Missing Him

~Nikki~

It’s been days since I’ve seen Paul, and my heart has been hurting since. I miss him, and that sounds so crazy to me. We weren’t together; I mean, we didn’t have a relationship. We didn’t go out on dates, and we didn’t have that togetherness, but I felt we melded together in a very short time.

There’s a connection with Paul that I can’t explain; it literally doesn’t make any sense. I can feel this bond with him and feel like our bond is lost. It isn’t a broken bond, but it’s definitely not on the surface like it was before. I wish I could turn back the hands of time and not indulge in a relationship with Paul at all.

At the time, indulging with Paul was innocent and fun. Now, it hurts; it hurts so badly. I want him to be happy; I want him to have everything. The problem is that, somewhere down the line, I decided, subconsciously, that I wanted him to have all of that with me. I wanted to be the one to make him happy and to see him smile each day. I genuinely believe I was sta