KADEN’S P.O.VMy mind felt like it was being split open, like someone had put their hands into my skull and was trying to tear my brain in two. Everything burned, everything hurt and it felt like I was watching from outside of my body as my own hands choked the life out of her. I couldn’t move, couldn’t stop the calamity that was about to happen until I heard her voice in my mind, soft and coaxing. I wasn’t sure how she managed to break through that haze in my head but she did and I felt it snap. My hands released her and she fell to the ground. I stared at what I had done in horror. She was breathing but barely.“You did so well, Kaden,” I heard Natasha say from behind me and fury bubbled in my chest like a raging inferno. I turned to her and she wasn’t even looking at me, her eyes were fixated on Amelia’s unconscious body on the ground.I slowly walked over to her trying to rid my eyes of the image that was permanently seared beneath my lids, the image of my own mate thrashing in my
AMELIA’S P.O.VThe drive to the hospital was quiet. I could feel Caleb and Clara’s eyes on me. They held varying degrees of pity and worry but I couldn’t even look at them. The moment we arrived at the hospital, I was out of the car. They tried to follow me but I ignored them and heads straight for Dr. Brown’s office. None of the nurses tried to stop me, they all recognized me easily from all the times I had been here with Kaden. I felt their watchful and curious gazes but I ignored it.Without knocking, I pushed open the door. Dr. Brown was furious to say the least but as soon as she saw me, all fight deflated from her. “Are you alright?”I nodded. “I need you to check and ensure nothing is broken. Then I also need you to make sure no one comes into my room tonight, I want to be alone.”“Amelia-”“Can you do it or not?” I snapped. I knew she was not the reason for everything that happened but I was on a tight fuse already and she was making it worse by not answering. “I don’t need yo
AMELIA’S P.O.VI was released from the hospital after two days. I had a feeling the only reason I stayed that long was because of Kaden. For some reason, he seemed insistent on keeping me away. I knew he was trying to fix what he broke and sometimes, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe we were beyond repair. He had been so busy with the pack work that he had abandoned but he made time to be in my hospital room every night when I thought he was asleep.“What are you looking for?” Clara asked when she noticed me looking around the hospital while she signed my discharge forms. I gave a dismissive shrug but she could clearly see through it. “We asked him not to come. I thought it would be easier for you if he wasn’t here today.”“He actually agreed to it?” I shot back and she nodded but I didn’t believe her. Kaden wouldn’t just agree, it wasn’t in his nature and I couldn’t shake off the feeling of eyes on me. Kaden was in the hospital and although I could not see him, I could feel him.Wh
AMELIA’S P.O.V“I’m sorry,” he apologized profusely before stepping aside.I tried to hide the small smile on my face as we made our way in. She held onto my hand and I was greeted with the smell of paper and ink. It was a rather distinct smell and wasn’t what one would usually enjoy but I loved it because it reminded me of peace and tranquility. Once we were away from the guards, I turned to her.“Thank you, you didn’t have to do that for me,” I whispered. “I would have just left. I am truly grateful.”“Please, you are Kaden’s mate, I would do anything for you,” I tried not to let my disappointment show but she saw it. “Ah, I can see that look. You are doubting your relationship after everything that happened.”“You heard about it?”“Darling, the entire pack knows about it.”I buried my face in my hands in embarrassment. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me. It was bad enough that a few people knew but knowing that everyone knew was even worse.She led me towards a chair and
KADEN’S P.O.VI wanted to go to Amelia but I felt like enough time had not passed yet. She hadn’t reached out and I thought she would do so at her own pace and when she felt ready. I made sure to send her flowers every morning but I never got a response back as to whether or not she got them. As I stared at her name on my screen, I had to fight the urge to click dial.A knock on my door snapped me out of my thoughts and I looked up just as Caleb walked in. Our friendship had taken a hit since what happened and I couldn’t blame him. I had hurt someone he loved and it was unforgiveable. If he was in my shoes, I wasn’t sure I would be able to forgive him either.“The guards are back in formation and the border is clear, although there have been some suspicious rogue sightings,” he rattled off the news as if he was reading it off a piece of paper. “I have asked the guards to keep an eye out and I will let you know if anything changes.”“Thank you, Caleb.”He turned on his heels to leave a
AMELIA’S P.O.VKaden stared at me like I had grown two heads. “I have never heard that term in my life. Is it something I should know?”I let out a frustrated growl as I buried my face into my hands. Talking to him was a stupid idea, I should have known he wouldn’t know. I was told that they were extinct now I had opened a can of worms that I desperately needed to close before he started asking too many questions. I could feel his eyes on me as I thought up ways to momentarily make the last few seconds go away.“Okay,” I ended up saying finally as I shrugged. “We should go in and order.”I started opening my door when he reached over and grabbed the handle. His hand was so close to my mid section and I could feel the heat radiating off him. It had been a while since he touched me and my body recognized him, I felt him close to me and I wanted to touch him, I wanted to climb over the console and kiss him until we were both gasping for breath, I wanted him to take me home and sink into
