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Proserpina- Hurting

Proserpina

I lay on the bed, listlessly.

I felt Camilla’s eyes on me. She knew that I was feeling upset but I had realised that the big woman with the strong features and the brusque manner, was actually a kind, caring soul.

She came closer, holding my littlest child in her arms.

“Do you want to hold the baby?” she asked, “I know he is your favourite.”

It was untrue, I loved them all equally but I could see it was a clumsy attempt to make me cheerful. I looked up at her, meeting her bright black eyes and smiled.

*

The smile faltered as I saw the concern in her eyes and I began to cry.

Suddenly I was sobbing, great wrenching sobs, torn from my chest.

“It is alright, it is going to be alright, girl.” she cooed, holding me to her chest. I shook my head wearily.

“No,” I mumbled, “it is never going to be all right.”

I thought of Lucien, the steeliness in his eyes as he had said he would not share me…SHARE me? With Schwartz?

The shame, the pain in me on hearing that! It had been immense.

I
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