Love Is Selfish

Brett walked into his sitting room with a file he pushed over to Derin, who had come visiting.

"You were scarce throughout Thursday, how much success did you record with your adventure?" Derin asked, picking up the file and flipping through it.

"An adventure indeed. Success rate was way better than I'd thought it was going to be." Brett replied, taking a seat.

Derin's eyebrows went up and he shook his head. "Of course. Why would I have thought anything less of you. Do you mind telling me how it went though?"

"I got her to agree to be my date to the fundraiser tomorrow." He finally replied.

"No way! How did you get her to do that? Wait! You are a magician now. You waltz back into her life, get her trapped in an elevator just to have a moment with her and somehow you get to convince her to go on a date with you. Wonderful! You are a genius Lex." Derin grinned.

"It's not a date officially, but it's something I guess. I'm gradually walking my way back to her and at this rate, I'm willing to do anything it takes."

"Daisy is strong-willed. How did you get her to agree?"

"Just my natural charm, I guess."

"Oh please." Derin cut in, pushing to his feet and heading to the mini bar across the room.

"I almost cried blood Dee. It was a case of I'm never leaving without a sign. I'm glad I managed to get something out of the whole stress."

"And you think she's your best bet at the fundraiser? People won't misinterpret your appearance together as something else?" Derin filled two glasses with martini and slid one to Brett.

"I won't mind the misinterpretation, honestly."

"And Daisy, she won't mind as well?"

"Damn Dee! What's with the interrogation?"

Derin dropped his glass and raised empty hands in the air. "Just trying to be sure you know what you're doing and cover bases while at it. We won't want a lawsuit or it's like in the future. Daisy's best friend is a badass lawyer and she's a feminist." Derin pointed out.

"What does being a feminist have to do with this? I'm a feminist too and I don't see anything wrong with that."

"Nope..... Brett Lexington, cut that crap. You are a Feminist, only when it's convenient for you. Why do you even want Daisy back? That girl is doing so well for herself without the distractions and now you want to waltz back and kick her off her feet. Why?"

"I...... I need her....."

Derin laughed at the look on Brett's face. "Go on." He urged.

"When she broke up with me, I thought she was just reaching. I was an asshole back then. I was attracted to her. In fact, she's the longest relationship I've ever had. She cared for me, genuinely and she was ready to listen to me. That was mostly what she did when we were together. She listened to the little crumbs of information I gave out. She loved me, but you know how much of an asshole I am. I kept pushing her away." He chuckled dryly. "When I found out that I was falling for her, I became scared. So, I ran off. I've never had someone shower me with such a magnitude of love. It was terrifying, even for me."

"And now?"

"I saw her at the Lex building."

"What! She saw you?"

He shook his head. "She didn't. But seeing her was all that I needed. My heart literally skipped a beat or two." He took a sip of his drink. "She was perfect and was smiling with some man that I wanted to strangle at the spot just for touching her arm." He laughed softly. "Dee, can you imagine that?"

Derin nodded. "I can understand that feeling." He replied.

"I was in love with her years ago and I'm still in love with her. I want everything she gave me then. I'm ready to commit, if she would have me."

Derin leaned back and propped his feet up on the center table. He was going to get so much shit for this. Even if Brett didn't say everything at once, eventually, he would get it out of him anyway.

"Your plain honesty always baffles me. In other words, you're saying you chickened out before because you couldn't handle the way she loved you and now, you want her back because you're selfish."

"That's a mild way to summarize what I did to her though. It doesn't sound so bad hearing you summarize it like that. I just hope Daiz walks with a summary close to that. I hurt her so much that I was shocked when she didn't hit me with something in the elevator."

"Wanting her back now isn't such an amazing thing, Lex. You're just being selfish. She can't be the same person from years ago. She might not be able to give you what she freely offered you years ago."

"Yeah, I figured. But that's okay too. Meanwhile, why do you think people want to remain with their partners, if not for selfish reasons. Someone can be willing to stay with a cheating partner because they know how to prepare a meal, they are homely, they are understanding and attentive to their needs etcetera. They might not say it in plain sentences, but it's the truth."

"Hmmm, I can concur with you on that. I once had this client that was willing to forgive his cheating partner because according to him, she gives him peace of mind. One day, I kind of probed him about this peace of mind he keeps talking about and you won't believe that the peace of mind was just the wife being good in bed, accommodating and a good cook as well." Derin laughed.

"I told you. In the end, it all boils down to our selfish needs."

Derin shook his head, grinning. "Yeah. But you know it's not all that. Some people have their bad side too. But being loved by a selfless partner makes it all worthwhile, don't you think?"

"No, I don't. But if it makes you feel better, then it's okay to believe the point you're trying to make."

"Lex, come on....." Derin took his feet down, went over to the bar and refilled his glass of Martini. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying in such a case, all that is required is to check the reason you're in the relationship in the first place. If the benefits outweigh the other, then you stay."

Derin burst into laughter. "Well, that's really a small way of seeing love, but I understand you. So, if she asks why you're bent on getting her back, what will you say? Will you play the whole honesty card with her?"

Brett scratched his head lazily. "No man, I'll just stick with the peace of mind line."

Derin smiled and leaned back in his chair, trying not to laugh. "Dude, that's my client's line."

He shrugged. "People borrow lines all the time. I'm sure your client won't mind. Dee, the peace of mind line is a way better option. At least I would still be telling the truth, but with complex sentences."

"So, to recap. you made some serious tough decisions just to get back to an ex you put through a lot years ago. You want her back because you're selfish and the good thing is you've happily admitted to being selfish about what you want." Brett nodded. "And you’re just hoping that after tomorrow, she'll decide to give you another chance?"

"Yes."

"Hmmm. what if she doesn't?"

"Then I'll sit back and re-strategize. Whatever it takes Dee."

Derin crossed his legs over the other. "What can I do to help?"

"Work up a subsequent plan in case this one fails."

"I thought you had backup plans?"

"Well, with Daiz, I need more than just one or two.”