CHAPTER 47

NELLY

I walk home with my thoughts far away, feeling a knot in my stomach and vomit come up to my throat. I lean against a random wall and count how long it will take me to get into my apartment. My cell phone rings in my purse and I ignore it, going back to walking when I feel better, but suddenly the idea of ​​going home and not finding anyone turns me off, my cell phone rings again and I stop to answer it. Surprise and acting on autoTheticO, I confirm to Octávio that I'm on my way to his lecture.

Where was it again?

''Yes, of course I know where it is. ''I speak convincingly, not wanting to poke holes in my own lie. Even so, he speaks the address slowly, insisting on repeating it twice more for me to memorize. I turn off the phone, pack my bags in my purse, and hail a cab.

Twenty-three minutes later, I get out of the car and parachute into the courtyard of a college crowded with women.

The mix of voices causes an echo even outdoors and I feel diminished in front of so many eyes.

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