HadleyMy nerves are shot, completely and totally raw and jagged. I haven't been this nervous in years, probably not since the day I walked down the aisle and joined my life with another person. And we all know how that turned out. My GPS flashes the five-minute warning at me. I'm really close to Trick's shop.I haven't been paying much attention since I turned onto the maze of downtown streets, but quickly I realize I'm in a much more blue-collar neighborhood. Things are well taken care of but there's still a tarnish of age and use on them that comes with doing manual labor. Glancing down at the GPS, I check the number and commit it to memory. Buildings are so close together here it's going to be easy for me to pass it if I'm not paying attention. I'm not entirely sure if I could get back here by myself again, and pulling over to start the GPS again is a no-go for me. Slowing to a crawl, I gaze into my rearview mirror, glad no one's behind me and look for building 526. When
TrickHer face is bright red as she turns away from me, acting absolutely infatuated with the wrenches hanging on my wall. She has no fucking idea what they do, but it's so damn cute as she walks over and starts looking at the different sizes, I have to chuckle. This one is more skittish than a newborn foal, and I need to remember that. "So, do you wanna learn the basics?" I clear my throat, damned if I'm not hoarse. Verbal sparring has never affected me this way, but I do love to see her dark eyes light up. "Yup, teach me all your ways," she turns around, takes her purse off, and puts it on the workbench I have set up. I want to teach her every way I have, but I remind myself she isn't that kind of woman and this sure as hell isn't that kind of situation."All right, there's three things you absolutely need to know," I count off on my fingers. "How to check your oil and top it off, how to check your coolant and top it off, and how to change a tire.""Got it," she nods."
HadleyMy shoulders are tight and my eyes sting when I close them. My fingers curve into my palms as I resist the urge to rub them. I've been told it's the worst thing I can do, but God it feels so good. I need some of those liquid tears, or whatever, the eye doctor keeps telling me about. I'm pretty sure those things are made out of unicorn tears, though, because of how much my copay is for them. When they told me the price, I said forget it, but damn my eyes hurt. Maybe after the sale I'm having for Halloween I'll be able to afford them, but until then I'm stuck with pushing through. Story of my life for the past few years.Making the planner pages and the stickers all require me to be on the computer for a while. Add that to the time I'm on the computer at my day job and my eyes constantly hurt. Data entry is a freakin' bore, but it pays the majority of the bills right now. Maybe one day I'll be able to work from home full-time, but for right now, I'll have to remember to go
TrickEarly isn't something I strive to be for anything. It was never ingrained into me as a teenager, not even be on time for an appointment. It's a skill I learned once I'd already gotten in trouble and realized no one gave a shit if I were taught right from wrong as a child. The ones who taught me the concept of not making others wait on me was my first parole officer, the public defender who gave me the time of day, and the bosses who were willing to give me a shot, even when they probably shouldn't have.So for me to be here today, on a Saturday, fifteen minutes early for my meeting with Riley, is a feat in and of itself. It's cool this morning, the hot grip of summer is finally loosening, and I can see the trees around the local park are starting to turn. It's not quite cold enough to see your breath in the morning, but it was enough for me to put my jacket and a beanie on.Luckily, I was early enough to score a table that's been set up, not too far from the festivities. I
Hadley"I had fun with him today, Mom."I don't have to ask who Riley's talking about. She's done nothing but talk about Trick since we left the downtown carnival. He left an impression on her, and if I'm honest, he left one on me, too. Not many men are nice to other people's children, at least not in my experience, and he never once got irritated with her or lost his temper. And when I looked down and saw Riley with her hand in his, it took everything I had not to cry.Her dad never did that. I can't even recall the last time he held either one of our hands, and Trick probably has no idea what he's done. He put a smile on her face I haven't seen in so long, I almost forgot what it looked like. Walking around with him today, I finally felt like I wasn't alone. To put that feeling into words isn't possible. He gave us something back today – whether he knows it or not."I did, too," I admit. It's hard because he's supposed to be there for her, not me, but his presence is helping
