Brooke.“No, stop, please,” I curl into a ball on the forest floor with my eyes scrunched shut tightly, my palms slapped over my ears as I try to stop my mind from flitting through all these anxiety-inducing images. I feel like I’m paralyzed, I can’t move my body, but how could I when I don’t even have command over my mind? My head hurts from what’s happening within, and I don’t know what’s transpiring. Since I saw the cliff, the dark chasm of my mind had erupted, and things that I have never seen before were making a reappearance, running through my mind’s eye like galloping horses, too fast to decipher, too brief to have any context.I hear a keening cry rip off my throat, and suddenly, I am plunging into a scene.I sit in front of a fireplace, staring at the mantle. On the top of it is a picture, a painting made quite crudely. I am no older than ten, but even I can say how the shadows and lights of the picture are off, considering how accurate they were on all the paintings that hun
Brooke. “So, that cliff,” Alexander points at the nightmare-inducing clifftop which I saw through the tree with an incredulous expression on his face, “Made you have a panic attack.”“It makes no sense,” I agree with his tone, “I honestly don’t know what the hell happened. One moment I was fine,” I bite the insides of my cheeks, “Well, not exactly fine, I was very distressed because of being lost and all, and annoyed because of all the mosquitoes, but the moment I saw the cliff my brain just went crazy. I can’t even explain it.”“I see,” Alexander mutters, staring at the cliff with a frown, “We should definitely talk to Dale about this when we get back home. This is the second time you had a panic attack.”“Is it bad?” I ask, feeling my heart drop.“I don’t know, it might be,” He shrugs, and then sighs, “I’m glad I found you though. I was so worried that something happened to you.”“I’m sorry I made you worried,” Feeling guilty, I mutter, “I never meant for any of this to happen.”“No
Brooke.Alexander is kissing me!Alexander is KISSING me!Oh, Goddess, I don’t know how to proceed. I’m frozen on the spot, but my heart is soaring and singing. My blood is rushing up and down my body, and I swear I’m holding my breath in. A few moments ago, my mind was flashing with thoughts, but now it’s at a standstill. There’s only one thought echoing in my head.Alexander .is. kissing. me.And just as suddenly as he pressed his lips to mine, he pulls away. The expression on his face can only be described as shock and horror, and he scrambles back away from me.“Oh, my Goddess,” He whispers, “What have I done?”“You kissed me,” I reply like an idiot, gaping at him.“Oh, no,” He buries his face in his hands, shaking his head, “Oh, no, no, no, this cannot be happening.”“I don’t think I’ve ever kissed anyone,” I find myself saying, “Not even in the past.”“I’m so sorry,” Alexander apologizes, “I wasn’t thinking, you were just there and something was telling me to just do it-““I like
Brooke. We rush through the forest to get to the pack, and when we arrive, there is a commotion ongoing.At first, we think it is because of us. That they are cross that we were not present, and that the Alpha is looking for Alexander. There was a gathering at the village square, and sounds of distress and unrest were coming from the crowd gathered around the stage. Cursing ourselves for losing track of time while we were kissing in the forest, we make our way towards them, trying to come up with excuses, and wondering how to tell Alpha Maddox about what happened.But as we near the gathering, we see something unexpected.Jenna and Caster are on the stage, and Jenna is being held by two of the pack guards. She’s crying, her expression terrified. Caster is pointing at her, looking angry. He’s talking to the crowd.“What the hell?” I mutter, and Alexander’s eyes narrow.“This is bad,” He mutters, and we hurry to the gathering.Caster’s words start to reach my ears, “…are we supposed to
Brooke. “Alexander would never do that to me,” I immediately retort, knowing full well that he was trying to use his bitterness about Alexander to try and get him entangled in this, “Because he doesn’t have a reason to. What would he gain from having me lost and wandering in the forest? Alpha Maddox, please tell him what you asked Alexander to do for me.”Maddox finally breaks his silence and says in a matter-of-fact voice, “I was going to let you handle this, Caster because as my heir you should have experience with such things, but I have to agree with Brooke on this one. I explicitly asked Alexander to take care of Brooke throughout her stay at the Lunar Legacy pack, to keep an eye on her, and to teach her our ways. I don’t have any reason to believe Alexander would willingly risk Brooke’s safety like that in the forest.”“Then, father, riddle me this,” Caster snaps back, “Why did the both of them come out of the forest together, is he wasn't in there with her?”“I never said I was
Brooke.Mother.The woman in purple who was in the picture was supposed to be my mother.And who told me that? My father.The more I think about this specific image freshly etched into my brain now, the more familiar it becomes. It’s a memory, I’m sure of it.The cliff triggered me somehow to see a memory of my mother.My heart races in my chest, and I can’t help the tears of elation that falls down my cheeks. By now I’ve realized that my eyes had the tendency to leak with every intense emotion that I have, and while it was humiliating when it threatened to happen in the public, now that I was in private, I could let the tears fall freely as I run the memory in my head over and over again.The memory insinuates that the younger version of me who is looking at the portrait did not know who the woman is before her father told her that she was the woman who gave birth to her. I also thought about another woman whom this father of mine had married, giving way to the theory that my mother w
