Chapter 4

    I should have ran away a long time ago, i hate my life, i hate my family, most especially I hate my dad, my father is too wicked and stone hearted to actually be the one who birthed me, i really wish it’s possible to be able to decide the kind of family I get to be born in. I’m in such a huge mess.

  

  “Jean,jean..open the door,let me in my darling daughter,please hear me out,” my mother shrugged as she kept knocking gently on my door. I had ran upstairs to my room, banged and locked my door right after my dad broke the news that’s about to ruin my entire life. 

  

  I heard my mom’s teary voice behind my door but I ignored,I have no words to say to her, all my brain could process for me right now is to cry.

  

  My mom is too helpless, she is never allowed to make a decision in this family,now I’m sure this was the reason why she was arguing over the phone with my dad. She definitely disagreed with this opinion but when it comes to my dad, absolutely no one can tell him what to do or make him change his mind on whatever it is he has decided to get done.

  

  I’m now convinced that I’m born into the wrong family. The news my father broke to me earlier couldn’t help but linger in my brain as I shed tears sorrowfully leaning behind my door.

  

  Zayn? I don’t even know what kind of human he is, I can’t recognize the kind of man I will be getting married to in a few months? This had better be a nightmare.

  

  “Jean, open the door and hear me out please baby, don’t do this to yourself, you know I love you so much and I want only the best for you, your father said this is the best for you ,please see reasons jean, I’m sor—“

  

  “Let her be! What are you doing there exactly? The announcement made her emotional because she wasn’t expecting it, give her time to digest it , by morning she would feel better.”

  

  I heard his voice sound as wicked and inconsiderate as he is, my dad is truly inhuman. I kept crying, I couldn’t help it, all my life. I never imagined myself being in this kind of awful situation,my father is indeed selfish and cares about himself and his money alone.

  

  “She is hurt,I need to talk to her,i understand her, I really need to explain some things to her, please let me —-“

  

  “Go to your room right now! Jean I will give you tonight to get yourself together and stop being in your feelings, this is reality and you are doing whatever I want you to do, for the benefit of you and this family, I would talk to you in the morning, sleep tight.”  my father screamed and I heard their footsteps as they headed to their room.

  

  So this is really real, I’m getting married to someone I don’t even know yet “oh no!” I whispered as I limped towards my bed. I laid there numb,shocked and extremely tired of how mean life is towards me.

  

                                    **

  

  I needed to pee at midnight ,so I woke up and headed to the washroom. On my way out I decided to leave my door unlocked knowing I would be the first person on my mom’s mind as soon as she wakes up, that’s if she is able to sleep at all . 

  

  I got in my bed and I could only but stare gullibly at the ceiling and imagine how my dad is about to ruin my entire life because of his own selfish interest,this is really not happening to me, how am I supposed to explain to Peter,the actual love of my life!.

  

  “Jean baby, why ain’t you asleep?” I heard my mom’s tender voice as she opened my door and walked in without trying to knock first.

  

  “Mom I ——,” she immediately ran towards me and hugged me tight without letting me complete my statement, I started crying uncontrollably .

  

  “Let it all out baby, I’m sorry to be as helpless as I am in this situation, I’m sorry jean darling, mummy is sorry.” My mom said as she hugged me as tight as ever,I could hear her teary voice,she felt so sorry and I could totally understand her .

  

  “Mom it’s fine, stop blaming yourself, it’s not you! It’s dad” I said as I kept crying and holding her chest close to mine crying uncontrollably, I tried as much as possible to stay quiet because I know she sneaked out to come checkup on me when my dad was already fast asleep. 

  

  “Jean darling, i need you to know your father is not as entirely bad as it seems, he only wants the best for you and for his mafia group, please understand this baby” my mum tried to explain to me pulling me off her chest and holding my face with her two palms and staring desperately into my eyes.

  

  “No mom, he only cares about his mafia group not me or my feelings, I hate him—,”  I said with so much rage in me.

  

   “No baby don’t say that, happy 18th birthday my darling jean,I love you right now and I always will.” she smiled  as she twirled my hair around her fingers.

  

  “You are still wearing the dress from the dinner night , why didn’t you change into your pyjamas?”  She pulled me gently from the bed and tried to help me pull my dress and I obliged, she moved towards my wardrobe to search for any of my pyjamas, her hands settled on one and she wakes back towards me and tried to help me wear it, I refused and wanted to collect it but she disagreed so i allowed her .

  

  “Thank You mum.” I smiled and watched my mother take care of me gently like a 6years old girl, I wouldn’t have wanted a better mum , she is all a child would want in a mom except for the fact that her husband acts like a lion that heads a jungle and can never compromise his decisions for anyone’s sake. 

  

  “I love you Jean,I need you to try to fall asleep now, I gotta get back to the room before your dad notices I left the room, now promise me you’ll try to sleep?  Promise me Jean darling” she took my duvet and covered me up properly and kept smiling, she felt so sorry and helpless and I could feel it.

  

  “Get going mom, I’ll sleep , I promise.” Okay my baby, she replied as she pecked my cheeks and headed towards the door . She blew me a kiss before she closed the door behind her .

  

  I automatically felt extremely better immediately she left, i could only think of how caring and sweet my mother is, “mom deserves a man that cares about her opinions, not my father—— so it’s my birthday today?” I yawned and could feel my eyelids kiss each other .

  

                                        **

  

  Phone rings

  

  “Hi ba-by.” Jean said as she answered the call in her sleepy voice.

  

  “Happy birthday my love, you are the best and you will always be the best. That's why I deserve to be with you, I love you so much.`` Jean felt so emotional hearing these words from Peter, she had mixed feelings but was sure happy.

  

  “Thank You babe.” she said, smiling and blushing.

  

  For a moment I forgot about the awful dinner night I had with my parents yesterday.I wish all that could end up being a dream that I just woke up from right now .

  

  “What did dad say? Why did you need you back home? I dropped you a text yesterday but you didn’t reply, I hope everything is okay?.” He said anxiously.

  

  “Errr—mm it’s nothing serious, I’ll call you back later.” I hanged up immediately without hearing his reply.

   

  “Goodmorning jean, I’m sure you are awake by now, you have few minutes to get dressed, your mother is going to take you to the stylist to get your hair done and to get new dresses, zayn is coming over this evening to meet you and to have a family dinner, my daughter must be looking elegant and beautiful as ever.” He said leaning behind my door,his voice sounded so calm in pretense.

  

  I laid there in bed numb watching my own life crash before me, this is not the kind of life I have always wanted for myself. I do not want to marry off to some zayn in order to keep a mafia group going , I want to be with Peter because I love him , I’m honestly not ready for marriage. I just want to be with Peter because I love him and he loves me more.

  

  “Jane baby , good morning my love. Happy birthday once again my beautiful princess” mom said as she opened my door and walked towards me on the bed and hugged me tight as usual .

  

  “Was your dad here? What did he say? ``Mom asked me inquisitively, pretending to not know what he told me.

  

  “He said you would be taking me to a stylist” I replied smiling and looking into her beautiful brown eye balls.

  

  “Okay darling I will give you 2 hours to get dressed and prepare.i would be waiting for you downstairs. Take your time my love.” Mom said as she headed towards the door and left.

  

         I need to act fast,I need to make a move! It’s now or never.