“Lilliana,” Queen Stella outstretches her arms, “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” she held me as a mother would, before releasing me and turning towards Elliot, “Mr. Lakin, it’s been a long time. I see you’ve added to your party,” she raised a brow, winking at Elliot. “You’re too perceptive, your highness,” Elliot returned with a smile. “Please, call me Stella. Follow me, we have plenty to discuss. Your friend can join us if he’d like,” she threw a warm smile over her shoulder, directed at Elliot. I moved back a little, walking slowly next to Elliot, “Is she talking about Chaos?” I whispered. “Mhmm,” he responded with a light nod. My mind was swirling with questions. How did she know with a single glance at Elliot? Xantha’s main castle was stunning. The exterior was a deep, almost black-blue stone with creeping vines covering a large portion of the walls. Crystal clear blue waters surround the base of the castle, flowing into nearby canals that traveled away from the ca
I’m not the kind of guy who cares to take care of Lilliana, but seeing her face morph painfully the more Stella spoke sent a knife straight through my heart. ‘It’s cause you have feelings for her, asshole,’ Chaos growled in my head, but I ignored him. I don’t need his shit right now. So what if I cared? It doesn’t change anything. Lilliana had been eerily quiet the entire ride to this house. Now she’s studying everything with an unreadable gleam in her eyes. I never knew the full story between my grandfather and Lilliana’s grandmother, but my father always said it wasn’t what it seemed. I’m not sure how to feel about the information myself, but it’s in the past. There is nothing we can do to change it now. ‘I’m almost certain you and I were switched at birth,’ Chaos mumbled. Ignoring his constant jabs, I opened the door, grasping Lilliana’s delicate hand in mine, helping her up the steps, and into the home. It felt unusually warm and inviting here, something I’ve not fel
Yesterday evening felt so real and so unreal at the same time. Elliot was being everything that I’d always hoped he’d be while Chaos had been even more sweet than he’d ever been before. I’m not sure I ever want to go back home. Home. The word feels like an alien concept. As unreal as Xantha feels to me. All my life, I’ve lived in hiding. Lived in fear that I would be found out. It bred a shame within me. Shame that I possessed magic. But here; I am free. It's such a foreign feeling. Going from feeling as if you were in shackles your entire life. As if your lips were sewn shut to keep the truth behind them. The weight that has been lifted from my shoulders alone makes it feel as if I can breathe again. “Would you like to explore?” Elliot questioned without looking up from the diaries. He’s been reading every page, hanging on every word, like he might find the answers that we so desperately need hiding within their leather binds. “That’s like asking me if I’d like to breath
I understand now why Elliot was so eager to sell his soul away. I feel numb, but not numb in a good way. The pain in my chest has grown, festering into a pain that is so incredibly awful, that I feel nothing at all. It’s there, in the background, but my body is giving up. My mind is exhausted. I’m at the point where I just want to shut down. “Kitten, my heart is breaking seeing you like this. What can I do?” Chaos whispered against my head. He’s been holding me since we came home. I’ve not uttered a word of what I’d seen. I couldn’t. It was as if the memory was locked away, the key thrown into the abyss. “Don’t let me go. Please.” I know it sounded pathetic, but I didn’t care. My entire life has been one giant lie and my father was at the core of it all. The man I’d idolized my entire life. The man I would have defended with my life. It was all a lie. “Never, kitten,” Chaos whispered, placing a finger beneath my chin to tilt my face up to his, “I’m yours. However you
“How are you feeling?” Elliot asked, closing the diaries and motioning me over to him. He was taking my request seriously, but I’m in no position to complain. I loved seeing this side of him. Soft. Sweet. Endearing. Even if it was fake. I shrugged, “I’m just trying to process everything I guess. It kind of feels like everything I've ever known was a lie and now that I see the truth... I don't know how I believed it all.” He grabbed me, pulling me down onto his lap, “Do you want to talk about it?” “Do you want cheese on your fries?” Chaos shouted from the kitchen. “What kind of question is that?” His chuckle boomed around me, “That’s fair. Cheese it is.” Elliot held me while I explained everything that I’d seen in the vision. His hand soothingly rubbed my back while also swiping away tears that fell from my eyes. Chaos brought all of the food out to us, feeding me in between sentences. Something about this felt so normal, while being so utterly bizarre. Six months ago,
“How did you find Xantha?” Stella smiled while tending to her garden. Her fingers moved skillfully atop flowers, breathing new life into them through soft light emitting from her hands. I was so mesmerized that I forgot to answer. Stella turned towards me, wiping her dirty hands against her jeans. I assume that she doesn’t even need to be in the garden to bring everything back to life, but Stella seems like the type of woman who appreciates the experience just as much as she does her magic. “It was enlightening.” She chuckled softly, “In a good way?” her brow raised, “Or....?” My lips pulled down, “Both,” I shrugged, remembering Elliot’s words from last night. Don’t cry, Lilliana. “I’m sorry that you had to find out this way. Your father was a good man,” Stella gave me a forced smile. “My father was a murderer.” Stella winced, but took a deep breath, “Let’s talk inside.” I followed Stella through the garden to a small greenhouse. She opened the door, and I was hit wi
