CHAPTER 4

"See you tomorrow, sweetheart."

I heave another deep sigh when I heard Dion's voice in my head again, repeating the same words he uttered earlier like a pirated tape, and an old radio unable to reach the good signal.

I am currently laying on my bed, Caroline is here with me since we decided to have a sleepover, like what we always do even on our childhood days.

"That's the 13th time you sighed for the past few minutes, Zhanaia." she mumbles while still busy on her phone.

And again, I sighed.

"14th."

She's counting.

I pushes myself up and sat on the right side of the bed, it's nearing 10 pm but we are still awake. Caroline is busy with something on her phone, while I, well, I can't sleep because Dion's voice keeps on ringing in my head with the same words he uttered earlier.

"See you tomorrow, sweetheart."

For an unknown reason, I felt something like butterflies in my stomach. Like those that I have read on romance books, plus the abnormal beats of my heart. It so suddenly beats erratically fast.

"Sweetheart," I muttered. "He called me 'sweetheart'."

Caroline rolls her eyes and puts her phone down. She faced me with her brows raised, her eyes narrowed like a street on a hamlet.

"Zhanaia, the word 'sweetheart' is an endearment. Dion came from the US which means he is an American, and Americans often call ladies with endearment such as babe, baby, honey, love, sweetheart, and such. So, stop thinking that there's a deep reason why he called you 'sweetheart'."

Caroline being Caroline, she savagely told those words to me, personally, without hesitation. I look at her flatly and shook my head.

"You're too savage," I mumbled.

She shrugged. "Well, I am. And you know that."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. She's a straight-to-the-point person. She voices out the words she wanted to tell, and she doesn't think if you'll get hurt or what. As she always says, the truth hurts.

"Let the reality slap you, even if it hurts. Because if you will keep yourself clueless and blind by the truth, you'll get hurt even more, and you will be crushed slowly."

She said that one time we were talking about her being the savage queen. And I agree with her belief. That even if reality sucks, we should let it slap us, and face it. Because if we will keep ourselves clueless and blind, we would just end up being broken than ever.

We spent our time talking about things again, like what we always do. Lights off, the door is closed, the room's window is open, the moonlight gives a romantic vibe to the room, plus the cool breeze of the silent night.

Nothing has changed, we are still the old Zhanaia, and Caroline, the best duo ever. Simple things make us laugh, we crack corny jokes, throwback, talk some things about what might happen in the future, talk about our celebrity crushes, and so on.

And until our conversation went to Dion, we are still talking at 11:30 pm.

"Butterflies in your stomach and your heart beats erratically?"

I nodded. I just told her what I felt after Dion used the endearment 'sweetheart' to me. Caroline shook her head in disbelief, she lazily fell on the soft mattress and closed her eyes.

"If that one continues, you're doomed."

My gaze met hers. "What do you mean?"

She gave me a slight smile. "Zhanaia, I'm not sure with this yet, that's why I won't tell you as of now. But keep on telling me what you feel whenever you are with that man, so I will know what it is."

After that, she closed her eyes and went to sleep. I called her name several times but I didn't get an answer. Her words stuck in my head, mixing with the random thought running inside it. I ceased my forehead as I repeat what she said multiple times before I finally close my eyes to sleep.

"If this continues, you're doomed."

What does she mean?

I am currently waiting for Dion at Miró Coffee, the said meeting place picked by him. It's just 8:16 am, I went here at 8 am, so basically, I am 30 minutes early.

Caroline's words still linger in my head, that doomed thing she is talking about, I still don't get it. I tried asking her earlier but she just smiled.

"You'll know soon. If you wouldn't know it by me, you would know it by yourself. You will find it out, whether you like it or not."

Caroline is my best friend since childhood, I know her too well. She is not the type of person who loves suspense, as I have said she is savage—a straight to the point person. But if she suspense something, that only means two things.

She wants me to realize something or she thinks it is better not to tell it for now.

At exactly 8:30 am, Dion arrived with his cool and chill aura. With his, both hands on the pocket of his tattered jeans, paired with a white shirt with the text 'LEVIS' in bold font at the center, and his white shoes with a checkmark on the side, indicating it's brand, his slightly messy brownish hair that compliments his face, with a bright smile like a morning sun, plus the eyeglasses he is wearing that also compliments his ocean blue eyes. He cooly entered the coffee shop, and almost all of the customers' attention turned to him.

