Chapter 2. Helena POV

Waking up, I realise I am alone in the bed yet again, Alexander must have got out of bed ahead of me. He says it is because he hates to see how sad I look when he leaves but it hurts me more to wake up alone. I thought the point of having a mate was to never feel lonely again.

He is overwhelmed with work as Alpha of this huge pack, following the battle with the Five Lakes Alpha’s everything turned upside down, including losing his father. These last months have shaken his confidence. Every decision he makes he worries will be the one that destroys his father’s legacy. It has been chaotic with the funeral, the coronation, strategic planning for the pack’s future, a never-ending list of things for a leader to do.

My world has changed too. Now I am officially Luna I cannot just take off running or vanish into the library whenever I feel like it. The daily running of the castle has fallen to me, so I have my fair share of boring meetings to contend with myself. Wrapping an ivory silk robe around me and tying up my mess of brown curls I headed through the double doors of our suite into the study when my heart melted with sadness. 

Alexander did not wake ahead of me, he fell asleep at his desk after working late into the night. Head on the table, his arms splayed, it reminded me of an exhausted child. The kind who collapses asleep whilst insisting they aren’t tired.

Softly, I rub his huge shoulders, lulling him out of sleep. I can’t help but stare adoringly at my handsome mate. Wrapped in a white shirt the muscles of his broad shoulders are clearly defined. His hair, still a long, unruly mess of black curls made my stomach twitch with longing.

I gently stroked my hands through his locks until he gently stirred. His jaw was firm and masculine, everything about him oozed power, yet I could not wait for him to open his eyes. Those powerfully dark, almost black eyes of his still swallowed up every other thought in my head when he turned his hungry gaze upon me.

“Hmm, Hel…what time is it…” he grunted as he slowly came around.

“It is just past nine,” I whispered, gently kissing his shoulder. He flew up from his chair rubbing his face, “I have a meeting in half an hour!” he growled in frustration and quickly vanished into the bathroom. I sighed and sat upon his now-empty desk. A few minutes later he peered out from the bathroom door, with a guilty look on his face.

 I smiled at him, throwing a clean shirt at him from his wardrobe. Why add any more stress to his day. 

Throwing his old white shirt off as he strode forwards, he pulled into his massive chest and squeezed me tightly. I wrapped my arms around as much of him as I could, surprised at how much I had missed his warm body against mine. Fyre, my wolf was doing circles of joy at being back in his arms.

“I know this is hard, and it’s not what either of us wants It is short term I promise, once I have Beta’s I can trust enough I can drop a lot of this work.”

“I know, I can’t help wanting you to myself though,” I murmured, running my hands through his chest hair. I looked up into his eyes and saw those little glitters of purple in his iris that I adored so much.

“This is exactly why I have to leave before you wake you know,” he muttered. With a smirk as he held me closer, “those big brown eyes of yours…” he muttered as his head dived down to meet my lips. Collapsing into each other, we hungrily embraced. Heat spread throughout my body as he gently nuzzled the scar on my collarbone with his stubbled cheek where he had marked me whilst kissing my neck.

I ran my hands through his hair then felt every bit of his bare chest and back that I could. I was like a starving animal at a feast, I desired every single bit of him right there and then. Annoyingly he sensed my eagerness yet broke off his embrace. His eyes glittered with even more purple shards and I knew his wolf was sorely tempted.

“You are trouble, for a man with fifteen minutes to get to a meeting,” he grumbled, shifting some of my curls behind my ear softly.

“Hmm, but what if I was very very…” 

The door knocked sharply before I had a chance to make him late. Alexander quickly threw the new shirt on, and I re-tied my robe and headed back into the bedroom half of our suite. One of Alexander’s Betas had entered to brief him for the day's events. The eventual bang of a closing door told me I faced another day on my own.

Climbing back into bed I weigh up my situation with a pang of sadness. Alexander still doesn’t know who killed his father and it torments him. How can I tell him after all these months that it was Azalea? But that there is no proof, nothing other than a mind-link boast from her that I can't prove even happened.

The only solution I could think of at the time was to recommend her and Ivan move away to Five Lakes, ostensibly as part of securing the new territory. Alpha Dex of the Rising Star pack was absorbing Five Lakes but there were huge shared borderlines that needed assessing and agreeing. 

The guilt of not being completely honest with my mate keeps me awake at night. My wolf Fyre doubles down on the guilt too and begs for me to confess what I know.

Sinking into the soft pillows I am terrified of seeing that tiny little brunette and her uncanny ability to read my thoughts. Ivan is such a valuable Beta and one of my best friends yet I cannot confide in him either. I closed my eyes with the pressure of it all. On top of Alexander, how do I convince my best friend that his mate is a traitor to the pack?