Ch 12: Honesty Is Key

Amilia pov:

After a few more rounds and a long shower we were relaxing on the couch eating Chinese takeout. Azrael offered to let me stay as long as I liked, which I didn't mind.

Big house, great sex, and very loving dogs. I'd probably stay till tomorrow or until I get bored. Setting my food down, I lean back against the cushions, trying to get comfortable.

I could see her eyeing me as she watched TV, it only pissed me off because she wouldn't say what's on her mind. Pressing my foot into her side I get her attention.

"What do you want?" She looked down at her food, chuckling to herself.

"You're gonna laugh if I say." She snorted, setting her food down.

"So? Just say whatever it is, dickwad." I kicked her a little harder. She smiled and gave In.

"Fine. I was gonna ask if I could lay with you."  She bit her lip nervously. Her hands wrangled together.

"Hah, what a wimp. Sure." I motioned for her to lay with me.

She gave a bright smile and laid herself onto of me, her face burying in my neck. The weight of her body wasn't much but it felt very comforting. Wrapping my arms around her shoulders and my legs around her waist I secretly basked in the warmth.

"You're heavy." I pulled her hair lightly, making her grunt.

"You're comfortable." She laughed into my neck.

I shouldn't be this close with her. I never intended to get this close with her, but I liked it. I really hated that I liked it… that I liked her.

I like her…

It pissed me off that I liked her. I hadn't had a serious relationship before and I don't plan to. The closest I'd gotten was "friends with benefits" and even then that was too close.

I didn't like when men or women cuddled me, I didn't like being around them for extended periods. I didn't like having this opportunity for them to hurt me, to get attached when I would just leave again.

Hard to want a relationship when you're wanted by the police for killing your parents. I've done well on hiding and changing myself to not be caught but someone always manages to come after me eventually.

In all honesty I should have left when that hit man came after me. I should have booked it to another state or country. But I stayed, I'm being selfish.

I like the life I have now, I'm tired of moving, of running. I liked the money I made, I liked my house, I even liked her…

I know that if another comes after me, if it catches up to me I'll have to leave. So I'll just be selfish, I'll enjoy this as long as I can, I just want to be loved a little longer.

"You're thinking very loudly." She hummed against my neck, her hand tracing pattern on my side. 

"You don't know what you're talking about." I scratched the nape of her neck lightly. She's warm, smells good, and makes me feel cared for.

"Mm, guess not. If you wanna talk we can." She lifted her head to look at me, blue eyes so warm and open.

She's nice, much nicer than she needed to be or should be. I don't want to hurt her, I don't want her to fall in love and have me leave her.

"I can't date you… I can't be your girlfriend." She would get mad, she would throw me out and ignore me.

"Is it because you don't want to or because you won't allow yourself to?" She sat up but dragged me with her. Sitting back against the couch she pulled me into her lap and held me tightly.

"The latter…" She's too nice. She shouldn't be nice, I rejected her, twice today and she's still being kind.

"Why do you think you can't? Afraid to get hurt? Don't want to hurt me? Can't handle love?" Her hand stroked my back, her fingers methodically moving along me.

"All. I've never known a stable relationship before." I laughed to myself, anger for myself quickly bubbling.

"Neither have I." She laughed. I was surprised, anyone would kill to date her.

"I don't do well with them. I had one or at least thought I did and she ruined me for a good part of my life. Any woman or man that's come after that has either wanted my money or just sex." She looked off into the massive window, her eyes clouded.

"So did I… so why am I special?" 

"I don't know, but I find myself drawn to you. You're an asshole, very snarky, condescending, rude, bossy, and an overall bitch yet I can't stop thinking about you every day." She looked at me, I mean really looked at me.

She had nothing but adoration in her eyes, the same look from the car. I could tell that she had some fear in them, but that only left me confused.

"I think about you a lot. I wish for you to spend everyday with me, to never leave me. I want to have a future with you, I want to spoil you with the world and that terrifies me. I haven't felt this strong for someone in a long time and it makes me shake with fear." Her hand tangled into my hair, running her fingers slowly.

"I would do anything for you, Amilia." I hadn't realized that I was crying till she wiped the tears away.

I felt so angry, so stupid, so selfish. I hated how I felt, I hated crying, I hated myself. Her hand cupped my cheek and tilted my head up, her eyes making me feel so exposed. 

"I won't pester you with asking to be mine, truly and fully, but I want you to know I'll be here. I will wait for you for as long as it takes." 

