I sit at work typing names and taking calls, like the good little receptionist I'm paid to be. I'm smiling, being polite, and doing everything I should as the first point of contact for the psychology business my boss, Mason, is running here. Deep down, however, I'm scowling. I hate my job. I used to enjoy the work, but I've been glancing around the same spacious, sterile waiting room for the last two years and I'm over it. I should quit and find something more fulfilling, but I'm put off by the thought of Mason's negative reaction to my resignation.I hope one day I can do something different with my life, like writing love stories or children's books. Of course, my mother doesn't consider writing an actual career, neither does Blade. When I brought it up with him, he snorted and said, "Reading sucks."Since when does reading suck? If I ran the world, people who didn't read would be the first to go. Boom. Put them out of their misery.I pick up an entered patient information form and
Selena and I pull into our favorite steakhouse off the main road, a few streets from my father's gym. She fought tooth and nail for Mexican, but I think I made it clear I never want to set foot in Maine's only Mexican restaurant again. Ever. Inside the steakhouse, a lovely red-headed waitress seats us in a large booth by a window that showcases the not-so-beautiful scenery of the semi-dilapidated parking lot we parked in, and a small block of stores that could use an upgrade. "I am so sick of living in this place," Selena groans, shuddering away from the view."Tell me about it." The waitress simpers, opening her tiny notepad. "What can I get you, ladies?"Selena doesn't bother looking at the menu. This place sells her favorite kind of fries, and she can't get enough of their specialty craft beer. "I'll have a plate of cheesy fries and a jug of your best beer, please," she says, ordering exactly as I expect her to. Even so, I still arch an eyebrow at her. "That's it? No vegetables?
Tingles pulse in waves, heightening every nerve in my body. They dance up my spine, wrapping themselves around each vertebra until they reach my hairline at the top of my neck. I stare at his full lips, lips that look like they were expertly molded to give the most perfect kisses and deliver the naughtiest promises. They curve slightly, a teasing smirk, daring me to acknowledge him.Why would I? We don't know each other. We're not friends. I avert my gaze to the menu beside me and pluck it from its holder. Opening it, I pull it up to cover my burning face and buy myself a few seconds to catch my breath. What are the odds of him being here at the same time I am? Please, for the love of God, don't let him come over here. I barely manage to control my racing heart when two long, thick fingers curl around the top of the menu. Oh, no. Blood drains from my face and pools in the deep pit of my stomach as the thick menu card is pulled from my hands."Olivia," he says in a voice so sinfully r
Spending last night at home with my best friend, eating snacks and watching movies, was exactly what the doctor ordered. Last night was the first time in a long time I've truly felt at peace. I even slept through the night. I can't recall the last time I had an unbroken sleep.I approach my father's gym and, as I curl my fingers around the long door handle, I realize I'm holding my breath. Why? Probably because I'm afraid of running into Seth. He has a way of burrowing under my skin with a single look and it terrifies me. I barely know him, yet he's controlled every thought I've had these past few days. It's insane. Exhaling, I shake my head, open the door, and step inside. Do not look at him. Do not look at him, I tell myself.And I fail miserably. My eyes betray me, darting straight to where he was standing yesterday. Nothing. I pout when my gaze falls onto an empty space. Seth isn't here. Suddenly, my motivation to be at the gym depletes. I wish I was back in bed, sleeping."Olivi
I hate clubbing. The last time I went was Selena's birthday two years ago. And because I don't usually go clubbing, my range of short, sexy dresses is limited. Extremely limited.I hold up two dresses. One, a black halter neck and the other a coral off-the-shoulder cocktail dress. I don't want to wear either of them. I throw both the dresses on the floor and fall onto my bed with a loud sigh. The sun went down a few hours ago and Selena will be here any minute. As the thought passes, the muted pound of an energetic knock sounds on my front door. I groan, rolling onto my side."O?" she shouts. "Open the door.""All right," I mutter as I drag myself to my feet, throw on my white, fluffy robe, and amble lazily through my apartment to answer the door.I pull the heavy, wooden door back and meet Selena's bare face. I smile. Gorgeous. With her thick eyelashes, high cheekbones, plump lips, and flawless complexion, she's one of those genetically blessed women."I'm so excited!" she shrieks, bo
I squeeze my eyes shut and brace for impact when I'm snapped to a halt. My breath hitches as the tips of my fingers barely graze the ground and my eyes flutter open. I rush out an exhale, easing the adrenaline in my veins, and blink at the dirty ground. I'm hyperaware of the strong, thick arm wrapped around my waist and the impossibly large hand splayed against my rib cage. Wow. That could've ended badly...Selena howls with laughter as Seth eases me to standing position, but she's background noise to the sound of my heart pounding in my ears. I turn my head and peer up at him. He stares down at me, his face hard, his full lips pursed. He's irritated, but I don't care. All I care about is the delightful smell emanating from his body. Whatever it is, it's incredible, earthy, and rich.And his arm feels good around me. Too good......it's scrambling my brain. With slow, careful movements, Seth releases me to stand on my own and I thank him in a whisper, looking away from his penetrativ
My eyelids flutter before I blink them on purpose, clearing the blurriness that coats my pupils like Vaseline. When the sharp lines of reality return, I squint into my spacious white room. I'm still on my stomach on my bed, and still wrapped in my pink towel, albeit haphazardly. My stomach churns aggravated by hunger and the fumes of last night's alcohol. Last night. Seth. A zip of excitement zings through my ribcage as I vividly recall his mouth on mine. I groan and turn my head into my mattress, burying my face in the blankets. I wonder if he'll be at the gym this morning? The excitement in my chest melts into mortification. I can't face him after what happened between us. I can't see him again. Not ever. Exhaling, I turn my head to glance at the digital clock on my bedside table. 9:00 A.M. I rub my dry lips together, then run my tongue between them, as I blink at the clock. I hum, too bleary-eyed and disoriented to register the incoherent nagging in the back of my mind. I frown.
