Ch. 5 Low Expectations

Olivia

“Wake up, Red. Time to go.” I feel a nudge but I don’t move, my brain struggling to come online. 

My mouth is drier than the Sahara and a dozen tiny men with tiny little jackhammers are pummeling my skull. My limbs feel like lead bricks as I try to sit up. Where am I and why is something hard poking my backside?

Blinking my eyes against the harsh sunlight, Kaden’s face comes into focus and I suck in a breath. Scenes from last night flood my brain and warmth fills my belly. They’re here. My mates, the men I love, are actually here and they spent the whole night making love to me.

“Good morning,” I pull the sheet up to my chest and offer Kaden a shy smile. But he doesn’t smile back at me. His face is a stony mask and his eyes are cold. “Wh-, what’s wrong?” I stutter, trembling from the chill his look provokes.

“Nothing at all, little flower.” His voice is hard, the pet name sounding all wrong in that tone. He shoves my dress at me just as Declan stirs behind me. “Last night was fun but play time’s over. Declan and I have somewhere to be and you need to leave.”

“But-” I suck my bottom lip between my teeth to stop it from wobbling. “I don’t understand.”

“What don’t you understand? We fucked, it was fun. You didn’t think it actually meant something, did you? Come on, Red. You’re smarter than that.”

Declan sits up and runs his nose down the back of my neck, his hand caressing my arm. The same move last night made me shiver in pleasure. Now, it leaves me cold.

“Come on, Kade. We can make time for one more round, can’t we?” He presses his hard cock between my butt cheeks, his lips kissing my shoulder. 

“No, we can’t.” Kaden grits through his clenched jaw. “Olivia, get the fuck out! Now!”

His Alpha bark has me scrambling from the bed. I hurry to the bathroom and shut the door behind me, fighting back tears as I pour myself back into the skin-tight frock. How could I let this happen? How could I be so stupid as to think they’d want me for real?

“Fuck, Kade! Why are you being such a cock block? You can’t tell me you don’t want another taste of her. She’s a fucking vixen!” 

“She’s a mistake! That’s what she is! Did you see that dreamy, doe-eyed look on her face? She actually thought last night meant something. There is no way we’re fueling her pathetic obsession any more than we already have. What the fuck were we thinking, actually fucking the pitiful thing?”

A wave of nausea roils in my gut, forcing me out of the dream. I roll out of bed and drag myself to the bathroom, emptying the contents of my stomach into the toilet then pad to the sink to brush my teeth. 

It’s been two months since that night I spent with my mates, only to have them throw me away like a piece of trash. Two months since I heard Kaden admit I was nothing more than the night’s entertainment. Two months since I ran from their room, praying I could forget it ever happened. 

But every morning, I wake to the same memory, torturing myself with thoughts of their heated looks and sinful touches before cruelly tossing me aside. I’m such a flipping idiot, thinking they’d finally realized we’re meant for each other. Then I remind myself I should have known better, been smarter, just like Kaden said.

At least the tears have run dry. I cried for weeks over them until finally, I couldn’t cry anymore. But no sooner had the tears stopped coming than the nausea set in., my constant friend for the past two weeks. 

“Pup!” My wolf declares and I squeeze my eyes shut tight against the possibility. 

“There’s no pup. It’s just stress.” I argue, willing it to be true. 

“We have to tell mates. They’ll want us then.” She continues as if I never spoke. 

“I’m not telling mates anything!” I growl. Lady huffs at my unveiled distaste for the word but that’s just too bad. “I won’t trap them with a pup. They accept me for me or not at all!” 

Despite Lady’s declaration and the obvious symptoms, I’ve managed to live in my little bubble of denial. But with each passing day, I know it’s only a matter of time until that little bubble pops and I have to face reality. So I’ve decided to take the pin in my own hand and pop that sucker myself. 

Tomorrow, Kaden and Declan leave for several months of training before they’ll return to take over the pack. Tonight is their farewell party, an event I had no intention of attending. But it’s my last chance to tell them the truth, that they’re my mates, before they go. It’s a fool’s hope they’ll actually believe me but if I am pregnant, at least some day I can tell our pup that I tried. 

When the time for the party finally rolls around, I’m one of the first people there, anxious to get this catastrophe of a conversation over with. I stake out the door and thank my lucky stars when Kaden and Declan walk in together. Two birds, one stone. 

“I need to speak to you both.” I waste no time marching right up to them with more confidence than I feel. 

“Sorry, Red. I know we’re addictive. Once you’ve had a taste, you want more. But we don’t do repeats and we already have a date for the night.” A cruel smirk accompanies Kaden’s flippant comment.

“You're my mates!” The words spill out on a wave of frustration. I hadn’t planned to tell them that way but I can’t take it back now. “Both of you.”

“Wh-, what?” Declan stammers, like he can’t believe I have the gall to suggest such a thing.

“That’s enough, Olivia!” Kaden growls in anger. “You’re embarrassing yourself. Your little obsession has gone too far. Fuck! I knew we never should have slept with you!” He adds under his breath.

“My “little obsession?” I bite back sarcastically. "Trust me, you are the last men I'd choose to obsess over but the pull of the mate bond leaves me no choice! I shifted on my fifteenth birthday, by the way. My wolf scented you the same day. I’ve lived with this nightmare for three years. How dare you act like I’m burdening you with this revelation!

“I don’t know why the Moon Goddess did this to me. I wish I could explain it but I can’t. I wish it never happened but it did. I know you can’t scent me but I thought you deserved to know.”

I’m proud of the certainty in my tone, my voice never wavers. But inside, what’s left of my heart is shattering into tiny shards as I watch Kaden’s face harden, his lips pulled back in a snarl. Declan just stares at me incredulously.

“Stop it, now, Olivia! Lying about a mate bond is desperate behavior!” Kaden sneers at me, revulsion in his eyes. “Only the strongest wolves shift early and even then they can’t scent their mates. It’s pathetic you would suggest such a thing!

“We’ll find our true mates soon enough and when we do, we’ll treat them like the queens they are. A mate is a gift,” He lowers his voice and leans in to speak in my ear, “but I guarantee you, neither of us are mated to a damaged, weak, pathetic thing like you, let alone both of us. Who the fuck do you think you are, thinking I’d ever find you worthy of being my Luna! You disgust me!”

"Kaden’s right, We’re not mates." Declan finally speaks. "Your wolf is weak. You could never run a pack, not even as Beta Female. You have to let it go.”

I dig my fingernails into my palms to hold back the tears. Deep down I expected this outcome. I should have been prepared for the pain but the impulse to cry catches me off guard. 

“I wish I could say I'm surprised but my expectations were low. I hope you’re better pack leaders than you are mates.” I bite out.   

Somehow, I manage to turn and walk away. They don’t try to stop me, not that I expected them to. I make it all the way home before the tears break free.

“Fuuuuck!” I scream at the top of my lungs. I never curse but find it surprisingly cathartic. 

My mind spins with what to do next as I go through the motions of pulling on comfy clothes and looking around for my keys. Then I stumble out the door and straight to my car. 

With no destination in mind, I drive into the night, taking nothing more than my wallet and the clothes on my back. I have no idea what to do next. I only know one thing for sure. 

My life in Glass Lake is over.