Veronica The door opened at that moment. There was no knock first. We both turned to find Stefan standing there. His mouth fell open, and he didn't speak for a long time. Finally, I moved, sliding the veil from my head, and facing him."It's bad luck for the groom to see his bride before the wedding," the seamstress said with a wink.Was she oblivious to the tension between us?"This is no ordinary wedding," I muttered.Stefan cleared his throat and dragged his gaze from me. "Do you need anything?" he asked the seamstress."No, I should be fine. I'll have it back within a few days. Not too much to do.""Good." He looked me over again, his expression strange, tight. He then nodded, walked back out, and closed the door. The seamstress helped me undress and carefully placed the gown back in its bag. After gathering her things, she said good-bye and left.Feeling the weight of jet lag, I lay down to close my eyes for a few minutes, but those few minutes turned into two nightmarish hours.
VeronicaMy heart beat hard as he swam out to me, his dark head parting the water like a shark as, with two powerful strokes, he was at my side, then had me cornered, his arms trapping me at the edge of the pool."One thing I learned early in life is never let your enemies see your fear." He moved in closer, his wet face inches from mine. "Never let them smell it on you because it's like a fucking drug." He inhaled deeply. "You can get high from it, Veronica.""Are you my enemy?" I asked, focusing on that one word. Unable to think about the rest. Knowing it was true."I'm not your friend, am I?""No.""Your eyes betray your desire, Veronica. Your hunger.""You don't see very clearly, Stefan.""I see very clearly. And I read you like a fucking book."I looked away, very aware of his body so close to mine, very aware of how my lips parted and my tongue darted out to lick them. And how he watched that little involuntary movement so knowingly."You're curious, Veronica. At least admit it
Stefan"Look at me, Veronica."She did, and her pale eyes searched mine. Inside them I saw humiliation. I saw sadness. Uncertainty. I saw vulnerability, and I saw a loneliness, a longing, a hope, that I recognized. One I couldn't ignore. One that threatened to resurrect a part of me I'd buried long ago.One I intended on keeping buried.I knew only one way to shut it down, and I needed to shut it the fuck down. Now.Anger boiled inside me. Rage at my own weakness. My weakness around her."I own you," I said, gripping her jaw harder than I needed to and bringing her face to me."Stop!""When I want to fucking kiss you, I'll fucking kiss you." To prove my point, I mashed my lips over hers. This time, they didn't open. They didn't yield like they had just a few moments ago.Good. That was good. That was the point.I released her, and she tried to scramble away, scraping her thigh on the edge of the pool as she tried to slip out of my grasp but ending up on her back instead, with me on top
StefanTake care when fighting the monsters you don't become one.My mom used to tell me that. All the time. It was her favorite fucking quote from Nietzsche.I fought for her too. I fought him. I always lost. I always knew I'd lose, but I did it anyway, and I took the penalties, endured the consequences.I guess I didn't realize when the transformation had happened. When the monster had beaten me. Had taken me over and made me like him. Like my father.I staggered to my feet like a drunken man and went into the house, up to my room, unable to even look at her closed door. I didn't bother to shower. I just pulled on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt, got into my car, and drove, not sure where I was even going until I pulled up to the seminary gates. I'd never been here before. It was while I was in prison that Stephen had told me his plans. We hadn't really talked much before that. Stephen and I, we were as opposite as could be. I guess, though, in a way, we were both surviving.My father
VeronicaIt wasn't hard to avoid Stefan after the incident at the pool. He seemed to be avoiding me too. He seemed to have always eaten before I did, and I kept to my room when I didn't have to go downstairs to take care of Charlie. I didn't know where Stefan was most of the time, and I didn't want to care. But I did.He had two sides to him, and he flipped with deadly precision on a dime. His demons were so dark and so deep that when they reared their heads, when they overtook him, he was the scariest beast of all. A man filled with hate and vengeance. But wasn't it those very things that had broken him?But that fissure, it only made him more dangerous because that hurt, it could swallow me up too. It could destroy me like it was him.I could still feel him on my lips, his mouth on mine, his tongue inside my own when I'd opened to him. Like some fool, I'd yielded and so fucking easily. He hadn't even had to make me. If he made me, it would be easier. If he made me, I could hate him.
VeronicaI gasped, but he swallowed the sound, his hand at the back of my skull holding me in place as his lips moved over mine, slow and soft, tasting me. When his tongue probed, I opened, and he slid inside. I tilted my head, and he pressed against me. When he did, I felt him, his hardness, at my belly.I would have stopped the kiss.I did.But he held me and reclaimed my mouth, and this time, urgency replaced the gentler exploration of moments ago. His kiss was hungry, ravenous almost, and his desire only seemed to wake the same inside me. I raised my hand and laid it against his arm, liking the feel of hard muscle there. Feeling somehow safe for it. My body eased, relaxing into him, and my eyelids fluttered closed.But then he broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against mine.His breath came heavy. His hands moved to my hips, holding me."I'm fucked up right now," he said. "You need to go upstairs."I raised my head to look at his face, into his eyes. They told so much he didn'
StefanI sat in my study with the door locked, reading for the hundredth time the amendment to the contract that her grandfather had made. As much as I hated him for it, part of me wanted it, rejoiced in it.That was the sick part. The part I tried to warn her about. The part she felt sure didn't exist.I shook my head, my thoughts wandering again to last night. I should put a lock on that cellar door. I couldn't have her go down there again. I couldn't have her see what lay beneath those sheets. Hell, I should seal that door. Maybe then I could forget the things that had happened in that room.Last night was the first time I'd been there in more than six years. It was raining, and I had needed to go to the chapel. To the cemetery behind it. I hadn't shown Veronica that part when I'd shown her the small church. It seemed too personal, too private. My excuse to use the tunnel had been the rain, although it was flimsy. I didn't care about getting wet, and if I did, I could have driven.
VeronicaI didn't see Stefan for three days after what happened in the cellar. Maria just said he'd gone out on business. I don't know how I'd missed him leaving the bed that morning. I wondered what time he had left. I hadn't even felt him move when he'd climbed out of bed. All I knew was I'd slept like a rock in the warmth and safety of his arms. This man who would steal me away—he was the one who made me feel safer than I'd felt in years. Ever since my parents had died.I'd been so young, but with Robyn being younger, I'd become her protector, in a way. It wasn't even a conscious thing. It felt good to finally let go. So good, it made me realize how I'd been holding on for so long.But what about Robyn now? What would happen to her, now that I was gone? Who would protect her?This idiocy about feeling safe in Stefan's arms, what was that? Shouldn't I feel the most afraid there?But the image of him that night in the cellar, of his eyes, I couldn't get it out of my head.Stefan Arma