silently for me to go ahead and get inside safely. But I didn’t want him to go back yet. I can’t recall the last time a guy waited for me to get inside home safely.He gazed at me in silence with an intense look in his eyes. “Why are you waiting here? Don’t you want to go in?”I was standing on the pavement captivated by his blue eyes. I know that I wanted something, something more from him to remember this moment as pure, unembellished and whole. I wanted the moment to last forever and become infinite in my imagination.I leaned against the driver's side car’s window. “I really don’t know what I’m waiting for, Cassiel."“Have you forgotten your keys?” He scrunched his nose, showcasing faint freckles splattered on the skin and as my eyes traced them, I realised a small section of these orange-brown freckles were hugely evident on his cheekbones. "Can you do something about it?"I chuckled. “Y
PRESENT“Did you get those raspberries on your way home, honey?” Cass's voice reverberates throughout the entire house. He’s working in the kitchen. I can hear him rolling the dough with all the noises he’s making. "Or the pasta sauce I had put on our grocery list?"“No. I'm sorry, love. I forgot!" I yell as I draw the front door to a close. "You should have texted me that to remind me!" Then I exhale a sigh. "You know how forgetful I am, right?"I walk into the living room area to put my handbag, which also has my laptop down on the table. My phone vibrates as I get another mail from the magazine I work for, telling me that the work’s deadline is set in the incoming three weeks. I get another message from my boss to reassure me if I got the email.Yes, you snotty little piece of work. I got the mail. Just don't try to make my life hell!My head in the magazine company is doing this on purpose, in other words, adding to my workload because she wants to hire another part-time writer
PRESENTA few hours later, we are both lying on the floor with our backs against on the couch, eating the salad he made three hours ago, almost half-naked. The television is on at a low volume and it slowly hums in the background. Cassiel palms my breast accidentally while taking away a string of pasta sticking to the curve of my collar bone. The action shoots a pang of electricity in my entire upper body, travelling to the nerve endings and I inadvertently shudder. Then he moves his mouth to lick the bread crumbs still sticking on my chin.“Do you know I always had a thing for bread?"“Maybe you should travel to Germany. Do you know what they have in there?” I try to make myself sound more enthusiastic. "Germans love their breads more than French do, apparently.""Huh?" He shakes his head innocently at my statement. “What is there for me to see in Germany?"“A bread that resembles a vagina."“You’re shitting me, aren't you?” He shuffles his feet slowly on the carpet and leans right n
PRESENT“And what do you need me for?” I try not to snap at him. I keep it curt. Where the hell did this wife come from? Has he been married before? He never said anything about this person in all the days we have been acquainted with each other. "If you have a wife, why don't you hang out with her?"“I need you here with me so we can act like we are dating.” He’s so obvious and persistent in his answers like it means nothing to him. “You know I need you to get her out of my house.”“I can’t do that. I don't think that I'll be available. I'm sorry for saying this, but you need to call one of your model fuck-buddies who can help you out in this situation.” I mimic him in a sarcastic tone. Then I can't control my anger any longer. “And from where on earth did your wife materialise in thin air?” I take a deep inhale. “And why are you calling me? How dare you?”“Please, Lee. I absolutely need your help this time.” He’s taking a pause before he continues. “Melissa isn’t that important. She
FOUR YEARS AGOCassiel walked me straight into the mall, holding onto my right hand tightly as he walked ahead of me leading me through the crowd. I couldn’t even stop to breathe because he was hurrying me to a MacYum’s right around the corner. The mall was crowded and people were shopping to beat the holiday rush of Halloween. I saw four kids dressed as cute monsters and mad scientists running out of a costume store, probably as a marketing gimmick for increasing the store's holiday sales, rushing in our direction. One of them crashed right into my stomach as he was passing by us. I took two squeaky steps back in my boots but somehow managed not to sway.Cassiel immediately turned around at the loss of my fingers. “Are you okay, babe?"“Yeah-yeah, I am.” I put both of my hands on the kid’s shoulder as I stopped him in place as he just ran into me a second ago. “Are you okay, buddy?”The six-year-old kid chuckled and nodded his head. Cassiel came in and patted his head. Then the kid s
PRESENTThe roads are dark and the concrete shines in the night from the faint light that falls on them from the tall street lights at the end of every long block. I don’t know how I’ll make it back to our apartment without having an honest excuse ready when Cassiel questions me about my disappearance. What would I tell him if he asks me where I had been gone for the past three hours? Or who I was spending my time with for the hours I had disappeared? In a hurry, I left my cellphone on the kitchen table. What if he goes through my phone?But, knowing Cass, I know that he will not. But what if luck is not on my side today? Will he find out about my cheating and my despicable behavior? He won’t go through your phone. My brain answers for me. He’s not like you.From what it looks like given my present circumstances, I know that I have been unlucky for a while. That’s why I almost cheated on Cassiel, that’s why I have developed feelings for Daniel. And also probably why I can’t make u
