Saturday, 15 February 2014
6:15PM
Dear Jennifer,
I am seated in the backyard of my house as I make this entry into my journal. The orange flickers of the sinking sun falls on the round wooden table in front of me leaving a lustrous surface that seems hard to stop staring at. It reminds me of the first time I met Georgie back in Asembo when I came to visit you after completing my high school studies.
I remember that it was evening and you had sent me to Akado Market to buy some fish for supper. I passed by a posho mill where a group of thuggish-looking boys stood by chatting merrily. One of them who appeared distinctively tall, mascular and black, came out of the group and barricaded my way. I tried to find my way off but he incessantly kept blocking all sides of the path. When I stopped right in front of him and cast my piercing looks onto his face, he asked rather politely in English, "I'm sorry, miss, but could you please spare me a moment of your time." His voice was deep and soft. " I replied rudely, "No. Get out of my way."
"Please," he insisted.
"I already said no."
"Well, I won't refuse to let you go. I am George from Seme, and those boys are my friends. I only wanted to say... er... I'm taken in by your beauty."
Taken in? Did that mean anything like 'I love you' or 'I need you'? I wondered, looking past him into the group of boys that seemed to be reading our reactions from the corner of their eyes. Maybe he had decided to choose his verb phrase carefully to make a hit out of the ballpark, I thought now looking back at him.
"Come on...," he begged and smiled at me gaily, dimples rippling on his cheeks like harmless ocean tides, such a winsome smile. I would not even look at him again in the eye. I turned to the ground and went as if to begin drawing something with my toes but stopped when it occurred to me that I would look antidiluvian. I looked sideway. I was already in love, and every passing moment seemed to be delaying our mutual destiny.
"Thanks. Let me go now, please, will you?" I said and moved past him without even waiting for a response.
That night, dear sister, I could not sleep. Geogie's image, his lovely gait and lovesome smile, stood erect in my mind like sweet morning sunrays hitting my face. I wanted to see him again and, perhaps, apologize for being fresh to him.
When we luckily met for the second time at the market, I gave my apology. "I am sorry for acting rudely towards you last time."
He replied, "No. I think I should apologise instead. Why would a stranger block your way and demand to speak with you over something that does not even make sense? I am sorry." I nodded, looking away. He went on, "Well, would you mind telling me your name?"
"Linda, or Lin if you like. And you said you're called George, right?"
"Yes. And wow, you have a clear memory. You can call me Georgie, that's what my friends like." I nodded. An awkward moment of silence fell between us, but he broke it off after a short while, "Do you mind us becoming friends, Lin?"
I laughed to break the ice and then replied, "Friends? We're already friends."
"No, I meant... er... close friends."
"How close?" I wanted him to be specific.
"Lovers."
"Oh... See, Georgie, I think you're going too fast. You don't even know where I come from, do you?"
"I think you come from around this place, Asembo to be specific."
"Which part of Asembo?"
"I don't know, maybe you tell me."
"See. That's why I'm saying you're going way too fast. I don't come from Asembo."
"Then what are you doing here in Akado?"
"And what are you either? Oh, I'm sorry in case that was rude. Well, I have to go now, Georgie. I hope we meet another day, probably in the morning so you can know me afresh."
"OK. Your phone number, please." He removed a button phone from his pants' pocket.
"I'm sorry, I don't have a phone yet. Bye." I walked past him and proceeded to the market.
When later I opened up to you about him, sister, you warned me to be careful in dealing with him, saying the days were evil. But our frequent meetings on market days blossomed into a love relationship, and finally into marriage months later. Now, I wish I had taken heed of your sentiments. After begetting him Tony five years later (do not forget I had multiple miscarriages before) and then Harriet, my husband turned aromantic towards me. His assumed sense of command and withdrawal from me and the upcoming impasse over a gold ring paint a clear picture of a man no longer interested in putting his house together for a clear future.
Yesternight he, indeed, came home, when everyone and everything else had fallen asleep, sweating and smelling like raw meat. And instead of taking a bath, he held me tightly and pulled me to the bedroom, without even saying hello, and demanded to exchange flesh with me. I felt tired and scared, my body itself not even tingling with sexual desires. But he siezed me and stripped me naked and told me to make myself ready in bed. He then undressed himself and spread out his foul-smelling body on me, put his dirty thing in me. I accepted my fate with an ungradable sense of abhorrence towards every piece of his action that night. His mouth seemed to have acted as a stench trap for dirty air emanating from his stomach and from wherever he was the whole day he went missing, and his innerpants smelled like a putrid heap of gabbage.
