Chapter Five

As her former classmates began leaving the cocktail party, they each made a stop at the entrance to tell Katie what a great time they had, and how much they were looking forward to the banquet on Saturday. Katie thanked them for attending, then quickly gathered the registration papers and called James to let him know she was going to be home late. When the call went to voice mail again, Katie started to feel an unfamiliar worry knot begin to grow in her stomach. There were many times the legislature would work late, but James always found a way to let her know what time he'd be coming home. If she didn't know any better, she might have suspected he was with another woman.

Katie met Melanie at the elevator and they entered together, but just before the doors closed completely, a man's hand triggered them to reopen. The hand was connected to the body of Wyatt, and his other hand was connected to the waist of the cocktail waitress who had been serving at the party.

"Hi girls. This is, uh . . . " he turned to look at the waitress' name tag, "Cheryl. Say hi to my good friends K.C. and Mel, Cheryl."

"Hi." The waitress was a little shy and appeared to be nearly half their age.

I guess he couldn't wait for later, Melanie thought.

"Robbing the cradle are we, Wyatt?" Melanie whispered her sarcastic question a bit too loudly. Fortunately the elevator stopped at the second floor and the women walked through the open doors before Wyatt had time to reply.

"Can you believe that guy? He's our age and he's still acting like he never left high school," Melanie's disgust was obvious by the tone of her voice.

"You should have heard him tonight, bragging about his stationery store to anyone who would listen. I swear if they took the letter I out of the alphabet, he wouldn't have anything to say!"

"Well, not that I'm trying to make excuses, but I heard he never got over Brenda, breaking their engagement years ago. He's still single and he always comes to events with a different woman on his arm. I think the guy is just lonely."

"Katie, you always did believe the best of people, but in this case, I think you're totally wrong. Wyatt is alone because any woman in her right mind wouldn't be able to put up with his bullshit any longer than one night."

Before Katie could reply, Melanie stopped in front of a door.

"Here it is. Room 212."

Melanie knocked on the door and Stuart let them into the suite. Don was sitting on the couch, surrounded by several unopened file boxes. There were maps laid out on the coffee table and a large white board was behind him.

"Welcome, ladies," he said. "Please make yourselves comfortable. I know it's late, but can I offer either of you a drink? Jack Daniels, as I recall Ms. Tyler."

Don rose from the couch and walked over to the wet bar.

"Now I'm Ms. Tyler? I'll take that drink, thank you Mr.?"

"Wagner. Donald Wagner."

Don answered in a much more formal voice than he used the last time he poured her the drink. "Anything for you, Mrs. O'Brien?"

"No thank you," Katie replied, "Stu, can you please tell us why we're here? I really need to get going."

Katie was becoming irritated. She still had a great deal of preparations to finish before the banquet the following evening and she needed to get a good night's sleep. Melanie took her drink and sat beside Katie on the couch.

"Ok, Mr. Wagner," She said, emphasizing the more formal name. "Will you please explain exactly why you asked us here?"

Instead of replying, Don reached inside his jacket pocket, pulled out a triangular yellow badge with a white numeral 11 printed in the center, and handed it to Melanie. Stu showed Katie an identical badge, only his had a numeral 2 in the center.      

"Do you recognize these?" Don said.

"No, not really," Melanie said. "Should I?"

"Mel," Katie said, "You should know what these are. My sons used to play the same game we played when we were their age. These are U.N.C.L.E. badges."

"From the old television show? You've got to be kidding. Stu, aren't you a bit old to be playing spies?" Melanie giggled and took a sip of her drink.

"I also have this." Stu handed Katie and Melanie his business card. The women started laughing when they saw what was printed on it. The watermark was a blue background with a yellow continent design. In the center there was a round globe with lines crossing through it. It sat on a solid black line, beneath which were the letters; U.N.C.L.E. United Network Command for Law and Enforcement printed on the top line, and beneath was the text: This is to certify that Stuart Janns has qualified for service with U.N.C.L.E. and may be called to active duty with his/her section on 12 hours notice (Y3K7 - Hazardous Duty).

"Guys, these props must have cost you a bundle. Did you get this stuff on E-bay?" Melanie laughed.

"I'm not in the mood for jokes, Stuart. You know I'm worried about James and you made me stay late for this?" Katie was becoming furious. "I'm going home."

