Chapter 3

  We woke up about 2 hours later, knowing we had work to do still, thankfully, our room is sound-proofed. We walked down the hall, hand, and hand, so much love passing between us. Our hearts are just so full, I am so happy. Time moves so slowly, as if I'm trying to savor every moment of right now. Saving this feeling, the look in his eyes and the smile of his face. The happiness I feel, completely and utterly in love with my husband, and loved by my husband, my children, my family, and friends. This is what I will fight for, this is what I will picture when shit gets hard. We will have this again.

  I breathe in the smell of my home, the wood stove, the cigarette smoke that sneaks in from the smoking room, our dogs, gain, pot smoke. Not perfect, but a home that is lived in, that we raised our children in, the place we have tons of memories in, the one we dreamed of, the one we built. Our hall is not that long, but in time wise it felt like it took an hour to walk down it, but you know what? I am happy to do it again. Truthfully, I should have cherished everything a little more, even before I knew it was the beginning of the end in a few days. Like they say, Hine sight is 20/20.

  We walked into the living room, and see Justin is holding the baby, and Lexi is flipping through channels. When they see us, they light up. WE love these three so much. We just wish we could see them more. I signal to them they can just chill for now and walked into the kitchen to get a coke zero, and a diet coke for Robby. I'm guessing Red, Sal, and Peggy, and Jake took a few minutes for themselves also. Good for them. We are going to be under a lot of stress in a few days. So, you have to take the moments when you can. I walk back out to the living room, and see that Lexi found something to watch for the moment, and now Robby is holding the baby. He is playing with bat-dads' neckless and smiling. Justin is kicked back on the sofa watching the show that is on. They already look worn out. As a mom I want to tell them to go to their rooms and go to sleep; but as the person that seen what I did, I know I can't.

  I walk back out to the kitchen and grab two more Coke zeros for Justin and Lexi. They need some caffeine before we start in an hour or so. I'm just waiting until the full moon is lined up with the front windows, so the process of breaking the chains is easier. I walk to the cupboard and on the top shelf I grab my meds that make it easy to cross to Red Earth. It puts me on a cloud, and my worries go away, my nerves don't fight it, and it makes me feel kind of drunk. I get it for my M.S, but I really don't take it very much because of those things. I grab 4 just to make sure I'm at a spot that I can let go. And I'm not much of a drinker so this has to work. I'm supposed to take 3 in a day, so 4 should be the right amount, because I didn't take anything today. I take the 4 small red capsules and wash them down with my soda. I walk to the fridge and grab the coke zeros and head back to the living room to give the kids theirs. Lexi reaches for hers while laughing, because the baby has her hair in one hand and her shirt in the other.

  Walking to Robby and sitting on his lap; As he wraps his arms round me, we hear boots coming up the back stairs into the smokingroom. Red and Sal open the back door quietly. When they walked in they seen that we are all watching T.V and they relax.

 Sal said," Boy, that felt like sneaking a girl into my bedroom after curfew." With a laugh." I'm glad, you guys are up. We didn't find really anything, but Red feels that you already know what to do." The back door opened once again and Peggy and Jake walks in quietly. Just like Red and Sal, they relaxed when they realized we are all up.

  Peggy said," Everyone get some R and R? and feel recharged? Or did you spend your time doing other activities?" with a laugh. "How are we going to do this thing? Truthfully, I have no idea what to do, but all you have to do, is tell me what to do, and I'll do It." Everyone agreed with that statement in an instant.

  That would be wonderful, if I knew exactly what they must do. I don't really know what I have to do, let alone them.

   Red said, that I know what to do inside me. Well, first thing first, I need is V to work on her bubble of safety. Walking up the stairs, everyone asks where I was going. I told them I was going to wake up the kids, because Its going to take all of us. I walked into V's room, and its pitch black like normal, this girl loves the dark. I find her bed by stubbing my toe and yelping out in pain.

"Mom? You ok." V asked.

"Yes. I just caught my toe on your bed, and it fucking hurts. GRRRRRRRRRRR!" I said, in a laughing crying tone.I sit on her bed rubbing my toe trying to make it stop throbbing

"Baby, I have to talk to you." I said to her, as she was interrupting me in the V way.

  "Mom, I already know. Bad things are going to happen. You need to break your mental chains and you need me to make my bubble around you. You want the others to help power it because you don't know what is going to happen." She said, in the best way she could, because of her speech problem.

  "Yeah. That's about it. Do you think you can do it?" I ask her.

  "Mom, I got you. Don't worry, myside is covered, ok. I love you, and I feel the stress coming off you. It will work. We will be ok. This is what is supposed to happen, Grandma B, told me so, and has been working with me." She said, with such confidence.