Brooke. “Alright, clearly we need to talk about this,” Alexander sighs, “May I come in?”“Yes, sure,” I step away from the door, wanting to bury myself on the ground with embarrassment. What on earth is wrong with me? Why wasn't there a filter between my mind and my mouth?Alexander closes the door behind him before walking towards the window. He looks nervous, and he’s avoiding eye contact.Those are not good signs. I fear the worse, and gulp down the nerves that suddenly start to clog my throat.“I’m sorry for blurting it out like that,” I say before he could get a word in, “I wasn’t in the right frame of mind.”“Brooke, I understand,” Alexander replies with a tender tone, “The first time I had feelings for a girl, I felt the same way too.”That surprises me, which makes no sense because obviously, a man like Alexander would’ve had crushes when he was younger. I don’t know if I had any crushes before when I was younger, but if I were like all the other girls, I would’ve had.But the
Brooke. “I think the panic attacks are a result of whatever trauma you experienced before you lost your memory,” Physician Dale Baker states after a long, drawn silence.Alexander had led me to the Lunar Legacy Clinic before he went to the Forge, and I only had to wait a few moments before Dale Baker came in. Upon seeing me he’d greeted me with a smile, and inquired as to why I was there. When I told him it was a medical concern, he’d call me into a room next to the infirmary where he normally met with patients.As soon as we sat down, I began to tell him all about the panic attacks, and he asked me some questions. When I normally got them, what triggered them, who I was with when they happened etc. After I gave all his questions thorough answers, he went quiet and started to think.I also told him about the memory I saw of my past, of the picture of the purple-clad woman.My attention snaps back to the physician at his words. I’ve been observing the meeting room as he was thinking, s
Lydia. We run through the forest as fast as we can, without looking back. I can feel my heart breaking inside my chest with every step we take. I left Ryan. I left Ryan to fend himself against his murderous tyrant of a brother all alone. I left him on his own. I left the love of my life. The pain is too much to bear, and I feel myself slip off. In the spirit plane, my wolf is startled to see me. The purple and magenta sky of my mind's world is strewn with multicolored stars, but I can't appreciate that beauty today. Disregarding my yipping wolf, I stride towards the remaining chain. I need to break this in order to gain my full potential. I don't care if I'm still too weak. Ryan is in danger, and I need to break this chain in order to save him. I need to go and face down an entire packet to reclaim my beloved back. My wolf comes growling and snaps her jaws at me. She tries to warn me off the chain, as she knows I'm not strong enough yet. But I am too far gone to listen to reaso
Lydia.Otis hollers as I stab his arm with the arrowhead, his cry waking up everyone in the near vicinity. I start to hear voices coming from all around me. But caught in the throes of my anger, I don't care for them. I want to see Otis hurt for what he was trying to do to Ryan. With a yell, I pull off the sharp metal from his chest, and he cries out once again. Clutching the injured arm, he stumbles back a couple of steps and hits the wall, hard, with his head. The impact makes him lose consciousness, and he falls to the ground.I brace myself to pounce on him again and end him once and for all. I could feel the bloodlust taking over me, poisoning my mind like a scarlet berry. My vision tinges with death, and there's the gushing sound of an ocean in my ears. 'Kill, kill, kill,' my mind chants, and there's nothing I want more than to listen to it. I want to see fear clog his face, I want to see him choke on his own spit. I want to watch the life bleed out of him. I want to watch him
Lydia.The shadow moved discretely as if it was aware that it was being watched. Or perhaps it was not taking any risks and was acting as if it was already in danger.As I move through the darkness the trees provide, being extra careful not to make a sound, I start to see the owner of the shadow.It was a man, judging from the body. He was dressed in all black, covering his body from head to toe in dark garments that blended in with the night. His face is wrapped in a black scarf. He looks almost like an assassin, but I know that his gait is too sloppy to be that of an assassin's. Besides, an assassin would never creep around the caves so slowly. The man stops near a certain cave. There is a window carved into the stone, and it's open partially due to the humidity. The man straightens and peers inside the window, opening it slowly enough not to make a creaking noise as it was bound to do if opened quickly. Then, ever so carefully, he places his palms upon the windowsill and raises h