AMELIA’S P.O.VWhen we got to the house, no one was there. It was completely empty and I never banked on being alone with Kaden. It was already hard enough to be in the same car without touching him, but being in the same house was another ball game entirely because I had memories of Kaden around this house. I had memories of him in my bed and in my space and seeing him seated comfortably on the living room couch was bringing back memories that I had tried so hard to suppress.To his credit, he didn’t seem as bothered as I was. He had one leg crossed over the other and he was still slowly nursing his coffee from the café. I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or annoyed that he didn’t seem as bothered as I was. He had promised not to do more than I could handle so maybe he was just living up to his word.We waited for thirty minutes before they finally arrived and to say they were shocked to see both of us was an understatement. I was pacing the room and Kaden was seated comfortably on the
AMELIA’S P.O.VThe ride was completely silent and at first, there was some tension because I hadn’t been in a confined space with him in a while but the tension bled out soon enough leaving me feeling more relaxed than I had in a while. The truth was that I had missed Kaden. Despite everything, my wolf still called out to his and she assured me that he was fine and he wasn’t going to hurt us but that didn’t mean I could just forget everything that happened. It still felt like yesterday to me and I couldn’t just forget it.“Amelia,” his voice was carefully soft and I turned to him. “You might want to put your wall up.”My cheeks heated with embarrassment when I realized that I was unintentionally projecting down our bond. I wondered how much he heard and what he felt about it. I made sure my wall was firmly in place but I couldn’t bring myself to think about anything else for fear that he would overhear.“I’m not upset,” he announced. “You don’t have to feel guilty for how you feel. It
CHAPTER 195AMELIA’S P.O.VFor a moment, Kaden just stood there staring at me and I wondered if I had pushed him too far. Perhaps it was never about me being ready, maybe he wasn’t ready to be with me after everything that happened.I felt so incredibly stupid and attempted to turn away from him when he grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him. I didn’t want to but we were like magnets, always drawn to each other and I couldn’t stop myself from staring straight into his eyes.“I’m only going to say this once so get this straight,” he began slowly. “I don’t ever want to see that fucking look on your face again. The only reason I said nothing is because I was thinking of how much of a bastard I would be if I fucked you right here instead of taking you up into a room.”I cracked a smile. “I don’t think I can make it upstairs.”“Me neither.”The words were barely out of his mouth before he kissed me again. I felt something akin to relief in the center of my chest. It felt good to be a
AMELIA’S P.O.VIt had been two days since Aiden came to visit and Kaden had not spoken about him. We acted as if it were a fever dream that was locked away in the far parts of our minds.I knew that Aiden wouldn’t give up anytime soon and I knew that one day, I needed to tell Kaden about what had happened but I couldn’t even figure out how to bring it up. It was unsettling and uncomfortable but I didn’t have solid proof that he meant for anything malicious to happen.“You’re thinking hard,” Kaden’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts and I turned to find him standing at the doorway to the kitchenIt was his presence that reminded me of what I was doing and I cursed as I pulled the oven open. I let out a sigh of relief when I saw that my cake hadn’t burnt but if I had left it for a few more minutes, I wouldn’t have been able to say that at all.I rushed to get it out and put it on a cooling rack all the while I could see Kaden trying to hide a smile out of the corner of his eye.I was
AMELIA’S P.O.V“Hi,” I managed out as I made my way over to them and their conversation instantly ceased. I could see that Serena was itching to touch me but they both held back for my sake. “I’m not going to shatter just because you hug me.”That was all Serena needed before she rushed to her feet and threw her arms around my shoulders. She didn’t cry like the last time but I could feel her relief as she held me. I wasn’t sure how long that lasted but as soon as she pulled away, Clara’s arms were around me.“I’m so sorry,” she whispered and I could almost taste the guilt that was radiating off her.“It wasn’t your fault,” I assured her. “We were ambushed, we were sidetracked. Thar had nothing to do with you. I need you to know that.”“You were gone, for so long.”“But I’m back now,” I pulled away and grasped her shoulders. “All that matters is that I’m back now.”She gave me a small nod. I knew it would take more than that to deal with the guilt that she felt but it was a good start