I spent the best part of my morning nursing my injured heart with tears.
Since he has been home all day long, I wanted to spare a moment of my time to speak with him over the gold ring, but fear took the best part of me. Besides, I was still feeling uneasy with him over the vicious act he did to me in the night. I am taking time to harness my emotions before probably opening up another duel with him.
He wanted to leave home some time in the afternoon, but he suddenly became restless, and kept moving between his restroom and our bedroom, not actually clear about his real intentions. Then one of his friends showed up and he has since been spending time with him in a shade in the front yard.
At least, Harriet was glad to have her best friend back.
Just before I go, dear, I was really taken aback by what Tony asked me today. He came to the kitchen where I was preparing them lunch and sat silent for a moment, holding his chin up into his right palm. I have never seen him deeply taken into thoughts like that before. So I decided to ask, "Tony is everything okay with you?" And he surprisingly replied, "You know I was going to ask you the same. By the way, Mama, is Baba treating you well?" I nodded and remained silent, not knowing what else to say.
***
Sunday, 16 February 201411:45PMDear Jennifer,My husband has not yet come back from a fundraiser he attended in the afternoon after church. Perhaps he decided to spend the rest of his day at our home back in the boondock. I wonder why he never keeps me updated on his whereabouts, not even after a holy mass in town and a stressful afternoon.Georgie loves the church, though I would lie, to be sincere, to say it has ever had any spiritual impact on him. We have never been part of a specific congregation since he began his political career. We just keep maundering about from one group of believers to another.So today being a worship day, he told me in the morning that we were going to attend sermon at a local church back in Seme. Thirty minutes later, he changed his mind that we would first attend sermon at a church in Nyamasaria, and then he would leave us to attend a fundraiser at the
Monday, 17 February 201411:00PM.Dear Jennifer,You taught me that no metal is too hard to bend. You also taught me that the weakness of a man lies in his ego. Today, dear sister, I proved your teachings right.My husband came back home a few minutes after I had sent the kids off to school. I perceived that he was jittery with me for spoiling his speech on Sunday, and I would not take any chances of apologizing for granted. So I prepared his bathwater and made him breakfast as usual. After he had bathed and sat down to eat in the dining section, I served him tea with tears cascading my cheeks uncontrollably. Then I sat down opposite him, still heaving with emotions and crying helplessly.When he saw my tears and figured out my depth of grief, his looks quickly turned pallid. At this point, I knew he was touched and had to say something. He looked away from me and asked, "What is i
Tuesday, 18 February 201411:15pm.Dear Jennifer,My husband told me this morning before he left for job that he would be leaving for a one-week benchmarking trip to China with his executive the following week.What is funny about this trip is not the period it will take but the nitty-gritties of the benchmarking. I did not want to sound so snoopy, but I was tempted to ask how a small county in a developing country could benchmark with a developed country of the likes of China. I mean, what is even common between the two geographical units. Or perhaps my education inadequacy denies me a better understanding of economic concepts and development methods.That aside, I am still scrutinising the pieces of advice you gave me on phone in the course of the day. I wanted to know how to handle my husbands secretive and absolutist nature, and you told me three things.First,
Wednesday, 19 February 201411:30PM.Dear Jennifer,I am shocked by the latest developments regarding the strange gold ring. Just when I thought life would return to normal, something really fremd just occured.See, my husband left for work in the morning as usual, and I guess he took along with him his ring, 'cause it was nowhere to be found in his coats' pockets or trousers or anywhere in the house.At lunchtime, however, while lower primary school kids returned home from school, my Harriet came back with something in her palm."Mama, know what I have found?" she shouted happily and playfully."What is it, my baby?" I asked."Promise you won't snatch it away from me," she demanded."Um... Well, I promise. What is it?" I replied with a full deck of curiosity."A gold ring!" she exclaimed, stretching out her r
