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Chapter Four Distance
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Axons POV
I'm glad I agreed to go on a blind date with Tatianna. Aiden was right; she's just what I needed to get my mind off of Becca. She must have thought I was a desperate fool. How was I supposed to know she was my blind date? I had felt bad that I knocked her down, and I needed a woman's perspective.It's been a long time since I've been on the prowl. Becca made sure of that. She was breathtaking, from her beautiful blonde hair to her sexy long legs. Some days I miss her, I miss us, but a part of me knew we wouldn't last. I gave her my best, but my best wasn't good enough. I know I shouldn't be thinking about her; a year is plenty enough time to get over her, but I can't. I don't understand how my love for her wasn't enough to keep her clean.
She had her choice, and I've made mine. It's time I move on and stop living in the past. I miss her laugh, and I miss her smile. I miss her morning kisses, and the delectable shade of red her cheeks turned when I kissed her neck. God, I miss her.
Maybe I should stay away from Tatianna. I don't want to screw her up as I did, Becca. I don't want to go through heartbreak. Every time she would come home high as a kite and say she was okay. She would tell me it was the last time. I think the longest she stayed sober was a month. She had her demons, and I had mine. It just got to the point where I couldn't handle her anymore.
I gave up on her when I promised to love her in sickness and in health. I don't deserve love. I don't deserve Tianna or anyone for that matter. I remember that night; God do I remember that night. It was the last time I saw those gorgeous green eyes. The last time I saw her earth-shattering smile. I held her so close to me. I knew we weren't perfect; I knew she would be gone by morning to get her next fix: my heart and my wallet.
I tried to get her into rehab, but when her parents died, she just lost it. First her brother than her parents I wasn't enough for her. She was on the path of destruction, and I was the only thing genuinely stopping her. When I gave up, she gave up.
I found her in the bathroom slumped over the toilet, eyes rolled back and cold. I just kept praying she would be okay, that we would be okay. I knew it was over. I knew it would be our last kiss. Something just told me that night, but I wouldn't listen.
Now she's gone; she was my star, my light in the darkness. When things were good, God was they good. When things were bad, it was hell.
I pour a glass of scotch to numb pain. Being with Tatianna tonight was great, but it only numbs the pain for a little while. I know Becca would want me to be happy.
By my fifth glass of scotch, I feel nothing. My vision is blurry; I feel numb. The pain is gone. I can't remember why I'm sad. I walk to the mirror to look at myself and can't even recognize the face staring back. He's a red-eyed monster. He has no feelings; all he feels is rage. I punch the mirror to block out the image, and it shatters, shatters like my heart. I know tomorrow I'll be expected to be Mr. Axon Blaze, Mr. Big Shot, but tonight I'm just broken and scared.
I've been doing so good lately, but I guess my demons have come to haunt me. I'll never be enough. Since Becca has left me, I'm a shell of who I used to be. I may put on a good front. Flirt with the ladies and smile. Coming from me, it isn't genuine, and I'm not real. I'm an image. Everything is falling around me, and I'm tearing apart at the seams. Tears fill my eyes. The alcohol can only numb so much.
I need to get out of here. I can still see Becca, I see her in my bed, I see her in the kitchen making breakfast wearing my shirt. I can't even go to the bathroom. I've even tried to remodel it, but she's still there. She's still here, but I can't touch her, I can't hold her, and it's killing me.
I've stayed here for her, but now I think I need to leave. I've been putting this off for way too long; I need to do it. I need to leave Ohio behind and move to LA. As much as I'd love to try a relationship with Tatianna, she deserves better. The only way to break free is to leave.
Leave my past behind and pray it doesn't find me. The alcohol only numbs it; I need to forget it. The only way that's going to happen is a new start. I pick up my phone; It's two in the morning. I'm sure my assistant will think I've completely lost it.
"Good evening, Mr. Blaze," she says with a sleepy yawn.
"Sarah, I need you to call in a replacement for my Ohio office. I'm coming to LA. Something has come up, and I can no longer be here. I have my private jet fired up at once. I'm leaving tonight."
"Right away, sir. I'll have your flight cleared, and I'll see you here first thing tomorrow. Good night sir."
"Good night Sarah, sorry to bother you."