Lydia.That day, I bring down my first deer. It feels almost surreal, but the arrow that pierces through its unsuspecting eyes is mine. The deer falls to the ground as soon as the arrow hits, and although I feel remorse for it as always, I also cannot keep myself from crowing out of triumph."Good job!" Caleigh claps me on the back before running towards the carcass to start gutting it. We pack the meat inside our packs and dump the entrails far away so other carnivores could make use of it. With meat-heavy backpacks, we make our way back to our caves so we could drop the bounty off in the kitchens. The stores of meat in the pack would be full after this."How strange," Caleigh mused as we dropped the meat off, gazing around the pack lands, "Your unwelcome shadow is absent today."I'd noticed that too. I have yet to see Otis for the day; he'd been absent from my site since this morning. Maybe he finally came to his senses and decided not to pursue me. But I knew that thought is too g
Lydia.The next day, as soon as I woke up, my eyes fell on the bow.It was a thing of beauty, and I could see that Caleigh spent much time perfecting it. The wood appeared to be from a mature rowan tree, and I wondered where she even found one. They grew high up in the mountains. Made from rowan heartwood, it was polished and stained with the juice of peppermint leaves. I know this because I could smell the refreshing minty smell from the wood. The middle of the arch was wrapped with cured leather that was firm to the touch. The bowstring was taut and strong, made from fine hairs twined together to make a thick string.I gripped the bow from the middle and raised it in an arc, bringing it in front of me. With my other hand, I pulled the bowstring. It was surprisingly easy after the newfound powers I gained after breaking the chain last night. As I perfected my posture, I felt it flow through my blood. It made me feel as if I were already invincible as if I could take down my enemies w
I sent her a warm smile. I could only imagine how bad she wanted to be set free. She yawned and looked at me. She seemed much calmer than before and I hope this was not only because of the exhaustion. I held out my hand. She pushed her nose against my palm and I petted her.“What do you think?” I asked “Are you ready?”She nodded. I was getting worried. She was still not willing to talk. I doubt that she was unable to. And she didn’t hate me anymore. For me it was something I just couldn’t understand. In addition, it made me feel bad. If she didn’t hate me, why wouldn’t she talk to me? There were many things we could have discussed. I breathed a sigh but tried to understand her.I stepped to her leg and looked at the chain. She turned her head to me then nodded, implying it was really time to release more of her power. I grabbed the chain. I struggled with that one. I hoped I was just exhausted. The animal looked at me. Her eyes narrowed. She cooperated with me: she took some steps so
I grumbled as Caleigh shook me in the following morning. My mind was still reckless and couldn’t sleep much. Besides the already existing problems I couldn’t stop thinking about Ryan’s body.“I told you.” the huntress told me “Come on or I’m going to leave you behind!”“Okay, okay.” I moaned but got out of my bed.I followed Caleigh to the forest and I did my best not to fall back into sleep. I started to doubt that I could have broken another chain. We remained silent. The huntress was sure there were some deer nearby. It was undoubtedly her favorite type of meat. I saw as her muscles became tense and in the same moment I smelled the animal’s scent. It was near. She motioned that we would switch places. I was reluctant but she wanted me to hunt the deer down.I kept listening to the noises and waited for it to appear. Once it was within eyesight I breathed a silent sigh and picked an arrow. I kept my eye on the target but I became nervous all of a sudden. Even though I aimed at the h
When I reached the training grounds I saw he was pulling some weights shirtless. I smiled to myself but stepped in and reached him. It was time to play again. A part of me enjoyed this part either with Ryan or Caleigh. But another part of me was annoyed because I just wanted to be myself. I wanted to be with this man. I wanted to be free and careless. Instead of all this, we had to be careful and play roles, acting like we were nothing more than friends or training partners. Once I reached him I put my hand on his shoulder gently.“Do you need a partner?” I asked.“Maybe.” he grinned “How about a night run?”“Oh, I’m in.” I chuckled then leaned closer to him “I thought you can’t get any stronger now.”“I can’t.” he sighed “We’re acting. That’s all. And you can become stronger.”“You’re right.” I nodded “Let’s go then.”I kept my pace with Ryan’s. Outrunning him would have been no problem. We still had to pretend everything was normal between us. I hated that part. I was proud we foun
The huntress looked at me and sent me a warm smile.“So how far did you get?” she asked.“Not far.” I blushed “I’m afraid someone will notice.” I sighed.“Believe me, Ryan is careful with this. He wouldn’t risk losing you.”“I know, I just don’t want to take any unnecessary risks, you know? If we leave the pack before I unleash my full power, the journey is going to be even more dangerous.”“I know you’re right. But he loves you.”“I know.” I smiled “I wouldn’t sneak out for nothing. But even though it feels so good and so right, I can’t shake off the feeling of something bad is about to happen.”“I understand what you’re talking about.” she said grimly “It’s like it’s way to quiet right before a huge thunderstorm. And I don’t like it either.”“I wish we could have met under different circumstances.”“I wouldn’t leave this place without you.”She remained silent for some minutes and I was waiting for her further response. I knew she was grateful I turned up out of the blue several day