Her lips captured mine, tears slipping from my eyes as I kissed her back. I didn't deserve love nor did I deserve her to care so deeply for me, but I wanted it.

Wrapping my arms around her neck I keep her impossibly close, my hands falling into her hair. Her arms circle my waist and keeping me secure, the kiss burning with passion. I didn't want it to stop, I didn't want this feeling in my chest to ever leave.

Both of us pull away gasping for air, her eyes half lidded and full of compassion. I wanted to kiss her more but her door was swung open with Axe and Damien rushing in.

They looked at us with wide eyes, pushing myself off her, I turned to hide my tears stained face.

"Whoa what's going on here?" Damien teased us.

"This better be good. Otherwise I'm kicking both your asses." She sounded pissed. Turning back I saw her standing and staring the two down.

"Enrique got… a package about the… breakfast club?" Damien sounded so unsure. It's so obvious he's lying.

"Okay? And how did that go for him?" She rubbed her temple in annoyance.

"A neighbor got to it first and took Enriques' dogs… for a walk." Axe spoke this time, they both obviously were lying in front of me.

"Right… I'll come but go downstairs." She waved them off, her arms crossed.

They left with Damien waving me goodbye. She turned to me with an apologetic smile, coming closer she smiled.

"I would love to continue this conversation but I have to go help them." Her hands held mine.

"Right, with Enriques dogs." I snarked. She chuckled and nodded.

"He's bad at lying but I promise to tell you soon. You're welcome to stay, if not I'll have my driver take you home." She pressed a kiss to my lips.

"I'll stay for now but I'm gonna go shopping and ruin this house of yours." I smirked. She raised a brow and nodded.

"Hurt my pockets and my home. You are a cruel woman." Reaching to the coffee table she took out a card and handed it to me with a kiss on the lips.

"Get whatever you want, and order dinner for me tonight, yeah?" She walks off to get dressed.

"Fine… only because I'll be hungry."

_____________

Az left a bit ago, I decided since I don't have anything to wear over here that I'd just wear something of hers. Not having any dresses or skirts, I just threw on some of her casual clothes.

Blue jeans, black crew neck, and a long overcoat with some Nikes. Grabbing my purse and wallet I head out to do some shopping. When I got in the elevator I sent a text to Max to meet me downtown.

Going through the lobby and outside I found her driver waiting for me. He opened the door and closed it as I got in. The car started and took off, getting stuck a bit of traffic but fine otherwise.

Reaching my spot I saw Max waiting in front of a car dealership. Noticing me he waved and approached me with a hug.

"This is new? You don't dress this casually." He gave a laugh, his chubby cheeks a little flushed.

"It's Whitlock's. Shall we?" I opened the door and went inside.

We looked around at the different cars, laughing and joking as we inspected and sat in them. The attendees kept glaring at us every so often, they probably think we can't afford anything here. One came up with a tight smile.

"Do you plan to buy something or are you… looking?" He had a very snooty attitude which just made me laugh.

"We'll buy when we're ready." I waved him off, tuning back into Max and I's conversation.

"If you don't plan to buy anything I'm gonna have to ask you to leave." He opened the door and motioned for us to get out.

Max looked worried but I got out of the car, walking to the front desk with the lady behind it.

"Excuse me, but how much to buy all these cars?" Her eyes bugged out and she looked at the man trying to usher us out.

"You're joking." He scoffed. Calling his bluff I took my phone out and dialed a number while they conversed in secret.

"Amilia, what are-"

"Hold that thought." I held a finger to Max's lips. The phone picks up and a husky voice comes through.

"Hey Princess, what's up?" There was some rustling and grunting in the background but I brushed it off.

"I'm at Primary Exoitcs and I want all the cars. They're being rather rude to me buying one, so now I want all of them." I checked my nails without a second thought.

"All the cars? I thought you were better. You should be aiming higher, Princess." She was teasing me, I could practically hear her cocky smile. 

"You have my attention." I needed a manicure after this.

"I'll buy the company, and promptly fire the man. Thankfully you're my assistant so schedule a meeting and I'll be sure to be there when necessary." There was loud thud and grunt in the background.

"Thank you Azy." I smiled despite my slight worry about the noise.

"Anytime. I do have to go though, be safe." There was a loud banging before the line went silent. Shrugging it off I look at the two.

"I'll be buying the company. Have your boss call me 2 days from now to schedule something." Taking a card from my wallet I handed it to the confused looking man.

