CHAPTER 38. MICHELSON POV FEAR crept through my mind like it was made perfectly for it, like it was its territory. I never thought I would drive as fast as that for her but I did it anyway, I was at the stage of going mentally deranged. At first I had thought that probably, I might not have listened to what she was saying or perhaps I was getting the message wrongly but neither of that was the case as I had heard what she was trying to say perfectly as a matter of fact, I didn't wait to hear it twice before dashing into her room and out as fast as I could. Nothing mattered at that moment, as I gave attention to what she might think if she saw me wearing another shirt, I had an excuse already in my mind in case she asked. She had tried standing on my way , trying to prevent me from leaving. "There is no way I am letting you leave this place." She said, sounding pissed at the fact that I wanted to leave. I had been furious, so furious that I shoved her out of the way. She looke
BRIANNA'S POV THERE was no way to explain how scared I had been about the whole situation. There was this fear that I had lost my child, for a while I had laid on the bed feeling less of the pain but drowsy at the same time. When I woke up a while later I turned to see Michelson by the window and his mother close to where I was at the bed. Mrs.. Trevor smiled at me and I felt a kind of relief, she wouldn't be smiling if the situation was awkward or bad. "Thank goodness you are awake." She said looking at me, as if trying to look at me to know if I was fine and everything was alright. I nodded my head to show that I was and watched as Michel walked towards where I was,at first I wanted to say something about that fact that he had been away but then I changed my mind as I didn't have enough strength to debate with him at that moment. When his gaze came to me. I looked away and faced the other side, my anger was justified and he deserved every bit of it. His look was dark, warm, e
MICHELSON POV THE Grandfather's clock in the wall dinged as I walked into the house all tired, weary and out if thought of another term to tell the state I was in. I stared at the clock that struck Eight a.m. it got me wondering how long I had stayed out for by her side cuddling her like a baby, Brianna and I had talked together for the first time without screaming at ourselves— In a way it clicked as Success in my book—and Ineas excited about the fact that we had taken out time to talk it all out, as a matter of fact she had fallen asleep right there against my chest before I sneaked out of the room. I knew that I had to do something different from what I was doing, I had to move away from Paula as much as I could but that was where the difficulty set in. A small smile came to my lips when I realized what Brianna had said about trusting me, she had likened it to one trying to commit sucide and my smile had not been about finding it funny rather at the fact that she was the only
MICHELSON POV A FAN whirled overhead as I opened my eyes and looked around the room, here was I again in the same situation, same mess I was trying to get myself out of. I heaved heavily, not wanting to look around as I lay naked on the cold floor, this was more than imagination as I was wild awake , this was something real. My pulse skidded to an awkward stop as I laid confused not knowing what to think or how I was going to get over what just happened. Unease poured into my bloodstream; it was indescribable yet I expressed it in every way possible, cutting through my soul like ice. I was so deep Into her , so far gone I couldn't let go no matter how hard I tried, just earlier I had come to her to end things and bring all this to a stop but yet she had left me in the same state I had come to her with, she had left my heart cold as ice. The air was still. The Indecision that I just made shook in my hands and I could see it from the way it trembled. My heartbeats raced deep wit
MICHELSON POV I WAS done with my little fling… Little seemed like an inappropriate word I could use to describe what me and Paula shared and the fact that we've been together for half a decade regardless it was how my heart chose to classify it at that moment. Here I was trying to change a new leaf, become a better lover – Yet It left me wondering if I was being casted for that role by Brianna. She wouldn’t see it that way, I could guess to myself, and I couldn't blame anyone or her because the truth was had been a total asshole to her. The readiness she had shown to want to change the situation was no longer there, the affection had once felt was not there again, and bar the moment we had at the hospital that gave me a kind of hope, I was starting to think the whole marriage situation no longer suited her. The fun was over for me now and I couldn't go back to it for a while once I opened the door right in front of me and stepped in, no more need to fulfill a few sexual fant
BRIANNA'S POV THE FACT remained that I couldn't trust him, though with the way he sounded I had the feeling he was speaking the truth. I knocked at the door waiting for her to reply, I was in the mood to speak to just one person and that was her, as there was no one I could speak to at that moment. I didn't want to talk to my mother as I knew what she would say, I swallowed the lump in my throat. I didn’t know how I would tell her about everything, I knew that this throb in my heart would be worse than any physical pain if I trust him again but at the same time he had sounded genuine. She watched as I walked in, turning to look at me dropping her knitting set. "Brianna, how are you doing …how are you feeling now, hope you are feeling better now?" She asked. "I am, I just feel the need to talk to you." "What Is wrong with you?" She looked worried as she sat up. "Nothing much, I just want to get an advise from you." "Sure you can tell me anything what is making you worried?"
