The thought hits me out of nowhere. I knew I liked him. Really, really liked him. It just never occurred to me until now that I love him. But I do. I love him with everything in me."Hey," he says cupping my cheek. "You okay?""Yeah." I shake my head of these new thoughts, not ready to confess my feelings at this point. "Sorry. My thoughts just ran wild for a second."He kisses the top of my head and we make our way into the apartment."Hey, Rookie!" Christian yells as he walks his way towards us, stopping to give Rowen a fist bump and me a hug. We've seen him a few times during the off-season and I know he and Rowen have become friends."How was the trip to Hawaii, man?" Rowen asks.Christian holds a hand over his heart. "It was fucking beautiful. Amazing. Probably the most romantic place I've ever been and I'm not a romantic guy.""I don't believe that," I chide. "I bet you're romantic with the right person.""I was treating my mama to this trip to Hawaii. That's not the time for rom
I watch Tiffany from across the room while I nurse my beer. A smile lights up her face as she chats with one of the newest players, a rookie who just came to us from Tulsa. Darren something-or-other. No doubt they're talking shop. She always looks happy when she's talking sports. She's so damn beautiful. And of all the guys she could have chosen, she chose me. Unbelievable.She hasn't made eye contact with me since the incident with Mack. I knew she would turn him down. At least, I really hoped she would. But I can't figure out how I ended up being the bad guy in that exchange."What are you doing over here while your woman is over there?" Daniel sits down next to me, slapping me on the back in greeting."Hey. What are you doing here? Quincy let you out of the house?""She's having a girls' night with Geni or something. Besides, I always come to the first party of the year.""Really?"He shrugs. "Just to make a showing. Team unity and all that shit." I nod and suck in my beer some more
I wind my way around the stadium, watching the signs as I go. I'm so used to sitting in Section 100 that I've never been to this area before. Even after four seasons of games.It takes me a few minutes to find it, but finally I'm pushing through the door of the box reserved for the wives and girlfriends, more commonly known as WAGs.When Rowen suggested sitting here, I had to really think about it. I like sitting close to the field. But since we're in the middle of the last cold snap of the year, I decided it was a good time to check it out. There are a dozen or so people standing around, chatting. Most of them I don't recognize, but I assume they are family members. Especially the kids. What looks like a fully stocked bar is off to my right, the bartender busy wiping down the counter. Against the wall there is a long buffet table set up, just waiting for food to be brought in. With it being an evening game, I'm assuming dinner will be provided later.As the door clicks shut behind m
I hear the commotion as people surround us and feel my head ricochet back when her fist connects with my mouth. Immediately my hands are on my mouth and I taste the blood on my tongue.Within seconds, she's being ripped off of me. Her legs are flailing and she's screaming for the man to put her down. And she's holding a chunk of my hair."Let me go! She's a fucking whore and she doesn't deserve to be here! Let me fucking go!"Quincy is almost immediately by my side. She puts her arm around me and leads me to the door. "Come on. Joe! Take us to the training room. You know where it's at?""Yes, ma'am," the bartender says and opens the door, stepping out in the hallway with us following behind him. There's blood all over my hands and my head feels like it's been pounded with nails. We walk about a hundred yards before security joins us and leads us the rest of the way around a maze of hallways. We end up in a brightly lit room where three or four guys in Mutiny staff uniforms are loungin
Rowen stalks over to me, cleats tapping the floor as he walks. He takes my face gently in his hands and looks me over from head to toe."It's worse than it looks," I say holding onto his forearms. "It's a lot of blood for a split lip.""And be careful of her head," Quincy says as Rowen goes to pull me closer. He draws back at her words and looks at me again, noticing the state of my hair for the first time. "She had a good chunk ripped out of the back. It's not bleeding anymore.""Fuuuck," I hear off to the side and look over to see Daniel watching the scene unfold before him. He looks at Quincy and raises his eyebrows."Jessica," she says to him. He sighs and squeezes the bridge of his nose. "Okay." That's all he says before turning around and walking away."Jessica Funderling?" Rowen asks Quincy. She nods and crosses her arms before looking at the floor. He looks back at me with a look of concern like I've never seen before. "Does it hurt bad?"I shrug. "A little. But not as much as
Tiffany was basically fine. I knew that when I took her home that night but I think I was a little shaken up by seeing her bloodied up. If it had been a man that had lifted a fist to her, I would have tracked him down and given him a taste of his own medicine. But being that it was another woman, well, the only thing I could do was take care of Tiffany.Nate and I had words, first, though. He was pretty pissed when he found out his wife had gotten smashed at a game and acted like that. But that didn't keep him from running his mouth off at me. He vowed to make my life hell if I ever got in his face again, to which I rolled my eyes and walked away. Telling him to get his wife's behavior under control was hardly stepping out of line, especially when someone else was injured by her actions. Not to mention, the owners don't like it when people close to the organization draw unnecessary press to the team.After Daniel found out what had happened, he went straight to Coach and warned him bef