PRESENTTWO MONTHS AGOI was coming out of one of the many expensive stores on Upper Fifth Avenue. I needed to help Jeff find a ring for Carrie. We were both walking around when Jeff tugged at my hand and pulled me to one of the window displays of this luxurious wedding dresser designer brand, Weddingly Beat, and there sat a glimmering white mermaid ball gown. I looked at it while holding my breath because it was so beautiful.“Hey!" Jeff groaned. Just look at that. Isn't it beautiful?"“Isn’t it beautiful?” I repeated his words. "It's more than beautiful. It's probably what all girls dream about when they are little."“It’s gorgeous,” he murmured in awe. “Carrie would look so unearthly in this."“Yes, you’re right.” I coughed as I added more to the conversation. “And not just that ... I guess she’ll even like it.” I threw in a humorous laugh. "It's difficult to match her unreachable standards."“You think so?” He gazed at the dress and then at me with a childlike innocence I had rare
PRESENT TWO MONTHS AGO “All right, all right.” The country singer put his hands up defensively. Then he pivoted to go back to where he came from. "I'm leaving. Are you happy, Angelique?" I nodded. "I can't be any happier." Halfway through his walk on the pavement, he pivoted to look at me, resting his right hand on his slim waist as he looked at me expectantly. “Well, I do have something to say." Then he licked his lips. "I need your help.” “What help?” I stood there awkwardly, gazing bewildered at him. "Weren't you just walking away from me?" He nodded back towards one of the men’s clothing stores on the right side of the street. “Help me find a tux?" “Why would I help you?” I narrowed my eyes at him. "I barely know you." “You owe me. Have you forgotten that?" He smirked at me as he ogled at my face. "Don't you remember that night from the karaoke bar?” He bit his lip, looking at my face for signs of recognition. He thought I’d forgotten all about what happened that night aga
TWO MONTHS AGOAfter smoking my drag, I stepped on it with the edge of my heels to kill it. I walked back to the store where Daniel was and joined him inside. He was doing some sexy leaning around one of the shelves of fancy dress shirts, and he stared at me as I walked towards him.“It took you a while, didn't it?” He raised his eyebrows as he gave me another brilliant smile. "Aren't you playing hard to get?""Playing hard to get with you?" I licked my lips as I blinked my eyes quickly. "What would I do that for? I have no feelings for you, so playing hard to get would be an absolute waste of my time."He ignored my comment as he opened his mouth to talk again."Do you smoke?" He eyed my lips cautiously. "Are you a smoker?""Yeah. I was taking a drag." Then I zeroed in on the store and took everything around me in. Little middle-class me would never have stepped into a store like this a few years ago. "Why are you always asking me questions?"The grandeur of the store blew me away as
PRESENT TWO MONTHS AGO “All right, all right.” The country singer put his hands up defensively. Then he pivoted to go back to where he came from. "I'm leaving. Are you happy, Angelique?" I nodded. "I can't be any happier." Halfway through his walk on the pavement, he pivoted to look at me, resting his right hand on his slim waist as he looked at me expectantly. “Well, I do have something to say." Then he licked his lips. "I need your help.” “What help?” I stood there awkwardly, gazing bewildered at him. "Weren't you just walking away from me?" He nodded back towards one of the men’s clothing stores on the right side of the street. “Help me find a tux?" “Why would I help you?” I narrowed my eyes at him. "I barely know you." “You owe me. Have you forgotten that?" He smirked at me as he ogled at my face. "Don't you remember that night from the karaoke bar?” He bit his lip, looking at my face for signs of recognition. He thought I’d forgotten all about what happened that night aga
PRESENTTWO MONTHS AGOI was coming out of one of the many expensive stores on Upper Fifth Avenue. I needed to help Jeff find a ring for Carrie. We were both walking around when Jeff tugged at my hand and pulled me to one of the window displays of this luxurious wedding dresser designer brand, Weddingly Beat, and there sat a glimmering white mermaid ball gown. I looked at it while holding my breath because it was so beautiful.“Hey!" Jeff groaned. Just look at that. Isn't it beautiful?"“Isn’t it beautiful?” I repeated his words. "It's more than beautiful. It's probably what all girls dream about when they are little."“It’s gorgeous,” he murmured in awe. “Carrie would look so unearthly in this."“Yes, you’re right.” I coughed as I added more to the conversation. “And not just that ... I guess she’ll even like it.” I threw in a humorous laugh. "It's difficult to match her unreachable standards."“You think so?” He gazed at the dress and then at me with a childlike innocence I had rare