Katie stood to leave and Melanie was about to follow when Don's stern tone stopped them cold.

"Sit down, ladies. I assure you. This is no joke."

"Don. You don't have to frighten them. They have every right to think we're making this up," Stu turned his attention to the women. "Katie. Mel. The truth is, Don and I really are actual agents with the United Network Command for Law and Enforcement, just like the card says. I have been since my first year of college."

"C'mon Stuart. You're a movie critic, for God's sake, you're not a spy. You're gay!" Mel was beginning to feel the effects of the bourbon.

"We're not the military, Mel," Stuart's tone was completely devoid of any humor. "There is no ‘don't ask, don't tell’ policy in U.N.C.L.E., and the agency doesn't discriminate."

"Which is why, if you noticed, there is no silhouette of a man on the insignia."

Don picked up his card and returned it to his jacket pocket.

"You're right, Ms. Tyler, Stuart is a movie critic, which gives him an excellent cover identity so he can travel incognito to all parts of the world on assignment while he's also writing reviews."

"Don. The Man From U.N.C.L.E. was a fictional television show in the sixties. Katie and I just played spies, like I told you, with the guys from our class, but none of it was real. I think you guys are totally nuts." 

"You're right about the television show, Ms Tyler..."

"And would you please stop with the Ms. Tyler crap," Melanie interrupted. "I'm sitting in your hotel room, after midnight on a Friday night, getting a bit drunk. I think you can call me Mel, Don."

Melanie not-too-subtly crossed her legs at the thigh. The move didn't go unnoticed by Don.  He smiled warmly and continued.

"As I started to say, Mel, you're right about the television show. All those exotic locations were built on a Paramount Studio sound stage and the agents were actors, however, the scripts were all written using specific codes that were transmitted to real agents all over the world."

"You're kidding, right?" Katie was having a difficult time believing what she was hearing, but she was no longer in any hurry to leave.

"That was one of the reasons each episode was called the "such and such" Affair. The title was the cypher to the message which was planted in the script of that show, usually integrated into the Solo character's dialogue. The cypher changed each week as well."

"With the help of the producers and writers, we were able to infiltrate the entire T.H.R.U.S.H. organization," Stu added, "Once it was disbanded, we no longer had any need for the television show, so it was cancelled."

"Ok, so let's assume we believe you, which I'm not quite sure I do, that doesn't explain why you're telling us all of this, or why I'm sitting in your hotel room instead of asleep in my own." Melanie was going to add, with you, but didn't want to upset her ultra-conservative girlfriend.

"Or why I'm here instead of at home with my husband!"

Katie was beginning to lose her usual calm demeanor.

"The details are in these files and we'll have more time tomorrow to go over them with you..."

"Tomorrow?" Katie interrupted, "I can't do anything tomorrow, I'm in charge of the entire reunion!"

"We'll meet early in the morning. It won't take more than a few hours to go over everything. I promise you'll have plenty of time to make your reunion," Don said. "Believe me, Katie. After I tell you what is going on, I think you'll agree the situation is a bit more serious than your little party."

"Don," Stu said, "there's no need to be insulting. Just answer their questions."

"I'm sorry, ladies, but we've been trying to infiltrate this guy's operation for so long and now that we're this close, I'm feeling a bit anxious."

"Ok, Don. You talk.  We'll listen."

Melanie pretended she was interested in what the men had to say, but all she really wanted to do was appease them so they would finish playing their practical joke and she could leave. It was going to take more than a few trinkets to convince her that any of what Don and Stuart told her was fact.

"First, I need to give you a bit of background information. Abbeyville was just one of many towns where we had satellite operations located in the mid-sixties." Don said. "The agency has been accumulating information for the past thirty years on one of your former classmates and what we believe is an attempt to reorganize T.H.R.U.S.H., with their headquarters located right here in Abbeyville."

"We have reliable Intel that something big is going down, but we haven't been able to get any of our people close enough to the head of the operation to get any specific details. We've already lost six agents because the guy became too suspicious, but we figure he'd trust a couple of women from his high school class."

"This thirtieth reunion, by coincidence, corresponded with the date we knew his operation was going on-line," Don added.

"Who is this classmate you're talking about?" Something told Melanie she already knew the answer before Don even said the name.

"Wyatt Gaynes."