TrickThis day has gone to hell in a handbasket. Like with the quickness of a gangbanger at a drive by shooting. I'm trying to leave to go meet Riley and Hadley when G shows up."What the fuck, Trick?" he screams as he hops out of someone's car. I'm not sure who he got to drive him, and frankly I don't care. Right now I don't have time to mess with him and his attitude. "I don't have time to mess with you right now, G. Come back tomorrow." "No, you son of a bitch, I wanna know why you took the starter off my bike. I can't get anywhere now."He runs up like he's going to get in my face, but I square my shoulders, making myself as big as I can. That backs him up real quick."Obviously you can get somewhere, because you're here, jawing in my face. As for the starter. You owe me for a job I did. You haven't paid, I took my property back. I warned you there were consequences to your actions."A look sweeps over G's face and it gives me a bit of pause. It's cold. "You're g
HadleyYou know when people tell you there are decisions in your life that have lasting repercussions? This is one of those decisions; I can feel the implications already weighing on my tired shoulders. Is what I'm doing right? Am I setting both myself and Riley up for a heartbreak that won't ever heal? I've done it once before, I can live through it again. But I wonder - can she? Glancing back in my rearview mirror, I see my daughter with a huge smile on her face. She's excited and looking forward to hanging out with Trick. I am too, and maybe that's the scariest part of this whole situation.I follow close behind, not only with my car, but with eyes, as I watch him navigate traffic. There's an air of authority about him. He doesn't slouch like some guys who ride motorcycles. He sits up tall, resting a hand on his thigh when we come to a stop light. His feet plant fully on the ground and there's a masculinity to the way he sits astride the seat; like he owns it. He could own me ju
TrickI want to know where Hadley went when I asked how she wanted her hamburger cooked. Her eyes had become unfocused, her breathing erratic, and the look on her face was one of anger, regret, and maybe a little disgust. One day she'll trust me enough to tell me. I'll make her trust me enough to tell me."It's done, ladies."A few months ago, I put a picnic table out here after I got sick of eating inside by myself. As I've cooked, Hadley has taken it upon herself to set the table, turning us into a team. It's nice to be a part of a team. I've never had that feeling before. Setting the burgers and hot dogs on the table, I watch as they come over from where they've been checking out the flowers the old owners of this place planted. They come over, and I pick Riley up since I'm unsure if she can comfortably navigate the table. With a hand to her back, I watch as she gets comfortable. "Want another?" I eye the almost empty Corona Hadley's set in front of her. "Better not. It'
TrickIf anyone had told me three years ago I would be where I am right now, I would've laughed, called them names, and probably punched them in the face. Now? I'm just thankful that I can call this woman who sits on my right my wife and the little girl who's going to come onstage very soon, my daughter. Giving my attention to the woman up front, I pay attention as she speaks."It's my privilege to introduce to you some of our students who have moved up an age bracket this year to the eight to twelve-year-old group. Many of them started with me when they were four, and I've been incredibly lucky to see them grow. They've become amazing pianists, every day I'm constantly amazed by what I learn from them, and what I witness them do. Up first for the eight to twelve-year-olds is Riley Tennyson."I'm not going to lie, every time I hear someone say her last name is Tennyson, it gets me in the chest. Not long after we were married, the adoption went through and we officially became a f
HadleyAlmost Three Years LaterI glance down at my phone, shifting in my seat as I cross my legs, and take a deep breath. Trick should have been here twenty minutes ago, and would have been if I wasn't so damn forgetful. He'll never forgive himself if he misses this, and it will be completely my fault. There's ten more minutes before the lights go down and the rest of the recital starts. Pursing my lips, I wonder if I should text him, but if he's driving, he won't answer the phone anyway. Not to mention for the past six months, I've already been a hell of a distraction. People are milling about, and I happen to be looking at the auditorium doors when they open and in steps my husband. I lift my hand up so he can see where I'm sitting, waving him over. "You made it," I smile over at him as he slides into the seat next to me, carrying the flowers I'd forgotten. "I was worried I wouldn't, traffic is crazy out there with it being close to Christmas and all. Did I miss her?"
