— Z A H I R —. . .Hoor was right. I can't disagree with her anymore. She said that I took advantage of her vulnerability and that's true. I can't ignore that. It was the moment when we were in the hospital because Parul's health deteriorated. At that time, I really took advantage of her state through the power of money. But Hoor is wrong when she says that I want her as a whore for me. Even that idea never crossed my head. I never even thought about it! How could she blame me like that? I do not see Hoor as that. I respect her. Can't she see it? But as days have passed we have not talked to each other about anything or regarding any matter. Not even what happened last night, our last quarrel in which she literally kicked me out of bed. After that, I really intended to take revenge and I even did that. I put a rubber lizard in the bed which I borrowed from Ryan. He carries such stupid toys to annoy his classmates. He helped me. But what did it give me? Literally nothing! Rev
— H O O R —. . .“...It is I who will qualify you,” I mimic him in the worst possible way to annoy him as I enter the room and find him working on his laptop. He is sitting on the couch, and his legs are spread before him. On his lap, there is his second wife sitting — the laptop. His entire attention was on it unless I entered the room and got all his attention. Looking up from the screen, he cocks his brow at me sexily. I see his lips spreading in a small and very attractive smirk.I close the door behind me, leaning against it uttering, “Ab aise kya dekh rahe ho?”(Now why are you staring at me like that?)“Maine galat kya kaha?” He asks, staying in that position but his head raises as he acknowledges me fully. (What's wrong did I say?)“Of course, you can do as you please blah, blah, blah...” I walk towards him but not to sit beside him. No, no, no, I am not taking that risk anymore. If I go under his clutch, he will do something very seductive! “But you listen to me, oh, M
— H O O R —. . .“We heard that you want to work with Zahir, Hoor,” Dad begins with a soft smile, chewing on his favorite dish. His soft eyes land on me. Right, everybody got to know about it and I know they do not wish to stop me from doing it. As much as I have known the Matthews, I know they are kind and generous. Just my husband is cruel and does things that make me feel like either punching him in the face or strangling him on the bed. “Ah... yes, Dad. But I don't want to do it now,” I say, having my food. The sound of a spoon hitting the plate stops when my brother-in-law glances at me. “You’re letting go of that idea? Why, Hoor?” He asks me gently. “Zahir wants me to be his secretary and I'm not eligible for it,” I reason him correctly and he nods to it. I know he just agreed. “Zahir, can’t you help her with something else?” He turns to Zahir who is busy chewing on his food. His eyes are down but I know his ears are well opened. This clever man listens to each word befo
— Z A H I R —. . .Now she is trying her best to get away from me. Or does she enjoy tormenting me? — To whom should I give special attention among these two? Which reason is better to accept?To be honest, I do not want to pay any attention to assumptions in the first place. It is more cruel. It would not hurt my heart at all to look at the other assumption — the second one. I am ready if she is doing all this to torment me because all this has nothing to do with her feelings, right?She can care about me yet do this all and I will take it all happily. But if she is really willing to go away, it is going to kill me while I am still alive. Hoor and I have gotten closer and I like us together, to be honest. Whatever days we have left, can't we both spend them well and happily?But Hoor has to fight with me every time. I run my fingers through my hair as I get up and sit upright on the bed. She is still in the living room and I do not know what is so important left that needs her at
— H O O R —. . . He did as he said. He wanted me to join him, I am joining him from today. He wanted me to work with him, I have no other way than to get ready for it. He wanted me to come with him, of course, I am going with him. He gets what he wants. However, my heart is still wondering secretly why he is so eager and desperate to have me by his side even when he is working. Days have passed since the night when he came closer to me and I literally cried when we kissed. It is not like he makes me uncomfortable. It was never about it. Around Zahir, I am not uncomfortable. When he comes closer, my body gives in. I know it's the relation between us. The time I have spent with him was always sweet. Just like I said that night, I do not blame him for anything. My emotions too were involved in everything that happened between us. As sweet and pleasant is the feeling of having Zahir close to me is — when we are happy and surely enjoy each other's presence — as bitter is the truth