"And we also believe that Eric and Charles are helping him." Stuart said.

"Now I know you two are totally bonkers!" Katie jumped up from the couch. "Wyatt isn't the head of any international criminal organization. He owns a stationery store and print shop in town. I don't want to have anything to do with this. I'm going home. Right Now!"

"Of course you're free to leave whenever you want," Don’s words were soft, but firm and deliberate. "But before you do, you might want to know why you haven't been able to get in touch with your husband."

Katie's patience was wearing thin. Her usual Minnesotan calm was beginning to turn into a major storm.

"Don, if you know something about James, you'd better start talking and I mean right now!"

Just as he was about to reply, Katie's cell phone rang. "Don't bother, that's his ring tone."

Katie flipped open the phone. Melanie could tell by the expression on her friend's face that Katie was receiving disturbing news. Don and Stuart made themselves busy going over several of the files on the table while they waited for Katie to finish. Fifteen minutes later, Melanie noticed her friend's demeanor was much calmer after she hung up the phone.

"What happened?" Melanie asked.

"That was Frank Campbell, James' chief assistant. Apparently James passed out during the senate vote and was taken to the hospital. They thought he'd suffered a heart attack."

"Heart attack?!" Melanie exclaimed, "Katie, he's only 48!"

"It's okay, Mel. Frank said he's going to be fine. His EKG was normal and they tested him for angina, but his arteries are clear. Frank said he might have something called generalized anxiety disorder, whatever that is. They're releasing him in a few hours, and he'll call me when he gets home."

Stuart said. "GAD is caused by excessive fear and worry and has similar symptoms to a heart attack, like pounding heart, sweating and shortness of breath, but it's not serious."

"That's what Frank said too. I can't imagine what could have caused the attack. I didn't think James was particularly worried about work and he's never been afraid of anything in his life." Katie said, "Although he has been behaving a bit strangely for a few weeks, now that I think about it. Mel knows that James and I have been together for very long time and in all those years, I've never seen him so much as raise his voice let alone lose his temper, but he had been uncharacteristically irritable."

"Go home, Katie," Don tried to show some compassion he wasn't actually feeling. The mission was too important to be compromised by a non-serious medical condition. Stuart scribbled an address on the back of his ID cards and handed one to Katie, and one to Melanie.

     "Meet us here at seven o'clock tomorrow morning," he said.

"I can understand why you'd want Katie to help you," Melanie said. "She and Wyatt still live in Abbeyville and she certainly has closer contact with him then I do, so why am I here?

"Melanie, once our agents get everything in place, we're going to need your voice-over skills to set up a fraudulent telecommunications network. Don't worry, you'll both be working with us at U.N.C.L.E. headquarters far away from any danger."

"And Wyatt doesn't suspect anything?" Katie asked.

"We've got that situation well under control as well," Don replied. "One of our female agents is with him now. Cheryl's mission is to keep Wyatt busy until after the reunion banquet tomorrow night. So, Melanie, Katie, are you two ladies willing to help us nail this guy?"

The room went quiet for several minutes as the women contemplated the agent's offer. Katie thought about how she had always been the strong supporter of her husband and sons as they took center stage. As much as she enjoyed being a behind-the-scenes heroine, this was her chance to do something important on her own. The agents had come to her because of her technical ability and intelligence and not because of her talent as a fund raiser for her boy's sports team, or her husband's campaign.

At her age, she knew this was going to be her first and last chance to accomplish something more important, and a hell of a lot more exciting that baking a Minnesota State Fair red-ribbon winning pie.

"I'd still like to hear more of the details and I'll have to check with James first, of course," Katie said, "but if Melanie agrees, I'm in."

For Melanie, the offer produced quite a different response. The agents only wanted her to do what she was already getting paid to do in her day job. She played many similar roles for the animated characters she gave voices to, so another one or two more wasn't that much of a stretch. What Don and Stuart were asking her to do wasn't anything out of the ordinary, even for a so-called spy mission. Plus spending more time with the handsome U.N.C.L.E. agent was definitely a very persuasive perk.

"I guess I am too. I'd better get some sleep if we're going to meet up at seven."

"Then it's all set. We'll see you tomorrow morning." Don was a bit more excited about seeing Melanie then he wanted to admit, or reveal.

"Get some rest. It's going to be a very long weekend."

"You can say that again!" Katie said.