I hang up my phone and don't bother to pack. I go down to my private parking garage, my limo waiting for me. I need to get the hell out of Ohio.
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Looking down at the phone, it beeps, signaling I have one new voice mail. My hands tremble as I pick it up. I ignored the call, knowing full well who the caller was. Truthfully I wasn't ready to face the aftermath just yet. I take a moment and debating if I should listen to the voicemail, I finally decide to click the green call button. His voice plays through my phone speaker, and the pit of my stomach drops. He knows; I can tell just by the sound of his voice. I can only imagine what the tabloids have printed about me now. I pull out my laptop and search the web for the latest scandals, and I can't believe my eyes. How the paparazzi got this picture is beyond me. It's of Axon and me kissing at his front door. A million thoughts start running through my mind. How will I even begin to make this situation work? I hate the paparazzi. I guess it's time I tell Axonthe truth. I pick up my phon
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I pull up to the dimly lit brick building an hour later. Three Black SUVs are already there. Meaning I’m late.Running my hands through my hair, I take a batted breath. This is it. The men are waiting. We could end this. It’s all on how we play the game. My hand reaches for the door, I know I’m taking my time, but the thought of telling the Don the news has me stalling. Even though he is Tati’s father, he is still a stone cold killer. Although he is older and wrinkles cover his face, he has seen more blood than a blood bank. And his withered hands have held more life in them than most. He doesn’t take bad news well. The fact that it was one of my men that put the family at risk, has me worried. I enter the solid concrete room where Vito is waiting patiently with his hands behind his back. Two men are strategically placed on both sides of him. “Bendetto, my boy!” Vito walks over to me and pats me on the back. His eyes are bright. I let out a breath that I didn’t realize I
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Marco and I have finally made it out of the tunnel. My head has stopped bleeding and I am starting to feel the pain. I got a glimpse of myself in the car mirror. I could look a lot worse. We’re finally at the hideout. I took extra precaution to make sure we weren’t being tailed. As much as I want to get home, my family's safety is more important. I enter in the key code and prints to unlock the door. Just as I open the door I see a nine gauge pointed directly at me. “Don’t shoot.” I yell out. My final plea. Tati is going to shoot me. Tati lowers her gun, and lets out a sigh of relief. I wipe the sweat and blood from my brow. “Axon it’s you. I was so worried.” Tati says. Her eyes are swollen and it looks like she has been crying. All I keep thinking is I caused this. Everything that Tati has gone through is because of me. “Axon you’re bleeding, are you badly hurt? Come here and let me help you clean up and bandage your wounds.” The fight in me is gone and I am mentally and p
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I pull the hidden lever on the floor and reveal a secret passageway. Dragging Marco with me down the slope, I tightly close the entrance. The fire above me burns, destroying everything my father built. Those things could be rebuilt, I only hope my men were okay. As soon as I get to the safe zone. I will be able to investigate and calculate the damage. I set Marco down. He starts hacking and coughing. The black soot is covering his face. We are both gasping for fresh air. My head is aching. If I would have stayed in that building for five more seconds I’m sure I would have passed out completely. Currently we were safe, but for how long? I should have known Carl would come after me sooner rather than later. How did the package make it past security? I scratch my head in frustration. For Carl to have delivered a bomb at the direct time I was there, there must be someone working for him on the inside. But who? I reach into my pocket and pull out my phone. Just as I thought
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I stare at the two in shock. How could this be? The woman resembles Axon, but Axon’s mama is dead. I watch as her crinkled eyes look adoringly at him. I know I shouldn't meddle, but shouldn’t Bianca be here? I still have no idea what happened between Axon and his sister, but it’s high time for a family reunion. Discreetly I slip my phone from my pocket and snap a picture of the two hugging and send it. Bianca won't answer my calls, but just maybe this will get her attention. A few minutes later she replies. ‘Is that my Mom?’I type back a simple ‘yes’ and instantly she replies ‘I’m on my way.’I put the phone back into my pocket so I don’t draw attention to myself. My papa stares at the woman like he has seen a ghost. Eventually, Axon and his mother break apart. “Mama I thought you were dead!” Axon exclaims as tears of joy fall down his face. “I’m so