Thursday, 20 February 201410:53PM.Dear Jennifer,I woke up to some sad news today. Edith Alison, one of the two nurses who attended to me at Moderncare Private Hospital, has passed on. Her body was found dumped in a bush at Manyatta Estate. Her counterpart, Faith Earnington, who was with her at the time they left the hospital has written a statement at the police station in Manyatta.I called her to pass my condolences when I heard the sad news on radio in the morning. She told me that a gang attacked them yesterday evening, barely two kilometres from the hospital, and kidnapped Edith. They live on the same plot here in Milimani Estate and had boarded the same motorcycle home when they were attacked. She said her phone had died down, thus she could not call the police. But she went to the nearest police station and reported. The cops tried to locate the gang on their devices in vain. It seemed they had
Friday, 21 February 201411:03PM.Dear Jennifer,It has been another unusual day for me. I could not sit back and watch my marriage stoop on the precipice of failure, owing to a strange gold ring. My husband, the Georgie I knew, who was full of wisdom and love, is no longer the one I see. The one I see wanders back to the house from work, cold and shifty and unwilling to protect his marriage.So today I took a private walk outside our street to see a pastor I was well-acquainted with at Kona-kayona Estate. Since it rained heavily in the morning, I knew the area would be filled with trenches of dirty water and so I wore my gamboots and put on my cardigan and a pair of gloves to keep warm. I also wore a bucket hat to conceal my face a bit since I w
Saturday, 22 February 201410:58PM.Dear Jeniffer,I was disturbed by a few things and had to pay Faith a visit today. Saturday is her day off at Moderncare and so it was opportune for a visit. Since I did not want Georgie to know that I was visiting the nurse, I waited till he had left the house, then I threw myself into a pair of palazzo pants, a chiffon blouse, wedge heels and a pair of glasses, took my handbag and left. I walked down the street and straight to the plot where she lives.I found her seated in her portico preparing some beans for cooking. She welcomed me into the house and served me tea. We spoke about our families (she is engaged to an Indian) and what happened before I fainted the previous Sunday. But when I finally touched on Edith's demise, she turned bleak and somewhat shaken."Well, I'm sorry I brought up this conversation," I tried to rub it off.
Sunday, 23 February 201411:02PM.Dear Jennifer,When I woke up in the morning today, I found Georgie lying beside me in bed, fast asleep. I stood up and walked stealthily to the living room, then to his meditation room, trying to see if there was any scruffy sign of Tiger. The two rooms were lonely and quiet. I walked to the kids bedroom and found them still asleep. I left as calm as I had gone in; I did not want to wake them up so early on a Sunday.When I returned to my bedroom, I found Georgie awake; in fact, surfing the Internet on his smartphone."Good morning, my lord," I greeted."Morning, dear," he replied in a calm croaky voice, unminding my presence. I moved closer and sat next to him on the bed.
Wednesday, 5th March 201411:15PMDear Jennifer,The police came to my house in the morning. They said they wanted to ask me a few questions about the man Tiger. But I told them I was not ready for an interrogation about anything. One of them insisted that it was important that I told them what I knew about Tiger for my own safety. He went ahead and asked me whether and how many times the man has been at my house."If there's anything you want to know about him, I think the best person to ask would be my husband," I replied. "Not that they do interact, but he is the head of this family and is answerable to anything.""Well that depends on whether you want him arrested or not," said one of the two male cops."Arrested!" I exclaimed. "Um... okay... whatever it is, get your batts outa here! Please." I was irritated. Did they think they would put me down with a threat? No, I
Tuesday, 4 March 201411:00PMDear Jennifer,After my husband left in the morning, I cleaned the house and went about washing his clothes. Later, I went out to see Faith and settle the dispute that was rising between us. I used a motorcycle.I found her seated at the porch of her house. At first, I thought she would be flared at me, but to my surprise, she amplected and welcomed me into her house.I felt suspicious. When she served me tea, I hesitated taking it. "Faith, why are you doing this? I was hoping to find you still vexed up with me the way you were when you appeared at my gate? Why are you now good and kind to me?""What, Your Excellence? What are you talking about?" she asked, completely taken aback."No. Please don't play false modesty, darling. You did show up at my gate and said my husband accosted you!"