"You're bluffing." He hissed.

"I'm gonna enjoy firing your little twink ass." Turning on my heels I promptly walk out with Max behind me.

"Whitlock Enterprise bitches." He flipped them off with a smile.

We laughed once outside and had the driver take us to get our nails done. It took a little over 2 hours for our nails, after we went and bought mountains of clothes for each of us.

By the time night hit we were saying goodbyes and I was heading back to her place. Tipping the driver and heading up I opened the door and made my way to her room.

Dropping the bags on the closet floor I took them out and made room in her closet. She had space and a nice house, not to mention I'd get away from my roommate and her friends.

Taking a new maroon bathing suit out I stripped and changed into it. Ordering food as I grabbed a towel and went downstairs, going out to the patio I found the large pool waiting. Testing the water I found it to be warm, it must be heated then.

Diving in and swimming around I looked out at the city, enjoying the night sky and sound of the never sleeping city. I floated and relaxed for a while until I felt eyes on me. Turning my head I found Azrael leaning on the doorframe, hands in her pockets and watching me.

"You look like a creep." I scoffed. She smiled and moved closer to the pool.

"Can't help it. You look pretty." She crouched down at the edge of the pool.

"Oh yeah? You know what you look like?" I leaned on the edge, pushing myself up to ghost my lips over hers.

"What?"

"Wet."

Grabbing her shirt I pulled her in with a splash, laughing when she came up with a baffled look. Her eyes narrowed and a smile broke out on her lips.

"Oh you're in for it." I squealed and tried swimming away but she caught me and lifted me in her arms. Twirling me around and dunking me underwater with her.

I fought in her back with a smile and laugh, slapping her to let me go. She refused and kept splashing me. Giving up I wrapped myself around her, slicking her hair back for her.

Cupping her cheeks I watched the water drops roll down her chiseled face, her eyes bright and full of life. Leaning in I pressed my lips to her, squeezing my legs around her tighter. She grunted and pulled back.

"Fuck!" She hissed in pain.

"What? What's wrong?" I looked her over, my hands resting on her shoulders.

"N-nothing. Just pulled something." She waved it off but her face gave it away.

"Az…" I removed myself from her hold and pushed her towards the edge.

"I'm fine, it's just a scratch." She tried laughing it off but I didn't care.

I noticed the water around us was getting red and bloody, this made my worry skyrocket. She kept making excuses but I made her sit on the edge of the shallow end.

"Amilia I swear that its-"

"Just shut up." I gave her a pointed glare. She huffed and did as told. 

Unbuttoning her shirt I found a nasty wound on her left side, it wasn't bleeding too bad but the wound was huge. It would definitely leave a scar.

"Amilia…"

"What happened?" I traced my fingers on the outer edge of the wound.

"Got cut."

"Doing?"

"It was a fight, I'll be fine." 

"It looks bad."

"I've had worse." 

I guess I never really looked at her body this closely or at least paid attention. Most of the time when we did things it was dark or moving too fast for me to notice. She had more scars adorning her body, most small and unnoticeable unless youre up close.

Some looked like bullet wounds, others like cuts. How the hell did she get them? I mean it's obvious she's done things, but gunshot wounds?

"Where were you tonight?" My eyes finally met hers.

"Enriques, I was-"

"Azrael. I'm serious." 

She looked nervous, her eyes showed worry and fear. She's usually confident, this made me nervous.

"I was with Enrique but… it wasn't good. It was a drug deal gone bad." She scoffed, her eyes avoiding mine all together.

Drug deal?

She sells drugs?! Why? She's wealthy…

"Amilia, I'm not a good person. I do bad things, very bad things to people. Some who deserve it and others who don't." I moved to the stairs of the pool, stepping out and wrapping myself up.

Her eyes downcast as I moved for the door to the house, stopping just before entering, I looked at her.

"Come inside. Let me help you get cleaned up." She nodded and stood to her feet with a grunt.

Going in we showered and dried off, I stayed in some short shorts and a tank top. She wore sweats and a sports bra, holding a rag to her slightly bleeding wound.

Sitting in the kitchen I had her sit down while I started to stitch up the wound. She kept her eyes averted, but so did I, how am I supposed to react to this?

"What do you actually do?" I broke the silence. Her hand on the table balled into a fist, a scowl on her face.

"Crime. I'm… I'm in the mafia." She sounded so quiet, like she was ashamed.

The mafia…

She in the fucking mafia?