I cross the gym's parking lot and pull on the big door, but it doesn't budge. I frown and peer through the glass. No one. Strange. Dad never closes early. I use the spare gym key hanging from my car's keyring and unlock the door. Dad gave me the spare key to come and go whenever I please, even if it's closed. I guess today is one of those days. Stepping inside, I lock the door behind me and make a mental note to call him when I'm finished. I turn around and shout, clasping my hand over my chest as my heart leaps into my throat. At least eight pairs of eyes are on me, curiously watching from beside the big boxing ring. I spot my father at the front of the group as he smiles and waves. I offer a pathetic wave back and my attention immediately sweeps to the man in the center of the ring.Seth. Sweating and panting, his skin glistens like it did in my mind all night. I swallow hard and my knees tremble at the sight. Seth's lips quirk and my cheeks heat up under his amused gaze. He looks
I push away from the heavy bag with a sigh, then drag an inhale in through my nose. My lungs burn, and my arms feel like stones. I pluck the towel from my shoulder and swipe it over my face. I've been slamming my fists into this bag of sand for the last hour, waiting for Olivia to finish cleaning the gym. There's no one left, the doors are locked, the blinds drawn, but she insists on having everything in top shape for when it opens in the morning.I can't say I don't enjoy watching her walk around the place with a determined little pout on her lips, because I do. I enjoy it so damn much.Blowing air from my lips, I lean against the ropes of the boxing ring. She does another round, picking up a missed towel here and there. I track her every step, my shorts growing tighter every time she bends over. Eventually, she enters my area of the gym.She doesn't pay me any attention.And it drives me crazy."Olivia," I call out, and she whips her head in my direction, her perfect, long hair whirl
I sit in my car outside Mom's house, gripping my steering. I stare at the quaint little home nestled somewhere in the middle of Sparrow Road and dread burrows deep. If I walk through those doors, I'll be alone in the house for the first time since Dad's death. The thought is isolating.Chase left for Pakistan this morning and Mom is spending alone time in a hideaway cabin in the hills. The house will be quiet. And I'll be alone.Loneliness has been the theme of my life for more days than I can count. I miss Dad. I miss Seth. It gets harder to pin Seth down with a phone call with every passing day. He calls me and I miss it. I call him back and he misses it. By the time we catch each other, he's exhausted and sleeping on the other end of the line before I can ask him how he is. He asks me to join him in every city he lands in, but I haven't had the heart to leave Mom alone, especially now Chase is gone.Releasing the wheel, I sit back against my seat with a sigh. The vermilion afternoon
With a shake of his arms, Seth tilts his head to the ceiling, exposing the thick column of his throat, and he closes his eyes. His chest falls as he lets out a long, slow breath. What I wouldn't give to know what he's thinking. Is he nervous? Scared? Neither?A small eternity later, the referee calls both the men to the middle of the ring. He demands a good, clean fight, then sends them back to their corner. With a clap of his hands, the fight begins.Seth plays it cool, each step premeditated and predatory. Don, however, goes in guns blazing. Shooting forward, and swallowing up the distance, Don swings hard and fast, his fists flying through the air like sledgehammers. He wants to make sure that, if he connects, Seth won't get back up.I yank my blanket from Chase and pull it up to my chin. I clench my teeth together. My fingers twitch with the urge to hide under the blanket until it's over, but I told Seth I'd watch the fight.And I want to watch it......but only if Don gets what he
I startle, sitting upright on the couch as the T.V. changes from the live stream loading screen to the emerald exterior of Las Vegas's MGM Grand. "Shhhh!" I shush Chase mid-story about some girl he met when he was stationed in Afghanistan by clamping my palm over his face and pushing him away. I've already heard the story twice. He's in love with her but doesn't know it. "It's starting!" On the screen, cars zip by, and people flood the streets, milling about like ants. "It's an eight-man fighting format," the commentator says as the camera phases into the arena. "The winner receives one hundred thousand dollars, a professional contract with the MMAC, and the title of Amateur Champion."They continue to discuss the layout of the championship and I tune it out. I'm too distracted by the grandiosity of it all as the camera pans over tens of thousands of roaring people, seated around the cage, ready for the fight. "It's a big deal, isn't it?" Chase muses between chomps of buttered popc