PRESENTThe roads are dark and the concrete shines in the night from the faint light that falls on them from the tall street lights at the end of every long block. I don’t know how I’ll make it back to our apartment without having an honest excuse ready when Cassiel questions me about my disappearance. What would I tell him if he asks me where I had been gone for the past three hours? Or who I was spending my time with for the hours I had disappeared? In a hurry, I left my cellphone on the kitchen table. What if he goes through my phone?But, knowing Cass, I know that he will not. But what if luck is not on my side today? Will he find out about my cheating and my despicable behavior? He won’t go through your phone. My brain answers for me. He’s not like you.From what it looks like given my present circumstances, I know that I have been unlucky for a while. That’s why I almost cheated on Cassiel, that’s why I have developed feelings for Daniel. And also probably why I can’t make u
FOUR YEARS AGOCassiel walked me straight into the mall, holding onto my right hand tightly as he walked ahead of me leading me through the crowd. I couldn’t even stop to breathe because he was hurrying me to a MacYum’s right around the corner. The mall was crowded and people were shopping to beat the holiday rush of Halloween. I saw four kids dressed as cute monsters and mad scientists running out of a costume store, probably as a marketing gimmick for increasing the store's holiday sales, rushing in our direction. One of them crashed right into my stomach as he was passing by us. I took two squeaky steps back in my boots but somehow managed not to sway.Cassiel immediately turned around at the loss of my fingers. “Are you okay, babe?"“Yeah-yeah, I am.” I put both of my hands on the kid’s shoulder as I stopped him in place as he just ran into me a second ago. “Are you okay, buddy?”The six-year-old kid chuckled and nodded his head. Cassiel came in and patted his head. Then the kid s
PRESENT“And what do you need me for?” I try not to snap at him. I keep it curt. Where the hell did this wife come from? Has he been married before? He never said anything about this person in all the days we have been acquainted with each other. "If you have a wife, why don't you hang out with her?"“I need you here with me so we can act like we are dating.” He’s so obvious and persistent in his answers like it means nothing to him. “You know I need you to get her out of my house.”“I can’t do that. I don't think that I'll be available. I'm sorry for saying this, but you need to call one of your model fuck-buddies who can help you out in this situation.” I mimic him in a sarcastic tone. Then I can't control my anger any longer. “And from where on earth did your wife materialise in thin air?” I take a deep inhale. “And why are you calling me? How dare you?”“Please, Lee. I absolutely need your help this time.” He’s taking a pause before he continues. “Melissa isn’t that important. She
PRESENTA few hours later, we are both lying on the floor with our backs against on the couch, eating the salad he made three hours ago, almost half-naked. The television is on at a low volume and it slowly hums in the background. Cassiel palms my breast accidentally while taking away a string of pasta sticking to the curve of my collar bone. The action shoots a pang of electricity in my entire upper body, travelling to the nerve endings and I inadvertently shudder. Then he moves his mouth to lick the bread crumbs still sticking on my chin.“Do you know I always had a thing for bread?"“Maybe you should travel to Germany. Do you know what they have in there?” I try to make myself sound more enthusiastic. "Germans love their breads more than French do, apparently.""Huh?" He shakes his head innocently at my statement. “What is there for me to see in Germany?"“A bread that resembles a vagina."“You’re shitting me, aren't you?” He shuffles his feet slowly on the carpet and leans right n
PRESENT“Did you get those raspberries on your way home, honey?” Cass's voice reverberates throughout the entire house. He’s working in the kitchen. I can hear him rolling the dough with all the noises he’s making. "Or the pasta sauce I had put on our grocery list?"“No. I'm sorry, love. I forgot!" I yell as I draw the front door to a close. "You should have texted me that to remind me!" Then I exhale a sigh. "You know how forgetful I am, right?"I walk into the living room area to put my handbag, which also has my laptop down on the table. My phone vibrates as I get another mail from the magazine I work for, telling me that the work’s deadline is set in the incoming three weeks. I get another message from my boss to reassure me if I got the email.Yes, you snotty little piece of work. I got the mail. Just don't try to make my life hell!My head in the magazine company is doing this on purpose, in other words, adding to my workload because she wants to hire another part-time writer
FOUR YEARS AGOCassiel was parked in front of the pavement of our dormitory building, waiting silently for me to go ahead and get inside safely. But I didn’t want him to go back yet. I can’t recall the last time a guy waited for me to get inside home safely.He gazed at me in silence with an intense look in his eyes. “Why are you waiting here? Don’t you want to go in?”I was standing on the pavement captivated by his blue eyes. I know that I wanted something, something more from him to remember this moment as pure, unembellished and whole. I wanted the moment to last forever and become infinite in my imagination.I leaned against the driver's side car’s window. “I really don’t know what I’m waiting for, Cassiel."“Have you forgotten your keys?” He scrunched his nose, showcasing faint freckles splattered on the skin and as my eyes traced them, I realised a small section of these orange-brown freckles were hugely evident on his cheekbones. "Can you do something about it?"I chuckled. “Y