Admiration is visible in their eyes, the group of high school girls on the side—well, base from how I see them, starts giggling. They even took their phones out, I shook my head when they positioned the camera to Dion's direction.

"This one is a head-turner." I thought.

As he sat on the chair in front of me, girls' eyes were still glued to him and seem like he doesn't care at all. He's so cool and full of poise.

"Good morning, sweetheart!" he greets and winked at me.

I heard some of the girls at my back giggles, perhaps because they saw Dion winks. And perhaps they heard his deep, manly voice. So deep like it came from an old well, so manly as how manly he is.

"Morning," I mumble.

I didn't mind him calling me 'sweetheart' for as what Caroline has said, it is an endearment and Americans love calling ladies with endearment. She told me I shouldn't think too much about it. And that is what I am doing right now.

Dion asked me if how's my night, we spent five minutes talking before he went to the counter and ordered a hot choco.

Ladies' were still glued to him, a girl whom I think is 16 years old even approached me and asked if I am Dion's girlfriend. That was an epic one.

As Dion stood proudly and manly on the counter while waiting for his order, I can hear girls murmuring and giggling from behind. Some even took photos of him, probably they will flex him on social media.

When he comes back on our table, I asked him in a low voice,

"Aren't you aware that people are admiring you and staring at you from afar?"

He shrugged and sips on his hot choco before saying, "I know. But I just don't mind them. I am used to it. People—most especially teenagers, admiring me and staring at me from afar. Even when I was still studying in Harvard."

"Oh." I nodded. "That's why it seems like you don't care at all."

That made him chuckle. "It's not that, I don't care. I care, but I choose not to mind their admiring stares and giggles. 'Cause if I would, they're too many, I will be an instant Hollywood star."

I chuckled. "You compare yourself to a Hollywood star, huh?"

"Why not? I mean, if I go on an audition, I will surely win. It's not that I am humble. I know how to be proud of myself." he utter.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. He is a down to Earth man when it comes to his life status, yea. But with his physical appearance? Oh, Dionysus is a very proud man.

We left the coffee shop at 9 am. Today, we are going to the Rietberg Museum and Rieter Park. We will spend three hours in the museum and another three hours or so in Rieter Park.

Rietberg Museum is the third largest museum in Zurich, Switzerland that displays non-European art and designs. It has a variety of Asian, American, African and Oceanian art.

Standing in front of us is one of Zurich's attractive structure, that looks like a palace from the ancient time, the main building of Rietberg Museum.

Rietberg Museum attracts a lot of visitors, because of its palace-like structure and of course, the creative artworks displayed inside, especially during summer and whenever they are having an art exhibition.

As we entered the main building, Dion is becoming more energetic and talkative. I guess arts can really hype him up.

We paid for the museum's entrance fee. After that, our tour started.

From the first floor, various of creatively made non-European artworks were displayed. Just like yesterday, instead of me, explaining the artworks to Dion, it was Dion who's explaining.

And after three hours of roaming around the museum, we headed to our next stop which is the Rieter Park, where we decided to take our lunch. But before that, we went to the nearest store first to buy food.

In canned, bread, biscuits, chips, bottled water, and of course, the picnic blanket.

Numbers of families having a picnic on each side, and some couples having a date is present, and of course, the benches and the green grass that is perfect for a picnic.

These things welcomed us as soon as we arrived at Rieter Park. Dion even mumbled that it is heartwarming seeing such scenes.

"I missed how we use to have a family picnic every weekend before." he suddenly mumbles.

I turned my gaze to him, "What is it?"

He put his right hand in his pocket and look at the sky that is now covered with white clouds, which helps us not to feel the sun's heat.

"When I was a child, we use to take vacations here in Switzerland. And every weekend, we use to have a family picnic in this park, because according to them, this place is their meeting place when dad was still courting mom, and it turned to be their favorite place."

"And as I child who's in a very good and happy family, this one became one of my favorite places as well. Sadly, when I turned 8, we stop having vacations here, and until the accident happened, we didn't have the chance to come back here. And yea it's been 12 years since the last time I come here."

He then smiled. "And it's good to be back here after long years."