— H O O R —. . . We reach his office. This is the second time I have visited the place. We get out of the car and the driver takes it away to park it. I grab my bag and stare blankly at the building standing before my eyes. Tall and wonderfully designed. The glass walls were reflecting bright lights falling from above. I unconsciously held tightly onto the strap of my bag. Zahir came and stood beside me. I could feel the sweet warmth that radiated off him. He held my hand gently, intertwining our fingers. My heart skipped a beat at the pleasant touch. I am getting used to it. Like an addicting drug, now it is running through my veins. I wonder if I would ever be able to forget it. I do not think so.I raise my head to look at him. Bright blue eyes smilingly look down at me. His head saves my face from falling under the bright sun rays that are brightening the environment. “Chalein?” He asks me in his soft voice. Soft yet deep and attractive. (Shall we move now?)“Ha zaroor,”
— H O O R — . . . I watch the woman closely whom I found to be my husband's personal secretary. Zahir revealed it very casually, announcing her. I am sure she was informed already, keeping in mind that there is a professional way of announcing such news but still, he said it. Somewhere I feel that Zahir did it to make me realize. I did not know who she was, after all — speaking professionally, because I was not even interested in knowing her name or anything else. She swallows, holding her hands and squeezing them tight. I can't help but notice her small actions but I know Zahir too might have noticed that. The girl is a bit clumsy. Well, a bit?“Yes, sir. I was informed,” she says, nodding her head frantically. Zahir's eyes remain on her. Narrowed they are along with being sharp. I have met that side of Zahir for the first time. He looks very different. Very different than the man who lives with me. “Good.” He stands up, rounding the desk as he comes closer to me. He stands a
— H O O R —. . .Siya explains me everything and I grasp the information as much as possible. Not only Siya but before joining, Zahir also did his part which helped me a lot. Siya leaves soon and after that, I am left alone. I grab my seat and start working then. Before leaving, she told me that every morning, bringing a cup of coffee was also her work but the demand was not regular. Zahir asked for a cup of coffee whenever he needed it. I got it. After Siya leaves, I am indulged in work. Zahir has a lot to handle. After becoming his secretary, I learned that he is indeed a busy man. Like, really busy. Today he is not very busy. He only has to handle the work from his office. He is sitting in the room next to mine and I can't really see him. But he can. It feels awkward to have this realization in mind that he can look at me and as the hour begins, I need to make myself understand that he might be busy and that he won't waste his time keeping an eye on me. But after I got busy
— Z A H I R —. . .It's been days since Hoor and I returned home after attending our relative's wedding. It was awesome, by her side, and on the other hand, I was nearly bored. Only nights were the most beautiful to me because we prayed together and spent some time together. I could not even imagine using the guest's room bed for making love with my wife so I restrained myself. However, it turned out to be a little harder when she kept throwing glances at me and getting ready for the functions. I had no other way than to look at her and praise her. I wanted to do more. After we returned, the first thing I did after taking a shower was to grab her in my arms and hug her like my life depended on it. She giggled, asking me about what changed in ms all of a sudden but I had nothing to answer her. I only breathed at that moment, loving her warmth and the softness of her chest against my head. That's my haven. That night we made love again and the more I explored her, the more needy
— Z A H I R —. . .I rejected it and I regret it now. It has been days since she confessed her feelings to me and I, like a bastard, rejected those feelings. Like every time, I only thought of responsibilities and all, not wishing to give our relationship a chance but after she started avoiding me, I had no other way than to realize my mistake. Hoor does not know, or maybe she is well aware of it that she even takes advantage of it that her ignorance brings me to my knees before her. I have felt it. Hoor makes me feel like I have admitted it to myself. Hoor has become a piece of mine, without whom, I am not whole. I am incomplete without her. I feel restless when she is away from me. When her eyes are not on me, I crave even one look at her. I know I can't live without her and she made me see it in those days. I thought maybe it was because we were getting used to each other so I decided to keep myself away from her. However, my own decision made me feel restless in my heart.