He paces around the room, hands on his hips, still covered in sweat and filth from practice. He keeps running his hands through his hair before finally clasping them together and resting them on the top of his head. He keeps fidgeting as he walks."Do ye know what that's like?" he finally says. "Standing in the locker room in the middle of all my teammates. Teammates who have all fucked my girlfriend?"I reel back like I've been slapped. I knew he was upset when I let him in. Just the fact that he was still in his practice clothes was an indicator he had left early for some reason. But I never imagined it had anything to do with me. And I never, ever imagined this topic would be coming up again. He's been the first one to say my past didn't matter. He was the one who said it made me who I am and he liked who I am. Apparently he lied."They've all seen the freckle on yer nipple. They all know what ye smell like and taste like and what ye look like when you come." My face feels like it's
I fucked up. I fucked up so bad.I told her she was worth more than that. That she wasn't just an object for someone's pleasure. That she was letting herself be disrespected. And then I treated her like a groupie whore.And I hate myself for it."What are you still doing out here, Rookie?"I look over at the sound of Daniel's voice. He and Christian are headed my direction. Everyone else went straight to the locker room after practice except me. I decided to stay and do some drills for my cross kick. It's not bad, but it's not as good as I want it to be. Plus, I have this whole mess with Tiffany on my mind so I have energy to burn right now. And I definitely don't want to be in close quarters with Shivel."Just doing a little extra practice," I say as I flip the ball up with my toe and catch it as they get closer."Three hours of drills and scrimmage wasn't enough for you?"I shrug. "I'm still keyed up. Might as well take advantage of it."Daniel squints at me, like he's assessing me.
The snick of the lock unlatching when I wave my key fob in front of the door is the first real sign that life is going back to normal. Well, as normal as life can be after a new little human has come into the world. But as I step through the door and into the newsroom, I realize nothing has changed. The scanners are still squawking. Reporters are still making calls and typing. Televisions still glow with every local station and CNN ready to be monitored. The only difference is the person at the assignment desk."Hi Tom," I greet as I grab a huge stack of mail I'll need to sort through upstairs. There's too much to go through down here."Tiffany." He tips his head at me and goes back to his business. Tom took over for Caleb when he moved upstairs. He's a little older than everyone else in the newsroom. His hair and neatly trimmed beard are almost gray. He's pleasant enough, just sticks to himself. We definitely don't have the same kind of rapport Caleb and I use to have.That also mean
Rowen makes sure we're all settled before kissing me on the top of the head and throwing on his sweats. "What do you want to eat? My mam brought bangers and mash.""I'll leave that for you," I joke, knowing it's his favorite. "But do we still have any of that grilled chicken salad? I don't know why but it sounds really good.""Yep. I'll go grab it for you."The last three months have been an adjustment, but overall, it's gone really well. Cace is a great baby, but I didn't expect anything less with him being Rowen's child. Well, that's not exactly true. A part of me always remembered Ryan is his grandfather, so I know there's some ornery in there waiting to come out. But for the most part, he's very docile. Cries when he's hungry, fusses when he's wet, but otherwise even-tempered. And my in-laws have been wonderful. Sure, the men argue all the time about the safest way to hold the baby or the best cleaning products. Denise and I just laugh at the ridiculousness and let them hash it ou
"Keep doing that," I moan, grabbing Rowen's hair and pulling him closer to my core. His tongue still does magical things to my lady parts and today, he's going to town. Licking, nipping, and sucking as he inserts two fingers inside me, hitting just the right spot. "Oh, that's it. Right there… ohgod…"My orgasm hits me fast and hard, just the way I like it these days. He continues to suck on my clit as the waves overtake me, riding me to that sated feeling I love. But he's not done yet.As soon as I've come back down to earth, he kisses up my body, paying special attention to the scar that now mars my abdomen. When I look at my stomach, I see flabby skin that hasn't tightened up yet and a knife wound. But Rowen tells me it's beautiful. That it's a reminder of the sacrifice I made to give him the best gift he's ever received - our son. Coming from anyone else, I'd say they were full of shit. But coming from Rowen, I know he means every word. Because of it, I still feel beautiful. It al
