(AHVI’S POINT OF VIEW)It's 6 pm on a Saturday. After a long, grueling day at practice, my body aches and begs for a bed, but as soon as I walk into the living room of the house where I grew up, I wish I hadn't.The stench of smoked tobacco in the air is so overwhelming that I have to clap a hand over my nose to avoid inhaling it.The floor is littered with empty cans of beer and other unknown alcohol, particles of half-burned cigarettes, and a cloud of smoke, and amid the chaos is the familiar form of my Mom, crouched on the floor, her back against a sofa, and a full stick of cigarette stuck between her fingers.In an instant, my body is leaking feelings to the surface as my jaw tightens, and my hands clamp hard around the rucksack on my shoulder. Not again! I thought she stopped when she got married to David! “Mom,” My voice is barely audible as I try to contain the flood of emotions as she raises the cigarette to her lips but comes to a halt at the sound of my voice. She looks at
(AHVI’S POINT OF VIEW)When I'm done with my morning routine, it's around 9 in the morning. I stroll down the stairs, carrying my practice rucksack, into the living room. I want to forget but the events of last night come rushing back though there is no evidence of dirt or anything, Everything is shiny but that won't be able to erase everything that happened.Just then, Mom and David stroll down the stairs together. Without a moment's delay, I begin walking towards the door but David's voice makes me pause in the middle of the room.“Ahvi,”The sound of my name makes me clench my knuckles knowing he is going to do it again; being the peacemaker between us. Exhaling, I turn back around. David looks relieved I don't walk out while Mom's looking at the floor. My eyes flicker between them.Even in a hundred years, she still won't deserve him. David is too good for us. “Your Mom told me what happened last night,” David starts. “And she regrets every moment of it,” I look at my Mom, she'
(AHVI'S POINT OF VIEW)Coming to practice is one thing I always look forward to; it's my only escape and it gets even better when Raven gets to escort me. It's fun seeing her trying to skate but only ends up falling on her ass for times I've lost count and after another failed attempt, Raven gives up with an exhalation and doesn't bother getting up from her position inside the ice rink.I giggle and slide towards her on my skates and pass her a bottle of water she'd shoved in my hand earlier. She takes the bottle from me with a snort and I sit in front of her with another laugh.“I just don't get how you do this, I'm flexible too you know. I can bend however you want,” her tone goes from annoyed to teasing in a second at the last part of her sentence which tells me she isn't talking about skating anymore. For someone who's a virgin, she's never shy to open her big mouth and say absurd things.“I'm a professional in his field just as how you're good on the tracks.” Although we share a
(AHVI'S POINT OF VIEW)“Ahvi,”I lift my head from my phone at the sound of my name, finding David coming out from the kitchen with an apron around his hips. “Can you go get Vance? Dinner is ready,” I stab my inner cheek with my tongue, watching as David goes back to the kitchen. I stand up from the living room sofa and drag my feet to the staircase.I take my time and arrive a minute later. I stand in front of Vance's door and knock with enough reticence. However, the door opens rather. With a gulp, I shove my head in.“Vance?” I call in confusion, inspecting the empty room. Deliberately, I make my way inside and stand in the middle. The room looks disorganized with clothes all over the floor and the bed looks like someone just got up from it. That's when I hear the bathroom door click open and sharply, I turn just as Vance steps out of the bathroom with nothing but sweatpants on his hips and a bare chest. He has a habit of being half-naked!“What are you doing here?” His voice is
(AHVI'S POINT OF VIEW)Two weeks pass in a jiffy with no sign of Vance and there's this sickness in my stomach that has been persistent ever since; it makes me uncomfortable.I tried questioning David about it, but he constantly dismisses it with a shrug, claiming Vance is a full-grown man capable of caring for him, but what if he winds up dead somewhere no one can find?The thought causes me to shake my head, and for the nth time, I am staring down at my phone, debating whether to call or not. It isn't weird to call my stepbrother and ask about his whereabouts and health right? That I should be thus concerned is only natural—he is family. It's only weird that I haven't called him this long when I know he's sick.With a nod, I turn on my phone and dial Vance's number but at that moment, the door of my bed opens and my mom enters. She never comes into my room unless she wants me to do something, what does she want this time?She approaches the bed I am sitting on with my legs folded an
(AHVI'S POINT OF VIEW)The stadium is empty since it's almost past 10 pm and I'm the only one left there, on the ice rink, trying to recreate the steps taught to me by the choreographer. While I have no struggle getting the spins and turns, my head is enveloped in thoughts of my Mom.Since she'd always ignored me as a child by leaving me with my grandma, I never had a bond with her. I avoided her as a child because of the disgust in her eyes whenever she saw me; I only became accustomed to it as I grew older. She is in pain, as evidenced by the permanent look in her eyes, but how can I tell what she is feeling when I do not know what she has been through?I have become accustomed to her being referred to as a mistake and a mishap. I grew up feeling unwanted and unloved and she thinks I'm being inconsiderate when she asks me to do the absurdist things. “Your feet placement is wrong,” The unexpected voice causes me to turn, but I slide on the ice and land up on my ass. “Ouch!” I cry o
(AHVI'S POINT OF VIEW)There are a few times I wish David could stop straining so hard to keep the family glued together. Like not suggesting a family bonding time at the seaside and I wish Vance could have kept his mouth shut and not consented to what his father said and here we are; on the road, heading to the beach for the weekend.I sigh as I peek out the window of the moving car, making an effort not to feel Vance's presence beside me in the back seat and only watch the moving structures.“Do we really have to do this, David? There are multiple things I need to take care of for my project and going to a beach isn't going to get the work done faster,” Mom grumbles from the front seat beside David who has his hands on the wheels and attention on the road.“Come on, it's going to be fun. Our lives don't always have to pivot around work, Jade,” I realize it's the first time I've heard him use my mother's name. It sounds peculiar coming from him since he's one with pet names.“I know
(AHVI'S POINT OF VIEW)I've made frivolous life decisions that I feel were inevitable and they had to happen, but never have I made a mistake this ludicrous!Drinking!God! Ahvi! What the hell were you thinking?!I facepalm for the nth time since I woke up feeling afloat and with a pounding headache, I could have detoured so early in the morning if I wasn't so damn fatuous!My grunts get noisier when I hear the sound of my phone that rests on the nightstand. I don't recall putting it there but I take it and answer the call.“We've been waiting for you Ahvi. The breakfast is getting cold!” My mom's voice comes from the other side. “I didn't think you were one to sleep this late and heavy and tell your brother too!” With a beep, the call ends. I curse under my breath and thank heaven when I notice the room is barren of Vance. Where did he go? I hiss. Likely on his phone again!My head stays stuck in vapor and my vision remains blurry till I'm under the shower and then suddenly, everyth