AMELIA’S P.O.VIt was exactly one week since I had been back and I was yet to leave the house.Kaden had been patient with me, not forcing me to go anywhere until I was ready or making me do anything I didn’t want to but even I knew that life had to move on. I couldn’t just sit in here forever and pretend like things were fine and the constant state of boredom was driving me mad.We were having breakfast when I spoke. “I want to go out.”Kaden stopped eating, his eyes finding mine and I could see the worry in them as he slowly ran his eyes over me. He was more protective over me than usual and I didn’t blame him, especially not after what happened. If I wanted to go anywhere, especially now, I knew that there would be crazy rules to come with it.“Where do you want to go?”I shrugged. I hadn’t really thought that far. All I knew was that I didn’t want to be within the four walls of the house anymore. I wanted to talk to my friends, I wanted to be normal, I wanted to see people without
KADEN’S P.O.VWhat Amelia needed whether she realized it or not were her friends.Just those few minutes with Serena had brightened her day more than I thought was possible. It hurt that they could do more for her than I could but I didn’t care as long as it meant that she was fine, that was all that mattered to me.After the interaction with Serena, Amelia declared that she wanted to go home. I didn’t protest, didn’t even make any other suggestions, we just got into the car and drove. She didn’t hide from me when we returned which was a plus in my books, she simply sat on the couch, laying her head on my shoulder in silence.I wasn’t sure how long we stayed there but it could have been ten hours and I wouldn’t have minded. She seemed so peaceful, more than she had since she got back and I loved that for her.“I hate the silence,” she whispered and I turned to her. “When I was there with him, it was always quiet. I couldn’t go anywhere, couldn’t do anything, it was just the two of us
AMELIA’S P.O.VI didn’t want to leave the house the next morning but when Kaden told me that it was to say goodbye to Jackson, I forced myself out.Going to the pack house was terrifying and the entire time, it felt like someone was breathing down my neck and the worst was yet to come. Kaden was a firm pillar by my side the entire time, he never once took his hand out of mine and he never strayed from my side. I knew that I was safe with him but that didn’t mean I still wasn’t a little scared.“You look like shit,” Jackson drawled as soon as he saw me.Kaden stiffened, not liking his tone but waiting to see my reaction. I was silent for a second before a small smile pulled at the corner of my lips. I wrapped my arms around his center clearly catching him off guard.For a moment, he didn’t move and then, ever so slowly, he wrapped his arms around me and squeezed softly.“I would say you look like shit but you actually look better,” I whispered as I pulled back.He had clearly taken a s
AMELIA’S P.O.VI knew I was hurting him by not letting him in but I couldn’t.How could he help when even I didn’t know how to help myself? I was home and that should have been the most important thing but I still found myself terrified. In my nightmare, I was back in Blake’s little hideaway house. I was back with him and my baby was gone.How could I tell Kaden that knowing fully well that he was going to lose his mind and panic? I didn’t want him stressed- didn’t need him stressed right now. One of us needed a clear head and it was obvious that person wasn’t going to be me.“Amelia, baby, please look at me,” Kaden’s voice was soft and coaxing as he wiped my tears off my cheeks. “Please.”I wasn’t sure if it was the please or the sound of pure defeat in his voice that had me slowly opening my eyes. He gave me a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes and I couldn’t help it, I leaned up to kiss him. It wasn’t a deep kiss of unbridled passion, it was soft, almost explorative, just
KADEN’S P.O.VI couldn’t bring myself to fall asleep.Amelia claimed to be fine but I knew her better than I knew myself. I knew every bit of her, every smile, every freckle, every curve of her skin, I knew her emotions better than I knew my own sometimes and I knew for a fact that despite her saying otherwise, she was far from fine.I could see it in the way she hardly ever met my eyes, in the hesitation in her voice and in her determination to avoid speaking about whatever she might have faced in that place. I knew the guilt that she felt, sometimes when she let her wall down by accident, I could feel it like a bitter poison at the back of my throat threatening to choke me.It didn’t matter how many times I told her that I was fine with what happened, she couldn’t forgive herself and if she couldn’t, there was no way she was going to move past it. I wasn’t a fan of the idea of her being with Blake sexually but she did what she had to in order to survive and as much as I hated it, I
AMELIA’S P.O.VI was discharged before the end of the day.Kaden clearly didn’t agree with my choice but I doubted he could bring himself to refuse me. I knew I was being a little irrational and illogical but I couldn’t bear to be anywhere else. I wanted to be surrounded by people I knew and by my home, I wanted to be surrounded by him.He carried me into the car despite knowing I could walk and for once, I didn’t protest. Clara and Caleb were nowhere to be seen by the time we were leaving, I presumed they were giving us our space and for that, I was grateful. I loved my friends but today was not that day.As we drove past the turn to the house, I turned to Kaden. “Where are we going?”“Our home.”“But it’s that way,” I pointed towards the turn that we had missed. “Kaden, where are you taking me?”“That was my house, I’m taking you to ours.”I didn’t realize what he was talking about until he pulled up in front of a familiar building. The last time I saw it, he was still trying to per