Confusion

A completely normal young girl would have been totally angry and perturbed with the present situation I had found myself in, but I guess normality becomes just a phrase when you've died twice. I was a little bit fascinated with the fact that I was in another time and age. I was excited to learn about their culture. Nevertheless, a part of me was begging for an explanation. Screaming for answers from someone I wasn't sure could hear me. Just hoping that I would get what I earnestly desired but when that wasn't forthcoming, I decided to at least stay alive.

I looked at the food that was placed in front of me and the sight of it was disgusting. I was sure the food would taste as bad as it looked but considering the fact that the hospital I was placed in didn't look like a "semi-prison", I wanted to give them the benefit of doubt. I glanced at the nurse who brought the food and she smiled gently at me. Her action urged me to carry the spoon and start eating. I was hugely disappointed at the outcome. The food was tasteless. Rumors of it being the best in the town had me wondering what kind of fucked up city I've been sent to. I looked up to see the nurse still staring down at me, I slightly pushed the food away and she looked at me sternly. She must have thought that I'm a scared little girl who does everything to please the people around her. I laid back on the bed and when she wouldn't leave the room, I spoke my mind.

"I'm not eating that. It's either you get me something else with a little bit of taste in it or you watch as I starve myself to death."

"This is what the doctor recommended for you to eat." She said loudly. I looked at her in disbelief. She is obviously joking.

"You're joking, right? That doesn't really matter. Tell the doctor that I won't be eating that crap. I just got back from the dead, that food will only take me back there and I've been there, it's not a really lovely place. So thanks for the food but I'll pass on that posion." I smiled at her and watched her as she was about to scream out. I believe she realized that she couldn't do that, so she just took the food and stormed out. I was even happy that she was gone, finally I could have some peace and quiet.

I knew I won't like New Orleans. The only person that would have made me like staying in this town was Derek and now he is gone. I know that he is not really gone but this was terrible. I was stuck in this whole other world with nobody that I knew. All my friends think I am dead and to them I was dead but in reality I was alive in somebody else's body. I just wanted to scream and maybe have some peace of mind.

A male nurse was sent to bring me a another plate of food and also to check up on me. I opened the food that was brought to me and smiled as I finally saw something salivating. I savored every taste of the meal and then I went back to sleep. I woke up to see the male nurse checking my vitals. He kept coming back after every 30 minutes. I guess they didn't have many dead people come back to life and they wanted to ensure that the first person that did,was monitored at all times.

The body of the girl I was reincarnated in is Rebecca Jail. She is 16 years old and has two brothers: James and Jeffrey Jail. 

She was supposed to go to science camp and on the drive there,she had the accident that made her lose her life.

Throughout the stay in the hospital,she didn't have any friends come visit her. It gave me the impression that she must have been a loner like me. At least I won't have to deal with so much drama from teenagers, that thought left me feeling satisfied.

I wasn't really a loner anymore, all thanks to Sandra. I wonder how she must be feeling now. I am sure the news of my death must have spread to the school by now. 

I even wondered if Derek was upset when he got the news. As for my father,I couldn't care less about what he is going through. I didn't want him to be hurting but I didn't want him to be okay either, I was just numb at it.

He killed my mother and then tried to rape me. This realization led to a part of me honestly wishing that the guilt of his actions will drive him to a slow agonizing death.

I was so busy swimming in my anger for my father that I didn't notice the two drop dead gorgeous guys standing in front of me.

One had a tanned skin,with lovely ebony black hair. The jawline was very defined and he had cat eyes that was covered with a dashing long eyelash.

The other was a little bit pale with beautiful blonde hair and blue eyes that made you to not really notice his pink plump lips.

"OMG Becky, I can't believe that you are really alive. I just had to come see for myself." The tanned one said

"Wouldn't you have come otherwise?" shocked at the sentence,I asked.

He paused before he answered. "No,not at all. I was just in a state of disbelief when mom told me about it. I thought she was in denial."

"Don't mind Jeffrey" the pale one finally spoke "you know he always talk like that. So,how are you feeling?" 

"I'm okay. Hanging in there.

"Yeah,we can see from the..."

"Jeff,stop!" James ordered. At that moment I knew that James was the oldest.

To ease the tension in the room,I asked "so where is mom?"

"She is at work. Yeah,she took so many days off already. If she stayed back again,she would have been sacked. So she had to go. But dad will be here anytime soon."

"Why? Doesn't he have to work?"

The both looked at me with a sympathizing look. "You know when the doctor told us that you had lost your memory,we actually thought you would remember some things about your family." Well he obviously didn't know how memory loss works. I know that some people are able to remember some parts of their life even after they must have lost their memory but I was not that type of person. After all,I didn't lose my memory. They are all in my brain. They are still taunting me and sometimes I hope that for a spilt second I will be free of the drowning thoughts of misery and what lies ahead of me. I wished I could scream to their faces, ''I didn't lose my memory. I can't remember anything about Rebecca Jail because I am not Rebecca Jail!'

James smacked Jeff over the head for saying that and then he tried to sugar coat what Jeff just said. "What he means by that is that our father is a stay at home dad."

I laughed. A full belly aching laughter. "Are you serious? That's the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. A stay at home dad. How is he comfortable with doing that?"

"Well,he got laid off his former work some months ago and it has been difficult trying to find another job now in this economy." James answered.

"This economy? It's the 21st century. America couldn't be greater. With the government taking a medium amount for tax rate,what could the problem possibly be?" I stopped talking because they were looking at me as if I had lost my mind.

Unable to bare the silence anymore I asked "What is with the faces?"

"Did you just say 21st century?" James asked and I noded my head in a way of saying yes.

"The doctor didn't mention that you are now retarded." Jeff with a bit of British accent said. I did not know what his problem was but he was about to learn the hard way that I never take trash when it's been thrown at me.

"Hey you, watch your mouth pretty boy,I may be lying on this bed but I can still give you the beating of your life if I see fit."

They all looked very surprised at my answer. "I am sorry,he didn't mean that. Just that we are a little bit surprised that you think we are in the 21st century." James once again tried tirelessly to defend his brother. 

"So which century are we then?"

"20th century,baby!" Jeff answered so proudly. Just then,dad walked him leaving me with no time to process my thoughts.

She wasn't joking when she said that they will send me back in time. But they didn't just send me back in time. They sent me back to be stucked in the body of a shy girl with no friends and a jerk for a brother. 

Well if life isn't just perfect for me!