05 Time And Wounds

~Winter~

 It's been a month since the Bluemoon incident, and I still haven't been able to get over what happened. It's Brandon’s damn scent and that residual bond causing an emptiness in my soul. I can't move past it, and the helplessness of it is infuriating.

 Summer believes I will be okay; I think so, too, but the stares and gossip aren't helping matters at all.

Now, a month has passed, and I can't say I have healed completely; in fact, I still cry about it. 

Every time I go out, someone is pointing and gossiping. People look at me with pity. 

Brandon has tried to reach out several times, but I shut him out. It is best this way. The earlier he accepts he ended things and it is over, the better. 

I have yet to hear from Lesley, but I know I will. At the rate Brandon is going with his pleas, she will come for me.

Even Brandon's mother has reached out a couple of times to check on me. 

Who was I kidding?

It wasn't every day a fated got dumped at the altar. I couldn't believe Brandon could do this to me. I still find it hard to believe. 

I tried to convince myself that it was all Lesley and Brandon had no choice, but I knew he had a choice. He was a douchebag that deserved to suffer, but I knew he wouldn't suffer. People like him don’t suffer. Elites: they have all the good cards.

Maybe Summer and I shouldn't have moved to Hayland, but we had to. We had no choice.

We had come with some of the children in the orphanage.

Hayland was a cheaper place, and we believed we could function better and provide for the children in Hayland. 

We were right, and it would have been so if I hadn't gotten involved with Brandon. 

Upon our arrival in Hayland, we had the obligation to meet the Alpha and establish a connection with him to establish our place in the community. That's when Brandon and I crossed paths. Had we not gone to see him, things would have been different, and I wouldn't be so empty right now.

When financial struggles arose due to my inability to contribute my share of baked goods for sale because I was focused on my training as Luna, Brandon stepped in. He generously provided us with the building we now call home and guaranteed a steady food supply. 

Despite the current month's provisions, I harboured doubts about the sustainability of his support now that Lesley was in charge and she hated me. We were indeed fucked. 

Summer and I have been trying to figure out how to run the orphanage without Brandon since I returned from his home after confronting him about the rejection. 

A tiny part of me hoped he wouldn't stop being kind to the children, but it wasn't his call to make. It was Lesley’s, and she did not care for anyone but herself.

 I poured myself a glass of gin and sat by the window in the room I shared with Summer, looking at the moon.

"Why did you tie me to that bastard?" I asked the moon. Was it possible that I was fated to suffer?

As orphans on the streets, Summer and I never attended a conventional school. Despite that, we were determined to educate ourselves, learn to read and write and acquire various other skills.

The orphanage we lived in was shit, and once we were ten, we were sent out to fend for ourselves. We were past the age of adoption, and no one would adopt a Gamma and Delta. There was a rumour that we might have noble blood because of our breed, but that was all it was: a rumour and nothing more. Our last names were shit and rootless.

The words Brandon spoke about me at our almost-wedding echoed in my mind. He said the truth – I had to navigate life independently, and perfection was beyond my grasp. How could I be a lady when I wasn’t even allowed to exist?

As I gazed at the moon, I questioned its intentions for me.

"Winter", I heard Summer’s voice say, and I turned to look in her direction. She was wearing her nightdress and looked exhausted. We are more like twins even though we do not share parents. We grew up on the streets together, so we understood each other. 

Our dream has always been to make our world a better place in the best way we can. To ensure orphans have a home and a good life. To ensure they do not feel the absence and lack of having a parent. 

We started all this to ensure they had a better life than we did on the streets. So they are protected and loved. 

So far, we have been trying, but with Brandon out of the picture now, we will need funding, and the bakery business will not supply it. I know this for a fact.

The economy in Hayland isn't good, and the people's purchasing power is low. We might be able to feed the children, but paying the rent would be difficult.

"Still up?" Summer asked me, joining me by the window. 

She collects the glass from my hand and drinks the rest of the gin. She did not flinch while swallowing the poison, and I smiled at her.

"I tucked them all in. They keep asking all sorts of questions. Children," she said, rolling her eyes, and I smiled. Then she reached out and gently pushed a loose strand of my hair behind my ear.

"How are you holding up, Sparkle?" She asks, using her term of endearment.

She gave me that name because she said I always had a spark in my eyes, no matter the circumstance. I doubt I do now.

I called her Sunshine because that was what Summer was: all sunshine and no rain. I hoped what happened to me never happened to her. She kept our sky clear, and it should remain that way.

Summer had concern evident in her eyes, and I nodded.

"It's getting better," I say, and she nods.

"You know we have to leave Hayland," She says, and I know she is right, so I smile.

"Brandon was the one funding the project. Now, with Lesley running things around here, I doubt the funding will continue," She said, making a lot of sense, and I agreed.

Then I sighed and looked at her.

There was no point hiding my true feelings from her. This question plagued my mind two days after the bluemoon incident.

I would lie if I said I wasn't panicking about the situation.

"I don't know what to do, Summer. We can't go back to Brighton, and you know why," I confess, and she nods with tears.

"I was thinking we move to Greenville. We might be able to settle down there. The indigenes are nice people, and the Alpha..." she starts, and I shake my head.

"We do not have the means to get there, Summer. Transporting all of us, including the children, will cost a lot," I say, and she agrees,

"Then we should look for money because we can't continue to live in this forsaken place. I hope Brandon and his bitch burn in hell," She says, and I laugh, then leave the window to pour myself another drink. 

I gulped a shot and poured another into the glass before returning to the window.

"Any ideas?" I ask, and she thinks about it. 

“Honestly, I just know we are to leave Hayland. It is the only logical thing to do. But I do not know how,” she confesses.

I placed the glass at the window, ran my fingers through my blonde hair, and bowed my head from frustration.

"I just had to get involved with the fucking Alpha," I slurred.

"Our stay would have been blissful if Brandon and I weren't fated. If we weren’t fucking..." I confessed, and Summer remained silent without saying a word. She believed it, too. I did, so it was okay.

"We need to get money, and we need it fast. I don't think we can last any longer in this place. I can't stand the Luna. She is a bitch. She won but still won't rest. I think you gave her a complex, Sparkle," Summer said, and we both laughed, but soon my laughter faded, and tears escaped my eyes.

"It gets better, Sparkle. Just wait and see. Time heals all wounds," She said, and I sighed.

"Does it heal scars, too? Would time heal my scars?" I asked her, and she was silent. We both knew the answer. Scars don't heal. They just fade a little, but you will always remember.