— H O O R —. . .He picks up the call while I sit, anticipating what is going to happen next. I fear Zahir's answer to Mr Hunt. I know he is a nice man but Zahir, in anger, says harsh things. I do not want him to start a fight with Mr Hunt. He puts the call on speaker and looks at me. His eyes linger over my face and solely catch my eyes. I swallow when I hear Mr Hunt's voice. “Hoor?” He asks, and I know I have to keep my mouth shut. “Hoor is with me. And stop calling her, okay?” Okay... It was not as gruff as I expected. I literally expected him to grab Mr Hunt's collar right pushing his hand into the screen of the phone and venting out all the frustration of the past night but he controlled it. Phew!“Uh...”“Yeah,” he breathes and disconnects the lines, tossing away my phone. My eyes widen. “Zahir, it's my phone! Have mercy on it!” I utter, trying to reach for my phone when he grabs my wrist and pulls me to him. I gasp, swallowing as I look at his face. I am glad the sheet
— H O O R —. . .“What's your problem, huh? Why are you behaving like a beast?” I utter, fuming with anger after whatever has happened. He has done this all! His jaw clenches but he does not give me a single look. I see his grip becoming lethal around the steering wheel as he drives the car smoothly. “Ask yourself! What's your problem, Hoor?” He asks instead, giving me a sharp glance over his shoulder. I purse my lips, trying not to say any bad words that will make me regret it later. “I'm totally fine. It's you alone who created a drama there. I don't understand why are you behaving like that!” I do not care if I am making it even more serious. I need answers. The atmosphere inside the car seems to change as it drops. He is trying hard to control his anger but I know he is dangerous when angry. However, I am not afraid to see his limits. Have seen his sides before and no doubt he is going to be like that again; harsh and brutal with words. “Behaving like what? A beast?” He tau
— H O O R —. . .Finding Mr Hunt at the party gave me some kind of relief. As Zahir too knows him, we got interacted and there I got to meet the girl with him. He introduced me to her and she felt pleasant. His choice is very good. However, on the other side, I could see Zahir glaring at us non-stop. It irked me. Now what does he want? I ignored that look. Mr Hunt too noticed how Zahir was keeping a poker face and answering him gruffly every time. When he was called suddenly by some of his partners, it was only Mr Hunt and me left alone. The woman he took with him also left to use the washroom. “Why is he behaving like that?” He asks me in a mutter, confused as he looks at me. My eyes remain on Zahir who is busy holding a conversation with an official man. There are two more with him, keeping him occupied. I stare at him silently, not answering Mr. Hunt for a moment being. I do not feel like doing it or maybe I am too lost admiring my husband among them. He is handsome, after
— H O O R —. . .“May I come in, ma'am?” I know what he is taking with him, and it is only for me to handle. I sigh as I look up from the screen that troubles my eyes. My gaze lands upon a man standing at the door and I am not sure how many times I have seen him today with towers of files in his arms. Only for me!“Of course,” I have to pass him a fake smile.He comes in and sets the tower beside other files. Wow. Just look at my room. How amazing it looks filled with files and files alone. And whose hand is all in this? Surely, my husband's! Because he does not want me to meet Mr Hunt anymore and he can't even confront me and order me around, so he is using such methods to keep me here. Not only that but he is keeping me with himself in meetings. All the meetings which were to be held in the next month and whatever was arranged by me, he thought of completing them all in this month itself. He made me make some changes in the schedule and everywhere he carried me. All this just
— H O O R —. . .“So tell me...” He begins nervously, running a hand through his hair as he looks at me. I wait for him. Maybe he is going to take eternity. Who knows? He is always like that around me; shy and all. Even now he is unable to look me in the eyes. I too do not have any obsession with it. To me, Zahir's eyes are everything. Keeping the straw in my mouth as I enjoy my Faluda ice cream, I steal a glance at his already-flushed face. Now what does he see? I roll my eyes back to the setting sun and realize that I have spent more time with him. I do not worry about my work. I know I will complete the pending tasks but I needed to refresh my mind which he helped me having. He is an amazing friend, to be honest. After how Zahir spoiled my mood with that interrogation, he called me and I came out to meet him. He took me to places around and bought me ice cream. Walk with him was nice as he kept cracking silly jokes. I was even laughing. Yeah, I like such stupid jokes. He wa
— H O O R —. . .Three days have passed. Life is going on as before. The only difference is that whatever happened between Zahir and me seems like a dream. Everything disappeared as soon as I opened my eyes.Work and prayer help me to forget all this every moment, but I cannot use them every moment to escape from the past. Because of whatever happened that night, I still feel as if there are wounds in my heart that have not healed yet. But I know that time will change everything and all wounds will heal. God will do it. Right now I am just waiting for these days to pass. Now that I know that our relationship is not going to improve, I do not want to stay here any longer.Another time my phone rings. It is Mr Hunt. I have been ignoring his calls since this morning but he does not seem to give up. I am not in the mood, simple. I do not want to talk to him but I know I have to. I will be responsible for many things then. Clenching my jaw, I pick up the call and I remove my gaze from
— H O O R —. . .“Are you out of your mind, Hoor?” He says, breaking all my expectations just in a second. I stare at him dumbfounded, my heart sinking deeper. My eyes do not flutter as they are set on him but he has my hands clammy in anticipation. I muster up the courage to ask, “Wh-What do you mean, Zahir?” My tone is confused. Still. I am still expecting him to give me an explanation so it can relieve the burn in my chest. “It's simple, Hoor!” He utters, getting up as he releases a deep sigh. His arm raises and he runs a hand through his hair. Once again as he shows he is frustrated. I narrow my eyes at him, staring at his face as he steps away, continuing, “It's simple that I don't wanna be in a relationship. And haven't I told you that already?” The next he turns around, eyes boring into mine. They hold frustration and anger, resembling a darker and deeper shade of ocean. His jaw clenches as he adds, “I made it clear already!”He did but I started having feelings for him.