HadleyI check the clock on my phone, before I turn back to my computer. I took the day off work to get caught up with my Etsy orders. If it keeps up the way it is, I'm going to be doing the Etsy thing full-time. Trick and I have been talking about it a lot lately. Trick and Riley should be here soon, I just hope he hasn't forgotten he had to go pick her up at school after he ran his errands.It's stupid I'm even thinking this way, because if there's one thing about Trick, it's that he'll never forget his Sprite. The thought warms my heart. Just as I pick up my phone to call him, I hear their footsteps on the stairs leading up to the apartment. Next month though, we'll have an inside entrance. The loan for the building next door went through, and we're working on expanding our apartment. I can't wait."Babe!""Mom!"I hear their voices as they come through the door. "I'm right here," I whisper from the kitchen table. Tux and I aren't a full ten feet from the door.They laug
TrickFive Months LaterNervous doesn't even begin to cover how I'm feeling right now. I've never checked Riley out of school, but today I'm doing it. "Just sign here, Mr. Tennyson," the secretary tells me, after they've checked my license against the sign out sheet for Riley. "She'll be here in a few minutes, if you wanna have a seat."It's been a long time since I've been in a school office. I glance around, layout still looks the same, even if everything else is a bit more technologically advanced. These chairs aren't made for someone with my height, and I check my cell phone, seeing how much longer I'm going to have to wait for Sprite. I adjust in the chair, right as the door opens, and in she walks."Trick!" She runs over to me, as I stand and grab her in my arms. We just saw each other this morning before Hadley took her to school, but Sprite and I, we have a bond. "Hey Sprite," I set her down, grabbing her hand. "You ready to blow this popsicle stand?"She giggle
Trick"Mom, are you sure it's okay for us to break tradition?" Riley asks, her eyes wide as she gazes at the Christmas tree box sitting in my apartment."What's normal tradition?" I ask, opening the box up with my knife.Hadley smiles at her daughter. "Normally we wait until December 10th, we put on A Christmas Story,and we decorate while watching the movie play over and over again." "It's only a few days before the tenth," I look at my phone. "Today's the fifth, and if you want to watch the movie, I'm sure it's on Netflix. Why don't you go look, Sprite."Riley scampers off to find the remote so she can check on the movie situation. "Thank you for this," Hadley leans in, circling her arms around my neck. Sitting down, it's easier for her to give me a hug while she stands over me."We've had a hell of a day. I can't think of anything better to top it off than what we're about to do right now. Besides," I turn so I can see her. "In all the years I've lived here, I've never
HadleyWe've been sitting in this mediation room for almost an hour, waiting for Phillip and his attorney to appear. The magistrate checks his watch. "We'll give them a few more minutes."I don't want to give them a few more minutes. They knew as well as we did, the time they were supposed to be here. This is completely typical of him. Expecting everyone to wait while he takes his time, doing whatever it is he feels is more important than what's right in front of him. I know without out a doubt, this is how he'll treat Riley if he gets custody of her. I hope it makes an impression on everyone sitting in the room.Just as we're about to get up to leave, the door opens and in walks my ex-husband. He's aged years since the last time I saw him, he looks weak and maybe a little frail. For a few seconds I wonder if he's sick, and the reason he wants to have contact with Riley now is because he's dying. Then I realize men like him don't die slowly. They go out in a blaze of glory, shock
TrickI know exactly what Hadley wants and I feel like a son of a bitch because I'm going to give it to her. In a way, it feels like I'm using her, because I'll be getting pleasure out of what we're about to do too, but I can't deny her. She's hurting, I'm hurting, and if we can make each other feel better, why shouldn't we?Taking the towel completely off, I push the covers back, revealing her body to me. She's wearing a tank top and a pair of shorts. "Take the shorts off," I whisper, lifting the tank top over her head.Tonight, I'm not feeling that crazy rush I usually feel with her. I'm almost lazy in my perusal of her body, not anxious to move this along. I watch as she kicks the shorts down her legs, pushing them off the edge of the bed. She lays naked before me and I realize how lucky I am that she chose me. Hadley had her pick of any man if she'd just allowed herself to put her guard down, and I'm the one who got lucky enough to be let in."Let me take your mind off ever
Hadley"I'm honestly not worried about Patrick's past," Sally mumbles as she looks over the paperwork I received. "It's more about someone's character in these cases than what they did to get them in the situations they were in, and from what I can tell you had pretty reliable character witnesses at your last hearing," she gives Trick a glance. "I'm going to need them all to write a statement. The more character witnesses I can get, the better off for the case. I truly think he's posturing, but we won't know for sure until we get before the magistrate.""My probation officer, and I'm sure the director of the Companion Program would vouch if I needed her to," he grips my hand tighter."You're a business owner?" She asks as she makes some notes in her computer. "Do you own the building?""I am, and I do, outright. I made the last payment three months ago. I'm looking into buying the building next to it," he admits, and I glance over, my mouth agape. "I have a meeting with the ban
TrickI listen as Hadley explains what's happened to the woman on the other end of the phone. As I hear her words, feel the tension in her body, and see the emotions across her face, I get angrier. I wonder how in a time where I'm the happiest I've ever been, I'm also more scared than I've ever been. The emotions switched in the blink of an eye to polar opposites. There's a gnawing in my gut that's forcing me to look at myself and realize a few major truths. Hadley would be better off without me; she could fight this easier if I weren't in her corner. I have to give her the out she needs if she wants it, even though I told her I'd be here no matter what. I don't want to be the reason she loses her child. There's no way I could live with myself or face Riley's sweet face if I were the cause of such pain. When she gets off the phone, her face is red, but she seems more together."We need to head to her office; she's going to file a motion for discovery. She wants to know why, a