Tuesday, 4th March 20148:45AMDear Jennifer,(Alert: This entry contains some amorous discriptions. However, care has been taken to avoid elements of offensive romantic candour)Georgie returned home at 2:00am today. I had already slept when he returned, and since we do not yet have another gatekeeper, he had to call me to open the gate. I have been trying to contact the gatekeeper since he last disappeared, but he does not answer my calls. He has decided to take the studs on his job. Maybe he is fed up with Tiger's threats or something unimaginable happened to him on the morning Tiger appeared at my porch. I am yet to investigate.When Georgie came into the house, I decided to take the wheels over our marriage muteness. I could feel that he was randy from the way he kept touching my breasts, and I badly wanted him too. But he was smelling horrible; the yucky freakish mixture of sweat and gri
Monday, 3 February 201411:03MP.Dear Jennifer,Georgie has not returned home since yesterday and I am beginning to think something might be wrong, considering how he left yesterday, acerbic and disintegrated in family matters. Really, where would he be in the middle of this fracas? If he does not take great care, then he might as well be a target for the cops, given his high profile connections with Tiger. Information has also reached me that he went out to frighten someone. Why would he do that on someone who has entrusted me with their life?I went out to buy the Bible from a bookshop. If it could be a protection against Tiger and his mischiefs, then it was nothing to give a flying puck. Sincerely speaking, dear sister, I am wearied and scared of seeing the mystical Tiger's face every day and listening to his threats and mockeries. Where the hell did my marriage start rolling downhill?
Sunday, 2nd March 201411:00PMDear Jennifer,I thought Georgie would be back so I could find time with him to solve this impasse around Tiger, but he has not yet appeared. Faith called to say that the police have been looking for Tiger since the attack occurred.When I left Moderncare without answers, I took a motorbike ride to Star Mortuary where I heard most of the bodies were being transmitted. As I headed into the building, however, someone called my number. I took out the phone and checked; it was a landline number. I decided to pick up the call.“Hello… who’s calling, please?” I inquired.“Am I speaking to Mrs Linda Argwins?” asked a slim feminine voice.“Yes, you are. And who are you, please?” I replied.“Please come to Port Victoria Private
Sunday, 2nd March 2014,6:15PMDear Jennifer,GEORGIE returned home today. The kids – especially Harriet – were so delighted to see him back as safe as he had left. But I was on something else. I noticed that he was putting on the gold ring, and a strong repugnance against it suddenly struck my heart. As I hugged him, I felt something pushing me to hold his finger and pull off the ring, but I kept my knickers on.“Baba, Tiger came here and threatened me. He said he was going to be my father.” It was Harriet who opened up the conversation about Tiger when Georgie had already sat down in the house. I had not even thought about the approach to take in handling the gridlock. Georgie turned up his eyebrows and cast onto me looks that seemed to beg the question “did you tell the kids about him”? I nodded, as if I had read and understood the facial expression, and remaine
Saturday, 1st March 20146: 00PM.Dear Jennifer,Today was the day I felt like I was just entering a new world of things. When I opened Tiger’s notebook in the morning after having breakfast, I came across an order of writing I have never seen in my life. The title and subtitles of each page were written in meaningful English words, but the content consisted of a crazy jostle of the English alphabet and figures and another foreign alphabet I could not quite apprehend.The first page was titled “The burning ritual”. I strained my eyes through the content trying to see whether I could gather anything, but it all looked like computer-coded writing. I was just about to flip to the next page when I heard a knock at my bedroom’s door. I tossed the book under my pillow and went to the door. When I opened it, I met the grim looks of my little Harriet.“Baby, I told you not to come in. Have you fi
Friday, 28th February 201410:00PM.Dear Jennifer,Faith’s case was mentioned today and she was released on a five hundred thousand shillings cash bail (which I paid from my family’s account), and so I decided to pay her a visit for a small talk. My lawyer told me that she was a bit closed up about giving details and that I needed to find time with her and explain to her the importance of opening up for a court case.I found her watching news in her house - she looked weary and troubled. She welcomed me with a firm hug and great appreciation about my intervention in her case. After she had served me tea, I decided to start up the conversation.“Faith, my lawyer says you are hard on giving information,” I started, and poured some water to cool the bath, “You’re the like of my husband who clamps onto information like a kangaroo onto its child. Georgie has never been easy on opening up about anything,
Thursday, 27 February 20146:00PMDear Jennifer,There is quite a lot happening with this man Tiger that I feel like I'm living in fantasy. When I woke up today, I found him calmly seated on a chair at the porch. Just ima... I could not even believe it myself. It was about 6:00AM and I had woken up as usual to prepare the kids for school when I caught the choking smell of cigar smoke. When I opened the main door to see who it was, for I thought it could be the gatekeeper due to his smoking habit, to my consternation, I found Tiger instead, seated untouched, smoking weed!I was stupefied and almost fainted, dear. Tiger himself was not even tingled a bit. He did not even turn himself to look at me."Holy shit! You scared me to death, you tosspot!" I indicated my frustration after regaining strength. He did not respond. "What are you doing at my porch this early, Tiger?"