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Chapter 97
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The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 98
Three Months LaterMandy"I'm sorry, Mrs. Barnett. You appear to be having a miscarriage."I knew it immediately when I'd woken up this morning. Something had felt off. This dread in the pit of my stomach hadn't been around since Travis had died and the rest of us went back to the lives we'd abandoned to figure out who was threatening us.We'd been happy. All of us. Especially me. Right now, I can't react, can't seem to quite believe what the doctor is telling me."Mrs. Barnett, do you understand what I'm saying to you?"How can I understand? I was going to have a baby, and now I'm not. This baby was the one right thing that would fix all the wrongs. What was I going to do now?"I'm not pregnant anymore." The words are pushed between my lips emotionless and monotoned."You'll need to have a D&C," he's saying, but I tune him out.I can see Drew at my side, listening to what the doctor says, because Dalton isn't here yet. Maybe I don't even really want him here. "Man
The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 99
DrewChristmas Eve"How are you doing?" I ask Mandy as we sit down around Mom's Christmas tree.It's the one family affair we always make it to. Once we do Christmas with her, we go home, get ready for Santa, and then get a few hours' sleep. Funny, this year we thought we'd be done with Santa, but since Charity's carrying our son, we'll have a lot of fun next year."Okay," she answers, but I can tell she isn't. As far as I know, I'm the only one she's been truthful with, and that's only because I'm so close to Dalton. I'm one of the only people Dalton's talked to about it to, but I can't tell her that. "He came home for a few hours yesterday," she whispers. "To see Walker, and to give him a few Christmas gifts."My heart breaks because I know how bad these two are hurting. "Would you be willing to welcome him home?""I'm going through so much right now." She sighs deeply before looking at me.And there I see it, the dead stare of my twin. I feel her pain almost as acutely
The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 100
VOLUME FOUR: HOLLOWMandy"My name is Mandy and I tried to kill myself."I'm not sure where the strength is coming from for me to say these words in front of a group of people I don't know. But here I am, in a meeting. A meeting I've been told I will have to attend every day while I'm here, and if I want to get better, I may as well get used to it."Hi, Mandy."The amount of voices speaking back to me is more than I thought there would be when I came into this room, but as the time came closer for the meeting, people just kept streaming in. So here I am with a bunch of people I don't know, trying to fix a life that's gone completely sideways."I tried to kill myself too," one of the girls sitting on the opposite side of the circle from me says. "Went at my wrist with a pink razor, complete with moisturizing strip."There are some laughs, and it makes me feel slightly better about my situation."The thing was," she continues. "I didn't really want it to work, and mayb
The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 101
Dalton"I can take your shift if you need me to." Wild reaches over, grabbing a chip from the basket in front of us, dipping it into the queso we all love."You have enough shit going on in your life, I can take my shift. I'll ask Denise to watch Walker," I argue, grabbing a chip of my own.It's only been a few days since Mandy left, but it feels like a few months. I miss her, more than I did when she was at the house and I was at the clubhouse. Back then, I always knew I could go there and check on her if need be. Right now, she's fifty miles north, and I'm going out of my fucking mind, wondering if she's okay.But this is part of the process that will, with any luck, make her better, and if it's going to bring her back to me, I'll deal with anything thrown my way."How's Walker doing?" he asks as our plates come to the table. I lean back, admiring the smoking plate of fajitas in front of me. The two of us don't normally have lunch together, but when he asked, I accepted.
The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 102
MandyAnother day. Another letter.One step closer to finding out why I am the way I am. At least that's what I keep telling myself. Today finds me not walking as confidently to Dr. Crawford's office as I did the first couple of days. I'm unsure why, but there's a trepidation about the piece of paper I hold in my hand.Knocking softly, I wonder if it's because I'm not sure I want her to hear me. It doesn't matter, because I hear her strong voice saying come in. I do as she says, with palms sweating and my knees weak. "Hey, Mandy." She smiles from where she already sits in her chair. "How are you doing today?"I don't answer until I have a seat and get comfortable. A sigh works its way past my throat. "I'm not sure. The first couple of days we talked and I wrote letters, it was interesting to see how I could express myself. Today though, I'm not as interested in what I wrote.""It's okay to be uncomfortable." She leans forward, her eyes locking onto mine. "We can't get p
The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 103
DaltonIn the first decade of Walker's life, I've never had to go to school to pick him up - that was always something Mandy managed. Either she'd take care of it, or arrange for someone else to. We've always been good at splitting everything when it comes to the day-to-day, and anything having to do with Walker's health fell to her. His safety fell to me.So I don't know how to handle this.Having to get him at school two days in less than a week. Especially when he's sick and hurting from missing his mom.I'm driving the shop truck when I come to a screeching halt in the parking spot reserved for parents at the front of the school. About the only thing I do know is he probably shouldn't be on the back of my bike if he has a fever.I drum my thumb on the steering wheel, wondering what the fuck I'm supposed to do. How am I supposed to handle all this shit by myself?It's what Mandy's been doing, isn't it? My fucking subconscious taunts me.It's what she wanted.I
The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 104
DaltonI don't think I've ever felt more inadequate as a father, than right now. Standing in this line of parents waiting to get registered in order to be seen is trying my patience. People aren't being polite, and Walker is burning up.A couple minutes into this stand-off we've got going on, he hugged himself to me and hasn't let go yet. He's on fucking fire. I'm about at the end of my rope when the woman at the front of the line starts making a fuss about paying a fifteen-dollar copay.Normally, I'm the cool one and Drew is the hothead, but I wear my VP patch proudly. "Look, lady, if it'll get you to move your ass, I'll pay your damn copay. There's other people with sick kids here."Everyone turns, eyeing not only me, but Walker, and my cut. It's not very often I use it to my advantage, but today I stand to my full height and let them look their fill. She doesn't say anything else, she turns, grabs something out of her purse and slides it across the counter. It must have b
The Heaven Hill Generations Series Chapter 105
MandyThe circle is a little smaller today. Two people who have been in my group since I got here got to go home. Looking down at my engagement and wedding rings, I'm hit with a longing to see Dalton and Walker again. A type of longing I haven't felt in years. It could be the new medication they have me on to control my mood swings, or it could be that I'm finally coming out from underneath this dark cloud I've been under for so long. "When was the first time you realized you weren't like everybody else?"The leader of our circle asks the question, and I do like I've done every day since I got here a week ago - I truly think about it. I close my eyes and settle into the question, giving it a few moments to dig itself into my conscience and then answer it truthfully. When it comes to my turn, I speak slowly."The day my mom was served papers saying that they were going to take our house." I clasp my hands together in front of me. "Things had been rough prior to that. Me and
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