Novels by themostindecisive

I didn’t mean to raise my hand that day—the first time I caught her glaring at me with her beautiful brown-ish eyes. I was just yawning, stretching my arms, and about to go back to my seat when the teacher called my name to answer that Math flashcard. I can’t buy sweets for my sister because Mama doesn’t want us to talk with her or even go near her, so I was kind of happy and excited about that cheap chocolate. It was supposedly for Nish but when I saw her crying, I impulsively asked our teacher to give it to her.The fact that she’s a girl, I can’t help but panic and unconsciously put Nish in her shoes. What if she was my sister, would they have the same reaction? I don’t know why she hated me since that day but I didn’t bother to know the reason. I don’t care. At first, I don’t give a d*mn about it.Kahit palaging galit at nakasimangot sa tuwing magkasama o magkatabi kami, ang ganda pa rin talaga niya. Matalino pa! Masungit nga lang. Gusto ko talagang makipagkaibigan sa kaniya kaso a

Sa kabila ng lahat ng mga nangyari—simula noon hanggang ngayon na bumalik siya matapos mawala ng maraming taon, bakit nga ba ako umasa na hindi nagbago ang pagtingin niya sa akin? Bakit hindi ako nagtaka, na kahit hindi maayos ang paghingi ko ng tawad sa kaniya ay umakto lang siyang maayos na ang lahat sa amin, na para bang noon pa man ay malapit na ang loob namin sa isa’t-isa? How come he didn’t pushed me away when I tried to reach out to him? Everything went too fast, pero hindi ko agad naisip ang mga ‘yun dahil masyado akong nalunod sa bugso ng damdamin ko; Masyado akong nagpadala sa kat*ngahan ko.Dire-diretso akong pumasok sa bahay niya upang kunin lahat ng naiwan kong mga gamit. Wala na rin naman akong dahilan para bumalik pa dito. Wala na kaming dapat pang pag-usapan dahil sapat na ang nadatnan ko ngayong gabi para magising sa kahibangan kong ‘to. Kung ganito lang rin naman, mas mabuti nang lumaki ang anak ko nang walang kinikilalang ama. I’m going to keep the baby with or witho

The following days went well although, going back to my old routine—my life before Alessandro and I decided to live together doesn’t feel the same as before anymore. Like what we have compromised, we settle for texts and calls. But it makes me miss him more, it makes me want to see him and feel him so I keep making excuses to shorten the duration of our talks. Ayos lang naman no’ng una, pero no’ng napapansin kong palagi na siyang matamlay tuwing nagtatawagan kami at hindi niya na rin halos binabalik ang mga texts ko ay nalulungkot na ako. He’s obviously making time for me, pero anong ginagawa ko? Sinasayang ko ang oras niya imbes na ipagpahinga niya na lang ‘to.Getting up to get ready for work wasn't as refreshing as my usual weekday mornings with him. It feels like something’s missing doing things even if I’m used to doing them alone. It’s just been a few days yet I’m already longing for Alessandro’s warmth; I miss him.Unlike before, nagluluto na ako sa umaga upang makapag-almusal

Since none of us dared to start a conversation on our way home, the whole ride was painfully quiet; Both of us had our eyes on the road although, I was the only one who was watching the cars ahead of us like a fool. I couldn't stand how awkward it was, but I tried my very best to keep my mouth shut. I don't even have the right to at least lighten up the mood because in the first place, I was and I still am the reason why the atmosphere between us is uncomfy.I didn't refuse his proposal but my response was neither of "yes" and "no"—it was a "sorry", it turned out to be an apology when it wasn't suppose to be like that. Ang nonsense pero mabuti na ring wala akong naging matinong tugon. Magulo pa ang isip ko ngayon at ayokong pagsisihan kung anumang maging sagot ko kung sakali."That's alright, you don't need to be sorry. I understand." That's exactly what he said as he downheartedly nod his head and just pulled me close for a hug. I doubted that but then he genuinely looked like he wasn

We already dine like this before but right now, the atmosphere is way different than the last time. Something’s up, I can feel it. Naguguluhan man sa kung anong nangyayari ay isinantabi ko na lang muna ang pagtatanong at nagsimula na kaming kumain.Halos mapapikit pa ako sa sobrang sarap ng pagkaing nakahain sa harapan ko. I dramatically point a finger on my food as I chew. Siya ‘lagi ang nagluluto ng pagkain namin sa bahay niya kaya hindi ko na kailangan pang mag-isip, siguradong siya ang nagluto nito. Hindi ko alam kung sadyang talento niya lang ‘to o talagang ipinanganak siya para sa ganitong purpose, e. Jusko, ang sarap!I heard him let out some soft little giggles.“You like it? That’s one of my specialties.”I slowly nodded. “God, Alessandro… Please cook for me for the rest of my life,” I muttered in awe.I’m not good and I don’t usually give comments about what I eat since I often drink coffee the whole day instead of having an actual meal but every time I taste his dishes, I a

“Kung alam ko lang na iiyak ka ng ganito, hindi na sana ako nagkuwento. That’s why you were so mad at me when I tried to avoid the Migz question, wasn’t it?” He pecked on my forehead and then pulled me into a hug, letting me lean on his chest as he caressed my back as if it was his way of calming me down. “Alright, apology accepted. But all of that… It’s already in the past now, okay? Tapos na ‘yun. Let’s just focus on what we have today, hmm? Tahan na.”Okay, maybe it’s all already in the past but it won’t ever change the fact that it happened. How narcissistic of me to think that he was a threat to me when it’s actually the other way around; I was the one who was a threat to him. Siguradong nakadagdag lang ako sa sakit ng ulo niya—dumagdag lang ako sa pinagdaanan niya. At sa kabila ng lahat, ni isang beses ay hindi ko siya narinig na nagreklamo. Hindi niya ako sinisi at sinumbatan ‘gaya ng ginawa ko sa kaniya noon at nagawa niya pa akong patawarin ng basta-basta. Hindi naman sa ayaw