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CHAPTER 70

(AHVI'S POINT OF VIEW)

I stare at the mirror of the bathroom and my miserable reflection only stares back at me but my eyes are fixed on my flat tummy, where a baby rests, unaware of the misery this world has to offer.

Shakily, I place my hands at the top of my stomach—I try to feel. Is there really a baby in there? How can a living being grow inside me? How can I bring a child to this world to suffer the same fate as me?

Suddenly, I recall the doctor's words again. ‘You are still young; perhaps you want to consider abortion or adoption.’

A tear runs down my face as those words reverberate. Abortion or adoption. How can I choose to make my child suffer for the sins that neither of us committed?

“This is all your dad’s fault.” I cry to my reflection. “He lied to me; he lied to us.”

Was this how my mom felt when she discovered she was pregnant with me? Will I come to hate this child just the way my mom hates the sight of me? But my child is conceived with love, even if it's one-sided.
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