MICHELSON POV I WALKED into the room shutting the door with a quiet click behind me, careful not to make a noise, I could have sworn that I heard her talking to herself before I walked in but now she was I was confused about the fact that she was asleep or at least pretending to be asleep. Awareness brushed my skin from my head. I Walked out of the room earlier to clear my head. Also, I had some emails from my secretary to reply to without delay so as I got in and turned off the light switch again, I walked out of the room. I had one question on my mind centered around what I really wanted, though that was already answered. The fact that Paula had been calling me over the last couple of hours and I had been rejecting her calls was in a way making me rethink the entire situation. Out of the options in mind, I narrowed down the various ways I intended winning her over with. The thought of vacation and having our long awaited honeymoon came to my mind, but there was all uncertainty
BRIANNA'S POVI MUST had slept hungry, that would most definitely be the fact because I and woken up hungry the next, I couldn't remember how my sleep had gone– The last thing I could remember was the fact that I had pretended to be asleep when he had walked in and I guess it was convincing enough because he walked back out almost immediate, heavens knows where toA felt a sharp pain in my neck as I cracked my neck, my neck aches badly and I could guess I must have sprained it while curled up on my bed to sleep the previous night.Sunlight filtered into the room in bright rays, lighting up the room till it was almost a perfect picturesque. I could pick out every tiny particle in the air as it shone as though they were tiny gold dust.The scent of cooked grilled meat filled the atmosphere, reminding me that I had missed dinner and was now most probably hungry.My mouth watered as the smell of the grilled meatreaching my nose. I wondered if one of the maids was it again, but it was
BRIANNA'S POVHow fast was it to stop loving when it turns toxic?For me as fast as my heart beat in seconds.It had taken me nothing to make up my mind, perhaps two weeks of locking my door against myself and crying till I could feel my eyes go red with burning tears.This was not about compiracy but I was prepared to get through everything…As a matter of fact I wanted half of everything as well.Half of his wealth was going to make me obviously one of the richest female in the city and in a way it wouldn't affect him.For the next couple of hours all we did was talk about what I wanted—Which was to get away from the marriage as fast as I could.She has talked about it being more longer process and for all of cared I was ready for how messy it was going to become.Every part of me wanted to stay away from him.He was toxic this man, seeing him this morning reminded me of how much I hated him, it was quite a remindwr of why I wanted so bad to stay away from him.My husband was only
Michelson POVWhat in the hell I was doing. I thought to myself at the last-minute.At that time I was heading down the road, far away from where anyone could see me, it looked like I was drifting down the bowel of hell in my mind.There was a need to stop. I had to bring everything to a stopI tried to hit the brakes on the car.Fuck…I kept on pushing the brakes but it didn't work.All of a sudden I was starting to regret the fact that I decided to go down this path, I was regretting doing this at all as it felt like a very drastic action.What am I doing here?It felt like I was visiting another world, as the city passed before my fresh eyes as I drove deeper.I kept hitting the brakes as the car sped through, going off on the road with the same speed I had started with.As I neared the dead end , I thought about getting out of the car.The belt seems jammed, the door -I felt the wind in my face as it looked as though I was about to embrace death.Just then at the last minute,
MICHELSON POVWasn't it said that good music heals the soul?The music playing softly through the stereo was in a way depressing and there was no way to say why it was this way.I had picked that same music, I had always picked out any other days but today it did look like I was listening to a totally different song— It was like I was listening to it in a different way or perhaps hearing the tunes of the music differently .Either way I was not enjoying an but of this and in a way the way she was treating me was quite expected.The more I tried to take my mind away from all of this the more it became dawn on me that I might as well be a murderer.With own hands, I had committed this attrocities.In a way i wondered if she would ever forgive me, I would give anything as a matter of fact everything just for her forget everything but even to someone totally deranged that would be quite impossible.There was only way I could get my mind off all of this, and that was for me distract mysel