"I know you'll be here when you can, Mom," I say through FaceTime on my phone. "Really, all we're going to do for the next few weeks is sleep and eat anyway. Maybe bathe."Stroking the top of my son's head, I watch as he suckles on my breast. Yes, the dull pain of breastfeeding is there, but that doesn't take away the surreal feeling of being a new mom. It's amazing."I know." My mom sighs. "I'm just mad at myself. Of all the times to fall down some steps and break an ankle, this is the worst."I giggle lightly. "I still can't believe you did it at the gym.""And right after my kickboxing class too! I had just shown everyone what a badass I am, and three steps took me out.""Any muggers with ill intentions better beware of running into you in a back alley. Unless there are stairs involved." "Well, hopefully in the next few weeks, the doctor will clear me for travel. Then I'll be on the first plane there.""Sounds good to me." Baby Cace squeaks and pulls away from my breast, nuzzling h
The thoughts are overwhelming. I've never been this happy in my life, and I've only seen him for a split second. Lifting my head, I look around trying to catch another glimpse. Apparently, I'm not as subtle as I think I am."Would you like to see your son? You can go over there."Nodding, I stand up and follow the person over to a small table where my son is lying down, clearly unhappy by being poked and prodded. I don't blame him. I wouldn't like if all my glory was on display in front of these strangers either."Can I… can I touch him?" I ask tentatively, not sure what I'm allowed to do right now."Absolutely," the person says. "And talk to him. Babies like familiar voices."Slowly, I get closer, still in awe that I'm looking at my son. My son. It feels like I'm walking through a dream. Reaching down, I touch his tiny hand which immediately stretches and grabs my finger. The contact makes me suck in a breath. He's real. This is real. It's not a dream at all."Hello there, mo mhac. I'
I have dreamed about this day for months. Thought about every scenario on how it could happen. Planned for any situation. Prepared myself in every possible way.Except this one.Not one part of me anticipated I'd be standing in the hallway of the hospital wearing drab green scrubs with a matching surgical cap, waiting to join my wife in an operating room. And yet here I am, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't more nervous than I've ever been in my life.It's not just the operation. Yes, that is my immediate concern. As much as I like Dr. Hermann, he's getting ready to cut Tiffany open and pull our son out through a gaping wound. I'm sure there's more to it than that, but it basically boils down to that, and it's scary. What if he cuts the wrong part and he can't stop the bleeding? What if he accidentally cuts my child? What if she gets a major infection? The horrific possibilities are terrifying.Taking a breath to refocus my thoughts, I try to remember all the positives. Tiffany won't
I can practically feel his surprise when he shifts, situating us face-to-face. Thankfully, my doctor and my father-in-law have started chatting again, so Rowen and I can have some privacy. "Tiffany, this is just a change in the play. You of all people know how easily it can happen. I know this isn't soccer, but it's not that different. We go into every match with a plan, but sometimes it doesn't go like we expected. There's an injury or a new goalie." I smirk at his reference to the issues the team had early in the season. "The objective is always the same, but how we get there doesn't matter as long as we do. It's the same thing here. It doesn't matter how he gets here as much as it matters that it happens safely for both of you."I sniff again, but my tears have all but dried up. "We've been deflected."He nods and smiles at me. "Exactly. It's a change of play. But in the end, when we're holding him and taking care of him, we'll forget about everything except that we won."I chuckle
A low murmuring pulls me from sleep. I know it's only been a couple hours, but I feel so much better than I did. Damn that epidural for being as amazing as everyone said it would be.Peeling my eyes open, I roll slightly onto my back to see Dr. Hermann and Ryan chatting like old friends. A few seconds of eavesdropping and I finally catch the source of their newfound connection - Ireland. Apparently, Dr. Hermann spent a summer backpacking through Europe and caught a couple games when Ryan was in his prime and playing in front of his hometown fans. I'm sure the tales are tall right now, but at least their relaxed chatter means nothing wrong is happening on my side of the room.Glancing around, I finally catch sight of my husband who is sleeping soundly. I'm glad to see him getting some rest. He's been trying so hard to be strong for me. It's not gone unnoticed. But at last count he'd been awake for thirty hours. It was wearing on him."Ah, iníon sa dlí, yer awake."Ryan steps toward me a
Another eight hours. Another one centimeter dilated. Almost. I may be rounding up out of my own feeling of desperation. This entire experience is not at all like I expected. Not that I knew what was supposed to happen. Sure, we'd taken a birthing class one Saturday, but that was months ago when our schedules allowed us both to be there. And it never told us what would happen if Tiffany's body refused to do what it should. At least Tiffany's sleeping now. About four hours after the Pitocin began, she started crying, saying she couldn't do it anymore. She'd been awake for almost twenty-four hours and had been in some form of labor for over half of it. Plus, once the drugs kicked in, her contractions went from being painful to downright excruciating. It didn't take much convincing for her to finally decide to have the epidural. But it did take my Mam physically moving me out of the way to help her through all her fears - fear of a needle in her spine, fear of the drugs hurting the baby,