  My fucking mouth fell open. I made the face. It has been a long time since I've been surprised and wow, this is a surprise.

 I replied with the only thing my mouth could form, "O."

  With that lesson, I just learned from my 16-year-old. I stood up, and on the way out I said, "Baby, please be downstairs in 10 minutes. Thankyou." While thinking to myself, it had been a while since I've seen my grandma B. around. I see my grandma B. more now that she has passed, then when she was alive. I guess my family is lucky, because when people pass around us, we get to see them still.

 Getting to Dax's room I knocked, and then I hear him say," I'm coming Mom. You can still come in though."

 I turned the doorknob, and pushed the door open, to see my 18-year old, "baby boy," towering before me; already to go.I turn around on my heels, knowing that my medication is most likely starting to kick in, and I probably shouldn't do that. I head back downstairs to the living room.

  When I get downstairs to the living room. It seems V was ready all along in her dark, toe hurting room, because she is downstairs, and telling everyone to push the furniture out of the way and make a big wide open area in front of the windows. Once that job was done, she starts putting stars on the floor with duct tape, for places were people stand. Next, she took that tape, and made a huge circle in the middle of the stars. She was on a mission. Grandma B must have given her step by step on what to do. Finally, she stood up and turned towards everyone, standing, and watching her go, and she said, "Mom is in the middle, of course. The inner circle goes me in front of mom, to my left is dad, to my right is Lexi, next to Lexi is Dax, then between dad and Dax its Justin. OK?

 We all nod are head for the response.

  The second ring goes, left of me is Peggy, to my right is Red, next to Red is Sal, then Jake is between Sal and Peggy. OK?"

 We Nodded again.

  After a weird silence, I just cleared my throat and said, "Our family gifts at work, with a smile on my face."

  The moon is nearly at its peak in the window, and I can feel the meds relaxing me. So, I said "I guess, its go time, people. No time like the present, or some shit like that."

 I walked to the table and grabbed my wireless, loud, ear buds and put non-stop dubstep on my phone. I walked to the middle of the circle andeveryone else went to their corresponding spots. As everyone settles, V holds her arms out, everybody started to copy. With everyone's fingers about six inches apart, V started talking, "these are protective rings. The protection is for Mom and everyone else, including that beautiful baby in the basinet, in my room in dreamland. How mom taught me to make my protection bubble is to think of an unbreakable bubble and make it bigger and bigger. This bubble is your bubble, it can be made of what you want, and it can look how you want it to look. Now make your bubble join with the bubble of the people on each side of you. Together you are strong. You cannot be broken. Close your eyes and concentrate on your united bubbles.

 I thought to myself before I started, on how grown up she is now and that her speech was so clear for all of that. With that I smile and put my ear buds in; I close my eyes and feel the familiar butterflies. At first feel like I am falling; falling in to the nothing. Then a sensation that I am going up. In a flash I'm in the Grand Hallway. Orna, Roza, and the Horner twins are waiting for me. They know why I am here. They say in Unison, "You, have to give us the full permission to cross

  Then Orna says alone, "You cannot be full, to do what you are planning. You must break our chains. We will have an unbreakable truce with you as soon as we all have passed through fully. We will help fight your coming war. This I vow. None of the Red Earth residents will ever try to hurt you. They are sworn to you. We will die for you, and your family. To do what you are doing. Break our chains that bind you to our doors, and travel to the end and go through, and you will find what you seek. It will not be easy. It will test your true self. If you are balanced, you have nothing to fear. If you're not, then you will cause what you wish to stop.."Be yourself is my advice to you, and then you will have nothing to fear. But first you have to let go."

  I inhale and exhale, and I imagine the chains and at first, I see them strong and unbreakable. But then I think of the love of my family, what they are willing to do for me and the chain starts to look weak. I see Orna motion for me to do more. I feel the sweet kisses my kids gave me when they were little, and the tender touches my husband does. How, no-matter-what, we say I love you, every time we leave a room. My grandbaby sleeping in his bassinet. Suddenly, I see the chain links break under the weight of our love for one another, and Orna's pulling. I set them free. One by one they walk out the door to Earth; not in me, but as themselves, the first time my love ones are seeing them in person. Orna said, they are going to line up like V and the others, with their arms out to, for extra protection, and that all my personalities will be out also. I must be empty. I get what that means now. I walk down the Grand Hallway, towards, a thing I can only describe as the stargate, from the movie or T.V. show stargate. On my way to it there are so many different "doorways" I didn't even know about. Different worlds, Different dimensions of Earth, So many doorways. I started to run; it feels like I have been here forever. When I finally reached the right door, I took a breath and said, "Be myself." And walked through.