Se connecter*Anastasia*“Papa…” I breathe, the word so soft it barely disturbs the fog on the glass. “Is this you?”It feels too long since I saw sapphire eyes look after me like the world couldn’t tame that stubborn gentleness that believed in me. That I could do anything. Like my ideas were not foolish just because they were mine. Like my wanting to be better—better than blood, better than tradition, better than what they expect of a woman and a half—wasn’t some childish fantasy to be corrected.He always believed in me. That I could rule at all.And it has been too long since I last received anything that felt like him. Not a report. Not a request. Not another clipped summary of someone else’s suffering. Something warm. Something like home.I want to hear from him. I want to hear from Johan, too. I want a letter that isn’t returned unopened, isn’t swallowed by distance, and isn't lost to silence like so many prayers flung into the wind.My mind betrays me with images I shouldn’t tempt myself
*Anastasia*I barely notice my skirt whispering against the stone as I push forward. A bit too fast to be dignified, but too intent on putting distance between myself and that room. The domed chamber falls away behind my shoulders in a blur of gold and turquoise, torches and marble and watching mouths. The doors shut somewhere behind me, heavy, final.But the warmth doesn’t follow. The fire pits can crackle and pop all they like in there, so bright and careless, pretending at comfort. But out here the corridor is immediately colder, and it feels personal. As if the chill seeps through the seams of my very slippers like an unwavering judgement at everything I do. Relentlessly quiet, efficient, and straight to bone.I keep moving anyway. Press faster. Not that it changes the feeling.Because I can still feel it. The lingering gaze of both trailing after me till the very last turn. Pale brown and vermillion both. Admiral Nugen’s steady weight. The opposite to Mykhol’s…something else. So
Nugen didn’t slow.Winter slammed into him. The dry, biting air went straight for the soft places. It clawed at his cheeks and the bridge of his nose, stole the warmth from his breath the instant it left his mouth. His lungs seized around the cold, and for a heartbeat the air tasted almost familar—thin, metallic, almost electrical, the sharp scent that came before weather changed. Like the sky was deciding whether it wanted to break.But he didn’t have time to ponder if that meant more rain or something. It didn’t matter right now if it did or not.Outside, the walkway stretched bleached and brittle under the dim winter light. The fountain stood in its familiar place, near the center of the walkway. Gurgling mass should have been loud, alive—but it was caught in silence now. Iced over from the unusually frigid temperatures for Nochten. The water froze mid-spill, ice glazed over carved stone like glass set wrong. It made the familiar landmark unnatural. Again, warning that this winter
*Admiral Nugen* Nugen watched Anastasia go. Watched as the vast white hall swallowed her fleeting figure quickly. Only the flash of her red shawl remained against his vision. The streak of crimson trailed behind her, lifted once behind her as a flag caught by a one final, dry breath of winter air before it fell and vanished through the archway.He watched on until even the memory of red finally faded like a dying ember in the bitter winter morn.Only then could he allow himself to stop.Not because he wasn’t afraid for her out there. He still was, more than ever now. But that was just another worry he would have to deal with.But for right now, Ana was beyond the threshold, likely to return to where her study, or rooms, or wherever else that was better than here. Because anywhere, anything, was going to be better. If it meant she was beyond his reach. Good.A bare sigh slipped from him, thin as smoke.She’s safe, he told himself. Safe.For now…But already, the words tasted like sa
*Ana*For a heartbeat my words just hang there, fragile as spun glass. And in that awed silence, I dare do something I’ve learned from sitting in this throne for nine years, that I ought not do. Hope.Hope they will take to this idea. Like the few rare meetings when proposals bloomed into applause, the rarer still when a new idea earns wary respect. A handful of small miracles, really, in shadow of Nochten’s staunch stance to stay traditional, but even then. Once in a while, even they had their moments.Moments to be more open minded. More accepting. More reasonable. Listen to me and–This will not be one of them.As soon as I say it, I feel the instant bite back, sharp as a spark in dry straw.“She means to bleed us!”Lady Katya’s voice, sickeningly feminine like silk over steel—cuts through the murmuring first like a knife sliding free. Her eyes, a bright cruel red, fix on me with practiced outrage, as though I have personally inconvenienced her by existing. Not that that was ever
*Song recommendation for this chapter: Light of the Seven by Ramin Djawadi**Ana*My gaze betrays me once again.Despite my better efforts, it slides back, quiet as a lie, to the bare stretch of court floor. Where a certain absence has started to take shape, like a physical thing all on its own. Or a mock of what used to be there. More exactly. I quietly correct.To the empty seats where the Celbests used to stand. Pillars of consistency for so many years before—Sir Celbest planted there like a ledger made flesh—silver cane tapping once, twice, in that impatient rhythm of his, as if like any blue-blooded noble that demanded presence and answers. And all the while, Pendwick beside him, stiff-backed and earnest, always overdressed as if fabric could make him just that little bit braver. False fangs in, hair neat, hands never quite knowing what to do with themselves. He would try—so carefully—not to look at me too openly. But like he was clearly holding onto my every word. Not just bec
*Anastasia*The velvet beneath my palms is damp with more than rain—it trembles with the quiet shake I've only now begun to notice threading through my bones.I press down harder, willing the feeling to smooth out beneath the pressure, willing the tremor to settle before my fingers must meet the br
*Bruno*The almost-kiss still hung in the air like smoke—thick, suffocating, impossible to wave away.Bruno didn't move. He didn't have to.Pendwick's face said everything. Not just the crimson flush creeping up his neck like spilled wine, or the dazed, too-wide eyes that reminded Bruno of a startl
*Ana* The rain has finally stopped. Not that I'd noticed right away—what with my ears still ringing from the hours in court, my head too thick with thoughts to recognize the earned silence. But here, in the stables, where it smells like damp hay and warm leather, everything feels hushed. The hors
*Pendwick* There were worse places to be standing by the time court dismissed—a lightning strike, say, that burnt him to a crisp. Or perhaps under a falling chandelier, the crystal shards slicing him into ribbons. But next to his grandfather while the last of the nobles trickled out after Lord Myk







