Leaving

Maddie.

Thirty minutes later, I had lost the most paying job that a high school graduate like myself could get in the island. My mother had done everything possible to get it so I could help provide for the family. Now I had lost it in seconds because I couldn’t control myself. She was going to kill me.

I didn’t know how I was going to get home and tell her everything. I left the main hotel building through one of the back doors and walked by the side of the building before heading towards the main gate. As I walked away, there were tears in my eyes and I couldn’t see clearly. Because of that, I nearly bumped into someone but he caught me. When I stood up straight and wiped my eyes, I saw that Nick was standing before me, proffering a handkerchief.

“Stay away from me,” I said.

“I’m so sorry about what happened. I can help you.”

“Can you help me get my job back?”

“It may be complicated because they have evidence on you but I can try. I can get you a job in another hotel. A friend of mine-“

“You know, I don’t need your help. I think you and your girlfriend have done enough. Just stay away from me.”

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

I rolled my eyes. “First, you wanted to cheat on her with me and now you’re denying your relationship with her. I can’t believe you. I had begun to imagine you were different but I guess Jerry was right. You rich men are all the same, disgusting pigs. I hope to never see you again.”

I ran away from him before he could say anything. When I reached the gate, it opened for a red car that wanted to get out. I stood aside so that the car could leave first. 

Had I stared closely at the driver of that car, I would have avoided a lot of bad things that ended up happening. Unfortunately, in that moment, all I could think of was leaving the hotel. When I was outside the gate, I cast one last glance at Memo resort and walked away, my steps slow and my heart heavy. I let the tears roll down my eyes without caring who saw them. I met a few people walking along the road. Most of them gave me weird glances but continued with going their way.

I went and sat in a café for two hours contemplating on my next course of action. Eventually, I decided that I would not tell my mother that I had lost my job immediately. I would first try to look for another one, and inform her when I got it. If she knew that I had messed up the job she had struggled so hard to get me, I’d never hear the end of it. 

I reached home when it was dark. My mother was seated in the living room when I walked in. she stared at me as I threw my backpack on the floor and removed my coat. My heart started racing. When I turned, I nearly got a heart attack when I found her standing right behind me.

She raised her hand but pulled it back down. “I feel like killing you,” she said, tears welling in her eyes.

I hated to see her sad. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

“Oh Maddie, you always say that when you do something wrong. When will you ever take accountability for your actions?”

“I’m so sorry. I’m going to find another job.”

“Stupid girl. Who will give you another job? If Memo resort blacklists you, you’re done for in this island.” Mother sobbed as she went back to sit on the couch. She picked up her scarf and used it to wipe her eyes. “Do you have any idea the lengths I had to go to get you that job? You have messed up your only chance to build a proper career, considering your education level. You were extremely lucky they accepted to hire you. What the hell am I going to do now? Will I take care of the patient or you as well?”

I sighed. “I’m going to find another job.”

“Nearly all my salary goes to your sisters medical and caretaking bills. How are we going to survive when you’re earning peanuts? If you get a job, you’ll probably get one in some rundown diner. That’s nothing considering how high the cost of living has become in this island.”

“I’ll figure something out.”

“What did that woman say to you anyway?”

“Who told you about this, mother?”

“I won’t ask again. What did she say to you?”

My mother looked dead serious.

“She said I was ugly trash.”

“That’s all. I wanted to slap you so bad. You lost your cool just because a woman said you’re ugly? Oh dear lord, if only I had known that you’d be this stupid. Go to your room. I don’t want to see you anymore.”

I couldn’t sleep that night. My mother’s words kept replaying in my mind so I got out of bed very early and left the house before she was awake. I went out and withdrew all the money I had received and returned home with it. It was a Saturday so my mother didn’t have to go to work. She didn’t yell at me when I returned because my sister was in the living room. I went and spoke to her for a while. She was very weak. 

I took the money to my room and separated it, putting a small portion in my travel bag. I had already packed my things during the night, having decided to leave the island and go and try my luck mainland USA. Although I barely knew the family my parents had left in Florida, I hoped they would help me. I resolved to go to Miami where two of my friends from the island had recently moved to. My mother was right. I was never going to get a good job when I was blacklisted by a big hotel. Big hotels hire people with great letters of recommendation from their old places and other authorities. There was nothing I could do for Memo to recommend me.

My mother lost it when I came out of my room and gave her most of my money and said I was leaving the island. My sister started crying and I nearly changed my mind but leaving was for the best. My mother wouldn’t let me out at first, but when my sister’s caregiver Abby said she could give me the number of her cousin who could help me, she relaxed. When Abby gave it to me, I left before my mother could change her mind.

I felt a great pain in my heart as I left my family and home. I had hope that things would be easier when I was in the mainland. I thought I could easily earn more and help my family live a better life but I had no idea what it would take. Had I known, I would never have left the island.