The fake love didn’t last. I should have known it wouldn’t. I’d asked Elliot for something that he would have never given me willingly. Knowing him, he probably bit back vomit for that grueling forty-eight hours. I also should have known that he would leave. I’d fallen in love with a coward. That much was true when he’d told me he couldn’t do this anymore. “Lilliana. I can’t do this,” Elliot stated, the tone of his voice as cold as ice. “What do you mean?” I know what’s coming. I’ve known it for days..... I’m just not ready to admit it. I never thought I’d see the day when I didn’t want Elliot to leave me. Seven months ago, I would have easily shoved the boot Tessa left me up his ass and kicked him to the curb. Now the very thought breaks my heart in two. “I think I should go back to Valtarin....” Again, he’d said the words with no emotion. It shouldn't hurt. I've been preparing for this conversation. But damn, it feels like a searing hot blade to the chest. “Okay.” “Ok
Nightmare by Halsey(reprise) boomed all around us. “Take a shot with me?” I shouted over the music to Ezra. He still looked slightly uncomfortable being here. I'm not sure if it was me or the club scene. Probably both. “Sure,” he shrugged. We grabbed two shots, linking arms and tipping them back. Ezra looked unphased but I winced at the burn. “You okay?” “Did he hurt you?” Ezra leaned in, whispering against my ear. It was my turn to shrug, “Nothing I can’t handle.” He frowned, “That’s not what you’re supposed to say.” I grabbed his arm, pulling him over to a booth, “I don’t know what to say. I thought there was something between us. It is clear that I was wrong. That fucking hurts. But I don’t want to think about it. He’s not worth my peace of mind tonight.” Ezra studied my face before taking a deep breath, “I just want to make sure you’re okay. If it’s any consolation, he’s stupid and missing out on someone really special.” When I didn’t respond, Ezra le
“I think these may have been the greatest idea you’ve ever had,” I moaned, savoring the taste of another blueberry. My basket was nearing full, despite the fact that I’d eaten probably a hundred while picking them. Elliot had suggested we plant a garden full of fruit trees and bushes so that "we could relive meeting every day." Those were his words, not mine. The moment he'd said them, I swore someone had switched out the man I knew with some strange creature. “Aren’t all of my ideas superb?” Elliot quipped, watching me with a smile on his face. Standing on my tip-toes, I pushed a blueberry into his mouth, causing his eyes to widen, “See?!” “I’m just shocked you’d stick those dirty fingers into my mouth,” Elliot shook his head in mock irritation, “But the blueberry is delicious.” “Such a pain in the ass.” Elliot winked, “You knew what you were signing up for.” Sitting the basket on the wood, I pushed myself up onto the deck before flopping onto Elliot’s lap dramatica
A soft knock on the door startled me, “May I come in?” Stella whispered, holding out a tray of coffees. “Of course.” She held the tray up, “I brought enough for everyone. Chaos knows he’s welcome to hang out. In the open,” Stella raised a brow, pulling a coffee out and handing it to me. “He says he prefers to be closer to me. Apparently next to me isn’t close enough,” a soft laugh escaped my lips, “Inside of me is the way to go.” 'Don't act like you don't love when I'm inside of you,' Chaos quipped. I could imagine him wagging his brows at the double meaning. He's not wrong. In either respect. Though I couldn't fathom the thought of being intimate right now. Maybe ever if I can't figure out how to fix this gaping hole that I call my heart. She rolled her eyes, “So dramatic, that man.” I nodded in agreement as Chaos separated from me, narrowing his eyes at Stella, “You do realize that I can hear everything. Is it a crime to want to be inside of an amazing woman?” he w
Do you ever feel like your life is a series of moments threaded together, but one piece pulls away, unraveling everything as you know it? My father’s death created somewhat of a domino effect for me. I was like a rosebud. I had the potential to be something amazing, but without the proper nutrients, I would die before I bloomed. My mother had tried to starve me of everything I essentially needed to flourish. But in the end, she gave me the one thing that would change everything. I’ve been staring mindlessly out this window for what feels like a lifetime, but it couldn’t be more than a week. I've lost track of days, hours, minutes, seconds. None of that matters anyways.It’s stormed every day since he’s been gone. When I was a pup, the storms terrified me. I’d cry until Dallas relented, allowing me to stay in his room with him. Then, when he was gone, I’d welcomed them. Needed the sound of the thunder to fall asleep, like a baby needs a pacifier. Now, it simply feels as if it’s