"What are you doing out here?" I ask. How long has he been out here? Blush gathers in my cheeks at the thought of him hearing the things I said about him. About us."Hiding from Darryl." Seth lowers his hands and straightens. The way he holds himself with such confidence is breathtaking. "Saving you from your asshole ex. Again." I sigh and turn toward the swing. I sit down on it and pat the space beside me. Seth looks up at the worn branch while shrugging out of his jacket. "That's not going to hold me." I glance up, then at Seth. If he weighs every bit of the two-hundred pounds Chase claims he does, then I suppose it won't. I shift into the middle of the plank as Seth steps forward and drapes his jacket over my shoulders. The fabric envelops me and I melt into its warmth, into its crisp citrus and sandalwood scents. "I saw him follow you out here," Seth says, rolling up the sleeves of his fitted, black formal shirt. Each twist of the fabric reveals an inch of, perfect ropy muscle
After the funeral, Mom invites over as many people as she can fit into her home for refreshments. They come in droves and I'm too tired to entertain, but I do it anyway. I accept condolences and hugs with grace and enthusiasm and I mingle with relatives I haven't seen since I was a child, relatives who live on the other side of the country. I keep Seth in my peripheral the whole time, wanting nothing more than to be spending this time with him since he flew all this way on the eve of his championship match. I want his touch, his comfort, and maybe that's selfish, but after the day I've had...I just want to be coddled. Chase keeps Seth out of my reach and insists on interrogating him under the guise of friendly conversation. I've tried to save him, but I can barely move a foot before I'm swept up by someone else. I wonder if Seth thinks I'm avoiding him, or can he feel my aura pining for his? Can he feel every cell in my being pushing against my skin, willing me in his direction? I hop
Funerals happen a lot quicker than I imagined they would. This is the first time I've been at the helm of planning one and I didn't realize I'd be expected to make sensible and coherent decisions while drowning in an ocean of grief. I thought I'd have more time to come to terms with the fact my father has passed. I thought I'd wake up from this nightmare by now.To make matters worse, Seth is in Vegas. His schedule didn't allow a trip back to Portland for Dad's funeral. He demanded the MMAC approve his request for a twenty-four-hour leave, but they declined it because Dad wasn't immediate family. The championship fight is tomorrow night and it's a risk they can't take. And I get it. It just sucks. He's been so busy we've barely spoken. He calls me after midnight every night, but we fall asleep before the conversation goes anywhere. I miss him."Shit," I swear as the zipper of my dress eludes me for the millionth time.It sits between my shoulder blades, where I can't reach, taunting me
We pull up outside my parents' home and I cast my gaze over the property. It looks exactly as it did when I left Portland and I don't know why that surprises me. I don't know why I expected it to be any different. The glow of the sitting room light filters through the cracks in the curtains and I suck air deep into my lungs. Mom's awake.Dad's truck sits in the drive and sticks me like a knife in the heart. I glance at Selena who's looking at it too. She clears her throat, casting her attention to the road."Should I come with?"I nod, not wanting to be left alone with the tornado of emotion undoubtedly waiting for me on the other side of the front door. "Yeah, come with me."We exit the car and make our way to the front porch, Selena dragging my suitcase behind us. My palms grow clammy with every step, my heart racing. What's waiting for me inside? I grab Selena's hand and thread my fingers through hers. She wraps her arm across her body and holds the inside of my elbow. I lean on her
I lie on the bed for a while, thinking about my brother, Chase. Does he even know? Will he have time to attend his father's funeral? I think about it for hours, it feels like. In and out of focus, of exhaustion, of grief, I remain on the bed, my mind too tired to process whether or not I've slept. I must have because the next voice I hear zipping up the stairs is female."Where is she?" Shoes hit the stairs and I shoot up in bed as Selena tears through the door, her pretty face displaying every thread of grief she feels. "Olivia?"Seeing her brings memories flooding back and I burst into tears all over again. Selena rushes over to the bed and climbs on, drawing me into her hoodie-clad arms. We fall against the mattress, our limbs intertwined."I can't believe it." She sniffles, her chest vibrating as she combs her fingers through my hair. "I can't believe it, O.""He's gone," I sob. "And I don't know what I'm supposed to do.""You'll know once you get home." She holds me for a while lo