That put a bright smile on my face. I'm glad that he feels good to be back here.

As we set the picnic blanket, our lips are stretched for a smile. A smile like a world doesn't face any problem, a smile that says we are enjoying and appreciating the moment, and no one can ruin it.

We both sat at the picnic blanket after setting it up. We don't have that picnic basket where the foods are stored, rather we have paper bags where the ready-to-eat foods we bought from the grocery store a while ago are stored.

Dion and I serve each of them. We bought easy-open canned foods for less hassle. And as we start eating, we start another conversation that talks about ourselves.

"My mom use to cook my favorite lasagna, and dad's favorite salmon before. These two will never be out to our food whenever we go for a picnic. And we won't eat if mom wasn't the one who cooked it."

"You mean, since your mother died, you never eat lasagna again?"

He shook his head and smiled, making me blink a couple of times. He never eats his favorite food since his mother died. That's uhh...

"I know it shocks you, but yea. I never eat my favorite lasagna for a long time now."

"Why don't you try to eat one again?" I try suggesting.

He shook his again and smiled bitterly. "I don't think I can still it lasagna. I am used to mom's recipe."

"Don't you want to give it a try?"

"Nah. Mom's lasagna holds a special place in my heart, and I promise not to taste one again except if it's my future wife. But you see," he chuckled, "Anytime, I can bleed. Every time that I spent in this world is counted because of my Brain Hemorrhage. Anytime, I can die. So, I don't think I have the chance to have a wife."

"And that simply means I don't have the chance to taste lasagna again." he continued.

I stared at him for a while, baffled. The way he speaks about he can die anytime, he says it like it's just nothing. He says it like dying is a small thing.

Perhaps because he already accepted the fact that he wouldn't last long? I shrugged. That's how I say it.

"But Dion, don't you can think you still have a chance to live?" I ask.

"What do you mean?" he slightly raised an eyebrow.

I took a bite on the sliced bread with mayonnaise I am holding, chew it in my mouth, and then swallowed it before giving him an answer.

"You see, you're still alive. And as long as you live, as long as there is life, there is hope. What I am trying to say is, why don't you be optimistic about your condition? Like, push away the thought of you'll die, instead focus on hoping and praying for you to live longer."

He chuckled. "I already lost hope, Zhanaia. And even if I hope and pray, it's no use because there's no reason for me to live. Dad is busy handling our hospitals and he doesn't have time for me. Mom was long gone, and I lost my first love as well." he said the phrase, almost a whisper.

My brows furrowed as I ask him, "You lost... your first love?"

He nods. "Yea. My first love. Janice."

And that's when he started telling me about his first love, whom he lost because of his Brain Hemorrhage.

The name is Janice Fajarde, she is Dion's childhood best friend. They were the best duo back then, partner in crime, and the human diary of each other. Because of the accident that made Dion lay in the hospital bed for years, Janice became distant to him when he woke up. The warmth of their friendship fade, but even so, Dion still pursued their friendship back for he can't bear to lose Janice.

Luckily, her old friend Janice came back, and not just that, they became lovers. They were together for two years, but when Janice found out about Dion's condition, she left him, afraid that she might not have a happy ending with Dion. He tried to take her back and promised that he will fight for his life no matter what happens to spend a lifetime with her, but still, Janice chose to leave. She even moved from California to Chicago to stay away from him.

"The last update I had from her, she already has a boyfriend and is now happy with her new lover." he sadly mumbled.

So, that is the reason why he lost hope for living, why he lost hope for everything.

Janice was his only hope back then, but she left. And his world just collapse, for his hope—which is Janice, gave up first.

"Now, tell me, what else is the reason for me to live? Everyone gives up on me. Well, except for dad, but he is busy with the hospital and he doesn't have time for me. I also lost hope that someone is willing to love me despite my condition. Every girl nowadays wants assurance and a happy ending, which I can't give."

His voice is low and blue like a winter a sonata. I opened my mouth to say something but I just can't find the right words to say.

If only I knew what happened, that he already suffered enough because of his Brain Hemorrhage, and lost the people he cherishes the most, if I only knew, I wouldn't have asked. But, it happened already.

My next words were unexpected, even I does not know where I get them. It suddenly slips out of my mouth.

"Dion?"

"Hmm?"

"I can be your best friend."

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