“El..... It.... hurts,” I choked out, as pain spread through my body like wildfire. My body tensed up, feeling as if I’d been tased, “Di.... did I....do it wrong?” Elliot offered me a small smile. Even through the pain, I noticed his eyes were red and glassy, “It’ll be over soon, baby. You did perfect. Just, squeeze my hand.” Screwing my eyes shut, I focused on baby blues in the darkness, feeling the warmth of his hand while I waited for the pain to pass. Then, everything was numb. My body felt as if I were floating on a cloud. Warmth enveloped me as I opened my eyes. I felt different. Like parts of me were missing while simultaneously being filled with something new. Something better. “Fuck, kitten. I’m so proud of you,” Chaos praised in my head, “So fucking proud.” A choked sob escaped my throat, my eyes finding Elliot staring at me with his head tilted to the side. The glassiness was still present in his eyes. Relief flooded his features when I nodded at him, silently
I’m so close to destroying everything. This mortal Earth is nothing without her. It would cease to exist without her presence. Her eyes haunt me every time I close mine. I’d wrap myself in every variation of emerald, green just to feel closer to her. I underestimated that walking fucking garbage can. Cassius was a waste of space and a disgrace to our kind. He’s been on some sick power trip for hundreds of years, mingling with the lowest of our kind. After we figured out what he was doing, my father sent me to murder those who aided him in becoming who he is. It is forbidden to go against the laws in hell. Despite being demons, we are to follow the law of Hades and never stray. We abide by a strict code, where Hades has the final rule. It prevents literal chaos from ensuing. Without order and discipline, Hell would be a madhouse. But we each hold ourselves to a certain standard and it typically worked until him. He consumed unwilling souls, learning ways around the law to bene
TRIGGER WARNING: Mention of suicide Have you ever thought that you’d experienced the worst kind of pain, but really, it was nothing compared to the next thing? Or something that even follows that? In one moment, you think to yourself, ‘It can’t get worse than this,” but then, it always does? That’s what this feels like. Lilliana asked me what I thought would happen if she sold her soul to Chaos.... Would I feel our souls tearing apart? Would I feel the pain of rejection.... or would it be so much worse? Is she choosing him over me? “Elliot, you’ve been silent for what feels like a lifetime,” her soft voice broke me from my thoughts. “I....I’m not sure.” “Stella explained to us that Cassius wants to combine our magic. Light and dark. If I am the light magic, and Chaos is the dark magic; Do you think it’ll have the same effect? Will Chaos then become the stronger of the two of them?” Lilliana paused for a beat, “It has to be the same. Maybe better, because I’d be willing to g
I had a dream last night. I wasn’t here, in this cell anymore. I was back at the little, dilapidated house near my oasis. Everything was as it would have been. No broken walls or rotted wooden floorboards. It was a home with light and warmth. The little home felt like it was mine.In the background, the sound of a record player ticked. Like the needle wasn’t quite hitting the groove as the record spun, creating an eerie sound.I walked towards the sound, lifting the needle, and causing pure silence. The type of silence that created a ringing in your ears. It was too much. Was I all alone here? Carefully adjusting the needle, a soft, haunting melody began playing. When the party’s over by Billie Eilish I stood before the warmth of the fire, hearing nothing but the soft piano in the background of the song. Closing my eyes, I swayed to the beat, humming along with the words. The urge to dance with someone was strong, "Elliot, dance with me," I called out into the silence, turning
TRIGGER WARNING:SA Sleep never comes easy when you lose track of time. I’m officially unsure of how long we’ve been down here or what time of day it is. That goddamned light flickering invades the darkness every time I close my eyes. Drip. Drip. Drip. “Where are you even coming from?!” I screamed at the water slowly dripping, then disappearing into the concrete. “Are you yelling at water right now?” Elliot groaned, making me gasp. He’s been unconscious for what feels like forever. “Thank the goddess,” I scrambled over to the adjoining wall. My heart beat rapidly as I stared at him with pleading eyes. Elliot looked like he’d been through the wringer. Dried blood surrounded his mouth as well as dripped from his temple. He had bruise marks around his neck in the shape of hands. The rise and fall of his chest seemed labored with every breath. “Never felt better,” Elliot forced a smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. His icy blue looked like they’d lost their light, appearing g
Elliot looked at the ground before running his fingers through the mess of hair on his head. I stared, waiting for what he was going to say. The more I watched him, the more I realized how nervous he appeared. “The last few days without you kind of sucked,” his voice was low as our eyes met. I couldn’t fight the laughter that bubbled out. Shaking my head, I smiled, “I missed you too.” He relaxed, chuckling softly while shaking his head, “Just call me out like that.” My laughter died down as I shrugged, “If you’re going to tell me a truth. Make it the truth. Deal?” “Okay,” Elliot whispered softly, “Your turn.” “Are we making this a game?” “How about twenty-one questions?” Elliot raised a brow, watching my reaction. Before I could say anything, he read my mind, “I promise to be honest.” Heat flooded my cheeks, nodding slowly, “What’s your favorite food?” “Starting off cutthroat with that question I see,” Elliot winked, “A good burger does it for me. Extra pickles. Pepp