BRIANNA'S POVThere was only one word for how the past week had been and it was —Shambles!One could say I was a living shadow of my old self, and thanks to Michel he had totally out done himself making a mess out of me.That was what was, a total mess…I had dragged my feets through the tiled floor, ignoring the looks I got from maids and the greetings as well.The past one week had been nothing but hell for me as I was trying everything I could do with the situation at hand.The way the sun felt on my face, the fresh air—The taste of coffee like I had always loved it every morning, everything felt to me new.“Are you fine ma'am. ” one of the maids asked.Something in me whispered that she was not only asking for the state of my physical look but also how I was mentally as well, the whole feeling gave me goosebumps."Yes I am.” I replied , faking a smile. The truth was I wasn't, as a matter of fact I was far from being fine but like they say the truth is always a hard pill to swal
MICHELSON POV.What did I feel ?Pain!Absolute pain and there was no way I could get over it.Men are allowed to feel pain too ain't they?Mine was like a hard blow to the heart, I could feel every bit of my heart, stop then pause like this wasn't essential and just when I thought everything might be as well over, I felt it beating again.It looked like I had brought nothing but destruction Into her life, slowly I tried to play everything again at the back of my mind.If there was anything she hated more that moment it was certainly me.It was something, she didn't even need to say as it was glaring in her eyes.My face was inexpressive…Yet one Could tell that everything going on deep down inside me was absolutely shambles.Till now the only two people that knew about what truly happened was Brianna and myself and in a way I wanted to remain this way.The doctor ushered is about so she could attend to her, I took that time to take a long stroll around the hallway, stopping at the wat
BRIANNA POVIT looked like he was keeping the rest of the words buried from fear of speaking or getting how I would react.He looked at me for a minute not knowing how he was going to react to every bit of everything that was going on.When the words fell from his lips, I could feel the heavy weight of them."The baby is gone."At first I thought the words were just my thoughts playing out and he had not said anything, but when I thought about it again, I could hear the words playing again at the back of my mind."What?"I looked at my mother's face hoping it had something different…an emotion that would convince me this were lies.My heart beat shattered, and I could every bit of the piece and piece of my heart as it fell to the ground.The pain sent a raw ache through my chest and I could feel it pounding against it.My vision blurred behind tears and the shimmer of the sun on the marble floors, I couldn't hold it.One could numb any other emotions but certainly not pain, there was
BRIANNA'S POV.I Turned and saw him sitting right there, it was the last place I wanted him. As a matter of fact, I didn't want him anywhere around me.“Oh my god. You’re alive... She is alive! " He exclaimed as I stared around for a minute wondering what it was about him that I hated and disdained most at this moment.He glanced at me, a glint in his eyes filled with excitement. “I thought I was going to lose your"Perhaps, he shouldn't have said those words as I felt my memory returning back to me in full force.I felt a sharp pain in my head ...Staring at his face blankly at the moment, it was like staring into the face of the devil.If there was anything I wanted most at that moment, it was certainly having him closer to where I was.For all I know, I was done with the man.He tried to touch me but I took my hands away from where he was, flinching the very bit like his touch was toxic.As a matter of fact it was toxic, at least to me...I could feel the venom in his touch crawl
MICHELSON.Leaning back, against the chair in the hallway, I rested a forearm on the arm of the chair looking around at the events unfolding as I focusedmy gaze on the far end of the room.The anger In me was enough to raze down the entire room but I did well enough to bury it down as it burned in my throat and heart maring everything else in the process.My eyes skimmed up an inch to find the doctor again, a moment earlier she had insisted that I went back home after I returned there.The plan actually when I had gone home was to rest,take a fresh nap, eat and come back by morning but I couldn't do any of these things as I kept tossing and turning on the bed.The night was promising to be filled with nightmares so at the last second, I had dragged myself out of bed and now I sat in the hospital hallway wiping a hand across my face.My gaze darkened,conveyed every bit of my thoughts.In a way while I sat back in my chair, my humor was fading into the half empty hallway.My though
MICHELSON.THEY say real men don't cry and I wondered if emotions were really part of what made up the term manhood.I could remember just two times I had broken down to tears in my entire adulthood life:The first, was when I lost my fath.The memories still filled my mind like a scar that would never leave and I could still see it in my nightmares.This was the second time…It got me wondering how long I was going to get out of all of this if anything ever happened to her.Never, never was the right term to tell myself that I might never get out of this mentally if anything did happen to her.I paced the hallway worried and in a state that was quite tense.I felt the need to do everything and at the same time, I felt like doing nothing other than just walking through the white hallways of the hospital.Pausing by the dispenser, I grabbed a dispenser and gulped down two cups in quick succession running a hand through my hair that was ruffled.I was in a state of total mess both phys